#trans!janus

"Um. Virgil punched another student," Roman said again. "I mean, between you and me, I think he had it coming because he's been a, uh, bit of bully to literally everyone here, and I do mean everyone-"

Logan sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Roman-"

"No, it's okay, he didn't, like, draw blood or anything, the principal already called the other kid's parents, no fire there, everything is totally fine in that area, um, Virgil was pretty upset at first-"

"Obviously, he punched someone," Logan rolled his eyes. "Do you know why?"

"Uh, yes. So I was giving the kids back their trinket dishes we've been working on so they could check them over, make sure they didn't want to change anything and one of the kids saw that Virgil's had 'Artemis' written in it and he asked about it, then Virgil told him it was a gift for her. The other kid then told him that Artemis and all the other gods weren't real and called him and you and Janus stupid. And said that you lied to him, so Virgil punched him."

Logan sighed. "Okay, well, I just got off and I'm coming to pick him up now. Is he okay?"

"Oh yeah," Roman assured. "We went to one of the Calm Spaces talked for a little while once he felt ready to do that, um. Frankly, I didn't understand it all, um... Apparently the dish is because he wants to ask Artemis for a brother? Which...I-I don't know. But just so you have that heads up because, like, I don't know...what all he knows, um. But I guess he think he was brought to you by cats? Which I thought was Freyja's thing, but he swears it's Artemis's. But, you know. There's that."

Logan groaned and massaged his forehead. "Well, thank you for taking care of him. And for giving me a heads up. I'll be there soon."

"Drive safe!" Roman chirped.

Logan hung up and for a moment sat in the car rubbing his forehead and trying to recall if Virgil had mentioned anything specifically about Artemis recently that might have caused all of this. He sighed as he turned the car on and began pulling out of the parking lot; while he'd often spoken to Virgil about the existence of the gods, he'd never once brought up that Virgil needed to do anything about it. He was only six, after all. And really what he shared was simply because of Virgil's curiosity and his not hiding his beliefs from him.

Sure, Logan has his own little alter in the apartment where he placed offerings and whatnot, but aside from Virgil asking if he could give dandelions to whichever deity he happened to remember the name of that day, he'd never brought up the idea to him.

He shook his head as his hand drifted to the necklace tucked into his shirt and briefly closed around the snake pendant there, half wondering if this was Loki's idea on getting him to learn to embrace chaos.

---

"Hey, munchkin," Roman crouched beside Virgil. "Dad's on his way now. Are you sure you don't want me to put your dish up somewhere safe?"

Virgil shook his head and continued to hold the packed trinket dish to his chest with one arm while he munched on his apple slices with the other. "No thanks."

Roman nodded. "Alright. The rest of the kids are going to move to the library after this for games and reading. Do you want to go with them or hang out with me till Dad gets here?"

Virgil paused. "I think I wanna stay with you today."

"That's totally okay," Roman assured and ruffled Virgil's hair. "I'm going to finish wrapping up everyone's dishes, okay?" He slid onto the bench across from Virgil and set to work.

"Uncle Roman?"

"Yeah, stormcloud?" Roman half glanced up from the dish he was folding up in newspaper.

"Do babies really not come from cats?"

Roman let out a breath. "Uh, well, honestly...babies come to their parents in a lot of different ways. And sometimes people aren't even babies when they meet the family that's going to raise them."

"Really?" Virgil questioned, clearly surprised.

"Well, sure," Roman shrugged. "Batman adopted Robin when he was eight years old. That's two whole years older than you are now!"

"I know Bruce Wayne is Batman, Uncle Roman," Virgil rolled his eyes.

"You're right. Bruce Wayne adopted Dick Grayson when he was eight years old," Roman snickered. He double checked the name carved into the bottom of the dish before taping it off and writing the name on the paper while Virgil munched thoughtfully on his apples.

"Uncle Roman?"

"Yes, Virgil?"

"You have a mom, right?"

"Yeah, buddy. Your dad is my brother so we have the same mom, remember?"

Virgil squinted at the wall. "And Bobby has a mom."

Roman froze, hand mid air as he reached for another dish, dreading where the conversation was going. "Yeah, that's right."

"And moms are where babies come from."

"...More or less," Roman agreed, willing Logan to come pick up his kid and put him out of his misery already. "Usually, yeah. Something like that."

Virgil nodded, apparently pleased with this confirmation. "I thought so," he said and took a bite from his last apple slice.

Roman blinked. "Is that...it?"

"Mh-mn," Virgil nodded.

"O-okay. Um. Glad I could clear that up for you."

---

"Hey, gremlin, your dad is here," Roman announced.

Virgil glanced up from his color page and squinted at Roman. "You told him not get me in trouble on the phone, right?"

Roman snickered. "Yes, I told him that everything was taken care of and not to worry about that, and you know not to punch people anymore, right?"

"Yeah," Virgil sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Okay, let's head up front to meet your dad."

---

"Hey, sunshine," Logan greeted his child, who came barreling into him, and kissed the top of his head. "You okay?"

"Uh-huh. Uncle Roman helped me feel better."

"I'm glad he was there to help you. Do you have all your stuff?"

"Uh-huh. Can Uncle Roman come home with us? I wanna show him where my stuff dish for Artemis is gonna go."

"I know you're excited about that, but I don't think Uncle Roman is done working yet."

"But school is all done and he's a teacher," Virgil objected.

"You're right, school is over now. But you stayed after school for a little while, right? Well, teachers usually have to stay even more after school to make sure everything is ready for the next day," Logan explained.

"That's boring and tired," Virgil announced.

"You're right, it is," Roman agreed and ruffled Virgil's hair. "I'll come over later and see it. Besides you still have your bobby to share it with, remember?"

"Oh yeah! We gotta go, Daddy! Bye, Uncle Roman!"

"I'll see you tomorrow, Virge." Roman clapped Logan on the shoulder. "Good luck."

---

Logan hoisted Virgil onto his hip in front of the long shelf that functioned as his covert alter and Virgil gently set down the trinket dish.

"What do you think? Do you like it there?"

Virgil nodded. "Do you think Lady Artemis will like it too?"

"Y'know, sweetheart, I have found that when we give gifts thoughtfully and sincerely, that makes the gods happier than anything. I'm sure she'll love it." He kissed Virgil's cheek and set him on the ground again. "Is it okay if I ask what made you want to give her a gift specifically?"

"Well, you told me that she likes cats and they're her hunting helpers and Bobby said that cats brought me here and I thought that maybe they were her hunter helpers that found me as a baby and brought me here cause you said she likes babies too and tries to help them too. So I wanted to make her a special gift so maybe next time she found a baby her hunter cats could bring him here too and I could have a brother. Like a trade."

Logan blinked. "Bobby said what?"

"He said that cats brought me here and that's why people say 'look what the cat dragged in' cause cats dragged me in and it was so surprising that people started saying it about other people too."

"Oookay..." Logan rubbed his face, briefly pushing his glasses up onto his forehead. He let out a breath and readjusted the frames. "I see why Uncle Roman was confused now. Um. I...will let you know when Bobby comes home so you can show him your dish, because I know that's very important to you. Um. But for now....I- You can play in your room for a little while and after you show Bobby your dish and tell him how special it is we can work on your homework. Sound good?"

Virgil squinted up at his dad. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure. But I probably will talk to Bobby for a little while first because, um, I'm also confused about something and I think he can help me be...less confused. I hope. Um." He rubbed his forehead. "Yeah, I- Hoo... I have so many questions for your bobby. But I will absolutely make sure that you get to talk to him. Okay?"

Virgil continued to squint suspiciously, but nodded. "Okay, if you say so."

---

"Hey, Janus-"

"Oh hey, babe!" Janus smiled brightly to be greeted at the door by his husband and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Hi," Logan smiled patiently. "I- I love you, I do. I love you so much and I recognize that you just got home and, um, you work in a pharmacy and that- that's a customer service job and I get that, but I-I need to ask you something."

Janus frowned. "Yeah, what's wrong?"

"Did you tell Virgil he was delivered to us by cats?"

Janus's eyes went wide. "Ah." He scratched behind one ear. "I...may have said something similar. Yeah. Why?"

"I'm going to show you something and in a few minutes when I bring Virgil in you are going to pretend not to have seen this." He carefully pulled the dish from the shelf and held it up, pointing at the name carved into the center. "This is a trinket dish Virgil made in after school. He made it for Lady Artemis as an offering so her cats, which he assumed brought him here because of what you told him, would bring him a brother."

"Whoops."

"Cats, Janus?" Logan demanded and replaced the dish. "Couldn't you have at least gone with something traditional like storks?"

"Would that actually be less upsetting to you?"

"I don't know at this point, honestly. All I know is that Virgil punched a kid today because he was explaining why he made that for Lady Artemis to Roman and some kid told him she wasn't real and Virgil was stupid and I was lying to him."

"...I don't know how you want me to respond to that." Janus grimaced.

Logan rolled his eyes. "We are not encouraging violence, Janus."

"I'm just saying, I bet the kid's gonna leave him alone now. And I mean, you've said yourself even Aphrodite is a war goddess."

"Janus..." Logan sighed and rubbed his forehead.

"Okay, I'm sorry," he held up his hands. "How can I fix this?"

"We have to tell him the truth," Logan shrugged. "We were always going to have to tell him, I just...wish you hadn't told him something that ridiculous."

"I panicked! And then I kind of assumed he'd forget."

Logan arched a brow. "It's Virgil."

"Yeah, I should have known better," Janus admitted. "I am sorry."

"I know," Logan sighed. "I just- cats? Really?"

"You're not going to let that go, are you?"

"No. I'm not. It's so out of pocket!"

"You're literally a polytheist and there are literally two goddess you've talked about being over similar domains of fertility and childbirth with cats for their sacred animals, I don't think it's that far out there," Janus deadpanned. "I realize that's not a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice."

"You're lucky I love you," Logan grumbled.

Janus snaked his arms around Logan's shoulders. "How lucky?" He asked coyly and stole a kiss.

Logan smiled and slid his arms around Janus's waist, pulling him slightly closer. "You really think you can cute your way out of this?"

"I mean, it's worth a try, right?"

"I don't think it is," Logan shook his head. He kissed Janus again anyway. "We need to figure out how we're going to explain this."

"I mean, he knows what adoption is. Remus took care of that by rewatching Batman the Animated Series with him. We can just use that. He doesn't exactly need to know about the surrogate thing right now, does he?"

"We can't lie to him again, Janus," Logan answered. "That wouldn't be fair to him. What would we tell him later? That we lied about adopting him because it was the easier than explaining the truth when he was lied to?"

"I guess you're right," Janus murmured and pulled his arms back, folding them over his stomach.

Logan sighed and slid his hands up to Janus' biceps. "We don't have to explain your medical history to him, but…I do think we need to tell him the truth about using a surrogate. Better that then having to rehash all this when he's older. He may not appreciate our honesty now, but he will when he's older."

Janus nodded and rubbed his face. "You're right. I know you're I just…"

"It hurts," Logan filled in. "I know. It's okay if you don't feel up to being in on the conversation-"

"No. No, I was the one who lied to him, I should be the one to talk to him."

Logan gently took Janus by the face and kissed his forehead. "I'll be with you the whole time."

—

Janus knocked on the door frame to Virgil room. "Hey, sweetheart, Daddy said you had something you wanted to show me."

"Bobby!" Virgil popped up from his pile of legos and ran with open arms to his bobby.

Janus smiled and scooped him up, kissing his cheek. "Hello, little love. Did you have a good day at school?"

"Well, I did during school time. After school time I got in trouble for hitting," Virgil admitted.

Janus held back a snicker. "I appreciate your honesty. Daddy let my know one the other students had said some pretty mean things to you."

"Yeah. It made the angry feeling too big and it came out my arm."

"The angry feelings tend to do that," Janus nodded sagely.

"Yeah, they almost came out of my mouth too cause I wanted to call him mean names back, but instead it came out of my eyes and made me cry."

"I want to call people mean names when they hurt my feelings too. I'm proud of you for not doing that. It can be really hard to do."

"Yeah," Virgil sighed heavily, sound far too world weary for his six years. "Specially when the mean names are true."

This time Janus did snort. "Honey-"

"It's true!" Virgil objected.

"I know, sweetie. I didn't mean to laugh, I'm sorry. Would you like to show me what you made now?"

"Yeah!" Virgil quickly squirmed out of Janus’s arms and dragged him by the hand to the little altar. "It's up there!" He pointed then held up his arms. "Can you help me reach?"

Janus snickered and picked him up again, standing close to the shelf for Virgil to reach. Once he'd pulled the little dish from its place Janus carried Virgil to the couch and sat with the boy on his lap next to Logan. "Alright, tell me aaaalll about it."

"It's a stuff dish. We made them out of clay that didn't need to be cooked cause the school doesn't have a clay oven thing. I painted mine so it looks like stars for Artemis so her could maybe bring me a brother with her hunter cats. That's why her name is on the inside so she knows it's for her. Does that make sense? Daddy and Uncle Roman said they were confused when I told them."

"You know, sweetie, I think it's my fault they got confused," Janus told him.

Virgil's little face scrunched in confused. "You didn't even tell them things."

"No, but I told you something. Remember when you asked where you came from and I told you cats dragged you here?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well…that…wasn't really true. It wasn't fair of me to lie to you and I am very sorry I did, Virgil. I wasn't expecting you to ask about how you came to us and I panicked a little."

"But how did you find me then?" Virgil asked curiously, apparently unbothered by Janus's admission.

Logan squeezed Janus’s hand.

"Your Aunt Minerva helped," Janus told him. "You remember when your cousin Emile was born and Aunt Minerva's tummy grew and Daddy explained that babies grow inside some people till they're ready to be born? Well, Daddy and I can't really do that. So we went to the doctor's and they took some special cells from me and Daddy and made sure they were safe in Aunt Minerva's body and then when you were ready to be born we all went to the hospital together and you came home to live with us."

"Ohhh. Does that mean hers is my mommy and my auntie?"

"There is a special word for when someone helps a couple have a baby called a surrogate mother," Logan explained. "But she's not exactly your mommy."

"So it wasn't hunter cats?"

"No, sweetheart."

"Oh. Does that mean Artemis isn't my mommy either?"

Logan blinked in confusion. "What?"

"Uncle Roman says babies come from moms and if I didn't really come from Lady Artemis with her hunter cats that makes her not my mommy."

"Not-" Logan sighed. "She didn't literally send you to us with her cats, but I do believe she heard me praying for a baby and maybe she helped make sure that you grew safely and were born safely. She may not be your mom in a literal sense, but it's okay if you think of her like a mom."

Virgil nodded sagely. "I like that idea. Do you think she could send me a brother the regular way still?"

"I think that's probably something your bobby and I need to talk about first. We want to make sure we can take care of you and any other kids we might have. It doesn't usually happen really fast. I don't want you to think that just because you don't get a brother right away that that means Lady Artemis didn't like your gift, alright? I'm sure she likes it very much, this type of thing just takes a long time."

Virgil nodded. "That makes sense," he said seriously. "It took a long time for Emi to be borned. Do you think she could send me a hunter cat instead? Or maybe just a regular cat?"

Logan coughed a little to hide his laughed. "It never hurts to ask."

"I'm gonna go draw picture of the hunter cats so I can ask for one," Virgil decided and squiggled off of Janus’s lap then scampered off.

"I'm incredibly proud of you," Logan said once they were alone, squeezing both of Janus’s hands tightly.

Janus mustered up a smile for him. "Thanks."

"Are you okay?"

After seeing the dog several more times, young Virgil had finally made the connection that the animal wasn't a magical death omen, but rather a soul animal. He'd named her after his favorite spell but still kept his distance. The black eyes sparkling from within the dark black fur were still scary, even if they didn't mean death.

On his 11th birthday, he got his letter to Ilvermorny. Virgil sat on the swingset in the backyard after the birthday party guests had left, staring at the sheet of paper. He'd known it was coming, his whole family was Magic and despite his older brother's teasing, he knew he wasn't no-maj. Nox loped around from the front yard, sitting next to him and letting the frightened boy bury his hands and face in her soft inky fur. Virgil didn’t want to say goodbye to the other kids at school, how would he make new friends? What if he wasn't good in class? What if he couldn't do any magic? What if none of the houses wanted him?

Nox whined softly, reminding him of the present. Maybe having a grim as a magical soul pet wasn't such a bad thing. But would she be allowed at school if he needed her?

Logan was a serious young man. He didn't quite accept the stories of soul animals that only you and your soulmate could see. For starters, no one could show him theirs. All of his scientific research couldn't explain selective invisibility. And the concept of soulmates was another problem altogether.

His unwavering faith in science took a serious hit when Nova showed up. The large black dog was beautiful, but when he tried to show his parents and ask to adopt her, they just stared right through her as if she wasn't the most obvious thing in the front yard. His mom was quick to assume Nova was a soul animal. Logan protested but as no one else could see her, he had to concede the point.

The second blow to his faith in science came from a strange letter received on his 11th birthday, months before he was to finally enter middle school.  Ilvermorny didn't even look like a word, much less the name of a prestigious-

Magic school? Impossible.

Nova showed up that evening, nosing the letter excitedly as Logan attempted to research the school online. Somehow it had 0 results and the poor boy was very frustrated.

Two days later a strange woman showed up at their home, explaining that Logan was a wizard born of No-maj parents. Logan was nervous as the adults spoke about particulars of the school, but Nova was there to offer comfort.

"Can I bring, Nova?" He asked the woman.

"Who’s Nova?" She asked with a kind smile.

"Oh, his soul animal. I'm sure she won't be a problem, right?" Logan's mom replied brightly.

"Oh yes, Nova won't cause any problems, and perhaps her other owner will be there too? Generally, we can't really keep soul animals out; they manage to find ways in even the few times we tried to use magical deterrents. Just so long as Nova doesn't distract from your studies."

"Nothing ever distracts me from the pursuit of knowledge," Logan replied, chin in the air, scratching Nova behind her ear.

Janus and Virgil made the trip to school together at the end of the summer. Janus was petting the invisible rat on his shoulder and Virgil wished more than anything that Nox had shown up. Maybe his soulmate needed her more today. He hoped that wasn't the case because he was terrified and didn't want his soulmate to be feeling worse .

Janus looked over and gave Virgil a sympathetic smile. This year would be a first for both of them. No one but Janus’ closest friends at school knew him by that name yet and this would be his first year after social transition. Virgil knew it would be rough for both of them, but his older brother at least had friends there who would be supportive.

Virgil had Janus and Nox, and Nox didn't even show up for his first day.

Logan was so grateful that Nova was snuggling into him as his parents drove him to this mystical wizard school. Everything about the situation defied logic. None of the textbooks he had to get made sense, he couldn't find their destination on any map or see this "castle" as it had been described no matter how close they got. And a seemingly invisible large black dog was licking his cheek as he pet her to calm his nerves.

All of a sudden, they found a long line of cars on the mountain road. Peering ahead, it appeared the cars were filled with other students of the school. Another car pulled up behind them in the slow-moving line and Nova sat up to look out the window. She barked, but only Logan could hear her.

Virgil looked up as they hit the line of cars dropping off students. He was curious who else would be at school with them for the semester. He saw a black dog looking out the back window of the car in front of them, barking while a boy about his age tried to calm it down.

"Aww that dog looks like Nox"

"What dog?" Janus asked in confusion.

"In the car in front of us?" Virgil pointed, only to see that the dog was no longer in view, "oh never mind. I'll point them out when we get there."

"Okay, twerp," Janus rolled his eyes, inching the car forward.

All of the new students were herded into a separate room for the sorting. Virgil had long lost sight of the boy with the black dog. He felt crowded by all the other new students and kept getting bumped into. He felt like he would be sick all over the floor.

Before he knew what was happening, they were all being herded into the hall where older students were already sectioned off by house. One by one they were each called up to be chosen by the animal mascots of each house.

A boy named Roman was quickly chosen by the Thunderbird's flapping wings, smiling broadly. Another boy named Patton was chosen by the Pukwudgie raising its arrow. Logan was called forward, uncertain what any of these houses stood for. He saw Nova standing in the shadows and put on a brave face. The Horned Serpent's crystal started glowing almost immediately and he went to stand with other new students who had been sorted into that house.

Virgil watched as other students were sorted. He recognized Logan as the boy with the black dog and watched him join Janus in the Horned Serpent house. His heart was beating fast as his own name was called. Please just let one house want him. He stepped up to the Gordian Knot. The moment felt agonizingly long but the Wampus broke out into a roar, startling him and causing him to jump back. Virgil caught a glimpse of Nox in the shadows and smiled, glad she'd been there to see him sorted as he walked to the other new Wampus house students.

The first semester went quickly. Logan was diligent with his studies and excelled in most of his classes. He'd managed to make acquaintances with others in his house as well as other houses. Nova always seemed to know when he needed her most to show up but she often disappeared when he otherwise wanted her around.

Soon, he was studying for finals before Thanksgiving break. He decided to take a break by walking around the courtyard when he saw something curious.

Nova was snuggled up with another student who looked stressed beyond belief, burying their face in her fur as they both sat underneath a tree covered with gorgeous red and golden leaves.

Logan blinked, reassuring himself that yes, that was Nova. He walked up to the other student and cleared his throat gently.

"Hello, can you see Nova as well?"

The other boy looked up, "who's Nova?" The dark bags under his eyes were frightening, almost the same shade as the dog's fur.

"Nova is my soul animal. She's a large black dog who you are currently hanging onto," Logan replied.

"This is Nox. Can you see Nox? She's my soul animal…" the boy looked suspicious. Logan sat down next to him and reached a hand out to pet Nova.

"Are you having trouble with finals?" Logan asked, petting the dog as Virgil stared in disbelief.

"Yeah, how did you-?"

"I find that Nova shows up when I'm most stressed out and in need of comfort. I was surprised that she wasn't around for finals prep, perhaps that's because she's been here for you instead," Logan looked to Virgil with a small smile, "my name is Logan. I'm in the Horned Serpents. What's your name?"

"Ah, Virgil. Wampus House. And yeah, Nox has been around a lot this week. No one else has been able to see her before though," he replied, the hint of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

"Perhaps that's because she's our soul animal, making us soulmates," Logan replied in a matter-of-fact tone despite his racing heart.

"You think so?" Virgil asked with a hopeful tone.

"Yes. She's good for comfort, but would you like help to prepare for finals, Virgil?"

"Yes please," Virgil stood and offered Logan a hand up, "yeah, thanks, Logan."

Jan is a trans guy

Remus is Jan's best friend since probably really early

Jan got his facial scar really young and when Re first asked about it he lied and said it was from a house fire* When Re learned about Jan being a guy he was all for it and had a Name-Day Party

Re constantly calls Jan cute masc things ("handsome man" "cute pretty baby boy" "my manly man")* They aren't a couple but a lot of people assume

Jan used to bind with Ace bandages and the second Re learned about it he freaked and bought Jan a real binder and they spent two hours online learning how to bind safely

Jan's parents are a mix of personalities... as in, his dad is really really really bad and his mom is never there, but supports them financially

Jan always says he's clumsy as the reason for his bruises and scrapes, but lies just enough to make it seem like, if Re looks hard enough, he just has an abusive partner, when really it's his dad

Jan complains in private to Re about his parents, but never actually says anything revealing

Re hates Jan's fake boyfriend with a passion and is constantly telling Jan to leave him

When Jan was just starting high school, he starts getting really sick, and he denies any possible explanation for a long time before he realizes one day that he has a bump on his stomach

He calls Re in tears after taking one of his mother's at home pregnancy tests and tells him that he thinks he's pregnant

Re immediately takes him and comforts him and offers to take him to a PP nearby to get a test and figure out what to do

Jan already know he can't keep a baby because... everything, especially his at home life

When they get to the PP, there are protesters and when they see the two male-presenting people, the gay insults and the accusations of supporting child murder come

Jan pretends to ignore them while Re keeps them walking, Jan holding tight to his shirt

The second they get inside Jan can't hold back the tears

Re takes care of all the talking up until Jan has to answer questions but Jan just answers quietly, says that Re isn't the father, that he didn't want to be pregnant, that it wasn't consensual, that he isn't capable of taking care of or holding a child to term

It's already just after the first trimester because of how long he denied it, but they manage it

The PP people are super nice and comforting and helpful and Jan cries again inside

Afterwards, Re keeps Jan at his place for a few days, takes care of him, while Jan turns his phone off to ignore any calls or texts

At school, nobody knows Jan is trans

He's seen as some stuck up dude who thinks he's so cool because of his scar and his attitude and his good grades

The teachers are all meh about him because he has great grades but not the best attitude

It's an ingrained thing at this point, to reply to hurt with snark and anger and insults* He and Remus, since they're best friends, are always together and they're considered to be the Asshole Duo, the Rejects, the Hotties That Are Actually Dicks, while Roman, Re's twin, is the King of the school, popular with all the cliques and shit

Jan hates Roman because he's jealous of how he seems so comfortable in his body, how he's loved by everyone, and every time they cross paths Jan insults him and Ro insults him back and it always devolves into fights that leaves the both with tight chests and bruises and almost in tears but neither ever win because they get pulled apart by teachers

Re loves watching Ro get beat the shit out of by his super strong in every way trans man best friend and tells Jan such every chance he gets

Patton, who's friends with Ro, never gets into the fights but is always on the sidelines, pleading with them to stop

On the other hand, Logan, who is also friends with Ro, will gladly fight a bitch, just not over stupid insults that Ro could honestly deal better with

But Logan will absolutley get into huge debates with Jan that devolve into fist fights

Neither ever gets mad at each other but the fights always end with detention for both

Jan likes Lo, sort of, it's complicated, but they sort of compliment each other

Like seriously, one time Lo said Jan's hat went well with his jacket, Jan nearly cried but instead he told Lo that his tie was stupid

Lo just rolled his eyes because he understood that it was a lie but also that it was a habit, a defense mechanism, and that is the reason he doesn't get involved in the spats between Ro and Jan

Pat compliments Jan all the time whenever Ro isn't around, but when Ro is, Pat will wave to Jan with a huge smile and Jan nearly dies inside every time

Jan tried to insult Pat once and Pat cried and Jan cried and apologized and never did it again

When Virgil first moves into town, Jan doesn't think anything of him

V isn't much of anything other than height and dark makeup and way too big sweaters

But the second V opens his mouth to insult Ro on his too bright, clashing outfit in front of the entire class, Jan decides V is alright

Re is the one to befriend V

He invites V over to study with them on a weekend when Jan is hiding away from his dad

V is chilling and studying all the way until Re starts complaining about how stupid Roman is and V chuckles and Re grins and starts really going off

Then Jan joins in and then V joins in and it keeps going until they're all laughing and then

V just coughs and excuses himself to the bathroom

And when he comes back

He has a chest under that giant sweater

Jan doesn't mean to stare but when V points it out he sort of shrinks into himself a bit before he pulls up some courage

And asks how V got his chest so small, since his binder didn't make his chest that flat

And V realizes that OH

Jan is trans too

And Re makes a comment about having to get Jan a new binder soon because it's been a while

So V recommends the binder company he uses

And thus the friendship begins

When they all start going to school together, Ro calls them the Darks

Because Ro, Lo, and Pat are the Lighta

But most call them the Others

They make a mean insult team against Ro

Pat hangs out with them at lunch sometimes when Ro is at rehearsals and Lo is at debate club

He's super sweet and V thinks he's cute and tells Pat that and Pat gets all blushy and red and says they're all super cute together too

Jan dies inside at how nice Pat is

And accidentally blurts it out

"Why are you so nice to us?"* He tries to cover it up

"We're all dicks to Roman, and he's your best friend. Doesn't that say something about you?"

Pat gets kind of quiet

"Everyone deserves to have friends, kiddo"

And then Re asks if Pat wants to go out to lunch on a weekend with them all sometime

And Pat agrees wholeheartedly

At that lunch, they learn that Pat is actually genderfluid and usually uses they/them pronouns

And Pat asks V for makeup tips

And they all end up at Re's house doing makeup on each other and V offers to try and cover up Jan's facial scar

And at first he's hesitant but when he sees the result it reminds him of what he could have looked like

If he had a good home life

And he end sup crying and ruining the makeup and Re comforts him

And Pat and V are nice but then V accidentally wonders out loud where the scar came from

So Jan says a house fire

But it's quiet and a lie and even Pat can tell at this point

And Re has this realization

That Jan didn't get that scar in a house fire

So where did he get it?

But no one calls him out

Nearly a year after starting highschool, Jan has two new friends* And then he starts missing school

Just a day or two at first

Then a few* Then its weeks at a time where Jan is gone and doesn't answer his phone

And Re gets worried

And so does V and Pat

And then Jan doesn't come to school for a month and Re breaks and tells Pat and V about Jan's boyfriend who's abusive* But

But but but

V suggests going to Jan's home to see if he's there

Maybe they can help

If he isn't, they can ask his parents, see if they knew where Jan's boyfriend is, if Jan is with him, if he's okay

Re has to search through months of texts to try and remember where Jan lives

But when he finds it they all go, prepared to deal with a Jan who's in an abusive relationship, armed with dozens of internet tabs of information on how to help a friend in one, how to get them to realize "it's not fine, it's not okay", wondering if the guy is isolating Jan, if he's keeping him away from friends, from family, from everything

And V is the one to knock on the door of the house

The man who answers has bloodied knuckles and is pissed off and V has to steady himself before he speaks

"We're here to talk to Janus"

"Who the fuck is Janus"

And V nearly dies inside

They didn't know if Jan's parents knew about him being trans

They had never asked

Re is the one to speak up after that

"Dee? Is she here? We're worried about her-"

V cringes at the pronouns, at the name he hadn't ever known, hadn't wanted to, but it's frozen solid when he sees the man's face go dark, cold, empty

"There is no Dee here. Get the hell off my property before I call the cops"

V steps up, holds the door

"Wait, no, sorry if this is rude, but it's kind of obvious that you're lying, you know. Dee hasn't been to school in a month, you should be worried about us calling the police."

And the second the guy shoves V out and screams at them and slams the door is the second V catches a glimpse of his knuckles and the back of the house, a couch, a wall, a person-

Jan, hands over his mouth, bloody and terrified, shaking, eyes locked with V just before the door slams closed, cowering on the couch

V stands there on the top step for a long time, in shock

Jan was lying

He had lied about a boyfriend

About his homelife* And he was terrified and hurt and /right there/

Re touches V's shoulder and V turns to them, eyes wide, as he pulls them away, unsure, and whispers to them what he saw

Pat cries

Re almost cries but just stands there

V is the one to call the police

It takes twenty minutes for the first cop car to pull up

Half an hour after that, that man is in cuffs, in a cop car, being hauled off to jail, and an ambulance is pulling away, Jan inside, and none of the kids know what to do

V is stuck there, the sight of Jan in that house, being carted away on a stretcher, going through his mind, over and over again

The police take their statements

They leave for the hospital

V calls his dad

Pat calls his parents

Re calls Roman uncharacteristically, crying, and Roman, uncharacteristically, comes right away to comfort him, confused and worried, but knowing that if it got his brother, crying, to call him of all people, then it was far more important than whatever petty grudge they have between them

Logan is with him because Pat had called him, and he's stoic, but his brow is furrowed as he talks to Patton in the corner in whispers

Slowly, the parents get there

And then, out of nowhere, a woman, flowing dress and an empty expression walks up to the desk and asks for Deanne Crow

And Re looks up

And immediately knows this woman is Jan's mother

He watches as she's lead away, a doctor with her, looking a bit downcast but holding up that infinitely frustrating facade of doctoral stoicism

She doesn't return

Two hours later, Re goes up to the desk and asks* Still in surgery

Eventually, they all have to leave, to go home

They come back in the morning, but there are no visitors

That rules stays that way for a week

When Remus gets a text from Jan asking for him to come visit

Alone

When Remus gets there, he's led to Jan's room

And he freezes* Because Jan is stuffed to the brim in white, and what he can see is black and blue, and there's two casts, a leg and an arm

But Jan is watching him

He sits down beside his best friend of many years, his first friend after his fight with Roman, after his parents left, and he cries

And so does Jan

Once they've calmed down, the first thing that comes out of Jan's mouth is an apology

And Remus just laughs, breaks down, and tells Jan that there's nothing, NOTHING, to apologize for

And Jan quietly explains that he's sorry for lying to Remus for so long

But Remus just reassures him that there's nothing to apologize for

It's only an hour in that Jan tells him that he had miscarried

And that's when Remus remembers

Realizes

No boyfriend

No boyfriend

Jan was pregnant, twice now

And there was no boyfriend

He nearly screams

He's going to kill someone

But right then, he just holds Jan's hand and comfort him as he breaks down, crying, because he had been further, hadn't even realized until he had been on the ground, screaming in pain after a beating that hadn't even been that bad, but his stomach had hurt so bad, so bad

And it hadn't even clicked until the nurse had mentioned it without realizing

Jan cries and Remus comforts him, because that's what he's always done

A few days later, when Jan gets his first round of bandages off for good and isn't stuck with a bedpan anymore, he asks if Remus can bring Virgil and Patton

In the end, Pat cries the whole time and V sits there as a comforting, solid presence, even though Jan doesn't mention the baby, doesn't mention his father, doesn't say anything about his abuse

The next time they visit, in a surprising turn of events, Logan and Roman are there too

It takes a few minutes, but then Jan playfully insults Roman's face, which is exhausted, he has bags under his eyes and his hair is a mess and at least two buttons on his shirt are on wrong

But instead of insulting him back, Roman starts to cry

Logan puts a hand on Roman's shoulder, Jan freezes, confused and slightly scared by the turn of events, but just as quickly Roman is scrubbing the tears away and insulting Jan's state, his stringy greasy hair and his own bags and his probably way too itchy arm and leg under the casts

And Jan can't help the smile, the relief that comes with the routine

Logan breaks it off a few minutes in to ask about his mother

And it's silent because of course Logan would be the one to ask one of those questions. He's blunt, he has a hard time with emotions, he hates pussyfooting around the point

"She works a lot" is the only answer Jan can give

"Did she visit you?"

"Every day" he answers, and there's something there, something like confusion and relief and fear and anger and love

He doesn't know how to feel about his mother finally realizing that she has a child

Or how to feel about her crying at his side, wondering out loud what she dis wrong, why she had married, why she had kept the baby, why she hadn't just aborted, why she hadn't just, why, why, why

He doesn't say that, though, because it doesn't feel like something he can voice, something he can make sense of, something he has the RIGHT to talk about out loud

"Your parents didn't know about you being a man."

"Yeah"* And that's all that he can say to that

Because what would have happened?

His father would have suddenly gotten up, realized he was bad, stopped beating him, stopped everything he was doing to apologize and support him and use the right name and pronouns?

His mother would have stopped leaving for months on end, stopped working at all hours, suddenly paid more attention to him, suddenly loved him and cared for him and doted on him?

No

So what would have been the point?

When he had took a pair of scissors to his head in third grade, he had recieved broken ribs and half his face gone

He couldn't imagine what would have happened had he admitted that he felt so wrong

Nobody asks any more probing questions for the rest of the visit

It takes a while. Weeks, months of rehabilitation, of exercising and training and relearning to walk

But eventually he's on his feet again, bruises gone and the worst of it scarring

He has a limp, has to use a cane, and his arm aches when it's cold

But he's on his feet and he's been back in school for a while now

His mother has fixed up the house, had moved work to the town, takes care of him regularly now

Roman and him still snark at each other in the halls, but it doesn't devolve into anything physical anymore

Logan still sucker punches anyone who claims the world is flat

Patton still grins at him in the halls and waves and calls his name out in classes for group projects

Remus comes over nearly every day to help him, talks to him about everything, jokes about their friends and life in general

At lunch now, they all sit together at Jan's table* Sometimes it hurts

Sometimes it sucks

People stare at him in the halls

Teachers glance at him and offer extensions

Students watch him as he forces himself to hold his back straight, to hide the limp, but he still needs the cane

Summer hits

Everyone comes over a week in and has a sleepover at his house

Virgil and Jan take off their binders, Pat gives them hand knit sweaters, Roman and Remus argue about what students would be the cutest with who, and Logan hesitantly shows them pictures of him when Patton had given him dresses and skirts to try out

They're laughing and laughing and laughing

In the morning, his mom makes breakfast and Remus sleepily hugs him and mumbles that Jan is the cutest sleepy boy he knows

And he freezes and stares at his mom, but she doesn't even hesitate

"Jan's a pretty nice name, wish I'd thought of it. Deanne is more of an old lady name, you know?"

And he breaks down crying

Its the first summer of high school and he has five friends and his mom is back and she accepts him and his dad is in jail and everything is good

He looks at all his friends, who are happy and close and loving, and his chest constricts

Two of them look at him and they smile and his lungs lose all air and he smiles back and Remus looks to him and grins

He doesn't know what it feels like to fall in love

“Lady Danielle Ekafae and her parents, Lord and Lady Ekafae” A herald announced the arrival of the last guests. Prince Roman settled his wings slightly, adjusting them to compensate for a too stiff chair. The estate who was hosting the ball had very few chairs made for the royal family and their wings. Those had gone to the King and Queen, and Crown Prince Remus. Roman knew there was another chair he could have used, but his gayness was offensive to the hosts. So he would suffer silently until the ball ended. 

“If I may, Prince Roman, I would like to request a dance with you” or not.

“Of course, my lady” He stood to honor Lady Danielle’s request. Like the perfect gentleman he was, he bowed before offering his arm. The lady giggled and took it. He swept them out to the middle of the dance floor. 

“That chair didn’t look comfortable” She remarked, eyes glittering. Curse her sharp eyes. 

“No, it wasn’t. However, a prince never complains-” He twirled her “-and my gay ass offended our hosts” 

“Well I hope Deceit strikes them soon” She took her eyes off him for the first time since the songs began. He noticed her studying the walls. 

“Usually I would say that he is a criminal and I hope he’s caught. However, because it’s you and you’d know I’m lying...I hope the same. He’s done a lot for me and my brother. Hopefully Re can come public with his marriage soon” Roman watched as for the first time all night, Danielle’s muscles relaxed. 

“Oh? Is he gay too?” She looked up at him, a small smile on her face.

“Yes. We’re twins, what did you expect? He’s married to our advisor Logan and Patton, a cook down in the kitchens. So, that’s another strike against him. Luckily, he’s good at social stuff. He also has helped marry others, who otherwise wouldn’t be able to. Our parents are trying, but the nobles aren’t budging” 

“You love him a lot. Well, I can tell you my parents are for it. They’ve accepted me since I came out” She smiled.

“Lesbian?” He dipped her, kissing her hand as he prepared to step away. She was swept away before she could answer fully. 

~~~

The rest of the party passed in a blur. Before Roman knew it, he was settling in a guest bedroom. He sighed, putting away his day clothes. He’d help wash them tomorrow, but right now he wanted to sew up a hole in his sock. As he was finishing, he heard a creak. 

“You can come in Re. I’m still up” He called softly. Instead of a door open, the window swung open of its own accord. A figure dressed all in black climbed in, making the odd event less odd. When its face turned to the prince, he saw that it was covered in snake face paint. 

“D-deceit” He stammered, scrambling backwards on the bed. Deceit just tilted his head at the prince. After studying him for a moment, the black-clad figure raised a finger to his lips and crept out of the room. Roman’s hands were shaking as he tied off his work and put his sock away. He considered going to sleep, but decided against it. Deceit occasionally left bodies in his wake and the prince’s would be quite the fuss. After an agonizingly slow hour, Deceit returned. When he noticed the prince was still awake, he once again tilted his head. 

“I wouldn’t dare hurt you, Your Highness. Besides, you have been nothing if not a leader in the fight for our rights. Sleep well, and know that you have nothing to fear” A familiar voice hissed through the painted face. Before Roman could place it, Deceit was gone. 

~~~

The next few weeks were quiet in the hunt for Deceit. After Roman reported the sighting to his parents, they stepped up the defense as well. It seemed the man had decided to lay low while the alarm was raised. 

“Ro. Why are you so distant?” Patton nudged his brother in law to startle him out of his thoughts. The Crown Prince had invited his partners and his partner to hang out in his room. Logan was busy trying to keep their husband from completely derailing a speech they were working on. 

“It’s nothing. Just thinking about what the thief told me. It still haunts me” Roman admitted after a second.

“Well, I have been looking over the records. It appears he goes after those who have been homophobic. Either behind closed doors, or openly, they all have that connection” Logan had given up trying to stop Remus, and had hidden the original copy of their work and left the other one with their husband. 

“Wait, really?” Roman straightened. 

“Indeed. and all of the murders he left a note. All of the inheriting children reported that it was a warning to not follow in their parent’s footsteps” The advisor straightened, adjusting their glasses. 

“Huh. That’s kinda neat? I guess. I know, I know. It’s rude to be glad of their deaths” Ro waved off the reprimand. Logan sighed and continued after a moment.

“Yes. Well, in an effort to prevent that, your father has compiled a list of everyone who has been against the changes. Hopefully we can prevent further crimes by our elusive friend”

“Awww, you think of me as a friend! Can you show me the list? My brain is coming up empty on who to go after next!” The group’s attention all snapped up to the top of the window. Deceit sat there, picking his nails. When they all finally took note of him, he wiggled his fingers in greeting. Remus reached for his bow. The thief clicked his tongue. 

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you. I told my associate that if I wasn’t back by dinner, to reveal your little secret. It would a shame if the crown prince was revealed to be gay and polyamourous!” Remus immediately lowered his bow and drew his partners behind him. 

“Deceit, please. Leave him alone” Roman begged as he stepped forward. 

“Only for you dear. Oh, and tell Dee I said hi. Well, Lady Danielle I suppose. He’s trans though. Goes by Janus. His parents are sweethearts. Use them to help get your reforms in place. Ta-ta” the familiarity of the voice finally snapped into place within Roman’s brain. 

“Wait, please. I’m sorry I misgendered you throughout” The figure paused. Before long, he turned around again. The forced hissing dropped. 

“You...you figured it out? I. I was so careful. Hit them regularly for a simple robbery to disguise it. How?” He sounded so vulnerable. Roman finally realized why it was so hard to pin down his voice. He was on T. Before he could think any more, he shot in the air to perch next to him. 

“Your voice. And how gentle you were when you saw me awake. When I used the right pronouns. there were a thousand little things that snapped into perspective when you mentioned yourself” He reached out a tanned hand, carefully wiping away some of the make-up around Janus’s eyes. 

“Get him bro!” Remus cackled, his bow returned to his place. Both of the perched duo went bright red at that. 

“Look my scaly friend, you don’t have to do this anymore. We’ve got it. Please, just....go live your life. i’m guessing your parents know?” Roman finally choked out, a flashy smile replacing the surprised expression. 

“Yea. They were the first to know. I told them when I was little, and they’ve done everything they could to help. They also figured out I was Deceit too. They told me as long as I wasn’t cruel, I could continue” Janus had a quiet smile on his face. Roman smiled and kissed his forehead. 

“I’ll take over the fight from here. Thank you dear, but it’s time for political battles” Roman made to move so his companion could leave. Before he could do anything though, Janus grabbed his sash and pulled him into a kiss. After a minute, Roman melted into it. They broke apart with twin gasps amidst cheers. 

“I never answered your question. I’m gay too. Sleep well Darling” He called over his shoulder, drawing out the name sweetly. 

“I’m so doomed”

“That you are Ro. Come on, we have dinner with Dad soon” Remus snapped his wings to get his brother’s attention. 

“Gimme...a sec. Gotta figure out what just happened” 

~~~

Seven long years, the new laws were welcomed in with the younger prince kissing his husband.