#untold thoughts

take advantage of the kindness and love

that i have deep inside me,

letting them take pieces of me

every time they needed one.

trying my best to prove everyone

of things i can do,

until my body feels exhausted,

almost giving up

آوازیں بہت سنائی دے رہی ہیں مجھے

It’s been years and i still don’t know how to grasp the concept of love, sometimes i blame my fucked up family for this. I don’t know what real love is, I actually have no idea what i truly think of it. Is it love still, when someone exerts so much effort into someone and then decides to cheat in the end? can you still call that love? Or did love not exist in the first place? was it nothing but an infatuation? how can you differentiate love from infatuation at this point? There was a time that i really believe that if someone cheats in a relationship that means love was never there, in that person’s heart that is. Through the years, through my previous relationships my concept of love gets deformed somehow but lately i realized that how i viewed love before never left me. What is love truly based on? Is it based on effort? Or how long you’ve been together? Or how much you’ve compromised? After all the things i heard about love, I’m getting to the point that love isn’t a beautiful thing like how the world portrayed it to be. I’m getting the idea that love is based on how much suffering you can take for it to work and I’m starting to think that there is no healthy relationships out there. Love itself is toxic. They say love is supposed to make you feel happy, contented and secured but does it really?

—unique g.