Oct 4, 2016
Have a throwback moment #ilovedschool #trapperkeepers #mead #oldschool
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Have a throwback moment #ilovedschool #trapperkeepers #mead #oldschool
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The Return of the Un
Glorious citizens of the DPRK! Interloping Western idiots! You can cease pounding your chests and weeping openly in the streets - I have returned to answer your letters and share my wisdom. You can thank my idiot manservant, Jeff, for my prolonged hiatus - he lost the keys to my hydroplane, failed to have my Garfield and Friends underwear pressed, and forgot all the passwords to my internet accounts. Don't worry - he was amply punished for his insolence and idiocy: he "volunteered" to be our first test subject in my new, top-secret science program titled "Operation: What Does This Do to Humans?" I'll be sure to yell at him for depriving you of my musings once he stops glowing and drooling. LOLZ! :D
So many glorious accomplishments to talk about ... our many successful rocket launches ... the unicorns I've been riding for years while the rest of you thought they only existed in Rainbow Brite cartoons and Trapper Keepers ... my 12th annual crowning as Sexiest Man Alive. 2012 was truly the year of the Un, but 2013 will be the 2nd Year of the Un (Year of the Un: Redux) - sequels are always better than the original.