#touch fic

Soulmate marks aren’t exactly rare. One day Jacob goes on a rant about how 30% of people are not exactly rare, but it’s still a small amount that makes it so it’s difficult to find your soulmate. Or soulmates (Jacob added, and then went onto another rant about clusters or whatever). Janine didn’t listen to it.

Janine liked touching, and being touched. But she was not looking for a soulmate. It was just how she showed love. And going from having Tariq to nothing was affecting her in a way she wasn’t exactly comfortable sharing.

The second time she touches someone at work, it’s Ava. It is an accident, obviously. Ava is sitting down in Jacob’s place by Janine’s side, and she’s playfully talking to them. Well, she’s talking to Melissa and Barbara, and joking. Janine is laughing at the three of them, and Ava doesn’t mock her when she gets the chance, instead saying something funny and Janine laughs and touches her arm without even thinking about it. Ava is ready to dismiss it, but then they both look at Ava’s arm and there’s an imprint of Janine’s hand.

A golden handprint on Ava’s arm. It glows softly.

Janine feels her heart beating in her throat. She doesn’t really hear a thing. Ava says something and goes away so fast Janine can’t barely process it. In a second, though, Melissa is by her side, urging her to get up.

Janine follows Melissa. Her mind is a mess of non-stop thoughts and she doesn’t register if Melissa talks to her as they walk through the school until they find Melissa’s room. By the time Melissa’s voice puts her out of her mind she’s sitting down and Melissa is squatting in front of her, holding her hand.

“Talk to me Janine, what’s going on in your head?” Janine looks up, her eyes impossibly big. There are tears she’s holding back. Melissa looks worried. It is rare, and Janine doesn't really understand why Melissa - of all people - would be.

“She just left?” Janine says it like a question, she’s not sure what she’s trying to say exactly.

“I think she got scared” Melissa comments, Janine scoffs. Tears fall down her face. Melissa moves one of her hands from Janine’s to clean up her tears, but before she does it, she sees it. “Oh, Fuck”

Janine looks confused at Melissa, until she follows Melissa’s eyes to her arm. The imprint was starting to fade but it was impossible not to see it. Golden imprint on her skin, just like it had been on Ava's.

Janine is speechless, which is not something that usually happens to her. Not knowing what to say, having no words. And here she is, a second time during this day where she's rendered completely shocked.

"Is that possible?" Janine asks, her voice is low. Almost a whisper. Of course she knows about it, it's not unheard off. But to someone who grew up hearing that she wouldn't have a soulmate it seemed almost impossible to even engage in the idea of having more than one.

"I've never seen it either, to be honest." Melissa said, "but it makes sense." She says, more to herself than to Janine. Janine moves her hand to touch Melissa's arm. They both watch, mesmerized, by the sight of the imprint on Melissa's arm.

It seems insane, Janine knows, but it feels so good to see the mark there. But soon enough she starts to think of what it all means. There are so many stories about finding a soulmate and being happy ever after. This didn't seem like this, though. Janine knew at least this. She also knew she had no experience whatsoever.

"I, hm, I'm not sure what we're supposed to do." Janine admits it. Melissa needs to suppress a smile and a comment, because this version of Janine that whispers and voices insecurities it's not something she has ever seen.

"I think we should talk, after school. I'll make dinner, and I'll see if I can get Ava to go, ok?" Melissa says. She's a bit taken aback, but she seems confident about it all (well, she's always confident about everything) so Janine agrees with the plan. "It's going to be ok, hun, don't worry too much about it." Melissa says, and Janine tries to follow the advice. She tries not to think about the butterflies in her stomach about being called "hun". She tries not to think about Ava and Melissa. She also tries not to think about what that conversation later will be about.

Janine fails. She teaches, and she helps her students. But her focus is somewhere else. Jacob runs inside her class as soon as he can during recess.

She tells him all about it. It's easy to talk to him, she's not afraid of being judged.

"Wow, Ava AND Melissa," Jacob says, "You know, I've read articles about poly soulmates. I can send you some, here," In seconds he has his phone in his hand and the links keep coming. "So what are you going to do?" he asks, as he sends his links.

"Melissa will cook dinner, and we'll talk, I guess. Don't know if Ava will show up." Janine explains.

"Do you know how you want to do this? Are Ava and Melissa also soulmates? They must be, right?!" Jacob asks. And Janine is thankful for him, but those are the questions she's been asking herself and she hasn't come to any conclusions yet.

"I don't know." Janine answers, Jacob looks at her seriously.

"You should really think about it. I think the articles will help, though." Jacob says. "Still can't believe Melissa and Ava... Could you not choose less scary people?" Jacob asked. Janine blushed.

"They're not scary... They're just... confident." Janine tried to defend.

"They're also very hot." Jacob said, with a smile. "What? I'm gay not blind." He explained himself.

"They're both so hot." Janine admitted, and they both laughed.

Recess was over too soon, Jacob left Janine's room urging her to tell him afterwards about her "date", and telling her to read the articles. Janine tried to focus on her work for the most part. And the day was soon ending.

Janine went home. Her mind was running all the possibilities and the what-ifs. She hadn't actually considered reading before, but Jacob's articles were interesting. And at least it gave her some options to think about.

If work passed fast. Now time was going incredibly slowly. Janine found herself pacing in her apartment, ready to leave, but being too early for it.

She wondered if Ava was going to show up, and how it would be all three of them. Janine thought back on being at Melissa's, when she was teaching Janine how to cook. And how it had been surprisingly easy between them.

"You both need to tell me what you want to do about this soulmate thing; I need to know what I'm working with." Melissa says it like she's not really (fucking) anxious about their answer. There's a moment of silence.

Janine clears her throat.

" I... I've read a little about, hm, clusters. It's how they call it, groups of soulmates, I mean. Jacob sent me some articles about it. I hope you don't mind it, I kinda needed to talk to someone about it." Janine was trying really hard not to say it really fast. Melissa only gestures that she should continue talking. "I guess, what I want to say is that I wanted to take you both on a date. One on one, I mean. But also all three of us, if it's something you both want to do." To Melissa it was clear Janine had really thought about it. Ava's expression doesn't really betray much, so it's surprising when the woman says:

"We-" she points at Melissa, "haven't touched though. We don't know if we're a group?" Ava questions it. Melissa chimes in before Janine can say anything.

"I don't think it matters all that much, we're always going to be linked by Janine anyway." Ava doesn't seem to believe it, but she doesn't say anything.

"Why don't you touch?" Janine asks, innocently. She knew she wouldn't be able to keep going without knowing.

"We don't have to do it." Melissa adds it; she knows Janine's question might scare Ava away and she really doesn't want to. It doesn't matter to her how curious she is.

"I don't want to." Ava answers. It's surprisingly honest for, well, Ava. Melissa sees how Janine wants to argue, so she cuts the conversation.

"Yeah... Anyway, the dating though... I can agree with that. Does sound like a good idea."

"Yeah, well, this is not going to be an exclusive thing is it? Cause I do have a boyfriend. But I guess I could do dates." Melissa tries not to roll her eyes at Ava.

"I guess I don't really mind. We should see how it goes first right?" Janine doesn't seem very sure about it.

"Well, if this becomes something serious, we might need to talk about this boyfriend thing." Melissa warns. "But i guess this is a future conversation..."

....

Melissa gives the controller to Ava, a little smile. "I'm trusting you to choose something nice." And goes back to the kitchen, stopping first to tell Janine to go sit down.

When Melissa comes back, Janine is sitting on the couch with a blanket on her legs (her shoes are discarded in front of the couch). Ava seems like she's comfortable, even though she hasn't taken up as much space as Janine. Melissa gives Janine the popcorn and settles down by her side. She takes up space, being as close as she could be to Janine. The television is paused in the beginning of a movie. Ava presses play on what seems to be a horror movie.

It doesn't take much time for Janine to cozy up to Melissa, who lets the younger woman cuddle up to her. Ava seems to get closer too; Janine's legs crossing over Ava's.

"I don't like that movie at all." Janine complains, after another jumpscare. Both Melissa and Ava have to control themselves not to laugh too much. Janine cuddles further into the women, turning her face from the television.

It's really cute, Melissa thinks, how Janine ends up falling asleep on them. She sees Ava has also turned her face from the television and is now watching Janine. Their eyes meet.

"Listen... About us touching..." Ava starts, it is refreshing to see the principal look so... real. Melissa doesn't let her finish though.

"Ava, I meant what I said before. It doesn't make a difference to me, I'm not losing another soulmate, ok?" Melissa says without really thinking and it's out of her mouth so fast she barely registers what she said. It takes Ava a few seconds to get it. They fall into a heavy silence.

"Barbara?" Ava asks. Melissa nods. "For what's worth, I truly think it's her loss." Ava says it and then she's back looking at the television and eating popcorn.

The movie ends. If there's any awkwardness between them, Ava shakes it off by talking shit about the movie. Melissa laughs and agrees. For some time they stay like this, talking about unimportant things. Neither makes a move to wake up Janine. It turns out they don't have to, their conversation ends up waking her up.

"Good morning" Ava says, in a playful tone.

"Sorry for sleeping." Janine says, but she doesn't move and her eyes close again.

"We don't mind hon, don't apologize." Melissa says. Janine starts moving a little after.

"I do think I need to go home though." Janine says and Melissa starts getting up. Ava follows. Melissa stops Janine at the door, choosing to leave a kiss on her cheek.

"Good night to youse. Let me know when you're home." She says. Melissa waits to see both of the women leaving.

She closes the door. She still has to clean up, but she's not tired at all. Instead she feels a surge of anxious energy running through her body.

She lets herself think about Janine asleep in her arms. How right it felt. She thinks about Ava too, how they fell into easy conversation. Melissa doesn't want to be hopeful, she's already at two soulmates, she can't really let herself hope for another one. And yet, she found herself thinking this entire situation wasn't as difficult as she might've thought.

Her first thought was Janine, eyes full of tears. Then she had to think about the marks. Janine's hand on Ava's arm. Hers on Janine's. Golden imprints. Different, but the same. She tried to keep the other mark, the one she had once seen on Barbara, out of her mind. This wasn't about Barbara, and really the redhead wanted to keep those two things very apart. That's why she was currently ignoring Barbara's texts.

Then she thinks back on Ava. During recess Melissa had made her way to Ava's office. When she did not find the principal there, she walked to the other place she could think Ava would've gone too. Ava's secret bathroom.

Ava didn't look like she was doing so good. Melissa had no idea how to approach that conversation. She knew Ava, though. She knew how much of herself she saw on Ava. And when Ava saw her and there was no snarky comment or joke, Melissa knew she was about to see a side of Ava few people had been able to see.

"Listen," Melissa started saying, sitting down on the floor by Ava's side. "I don't know how you feel about that whole thing, but, hm... " Melissa's voice stopped at her throat. "I went after Janine, when you left, and I guess I'm also her soulmate." Maybe it wasn't fair to say it like that, but Melissa had always found it better to rip out the band-aid fast.

"What?" Ava seemed genuinely confused.

"I touched her arm, the imprint was there. Just like it happened to you two." Melissa explained, "Believe me, I was also surprised by it." Melissa's laugh was more nervous than anything. Before Ava could say anything though, Melissa completed, "We're having dinner at mine, tonight. You should be there, and we can talk about this. What we want to do about it." Melissa didn't dare mention the possibility of them being soulmates. She didn't dare hope it was the case. She could understand Janine having more than one soulmate, it made sense. Janine was an idealist and she didn't give up and she was bright and she cared too much. Melissa was nothing like that, and she had already been rejected by one soulmate, she didn't need another rejection to her count.

"Why would you want that?" Ava asked. Melissa looked at her, confused. "Why would you want me there, having that conversation?" Maybe Melissa should've seen it coming her way, that question. Why would she share her soulmate, right? A younger Melissa would find it weird too.

"Because you're her soulmate too.", Melissa said, as if it was obvious. "I'm not going to make her choose between us." And Melissa's voice does not falter, it's as sincere as she can be. More than she's ever been with Ava, for sure. Ava is lost in thought for a few minutes.

"I'll come then" Ava says, all confidence returning to her face. Melissa had smiled at her, then. She couldn't help, now, the insecurities. Ava was younger than her, and if she was honest she had seen the spark between Ava and Janine before. But she knew she couldn't worry too much about it. Hell, she wasn't even sure what she wanted or not with Janine.

It was a second thing she couldn't stop thinking about. Janine had been growing on her since the year before. Melissa didn't agree with her methods, or even her ways of help, but Janine was dedicated and unrelenting when it came to the kids and the school. She could (and did) admire that. And she would be lying if she said she had never thought about it, Janine was easy on the eyes.

Melissa turned to the kitchen. She was ready, and she tried to distract herself with the cooking until her phone rang. Melissa couldn't say she was surprised by Janine's message. She goes to her door to wait for the younger teacher. Janine approaches the door, Melissa can see from a mile apart that she's nervous. She does what she does and put on a brave face.

"Come on, get in..." Melissa smiles. As soon as Janine leaves her coat, purse and shoes on the front hall, Melissa's hand gently picks Janine's hand. She guides the younger teacher to the kitchen. As much as Melissa wanted to look confident, she was sure Janine could feel the way her hand was shaking.

"I thought I could help with dinner, or something..." Janine says, but Melissa is fast to shake her head.

"I'm finishing already," Melissa's voice is soft. "And I'm cooking for you, so no help is needed." She explained further, "But you can watch and make me company" They enter the kitchen. And despite Janine's anxiety being somewhere she knows already makes her more relaxed. She settles on top of the kitchen table where Melissa points her to stay and where she can watch everything Melissa is doing. Janine finds herself relaxing.

"Do you want something to drink?" Melissa asks, going to the refrigerator. She has grape juice she'll drink, so she's already taking it out to fill a glass.

"Wine?" Janine answers her with a question.

"I would prefer to not do this drunk, if you don't mind." Melissa said. Janine looked caught. As if she'd been doing something wrong. "Didn't think you liked drinking?" Melissa knows she'd seen Janine drink before, but she didn't really think Janine was the type to get drunk on weekdays.

"I don't usually, but I could use the courage it gives." Janine confesses. Melissa settles the glass with juice by Janine's side. It's interesting to see Janine admitting something like that. Melissa smiles at Janine, her hand touching Janine's chin softly, making sure the woman is looking at her.

"Do I make you nervous, Janine?" Melissa knows she doesn't need to be so close, settling in the middle of Janine's legs. She knows her voice doesn't need to be that low, but she's finding the tiny reactions Janine is trying to hide are too cute for her to ignore.

"A little, yeah..." Janine admits.

"Since when?" Melissa asks with a small laughter. Because she knows Janine is not afraid of her.

"First day at Abbott." Janine says, her eyes meeting Melissa's for a moment. A small smile in her lips.

“Did you have a crush on me back then?” Maybe it’s not really fair of Melissa to ask. But she is curious. It doesn't make sense, she knows, rationally, to want to know something like this from her soulmate. She knew already that they were soulmates, that should be enough for her. Did she think Janine was pretty back then? Yes. Did Janine remind her of younger Barbara? Also yes. But Melissa had long stopped thinking about crushes and romance by then. It hadn't even registered in her mind that they could learn about this soulmate thing a year before.

Her thoughts were interrupted by her bell. Janine hadn't had time to answer her before Ava had shown up, surprisingly early. Melissa had told Janine to keep an eye on the food.

Janine could hear Ava saying hi and entering the house. Her eyes were on the food, but she wanted really badly to turn and watch as Melissa brought Ava into the kitchen.

Janine was nervous yeah, she was. She wasn't scared of Melissa or Ava. But with Melissa it felt like she had some stable ground to stand on. But with Ava she wasn't really sure. And Janine couldn't stop herself from feeling hurt from the way Ava had fled the teacher's lounge. From Ava's lack of contact throughout the day. And still, when Ava enters the kitchen Janine's eyes go to her. She's beautiful - at work she is also beautiful - but the Ava that walks into the kitchen is not wearing the usual straight black lace she has her natural hair out. Short, curly, almost white-blonde hair. And Janine's heart races and she can't really stop the expression on her face, shock mixed in with adoring eyes.

"Why are you blushing Janine? Did y'all start the fun without me?" Ava asks and it is so Ava that Janine smiles, the blushing in her cheeks gets stronger (maybe it's the mention of "fun", maybe it's just that Janine is reminded by how close Melissa was to her and how her voice dropped when she was asking Janine about her possible crush on her).

"We were just talking." Janine answers. Melissa is behind Ava, quietly assessing the situation. Melissa enters fast enough that she sees Janine's reaction to Ava. She understands Janine a bit better then. Her heart races a little too, when she realizes Janine was already in love with Ava. It was undeniable.

"Is that how you called it?" Ava's voice dropped, and Melissa can't help but to smile watching Janine's gay panic. Janine looks a bit panicky as she looks at Melissa, so the redhead stops Ava.

"We were actually just talking, Ava. Food will be ready soon." Melissa's voice is sure, as she mentions for Ava to sit near Janine.

"Okay, so what got Janine all red in this conversation of yours?" The way Ava says "conversation" implies she's not really believing them. Melissa notices it, the way Ava sounds a little bit more annoying rather than just joking. She doesn't think Janine notices.

"Melissa was asking if I had a crush on her since I started at Abbott" Janine answers, and it surprises Melissa that she chooses to tell the truth. That Janine doesn't even stutter when admitting it.

"Did you, Janine?" Ava asks. It's almost daring Janine to answer. Melissa is trying hard not to intrude on the conversation. The silence gets longer, almost uncomfortably so.

"Yes." Janine's voice is low, but it's not unsure or cracking like before.

"Not surprising" Ava comments, nonchalantly. "Melissa is hot." She adds, like it needs explaining. Melissa smiles at her.

"Thanks hon" Melissa says.

"To be fair, I also had a crush on you." Janine adds, knowing well enough that it would bring up more teasing to her.

"Not surprising, really," Melissa said, looking at Ava with a smirk. "Ava is hot." She repeats Ava's own words to her, her voice still low. Ava laughs.

"I know. " Ava answers, with a smirk. Her attention, though, moves to Janine. And Ava realizes something must be going through her head because she's blushing hard.

"Spill Janine." Ava says, daring. That makes Melissa turn to Janine. Janine gulps.

"I-I... I don't..." Janine starts to talk, but stutters and gives up.

"Ok, house rules: nothing you say will be judged or mocked. Not even by Ava." Melissa's voice was suddenly normal. Like Ava, she had an idea of what Janine was thinking too and she didn't want Janine to tiptoe around her, especially about this.

"Really?" Ava asked, genuinely.

"Yes Ava." Melissa confirmed. She looked a bit angry at Ava, but nothing the principal wasn't already used to.

"It's nothing I would mock anyway. I also find it hot to imagine the two of us." Ava gestured between her and Melissa. "It means you got taste, Janine." Ava says, and Melissa worries for a second, because it looks like Janine wants to run for her life with how much she's blushing.

"Are you ok there, Janine?", Melissa asks. "Are you uncomfortable?"

"No, not uncomfortable. Just... feeling a little on the spot?! I don't hate it too much." Janine said.