#turnipsapling

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*

Great Guardian: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

Everyone:

Ghastly Tree: ...I did. I broke it.

Great Guardian: No. No you didn't. Sludge?

Sludge: Don't look at me. Look at Subject 1.

Subject 1: What?! I didn't break it.

Sludge: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Subject 1: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Sludge: Suspicious.

Subject 1: No, it's not!

King Krab: If it matters, probably not, but Magmoraug was the last one to use it.

Magmoraug: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

King Krab: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Magmoraug: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Krabs!

Ghastly Tree: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Guardian.

Great Guardian: No! Who broke it!?

Everyone:

King Krab: Great Guardian... Sludge's been awfully quiet.

Sludge: REALLY?!

King Krab: YEAH. REALLY!

*Everyone starts arguing*

Great Guardian, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.

Great Guardian: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Great Guardian: *looks back at the chaos*

Omg with pleasure!!

Juno’s the daughter of a mob boss and wields a nail-covered bat she nicknamed “the Chump Cudgel”. Her father’s incredibly protective of her but she’s proven more than capable at self-defense and is ruthlessly ambitious in the field.

She’s got a bit of a temper and enjoys dark humor but has a soft spot for the finer things and is pretty meticulous about her appearance! She’s got no problem getting clocked in the jaw, but if her hair or claws are ruined then she’ll fly into a murderous frenzy 😬

Hehehe *shames your baby*