#tsosa

Before I say anything, I just want you to read this:

Let me tell you, I had no idea how accurate that description was until I played it. That is a damned accurate description, and quite frankly, the only way to describe the experience that this was.

Anyways, I had ran across it when going through my game files, and I was like "Oh yeah! This game exists!" and decided to write a review on this one. I played this game many moons ago, and frankly, I don't see many people talking about or referencing this one; I honestly feel like more people should know about it, because there is a game to be played here. I mean, how many people are actually going to run across this review, I have no idea, but shit, hopefully it'll get a few extra downloads, because as "cheesy" as it may look, this was actually a pretty damn good game!

Honestly (and respectfully) speaking, you know how you look at a game, and you're like "This is probably going to be bad, but I'm curious"? From looking at the backgrounds they used, the description itself, and how they described the game as "cheesy" and a "creepypasta fanfic", I honestly thought this was supposed to be one of those "intentionally bad but funny as hell" games for jokes, but...yeah, no. If it was meant to be that way, I didn't get that at all.

I'll explain more in the actual review portion, but I'm going to go ahead and cut to the chase. As always, I give you the disclaimer that -- and those that have been vibing with me since the start of all of this already know -- I'm going to tell you as much as possible about the game without ruining the game itself.

Just as a side note, I think I do say that verbatim every time I write a review -- between that, "so boom", and the whole "drink water, don't be dumb" thing lol. I might switch it up one day, but that's honestly how I talk in real life. Like, can you not tell that I type the way that I speak? I mean, if it was something for college or work or something, yeah, I'm going to code switch, obvi, but for stuff like this? I'm pretty much talkin' to y'all like y'all are the squad because...well, y'all are lol.

Anyways! Enough chitchat, let's get summarizing.

So, boom (lmao ya see?).

We're in class, and we're tired as fook. Like, it's not even that "Damn, this class is boring" type of tired; it's that "I deadass haven't slept in 2 days, and I'm starting to hear colors and see sounds" type of tired. That "Ayo, why does this hard ass desk feel mad comfortable all of a sudden" type of tired. That plain and simple "a bitch is TIDE not tired" type of tired. Anyways, we recognize this as a current problem, and we know that we've gotta do something about it. Expeditiously. So, we hit up the vending machine, get something to wake us up a little, and then head on home.

When I say that it took everything to get up those stairs and to our bedroom...listen.

Like, as soon as we got through the door, we dropped that backpack to the floor, and we dive -- you hear me, dive -- into that bed. Now, with the way that we were feeling, dreamland should've been immediate. To be real with you, we were probably asleep by the time we were mid-air, but like, when we landed, we landed on something, and this something -- or rather someone -- goes "Ow". Like huuuuuuuh?

Again: Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuh? Fuck you mean, "Ow?" Like who the hell is yooooooooou?!

No, like, we literally ask who he -- ...it? --- is, because clearly, he was not here when we left, let alone just chilling in our bed, but he's just super casual about it, like, "Oh! I'm Vance!". Like, oh, right, Vance; that suddenly makes this whole situation totally normal and nothing to worry about -- as if that were even slightly true.

Here's the thing though, oddly enough, it actually is kind've true. See, we're not scared of him as a...whatever he is, but something about him is just...not right; something is very clearly off. Like, when he had introduced himself, he had shook our hand, and we immediately got this mad intense feeling of dread that we couldn't describe, and something about it just kind've made us feel like we were, quite literally, spiraling into insanity.

Naturally, we pull ourselves away from him and step back -- that spiraling feeling and anxiety is instantly gone. As you've probably guessed, it didn't take us long to put together that it's not good for this "Vance" creature to be too close in proximity, let alone anywhere near us.

He kind've picks up on this, and he's adamant that he's not going to hurt us. Still, we try to explain to him that, while we're not really threatened by him, we get this weirdly intense feeling whenever he's nearby, and he essentially needs to stay a little more than an arm's length away at all times; frankly, the further away, the better. Well...

He didn't take that well, and now, we feel threatened by him.

I hadn't mentioned this before, but Vance was already pretty upset that we wouldn't really let him come near us, let alone cuddle with him, but now he's extra pissed because we're essentially rejecting him altogether, even though he's, quite literally, driving us insane.

So, now that he's like this, we've got to get the hell out of there because, now, we aren't sure if he's still on the whole "I'm not going to hurt you" energy like before. That being said, we completely bolt, and he's like "Nah, bring that ass here, boi". Panic. Big panic time.

So, we do. We run off, but it does no good, because he finds us.

Granted, he doesn't know exactly where we are, but it doesn't matter because we're completely cornered. What are we going to do?

Well, let me rephrase that I know what I'm going to do; better yet, I know what I did. Now you guys on the other hand? Lol, I'll guess you'll have to play it for yourself to see what y'all are going to do.

I had honestly forgotten how good this game was until I had replayed it to grab some screenshots and to get a refresher on what actually went down. I'm not even kidding about that. My love for the game had literally re-sparked, and I can't believe that I forgot how good it was. If you've read my past reviews, you know that I mentioned at one point that I become an absolute slut for a choice-heavy game -- this is a choice heavy game and a damned good one. Speaking of choice-heavy...

Just to get off topic very slightly, you know what was crazy? When I went to replay it, apparently, I had done something different than when I had first played though the game and lmaoooooo, do you know that I had ended up finding THREE more endings? Wanna know something even crazier? One of them was a secret ending that I didn't even realize that I had gotten to!

Now mind you (lol you know the story is about to get a lil' spicy when that's said)! I had already unlocked like...if I remember right, like, 14 endings at this point, so when I found these other endings -- again, by total accident because, at this point, damn the review! I'm legit replaying the game for me, now -- I was now sitting at a grand total of 17 endings. So, now, I'm like "Ayo, what the hell?". Like, my mind is blown, because I was so sure that I had found all of the endings and completed the game. Remember, I hadn't touched or thought about this game in literal months because I was that confident that I had finished it. So, it's like, how many endings are there if I'm still managing to find more?

Naturally, I sprint to the dev's game page to conduct research on this burning question, and I am reading everything that there is to offer, but there was nothing. No "hey, this game has x amount of endings", no walkthrough map, no nothing. Did that stop me, though? Nah, because surely someone had experienced something similar to what I just had and was also like "Damn, how many endings are there...?". Lmaooooo well, I was right. You know what the answer is?

19. There are nineteen endings in this game.

I already knew the answer, but I go back to count the amount of endings that I have; there's 17. I dig into the game files for some more hints, and I find two icons (you'll know what I mean when you play it) that I've never seen before. Oh, okay. So, it's confirmed, but let me make sure that I've got the details straight:

Are you seriously telling me that, not only had I incorrectly assumed that I had all of the endings and finished the game because I had gotten all of the achievements, but the fact that I found three other endings -- again, by accident! -- doesn't even matter because I'm still missing two more because there's NINETEEN ENDINGS total?!

Wild. Chaotic even, and you're damn right that I'm here for it all. I LOVE that there are so many endings. I love even more that I have other endings to look for because I'm totally in love with this game all over again. Even though, lol, it was the deadpan, nonchalant "19" from the dev for me. The dev said "I said what I said, and what about it?". We love to see it.

Anyways, I'm a huge advocate for this game. If you've got some time, definitely give it a try. I highly recommended, and Vance is a pretty sweet dude, if you can find that side of him, I mean. Also, just for a very light spoiler but not really, the real ending was so sweet to me. Like something about it, it just...I don't know. It was just a warm feeling that washed over me when I had read it, and I was just like "That was actually really cute?" Bittersweet, even. Like, ugh, I am honestly really pushing for more people to play this game. It was genuinely so good, and I hope that the dev comes out with more visual novels. I truly forgot how in love with this game I was until I replayed it. This has, highkey, been a great experience.

Anywho, it's time that I stop my rambling and end it here. If you'd like to give this game a go for yourself and discover all 🌟nineteen🌟 endings -- which I highly recommend that you do -- a link to the game is at the very bottom of this post as well as at the very top. Hell, I'll even put the link right here so you can get to it quicker. If you're feeling extra motivated, visit the dev's page and post a comment telling them how great of a job they did and give them that extra validation to let them know "Hey! You're pretty good at what you do! You should keep doing the thing!". I didn't see where you could donate to them, but assuming I just missed it, remember that monetary validation is always helpful as well.

That's all from me though! Drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!

There are a couple endings that are related to the achievements for this game, so I will mostly go through the good endings and briefly mention anything that might help with the lore of this game.

The story starts out with you in class after having two all nighters and barely staying awake. You tough it out and stay awake- either by getting something from the vending machine or through willpower. After that, you go home and attempt to flop on your bed to sleep, only to land on what looks like a strange person. He introduces himself as Vance, and when you touch him... your sanity feels as if it's slowly dropping. Regardless of if you continue to pet him, eventually, you stop to prevent yourself from going insane and he gets angry. Vance attempts to make you continue to touch him, he cries happy that you can finally see him.

From there, there are a couple of endings. Bad endings generally occur when you run out of sanity. I'll go over the two good endings since they describe mostly what is going on, but there is a walkthrough with all the endings and achievements that you can find here. There's also one other ending that helps to explain it, so I will try to explain that ending too.

For one of the endings, you run into the broom closet only to have Vance appear inside and hug you. Trying not to lose all of your sanity, you punch him, however he pins you onto the floor. Vance ends up kissing you with blood in your mouth. Eventually Vance gives in, promising to stay away from you, and Vance talks about how romantic it is to have a piece of you inside of him and vice versa. Calling this romantic, will lead Vance to admit that he didn't mean to hurt the you and that he didn't mind getting roughed up. Vance is incredibly happy to finally be with you. After getting a kiss, you go to sleep, with Vance disappearing, leaving a heart behind.

Another ending, you end up successfully running away, and goes to buy a hotdog because you're starving. At the park, Vance comes to greet you, though staying far away from you. You mention that you haven't slept in two days. Vance states that he's aware of this and he explains the situation a bit better. Vance and you seem to be in different realms of reality (so to speak), and that because of you insomnia, you are able to see him (but no one else can). After a hug, he leaves and you go to sleep, with him disappearing.

In the final ending, you are able to lock Vance in the closet and question him. Vance explains that he and you are on different planes of reality, living in the same space. While Vance can always see you, you can never see him unless you're sleep deprived and Vance always longs to touch you and get close to you since he loves you so much. Vance talks about how it is his fault, and how he understands why you can't trust him. After sleeping, Vance is gone.

There is an extra end credit scene months after the encounter where you end up falling asleep in class. You see what seems to be Vance inside of a flowery meadow. After a brief talk, and a reassurance from Vance that you will see him again. A student wakes you up before you go back to your dorm. You try to make sense of realities. Starting with parallel lines where they would never meet, moving onto the idea of tangent lines - only seen once and never again, something that you find sad before hoping and looking at a sine function (I don't remember the name of it, I'm not a math student lol) believing that they will meet again in the future.

The Science of Staying Awake is honestly really cool in concept. Putting aside my love for pathetic yanderes, the idea of a yandere that is in a different plane of existence, always watching the person you love but never being able to interact with them is very tragic concept, and once you finally are able to see him and hold him, it just causes you to go insane. I really do think that its a unique concept that was explored. Watching how this seemingly pathetic and whimpering yandere actually causes your sanity to go down is pretty terrifying all things considered, especially since it's not always easy to escape. The end credit gives hope to the two seeing each other again, and the way you use math concepts to talk about how you and Vance are able to see each other is pretty meaningful (at least to me), though it is less of science and more of math, but I guess the Math of Staying Awake doesn't really roll off the tongue the way the Science of Staying Awake does.

Anyways, speaking of pathetic yanderes (because I have to continue my propaganda of people making sad whimpering yanderes for me, obviously), Vance is really cute in the way that he acts, wanting to be pet and held, even at the scary expense of causing your sanity to drop, so desperate to finally be able to have you touch him. Even in bad endings, he seems remorseful, not wanting you to die or causing you pain, but so desperate that he wanted to touch you that he ends up killing you instead (whether intentionally or not). Scary but also a whiny guy, so very cool and cute. In one of the newer endings, Vance promises to leave but only if you eat a piece of him. Eating it will make him leave, but the feeling of him never goes away. If the MC refuses, then they will simply eat them instead. It's pretty interesting just how much Vance wants to be a part of us. How lovely.

I like the idea of having a bar for sanity and awakeness (though I guess awakeness doesn't really do a whole ton? Maybe I missed something, haha) and the different unused endings and different endings are neat too. I think actually that awakeness will affect if the MC can see Vance still since that's how they're able to view it initially.