#too complex

Without:

Martin taking point instead of acting as support on someone else's plan.

Jon recognizing that Martin was taking the initiative, and learning how to trust and follow someone else's lead.

Martin experiencing what it's like to have someone backing him up for once, and learning that he can trust Jon to do so.

Jon learning how to sit in a bad situation while maintaining hope.

Martin learning to set boundaries

Jon being forced to respect those boundaries and learning it isn't the end of the world

This growth doesn't make them more in love than they would have been without it. Instead, it makes their relationship more mature. More flexible.

Without this growth, how would they have reacted to Annabelle turning Martin into a spider husk?

Martin would probably have tried to hide it. He would have tried to manipulate Jon into not looking - he wouldn't have gotten Jon to make that first promise about not Knowing, and so he would have had to improvise.

When Jon found out, he would have gone apeshit. First at Martin, for breaking his trust/acting like a spider through the very act of trying to hide it. Then his survivor's guilt and despair and impulsivity would have kicked in. I'd give greater than even odds that he would kill Martin outright, viewing him as either a monster-replacement or as someone who had never really been his ally.

With this growth, how would they have reacted to Annabelle turning Martin into a spider husk?

Martin wouldn't try to hide it - would actively try to reveal it, if his ability to just explain what was happening had been restricted by the Web. He would trust that Jon could handle it.

But first, I would like to point out that classics reference he made in that letter - the paterfamilias.

I won’t go into much detail but I will make a brief explanation about the complex concept of the Roman paterfamilias; just enough so you can understand where I’m going with this.

The familia, or the Roman family, is the basic institution of the Roman people and heading a typical Roman family is the paterfamilias. The paterfamilias is the oldest living male in a household and exercise autocratic authority over his family. The paterfamilias is typically a full Roman citizen, who enjoyed privileges such as a.) the right to vote in the Roman assemblies, b.) the right to stand for civil or public office, c.) the right to own property and form legal contracts with another Roman citizen, d.) the right to have a lawful marriage with another Roman citizen according to Roman principles and finally, e.) the right to form his own family of which he is to be a paterfamilias to, vested with a special power that a head has over his own household (for further reading, see: patria potestas). (Sources: 1, 2, 3, & 4)

Theory # 1: Henry Laurens commandeered a huge household. He had 13 children with his wife Eleanor Ball Laurens (of whom only five lived past infancy) and the countless slaves his family owns. Despite being a married man himself, Laurens wouldn’t be considered the paterfamilias of the Laurens family until the death of his father. It would make sense he would equate the concept of the paterfamilias to Henry. Bear in mind that Laurens’ mother died when he was just 15 years old, and he grew up in a household that didn’t have benefit of a feminine touch. It was basically just Henry Laurens and his children. His deference to his own family background might have led him to ultimately choose to use “numerous progeny” over “large family”.

Theory # 2: As I mentioned before, a Roman family is more than just the immediate family members. A typical Roman household consists of the paterfamilias, his wife, married sons and their own wives, unmarried daughters, servants and slaves. Laurens is probably aware of the implications of wishing a “large family” on Hamilton. Given his abolitionist bent, Laurens would probably not want Hamilton’s familia to be slave-holding one. Thus, by opting for “numerous progeny”, Laurens is limiting the definition of familia to just Hamilton’s wife and their children (and to specifically exclude slaves from that household).