#turnerkanes

the alcohol has been flowing all day. it was a rare saturday ben and clalum had to themselves, so they’d spent the day in the city: shopping and drinking and eating and drinking again. they’d arrived back to the square around 8pm, the right side of tipsy and so damn happy, neither of them ready to end the night yet. so they headed to the pub, for a nightcap, callum had said. (which ben obviously teased him about. nightcap? bloody hell, how old are you cal?)

only it didn’t end up being just a nightcap at all, no - not when their was some hunk night going on. they’d stayed to watch, just for a laugh to being with, but then mick was coming over to them and begging one of them to get up and flaunt themselves around the stage in the skills-based auction. callum was absolutely insistent that he was not moving from his seat, no way in hell, but ben on the other hand - well, he was only all too eager to help a friend out. 

callum did a good job of convincing himself he didn’t care. not one bit. ben would probably end up just having to fix up some old ladies garden anyway, harmless. he let the bidding get to the £100 mark before he started paying attention, there was another one of the hunks calling out to double everyone else’s bids and callum didn’t like it one bit. he was pretty sure this twat didn’t want ben to just water his garden.

callum stood up then, pint in hand and head raised in confidence as he made his way to stande right next to the slimy lad bidding on his boyfriend. he raised his hand to match every bid as linda was just about to grant the lad the winner. the back and forth bidding lasted a good few minutes and suddenly they were reaching £200. callum thought briefly about letting the muscle-man win, but he was too proud of that. “300 quid” is what he shouted out instead, daring the man to outbid him. 

“sold to callum highway for 300 quid!”

“well it’s for a good cause ain’t it? right?” callum had replied, and honestly he didn’t know nor did he care, as long as he was the one taking ben home tonight, all was right in the world. 

“you’ve just paid 300 quid to spend the afternoon with your boyfriend you idiot.” is all ben had to say to him when he’d come off the stage. before kissing him stupid right in front of the slimy twats face. and sure, callum will probably have one hell of a hangover tomorrow, but at least he’ll have ben to make it all better. 

listen i am no state physically or emotionally to be able to not only process today’s events but then articulate how i felt about them but FUCK IT im gonna do it anyway

the fact that they r living in domestic bliss……  like i dunno what else to call it they are just really boyfriends……. callum is ben’s man…….. and the consistent casual affection…. another shoulder kiss……… HEIGHT DIFFERENCE…… the fact that they couldn’t have their candlelit dinner yesterday so they literally rearranged it for THE NEXT DAY (even tho it seems like ben stayed over) like they have no patience……. the fact that ben was so sorry he was late AGAIN bc they had a DATE and he was caught up at WORK……… the fact that said work was him dangling a man off a bridge and threatening his wife and children….. the fact that ben can switch between literal scumbag and soft affectionate boyfriend…………. also that inspirational level of pettiness 

literally ben was at his Peak today esp w his sarcastic ass ‘i’m sorry i can’t hear you i’m a bit deaf’ we really and truly got the best of both worlds of sweet lovely ben and absolute scummy bastard ben and for that i’m so thankful (also the fact that he was like ‘of course i cried i was a CHILD martin’ really was so kdjfskdlsdkf)

there is just a lot idk idk like the fact that callum told ben about the video and what leo had done and then ben reassuring him that he’s not a bad person made me :-( and their little banter like ‘you really know how to make a boy feel special’ or w/e he said like i LOVE their banter it’s so cute

also callum !!! confronting leo!!!!!! him being like ‘regardless of what i’ve done what the fuck are YOU playing at’…… calling him the FUCK out, not tip toeing around it or trying to be nice…. like that whole scene was a big WHEW….. callum looks sexy with a backbone

ALSO the fact that after he did that and ben threatened to drop the local greengrocer off a bridge they were both so h*rny that they couldn’t even HAVE their candlelit meal before they were all over each other….. breakin lamps n shit………. it’s so beautiful bro i love soulmate culture

and that whole scene…… that literally started out at 100 and somehow just got better and better i was literally sitting here like :O watching it the disbelief was so real………. god everything about that was *chefs kiss* but i was not expecting that at all and i can’t even begin to process it yet…… the gifs r really fuckin killing me tbh………… i need more time 

also every bailey and karen scene!!! it was so heartbreaking !!! ‘i don’t know how to make this better’ ‘i don’t either’!!!!! what the fuck!!!!

and stuart dressed as a hotdog……….. ricky really has been killing it w that deadpan delivery lately lmaoskdflskfl

I am so soft and this hurt me to write

If Callum’s honest, really honest, there is nobody in this world who can piss him off more than Ben Mitchell. 

Sure, he gets angry. Mostly at his brother or his dad, but that’s different. He calms down and moves on. With Ben, he can think about it for days, randomly remember something he said and fall back into that pit of anger and frustration. Seethe silently as he goes over paperwork at his job, or slam his mug of tea down just a little too hard until Whitney’s tutting and running for a paper towel. 

He’s never met anybody who manages to get under his skin quite like Ben, and the worst part is that he doesn’t even have to do much. Every joke or wink or knowing glance sets Callum on edge. 

The first time he really, truly lets his anger out, Ben just laughs. Callum yells and digs his nails into his palm until his throat is sore and his skin starts to bleed- but Ben doesn’t rise to him. In fact, he doesn’t even stand up. Just relaxes on his sofa, looking up at Callum as if to say “is that all you got?”.

Ian has to buy a new living room door that week.

Ben isn’t so cool the next time. He’s taking Lexi on a day out when they stumble across Callum, sulking on his own outside the chippy. Ben is fully prepared to ignore the other man, try to focus on his daughter- and makes that very clear to Callum when he tries to talk to him.

But Callum won’t take the invitation to piss off. He had been thinking about the way Ben laughed at him the last time, the anger stewing all day. He follows them as they leave, trying to get Ben to respond in any way. 

And it’s a good thing Kathy was working a shift in the Prince Albert at that time, because within minutes Lexi is sent to go help her gran, and Callum finds himself with his back up against the brick wall of the alley beside the chippy. It’s a little too public for Callum. Ben knows, but doesn’t necessarily care.

Whitney asks what happened to his face later on, and Callum spins a lie about tripping over his own feet and diving head-first into the concrete. He makes a note to never hassle Ben while he’s with Lexi again; but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t press at the bruises hours later, just to make them sting.

stuart and rainie DIE

no im kidding i should be so lucky 🤢

im not fully aware of spoilers but im going to go off what ive seen - may be wrong

ok so we kno sociopath stuart locks ben in the boot of a car (classic stu) if callum doesnt free ben from that boot im gonna be raging ino hes 23 but he’s an old man at heart his back could Break u guys

if callum hits ben at the stag or anything im not watching his wedding im angry at him - if ben hits callum im not watching his hoe down with keanu im angry at him

my only real prediction for the stag is that i’ll Definitely be angry at stuart , and i Could be angry and ben / callum

ben ghostwrote this