Towers and Trees

If I've learned one thing this year it's that there are a lot of different types of lonely. You can miss other people, you can long for one person in particular, you can even feel the space of a past version of yourself. Loneliness can occur often and suddenly and most often comes when you're least expecting it. It's a thing to weather through and mostly you're just glad when it's over. I did not know that I was lonely tonight, nor did I realize that I was homesick for Victoria. Actually I've been feeling a conspicuous absence of feelings for Victoria lately. I miss the people for sure, but the place and the memories- the distance has seemed to serve as more of a blessing than it probably should. When I went to see Towers and Trees perform at Broken City it wasn't necessarily because I knew anything about the band. The drummer was a boyfriend of a friend (a die hard fan of the band who had been trying to get me to go to their shows for ages). Admittedly I went a little bit to appease her, and to clear my own conscience for missing shows in the past. I expected to like it. I never expected to love it. The best music makes you feel. Doesn't matter who's playing it or why or who it's dedicated to. Good music wraps itself up and sits on your belly and you understand for a fraction of a second that someone else on this planet really understands you. Music is oxygen because it is, in my experience, the best guarantee possible that you are never really alone. Towers and Trees were amazing because it didn't seem like they expected to be. Their introduction was humble and understated. These are people who just love making music. But their performance gave me the best of what good live music can do. It was hearty and soul searching and fizzy and light without being shallow. The kind of experience that makes you want to curl your toes into the ground and remember what it was like to be this young and alive. That this is the point. Their performance reminded me of the best parts of the west coast. The spontaneous, laid back, easy smile sides. The friendship without expectation and the readiness to discuss deep thoughts. Spontaneity and sincerity mingled together to create unique and vulnerable truth. "We're not free but we can dance as if we are" - Towers and Trees It doesn't matter that I was lonely tonight even if I wasn't conscious of it. What matters is that I don't feel lonely anymore.