#twivel

(Last Sunday: To meet expenses Chartan works as a chauffeur and drives wealthy widow Minerva Woods to her therapy session in San Francisco. He is miffed when she calls him “driver,” not Chartan.)

  Chartan sat in the parked limo at the crest of Russian Hill in a space reserved for clients of the famed psychiatrist, Dr. Ivan Kodor. He knew the doctor’s work but scoffed at his theories. He took a…

Chartan and the Widow

The Adventures of Chartan is a serial-style, fast fiction account of a struggling guru with a massive ego. Posts will be every Sunday until Chartan goes to the Great Beyond. Today’s post, Chartan and the Widow, follows last Sunday’s premiere—please see the recent posts index on the right to read The Adventures of Chartan: Part One.

Chartan’s ego took a monthly beating when his apartment rent was…

Mays woke up in a bad mood most mornings. He tried not to inflict his anger on his wife, Jessie, but some days it was hard not to yell, even at her. He was a drill sergeant who channeled anger into discipline. His charges were young men, some who wanted to be in the Army and some who didn’t. He called each one of them “Joe” to rob them of any self-identify that might interfere with their thinking…

The Adventures of Chartan: Part 1

The lights in the room went out, leaving five people seated in darkness. A murmur of concern arose until a feint overhead light came on, revealing a dark-haired man in the center of the room. His lips were noticeably red.

“You can see my face,” said the man, “but not the person next to you.—that doesn’t matter. Simply concentrate on me. I am Chartan.”

The room was filled with the sounds of shoe…

“Welcome to the Sunshine Club where every drink is a step closer to a better day, at least for the people who own this dump. I’m the Offensive Comic in case you couldn’t read the marquee. Could the gentleman in the back row move to the right? The house lights are hitting your toupee. Go easy on the oil next time!”

After the show the comic sat by himself at the bar. It was nearly 1 a.m. The…

Mandy cleared her throat and said, “Low-Bid Painting and Plastering Company, how can I help you? “

A few minutes later she hung up and yelled out, “A woman named Vera needs a paint bid on her house, inside and out.”

A young man stumbled into the office.

“I need breath mints,” said Johnny.

“Have you been drinking again?”

“It was my lunch break.”

The woman shook her head and then threw a package of…

Dean walked into the dimly lit bar with a half dozen people on stools. He sat next to a fat man who appeared to be asleep sitting up.

The bartender shoved a coaster in front of him.

“JD on the rocks.”

Dean thought the setting was fitting for someone about to fail. Six hours ago he shot a 76 in his attempt to qualify for a PGA card–the country club where he gave lessons required he have one. If he…

Marv and Joe were friends who worked together crunching number for a state agency. They passed the time sharing fantasies about what they’d do if either won the lottery. One day Marv leaned back in his chair and asked Joe to read out the day’s winning numbers.

“6, 15, 16 ,31, 45, 17.”

“Thought so,” replied Marv. He pulled a ticket out of his shirt pocket. “This is my last day on the job.”

Joe…