#tw:hanging

He didn't know how his life had led to this moment but Franco was sat on his bed, in Dare's trailer, staring at the little bag of heroin, a needle, a spoon, a tourniquet and a lighter. He'd be lying if the needle didn't freak him out, make him feel sick to his stomach but he'd also be lying if he said he didn't want or need this.

He took a deep breath as he picked up the spoon and the powder before catching his reflection in a mirror. His eyes were dark, his hair a mess and he knew he didn't smell too pleasant but he couldn't face normal activities until he got some sleep and this powder in his hand, it would give him the sleep he needed.

He sprinkled some of the powder onto the spoon. He'd 'paid' for at least four doses so tried to get a quarter of it out before resealing the bag and picking up the lighter and flicking it under the spoon, waiting for the powder to liquefy enough to be drawn into the syringe.

He found the whole process up to this point a breeze, for someone who had only ever touched cannabis before, he felt like a pro but it was now that he had to touch the needle his hands got clammy and started to shake. He quickly picked it up and drew up the liquid and then placed the needle back on the bed.

He leant back against the wall and took a moment to calm himself, his hands shaking would not help this go easily. He closed his eyes, images flashing before him. He saw the people that kidnapped him. He heard their cruel taunts, felt their hands and feet on his body as they punched and slapped and kicked him, breaking his bones. He felt the shame of losing bladder control the first time and pissing himself. He heard them tell him they were going to 'dose him with a large dose and he probably wouldn't make it'.

His thoughts drifted then to how he'd felt when he realised Darius and Charlie had had to carry his body out of that casino. His bloody, beaten and piss covered body. He felt ashamed at how someone had seen him that way, how his best friend and crush had found him.

Tears started to form in his eyes as his thoughts once again changed to his family. He'd known when he ran that he was giving up any chance of making things work with them. He'd thought many times, when he was kidnapped, how he would never see them again. How the last thing they would know of him was how much he hated them for 'what they did' when, all they had really done, was support his sister that little bit more.

The tears began to fall when his thoughts turned to Darius and The Black Hood. He'd been the one to find Dare. He'd been the one to cut down his broken and bloody body. He'd been the one saw Dare's body hanging in the wind. Every time he tried to close his eyes, it was all he could see. All he could think and he'd be jolted back, his mind racing. He'd interfered with The Black Hood's plan, what if that meant he was next?

He opened his eyes again and, with his hands shaking, grabbed the tourniquet, wrapping it around the top half of his arm. He flexed his hand a few times, mesmerized by his veins popping up in the crook of his elbow. He nodded at them, as if they were people, asking for what was to come.

That was when he picked the needle up. That was when his tears fell with no mercy. He sobbed hard, the needle clutched in one hand, his eyes still staring at his target site, his mind throwing all the images he'd seen at him on a loop. With an unsteady hand, he brought the needle to his skin and placed the tip again his tanned skin, applying no pressure but just watching. He was so close, so close to release.

Before he pushed in, he thought of Aaron. The man seemed to genuinely show concern for him but it was just sex right? Sex in payment for drugs. He'd sold his body for drugs and that, that was the thought that allowed himself to push the needle into his skin. He hissed as it broke through but he closed his eyes as he pressed down on the lever and released the drug into his blood stream.

Once it had been depleted, he withdrew the needle and placed it back on the bed next to him. It could only have been five minutes or less when he felt heroin start to move through his system and his eyes rolled back into his head as his head rolled back against the wall. His arms dropped to his side and his whole body slackened.

Although it was drug induced and illegal, it was the first time he was able to drift into a deep sleep without emotional and physical pain and, for the time being, it would do.