#tyh.predebut

“So, here’s the thing… I just… I’m feeling a little trapped here? Like… I don’t really think signing trainee contract after trainee contract with no sign of debut is like… wise for me.” Chaewon scratched the back of her neck. God, she wished Sunhee was with her right now. Sunhee was the one who knew how to talk to people.  

“So, are you terminating your training with JYP Entertainment?” The employee asked, her frown dipping even lower, creasing her face in a disapproving line. “This is a big decision, Chaewon. We won’t accept you back if you do this.” 

The warning made Chaewon feel uneasy, but her intuition was a little too strong to be swayed by passive aggressive corporate employees.

“Yes. I am. Sorry.” Chaewon added the apology reflexively. The JYP representative gave an unamused chortle. 

“Nothing to be sorry for. Please have your personal items removed from the building within the next 24 hours. I wish you the best of luck.” Chaewon was given one last, thin-lipped smile before being escorted from the office room. 

At the end of the hallway in a small sitting area, Chaewon found Sunhee, who had waited for her since her own meeting had ended twenty minutes ago.

“You didn’t sign, right?” Sunhee demanded, a glimmer of fear in her eyes.

Chaewon furrowed her eyebrows. “Hell no. What kind of person do you take me for?” 

Sunhee beamed before hugging her friend tightly, swaying the two of back and forth. 

“This is the best day ever!” Sunhee cried gleefully, pulling away from her friend. Suddenly Sunhee’s expression dropped and her hands flew up to her face.

“Wait… I didn’t tell Hyunjin.” Sunhee remembered. Chaewon gave a long blink.

“You forgot to tell your second best friend about the biggest career-related move you’ve ever made?” Chaewon questioned in disbelief.

“How am I gonna tell him? Should I just wait until he asks me where I’ve been or-“

“Sunnie.” Chaewon cut her friend off. “We’re going to go see him now. He’ll respect your choice. I know he will.” 

Chaewon’s prediction was a little off.

“You did what?” Hyunjin’s jaw dropped. His exclamation echoed off the hallway walls. Chaewon cringed a little, but Sunhee stood her ground.

“Hyunjin, you know JYP isn’t going to debut a girl group anytime soon. There’s no point in Chaewon and me staying here. There will be more opportunities for us outside of JYP.” Sunhee reasoned, crossing her arms.

Hyunjin ran a hand through his hair, letting out a mirthless huff of disbelief.

“Have you signed with another company yet?” Hyunjin asked, looking between the two girls. 

“Uh,” Chaewon looked at Sunhee. She knew something was missing from their plan. 

Hyunjin smacked his palm to his forehead and tilted his head back. “You guys.” Hyunjin groaned in disbelief. 

“We’re going free agent for a while.” Sunhee improvised. “We’re gonna scout out some different companies, see who we like best, then decide.” 

Hyunjin brought his focus back down to the two ex-trainees in front of him. 

“I just worry about you two.” Hyunjin admitted, any anger or annoyance in his voice was now replaced with concern. “What if we never see each other again?” 

Sunhee rolled her eyes. “Hyunjin don’t be ridiculous. We still go to school together.” 

A smile quirked on Hyunjin’s lips. Silently, he pulled Sunhee in for a hug. Chaewon let them have a few seconds before inviting herself into the hug. 

The three friends huddled together, patting each other’s backs reassuringly. Their moment was interrupted when someone’s shoulder brushed past them, entering the practice room that they were currently loitering in front of. Chaewon looked over in time to see Han Jisung dip into the practice room soundlessly. 

Hyunjin made an annoyed sound in his throat. “I can’t believe you guys are leaving me with him.” 

Sunhee rolled her eyes. “I think you’ll manage. You have a good four inches on him anyways.” 

“True.” Hyunjin tilted his head, as if imagining all the ways he could whoop Han Jisung’s ass. 

Before the trio could say anything else, Jisung stuck his head outside of the practice room, a frown on his face.

“Hyunjin, practice is starting.” He said stiffly. “It’s Sunhee and Chaewon’s last day, I’m saying goodbye.” Hyunjin responded in an equally as stiff tone. Jisung’s expression softened a little, his eyes widening. 

“Wait, really?” He asked, looking between the two girls. Jisung wasn’t exactly their close friend, but they’ve known each other for so long, Chaewon was going to miss seeing him every other day. 

“Yeah, we didn’t resign this morning.” Chaewon explained. Jisung blinked in amazement. “Wow…” He stated, clearly at a loss for words. “Good luck.” 

Chaewon gave a soft smile. “Thank you. You too.” 

“We better find Haeyoon.” Sunhee suggested, patting Chaewon on the shoulder. This was Sunhee’s way of saying ‘let’s get the fuck out of here’. Chaewon nodded. The girls said their final goodbyes to the boys before heading down the hallway to the elevators. 

Chaewon didn’t realize Sunhee was crying until they got into the elevator. Silent streams of salty tears traced down Sunhee’s cheeks, dripping from her chin and onto her shirt. Chaewon furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

“I’m going to miss him.” Sunhee explained simply, her voice barely above a whisper. Chaewon’s shoulders slumped in empathy before hugging her friend comfortingly. Sunhee buried her face in Chaewon’s shoulder, letting out sobs. 

“Did we make a good decision?” Sunhee wondered aloud. Chaewon couldn’t help but laugh.

“Sunnie, it was your idea!” Chaewon giggled. “And all your ideas are good ideas.” 

Sunhee raised her head from Chaewon’s shirt. Her face was blotchy and red, but she still had a small smile on her lips. “You’re the only person alive who thinks my ideas are ‘good’.” 

“That’s because you have a very unique vision, Sunhee. Not everyone understands it.” Chaewon reached up to wipe some stray tears away from her friend's face. The elevator finally dinged, signaling the girls that they reached the ground floor. 

The doors slid open and a wide eyed Haeyoon was looking back at them. The older girls eyes scanned the two friends up and down. “Were you guys cuddling in the elevator?” Haeyoon asked in shock. “Without me?” 

Sunhee laughed, breaking away from Chaewon. “Sorry, Yoonie.” 

“It’s all good.” Haeyoon’s ever-present smile returned to her face as the trio walked towards the main exit. Haeyoon removed her trainee lanyard as they got closer to the door, swinging it over her head like a lasso, aiming for the large trash can near the door. Once they were in range, Haeyoon released the cord, watching with satisfaction as her JYP identification card sailed into the trash can. 

“Hey, no throwing in the lobby!” A security guard chided. 

Haeyoon looked over her shoulder with a smirk. “No worries sir, I’m already seeing myself out.” 

Sunhee, who’s mood seemed to be heightened since they exited the elevators, threw her lanyard away too. Chaewon ripped hers off, looking at her ID picture one last time. She seemed so much younger in this picture, despite it only being taken two years prior. The picture smiling back at her didn’t resonate anymore. She wasn’t who she used to be, and she wasn’t going to find the new her at JYP Entertainment.

When dinner was served, the two girls sat across from each other, not speaking. Soojin was toying with her food, but the chopsticks in her hands never came close to her lips. Jisoo put down her own chopsticks and pursed her lips, unsure how to console her friend.

“You know, it’s been nearly five months.” Jisoo started slowly. Soojin didn’t look up from her plate. “I know you’re not under YG anymore, but there’s so many other companies out there that would be so lucky to have you.” The other girl scoffed at this statement. Jisoo furrowed her eyebrows. “I’m speaking the truth.” “Ji, I appreciate your concern, but I don’t think I want to be an idol anymore.” Soojin said flatly. There was a thick silence in the air.

“I also think I’m going to move back with my parents next month.” Soojin said quietly, but her words still echoed in the kitchen.

“What?” Jisoo looked shocked. The two of them have been living together since Soojin became a trainee at YG. The idea of Soojin leaving and no longer being her roommate was unsettling to Jisoo.

“Yeah, there’s no point in me staying here.” Soojin shrugged. “I mean, you’re going to be moving out soon to live with your new group mates and there’s no work here for me. I think living with my parents is kind of my only option.” “Stop acting like your life is over!” Jisoo snapped, getting tired of her friend’s sulky attitude. “If you get out there, you will get picked up by another company and you will debut. You have too much talent to just go to waste! Living with your parents is rock bottom, and you are nowhere close to being rock bottom.”

“It sure doesn’t feel like I can get any lower.” Soojin sulked. Jisoo sighed and shook her head, picking her plate up. 

“You have so much to live for. You just need to open your eyes.” She said quietly before placing her plate in the sink and hurrying to her bedroom.

Soojin warmed up her voice and made sure the camera was on her. She had exactly three hours until Jisoo returned from practice, and she still had so much to do. It’s been two days since Jisoo and Soojin had their little argument in the kitchen. Soojin figured that her friend was right. She hadn’t hit rock bottom yet. She just needed to get back into the game.

After pressing record on her camera, she stood in the center of her living room, took a deep breath and then opened her mouth.

She looked around, hoping to see Asahiko somewhere among the staff, but she had a feeling he wasn’t here. She hasn’t talked to Asahiko since she last called him that night. Their schedules were just too busy. She wanted to see him so bad that the thought of him being in this building with her excited her.

“Where did these come from?” Micha asked, knowing they came from Asahiko, but wanting the confirmation.

“Your friend dropped them off when you were performing. He had to leave, but he said there was a letter for you.” A manager informed Micha, gesturing to the envelope that was nestled in the bouquet.

As her stylist redid her hair, she took the note off the flowers and opened it slowly.

Dear Micha,

Or should I be calling you Yen now?

Congratulations on your debut! I hope it was everything you wanted and more. From the moment I saw you dancing in that practice room, I knew you had the potential to become an amazing idol. And I was totally right. Like I always am. 

You’ve gone through many hardships to get to where you are and I hope you are as proud of yourself as I am proud of you. 

I’ll work hard so I can be good enough to be able to perform side by side with you on stage. You continue to inspire me, even after all this time.

Want to know a fun fact? Daffodils represent new beginnings. How fitting. 

Anyways, here’s to your new beginning as the ever-talented, totally brilliant, spectacular Yen! 

Lots of Love, 

Asahiko/Asa 

P.s we should totally get ice cream tonight. My treat.

Micha and Asahiko left the convenience store with ice creams in their hands. They walked out of the lights of the shops and pulled down their face masks so they could enjoy the icy treat before it melted.

“So, you’re an official idol now. How does it feel?” Asahiko asked as he walked beside her, licking his ice cream. 

“Honestly, I kinda feel the same.” Micha shrugged. “But that also might be because everything is so surreal to me still.” 

Asahiko nodded in understanding. “At least you’re not a total diva anymore.” “Anymore?” “You went through that diva phase not too long ago.” Asahiko reminded her. Micha frowned and bit her ice cream, knowing he was right.

“Anyway, I’m the same old me, except now I’m an actual idol singer.” Micha said before looking up at Asahiko. “And you’ll be joining me soon, Asa.” She emphasized Asahiko’s stage name. “I’m getting you the biggest bouquet of flowers for your debut. Your whole dressing room will be covered with them when you get off stage.”

“What did I do to deserve a friend like you.” Asahiko said semi-sarcastically.

“I don’t know, but I think we were destined to be apart of each other’s lives. Maybe this is our like, tenth life together or something.” Micha said thoughtfully, taking another bite of her ice cream.

“What would we have been in our past lives?” He asked curiously, a smile forming on his lips.

Micha thought for a minute. “Two daffodils that were lucky enough to grow right next to one another in a flower patch.” She said. “Either that or two freezer burned watermelon ice creams.”

Asahiko laughed at the idea and threw an arm around Micha’s shoulders. 

“Either way, we ended up next to each other, despite the odds.” She said, wrapping her free arm around Asahiko’s torso.

“Is that your cheesy way of saying you’ll always be by my side?” Asahiko baited.

“Yes. It is.” Micha looked up at him and gave him a toothy smile. Asahiko returned the smile. 

“Friends don’t leave parties together and then hang out in a bedroom alone for three hours.” Injung shaded, his fingers running over the petals of flowers. Asahiko rolled his eyes. 

“Not this again.” He groaned. When the HBH boys came back to the dorm on Valentine’s Day, they saw Micha and Asahiko sitting under a blanket together watching a movie on Asahiko’s bed. Ever since then, he’s been bullied by his friends and teased constantly.

“Anyways, I’m getting Eunha white flowers for White Day, since she gave me chocolates on Valentine’s Day.” Injung said, glancing over at Asahiko. “Friends can give other friends stuff on White Day. Maybe Micha would like a little gift?” 

Asahiko rolled his eyes for the nth time. Even though he fronted as opposed to the idea in front of his friends, he thought it would be nice to give Micha something. He let his eyes wander until they landed on a specific flower.

He tried to look indifferent as he walked over to the white daffodils and picked up a couple of them.

“Hey, Soyeon, Happy White Day.” Daehyun said, coming over to Soyeon and the others while they were leaving the building that night. He held the small bouquet of white flowers in front of Soyeon, who looked a little uncomfortable with the gift, but she accepted it anyways.

Asahiko felt the small collection of white daffodils in his bag grow ten times heavier. Next to him, Micha was gushing over the present.

“How can Daehyun and Soyeon deny dating rumors when they’re out here being the cutest pair at HBH?” she said quietly as they left the building and made their way to the subway. 

“Yeah, but something tells me Soyeon isn’t very interested in him.” Asahiko said, watching the other two walk side by side awkwardly about twenty feet in front of them. Micha huffed out a laugh as they approached the subway station.

 Asahiko was getting anxious about giving Micha her gift. He should have done it that afternoon during lunch, but that’s when Injung gave Eunha her gift, and he didn’t feel like stealing their thunder. There hasn’t been a ‘right’ moment yet, and they haven’t been alone.

It was only when they were about three stops from where they had to get off of the subway did Asahiko open his bag and hand Micha the crumpled up white daffodils and half-crushed cookies that he got her earlier. 

“I should have given you these earlier, but there didn’t seem to be a right time. I’m sorry. Happy White Day.” Asahiko was slightly embarrassed by the state of his gift. Micha couldn’t help but laugh as she accepted the gift.

Practice was a great way to ignore these feelings. During rehearsal he only cared about getting the footwork down and perfecting his rap flow. His mind was taken over by music and performing, there was no room for not-so-friendly thoughts about his friend.

But still, every night when he got back to his dorm and looked up at the ceiling, he couldn’t help but wish Micha was there too, resting her head on his chest like she did that one night.

He was thinking of that day when his phone buzzed beside his bed.

MICHA: are you up? [sent: 2:09 am]

ASAHIKO: yeah, you good? [sent: 2:10am]

MICHA: yeah, I just can’t sleep. [sent: 2:10am]

MICHA: and I miss you. [sent: 2:10am]

ASAHIKO: I miss you too. [sent: 2:11am]

MICHA: can I call you? [sent: 2:13am]

ASAHIKO: yeah, of course. [sent: 2:14am]

Micha’s caller ID popped up on his home screen. He dragged his thumb across the call button and put the phone up to his ear.

“Hey.” He said, sitting up a little straighter.

“Hey.” Micha responded, her voice sounded drained.

“You can’t sleep?” Asahiko asked, concerned. “Yeah.” Micha said, sounding a little embarrassed. “I’m just stressed lately and I find your voice very soothing.”

Asahiko’s heart thumped in his chest at those words. “Do you want me to like, do ASMR or something?” Asahiko chuckled, trying to not sound flustered. 

“No, silly.” Micha chuckled herself. “Just talk about anything. Like… how was your day? I want a detailed run through of what you did.” Asahiko could hear her smile through the phone, but he ignored it and shifted himself so he was laying on his back again and staring at the ceiling.

“Well, I woke up at around five this morning to go to practice…” He said softly. He recited his day to Micha, who hummed every now and then as a response. After a while, he humming started to become more and more infrequent. Eventually he heard that light snoring that he found so adorable. A lazy smile spread across his face.

“Good night, Micha.” He whispered before beginning to hang up.

“Wait.” Her sleepy voice said through the phone. “Thank you.”

Asahiko grinned a little wider. “You’re welcome.” “I love you. Seriously. You’re such a good friend” she said, her voice lulled, clearly half asleep. The combination of ‘I love you’ and ‘friend’ together sent an ache through Asahiko’s stomach. 

Asahiko was already bored at the New Years party. He knew things would get better once Micha showed up, but right now he was getting a little tired of Chunghee and Injung’s bickering. “I’m telling you, I was in a relationship!” Chunghee flew his hands up in the air in exasperation. “With who then?” Injung questioned, looking unamused. “I can’t say! It’s confidential!” Chunghee said it as if was obvious. “She’s a trainee under SM!” “Right, and I’ve secretly been dating HyunA.” Injung chuckled.

“I’m being serious, bro!”

“Woah.” Changmin spoke up for the first time since the four boys sat down at their table. Asahiko turned around in his seat and had to blink a few times. “Is that…?” Injung squinted. “B.A.D.” Daehyun confirmed, his eyes wide as well.

Micha caught them looking and waved quickly to them, smiling politely before following her group mates to shake hands with the head producer and founder of the company. 

“Bro, you gotta set me up with Micha.” Chunghee’s hand clapped over Asahiko’s shoulder. Daehyun gave Chunghee a death glare and the boy removed his hand slowly. “Uh, that is if there’s nothing going on between you two.” “What? Of course there isn’t.” Asahiko said, snapping his attention away from Micha and her group mates. “Since when are you interested in Micha?” “I mean, she’s always been pretty, so, I guess she’s always been on my radar.” Chunghee said thoughtfully. “Except for when I was in a relationship.” “Dude, you gotta let it go…” Injung rehashed the previous argument, but this time Asahiko really wasn't listening. Did everyone find Micha attractive? He knew she was pretty, but he never really thought much about how other people probably found her pretty too.

 It was all he could think about when the whole company gathered around to watch the ball drop and Micha was standing right next to him. They were standing awfully close, since everyone was gathered around the television, including staff members.

 “FIVE,” 

 Asahiko looked down at Micha.

“FOUR,”

He remembered that one time he kissed her on the couch in the boy’s dorm.

“THREE,” He thought she was pretty when he first met her.

“TWO,” Did everyone think Micha was beautiful too? 

“ONE!” The room exploded with cheers as the ball dropped. People pretended to kiss one another dramatically, others had their arms wrapped around other people. Asahiko was still staring at Micha. When she turned to face him, her smile brought him back down. He copied her smile and hugged her tightly. 

“One more year of friendship!” Micha screamed over the noise.

“Hey!” He heard a voice call from down the hallway, and the girl who was previously dancing was walking towards him, her fist clenched.

This is it. Asahiko said to himself as the distance between them grew smaller. She’s going to kill me, right here, right now. “You dropped this.” The girl held out her hand, holding his keys in her palm. Asahiko blinked a few times at the girl, his mouth agape. She was a lot prettier up close. Her eyes were a dark chocolate color and her lashes were lush. He was used to seeing attractive people (he looked at one every day in the mirror when he got ready), but for some reason her beauty was different. It was unexpected. “Thank you.” He managed to get out, taking back his keys and sliding them into his backpack.

“Are you the new Japanese trainee?” The girl asked bluntly out of curiosity.

“Yes.” Asahiko said with a small smile. Internally he was cursing at himself for knowing such limited Korean. He wanted to tell her more about himself, but the language barrier was restricting him.

“My name is Micha.” The girl, Micha, said in Japanese, extending her hand. Asahiko took it, his eyebrows shooting up. 

“Do you speak Japanese?” He asked, his hand still shaking Micha’s up and down.

Micha hesitated. “No. Only a little.” The dancer said in an apologetic tone.

“I only know a little Korean. We are even.” Asahiko said with a grin.

“I guess we are.” Micha chuckled. 

“Hey, Asachiko!” Another voice said from down the hallway. Coming towards the two were the boys Asahiko had been practicing with for a couple months now. Even though they were nice guys, they always mispronounced his name, no matter how many times he said it for them. Asahiko realized he was still holding Micha’s hand and released it immediately.

“Hello.” Asahiko greeted his fellow trainees, wondering if they saw anything that just happened between him and Micha. The other two greeted Micha politely before walking into the practice room.

“I have practice,” Asahiko explained, feeling sorry that they had to part so soon.

“No worries. See you around, Asachiko.” Micha said with a shrug before turning on her heels and walking away down the hallway.