#tlou fandom

“Let’s get you cleaned,” you spoke gently as you wiped the sand off her clothes from when she was playing in the sandbox.

She giggled, “my momma talks like that!”

“Is that so?” You smiled.

“Mmhmm, especially when she’s helping cats outside!”

“Oh?”

You finished dusting her off, “so your momma feeds stray kitties?”

“She also takes care of them whenever she can with her doctor things!”

“That’s so sweet of her.”

“I wanna be just like her when I grow up,” Evie chirped, her eyes twinkling with confidence.

“I’m sure you will be, for now you make sure you don’t hurt any of your friends, okay?”

“Okay!”

You watched her hop out of the office room, the slight smile on your face never leaving. Kids really were like sunshine, somehow they always managed to make everything sound so simple. You felt blessed to be able to watch over them and teach them things even if sometimes they did make you question your sanity—which funnily enough wasn’t even the worst part of being a teacher.

Maybe the worst part was when you had to wait for the parents to show up after departure to collect their kids, especially when some of them insisted on being late. Today, that just so happened to be Abigail Anderson. It wasn’t the first time that she was late.

You weren’t blaming her, of course, you could only imagine her job as a doctor was demanding and being a single mom was not easy—yeah, you had the tendency of bonding with your students enough to know just a little bit about their parents as well.

You felt a slight tug at your feet and looked down to find Evie’s innocent eyes staring back at you. You smiled instinctively and crouched to her height.

“Yeah?”

“Is momma coming?” she asked, fiddling with the hem of her skirt. “I miss my momma.”

“Yeah, sweetie, she’s on her way, I’m sure,” you said, giving her a reassuring, gentle squeeze to her arm.

Only about ten minutes after that, you saw the car pulling up. She got out—navy blue scrubs, worn running shoes and a smart watch on her wrist that she had been checking frantically throughout the entire drive. She looked like she’d just gotten her soul sucked out of her when she jogged over to the pair of you both.

“I’m so terribly sorry! It’s my fault entirely, I lost track of time—” she was so breathless you had to hold up both hands and shake your head with a smile to get her to pause, and take a breather.

“You’re fine, it hasn’t been that long since departure.”

Abby glanced at her watch, “but—I thought that—”

“It’s okay, just try to be more on time in the future,” you said sweetly and ushered Evie forward.

Evie smiled brightly at you, “thank you, miss y/n!”

“Of course.”

Abby took one of Evie’s hands, rubbing circles on the back of her small hand, “still, I’m really sorry. I really didn’t think I’d hit traffic on the way. I thought I had it all sorted out.”

“Well,” you shifted your balance from one foot to another, “if there’s something that we teach here it’s that—sometimes in life things don’t go your way, and instead of beating yourself up over it, it’s important to strive to do better in the future.”

Abby smiled slightly but you could see the tired lines of her face clearly, she had probably been on her feet for hours now, and you really admired her ability to juggle between such a demanding job and raising a child on the side. She had to be bone-deep tired.

Although you did assume she was tired given the dark circles under her eyes, she didn’t necessarily look bad. Faint wisps of hair framed her face, escaping her now-loose braid and her scrubs were a little wrinkled—she still looked pretty good.

“That’s… really nice.”

You nodded and stood in comfortable silence for a second before you took a step back to allow them a clear path to leave.

“Okay, then. Bye, Evie. Bye, Ms. Anderson.”

“Bye-bye, miss y/n”

“Thank you, bye.”

At home, Evie sang your praises all the time. She drove Abby crazy, chattering on about how you braided her hair exactly how Abby did it and how you helped her perfect her little paintings which Abby put up on the fridge.

“Your teacher really is so kind and helpful,” Abby said with a soft smile as she folded laundry, exhausted but still pushing herself because her daughter deserved an organised home.

“And beautiful.” Abby thought, then quickly pushed the thought out of her head. With the emergency room and working 12-hour shifts a day, taking care of little Evie, Abby didn’t have any time for herself even. Dating was completely out of the question.

She wanted to tell herself that this was not the appropriate time for her to be dating, especially when Evie was so young. Then she reminded herself about when she did try to date when Evie was even younger, just last year. She didn’t react that badly. In fact, she was excited to meet Abby’s partners until Abby decided for herself that she would not be dating anymore, because of how busy she was getting with Evie’s school and work combined.

She couldn’t help that most of the money that she made went towards buying school supplies, and making sure that the lights were on and there was food on the table. So, even if she wanted to upgrade her lifestyle for Evie—she couldn’t really do it on a fixed income.

Not that Evie ever expressed her disappointment over it or anything. In fact, she always told you that her mother was a fucking hero. If anything, Evie looked up to Abby more than she let on—and the day she tells Abby that, would be the day Abby cries tears of happiness.

It was a rather rainy afternoon and traffic was bad again. Abby was, as usual, running pretty late. You didn’t mind, of course. You were standing next to Evie, who had an animal printed band-aid on her knee from when she scraped it during playtime. You were the one who had found her, before she could go to the infirmary. You made sure that she was all taken care of, and took her to the infirmary, just in case—even if it was just a scrape. And because you knew that the band-aid would probably make her stop crying, you offered the nurse it, and when she did apply it, Evie showed you the brightest smile with tears in her eyes.

Tires screeched on the wet concrete as Abby parked quite hastily and got out. You were hoping she wouldn’t drive like that with Evie in there— which you knew she wouldn’t. She got out, not even bothering to get an umbrella for herself. Abby jogged her way to the campus and before she could even say anything, you spoke up;

“Good afternoon, Ms. Anderson. It’s okay. You don’t apologise.”

Evie peeked out from where she was sitting and seeing Abby, she ran up to both of you, backpack already on her shoulders. Abby picked her up, settling her on one hip.

“I know, but it’s still—” Abby began.

“Uh-uh, it’s okay.”

“Thank you, really. I appreciate this a lot, I’m sure most other teachers wouldn’t have been so considerate and nice.”

“It’s alright really, it’s no biggie.”

“Yeah—” Abby looked at the band-aid, “Evie… what happened here?”

Evie grinned and buried her face in Abby’s neck and giggled.

“Oh, it’s really nothing. She fell over during playtime and scraped her knee. I took her to the nurse’s office and we got her a cute band-aid,” you explained.

Abby smiled, rubbing Evie’s back with her other hand as she looked at you, “aw, that’s really, really sweet of you. I wish there were more teachers like you around. I’ve had some interactions with other teachers before, and they weren’t exactly as nice as you.”

“I think that every teacher has their own stance and expertise in their field, and I feel like mine is just to—” you tickled Evie’s side, making her giggle and cling onto Abby harder, “—bond with little angels.”

“And I can see why she likes you. She won’t stop talking about you when we’re home. She’s telling me all about how you braid her hair exactly as I do it. Every time she tries to do her own hair, she just ends up putting it into a knot, and then I have to comb it out. I’m just really glad that you’re around to do it for her when she’s here.”

You chuckled, tone now playful, “as long as she’s getting her hair done by me, I guarantee you, there will be no knots, no tangles.”

“Aww, sweetheart, isn’t your teacher just the sweetest?”

Evie kicked her feet and mumbled “yes, she is.” in Abby’s neck.

“I swear when we’re home she’s, like, so bold about how much she likes you and now when we’re in front of you, she’s suddenly getting all shy.” Abby said with a soft chuckle.

Gosh, she sounded heavenly when she laughed.

You saw that it was raining cats and dogs outside. “How are you gonna get to the car with Evie?”

“Oh—” Abby turned to look at the pouring rain, “we’ll figure something out…”

You grabbed your umbrella from your tote, “here,” you offered it up to her, “take it.”

“No, I can’t. You’re gonna get drenched.”

Evie raised her head slowly and muttered, “we can just walk together then…”

You giggled, “alrighty.”

You held the umbrella open over both of your heads as you both made your way out into the parking lot so Abby could put Evie in her seat. Once she was buckled in, Abby walked over to the driver’s side with you, and paused before opening the door;

“Hey, thank you. Really. You do a lot for us.”

You smiled. “Don’t mention it.”

A pause. Then she spoke again, “would you… would you like to come over for dinner sometime? Evie and I would love to have you over.”

“Yeah, of course, I’d love that!”

What was meant to be just a dinner with the exhausted doctor-mom and her sweet child— the moment Evie went to sleep… things escalated a little. It didn’t exactly start with a kiss, or plans of making out on the kitchen counter. It was when you helped Evie complete her homework after dinner and Abby got everyone ice-cream.

As you all ate ice-cream, she noticed how Evie was dozing off so she put her to bed. It didn’t take long. Evie wasn’t really a cranky child when she was sleepy. She didn’t give anyone trouble. She just dozed off, hugging her favourite plush toy.

“Okay, she’s asleep.” Abby said as she closed the door behind herself.

“Aww, you must get really exhausted taking care of her.”

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world.”

That was sweet. It warmed your chest in a way you hadn’t felt in a long time. You looked down at your ice-cream, and finished it quietly.

Abby sat across from you, unable to stop herself from having the slightest pull at her lips— something about you made her smile. She never felt so soft for anyone other than her daughter before.

Some might say that the easiest way to get to a woman’s heart is flowers, but for Abby, it had to be through her kid, because there is nothing more precious to her than her sweetest child Evie. And you taking your time to get to know Evie and bonding with her, even if it’s just because you were her teacher, was precious to Abby.

“So, I know maybe you think it’s a sore topic or something, but I’m curious… have you been able to see people ever since you’ve had Evie and this lifestyle?”

“Oh, don’t worry, it’s not a sore topic. I actually think about it a lot. I was dating just last year, when Evie was even younger, and she was very supportive of the idea. In fact, she loves meeting new people, so it was really good for her. And even though she’s, like, super young, she understands that her mom might want to… move on from everything that happened in the past, and yeah.” Abby paused for a second, quiet as the TV became a source of background noise. Distant chatter, soft music. “She’s super supportive, but I wanted to focus on her and my career as of now, because things are really hectic…”

“Hectic? I mean— do you wanna date?”

“Yeah.

“The dating factor doesn’t just depend on me. It also matters whether they will have a good bond with my daughter, and if they would be willing to help me around everything. And I don’t think I can trust people with my daughter. It’s a lot of responsibility, and I’m scared, you know? These days, people can be… yeah…”

“Mhm, no, I understand how you feel.”

“I’m really glad I found someone who cares about Evie as much as I do,” Abby murmured, shyly scraping the last of her ice-cream with the spoon.

“You can trust me with anything,” you said gently.

“Thank you.”

Within the next couple days, you both got closer. Abby was surprisingly funny when she got you coffee every morning, she joked around and walked just outside the school premises with you while Evie went inside to play with her friends. You started waiting around more after departure just in case Abby was late and you needed to watch Evie until she arrived— you never minded of course. If anything, you found it endearing; your dynamic with her.

You didn’t realise how attached you were getting to her and you weren’t sure you liked that. You wanted things to be professional, but you couldn’t help it.

Abby was just so funny, cute, hardworking and her thirst to prove that she was a good mom… it was all so endearing to you. You saw things about her others didn’t see— you saw how she tore herself open for her daughter everyday, running back and forth whenever Evie had any kind of event in school.

She handled it all so well for someone who denied herself the pleasure of loving just to make sure she’s giving her daughter her all.

You knew you needed to be honest with her. You didn’t want things to be weird between you and her but fuck— you couldn’t keep your feelings hidden forever.

“Abby…”

“Yeah?”

“... Have you ever thought of dating someone who is already close with your daughter?”

“I guess Evie doesn’t really get close to a lot of people,” Abby said thoughtfully, “but I suppose if I see that they’re close, I can think of giving it a try.”

“Abby?”

“... Yeah?”

You took a deep breath. “I think I like you.”

Abby stopped walking. You did too. For a bit there was silence between you both. Abby slowly turned to look at you. She swallowed hard.

“You like me… romantically?”

You could feel your heart in your throat. This was such a bad idea.

“Yeah, I do. I like you romantically. I have for a bit, and I don’t wanna mess up our friendship. We’ve got something Evie’s fond of and I feel like—”

Abby smiled gently, “hey, shush.”

Your cheeks flushed red.

“Yeah… sorry.”

“You’re okay. I like you too.”

“You do?”

Abby nodded, “I didn’t wanna risk it.”

“You should’ve, I’m horrible at this,” you said with a nervous laugh.

“I take it you’ve never dated the mother of one of your students.”

“No, never,” you giggled, “I could never— I genuinely never meant to catch feelings but I feel like we have something that can be special.”

Abby’s cheeks flushed faintly. So faint it was barely noticeable. “I think so too.”

Abby offered her hand up, fingers spread. You put your hand in hers and gave it a small squeeze. Her skin was warm in comparison to yours, your hands interlaced with one another and swung between you both as you both walked on.

“So… what are we?”

“Whatever you want us to be,” Abby answered playfully.

“Come on…”

“We can be… dating.”

“Girlfriends?”

“Girlfriends.”

-

Evie was asleep. Abby and you always took advantage of times like these when the only sound of the bedroom was the TV running in the background. You smelled faintly like Abby, your arms were around her neck.

“Did you have a good day?”

“Mmm…” her hand rested on your thigh, gently squeezing it, “yeah, it’s a good day now.”

You giggled, “yeah? I make your days better?”

“A lot better.”

Abby pulled you in for a kiss, “c’mere, pretty girl.”

Your lips met hers, moving as if you’d been doing this for years. Both her hands rested on your sides, bringing you closer as she kissed you deeper. She shifted you onto her lap, her hands never leaving you as the kiss turned a little heated.

Your hands were in her hair. Her braid that was already a little messy after her shift got even messier as you slowly pulled the hair tie off to run your fingers through her silky hair.

“Abby…”

“Mm?”

“Should we really be doing this now?”

“Evie sleeps like a log, we’re fine,” Abby murmured, “I used to vacuum with one hand and carry her with the other, she can survive a little noise.”

You grinned, “you just wanna get in my pants, don’t you?”

“My, my. You got a mouth on you.”

“I can do a lot with my mouth.”

Abby raised a brow at that. “Is that right?”

“Mmm, but I don’t think you can handle all of this.”

She leaned forward and nibbled at the skin of your neck, making your eyes flutter shut. Her hands held you a little tighter as if she was afraid of letting you go while her mouth worked on your neck.

“Don’t leave marks… I have work tomorrow, if the kids see I’ll be in so much trouble.”

Abby groaned against your skin, “what a bummer.”

You unbuttoned your sweater and let it fall down your shoulders, exposing your bra-clad tits, “it’s not all that bad.”

“Fuck…” she murmured under her breath before she attacked you tits with her mouth, teeth nipping at the skin and mouth efficiently sucking hickeys all over your skin.

“That’s it, baby…” you tilted your head back, enjoying her mouth on you.

Abby slowly pushed you down on your back and pulled your clothes off one by one until you were left bare. You tugged at the hem of her shirt.

“Let me see those muscles.”

“Yeah?” Abby pulled her night-shirt over her head, revealing years of trained muscles, abs that glistened in the room’s warm lighting, biceps that looked like they’d manhandle you back in place if you acted bratty.

“Shit, I just came a little.” You joked.

Abby giggled at that, “you’re impossible.”

She kissed you briefly as her hands reached down, gently prying your thighs apart. Your cunt was soaked already. She pulled the blanket over both your heads with one hand, as she whispered;

“Don’t make a mess in my bed. Evie’s gonna ask me why my room smells like pussy.”

You huffed, “then why are you pulling the blanket over?”

“So that if she comes in she doesn’t see her teacher naked in her momma’s bed.”

You stifled a snort, “you’re horrible.”

“Say that when you’re cumming on my fingers.”

Her hand found your cunt, cupping it for a second before she rubbed your vulva. She gently parted your lips to expose your soaked folds and slit.

“Such a pretty girl, such a soaked cunt,” Abby whispered, peppering butterfly kisses on your forehead.

“Shut up…”

“You don’t want me to.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Good girl.”

Her words made your cunt clench around nothing. Abby smirked.

“That turns you on?”

“...”

Abby’s fingers dipped past your slit and in your pussy making you whine softly and grip her other arm with your hand, nails digging into her muscles. Her fingers were somehow really good at it as she carefully thrusted in all the way up to her knuckles.

“That okay, my pretty girl?”

Your cheeks flushed so red, you were sure she could feel the heat radiating from your face. “Mm… mhm.”

Abby’s fingers fucked you gently, scissoring at first to make sure you were nicely stretched out before she curled them in that specific spot that made you struggle to contain your moans.

“O-oh, fuck, wait, that’s so good, that’s feels so good,” you said breathlessly, making Abby’s own pussy drip with need.

She found that textured spot again, repeatedly abusing your g-spot with her fingers. Her two fingers were enough— they were thick, long and perfect.

“Abby— Abby, you have no idea how good you’re at this.”

“I know,” she kissed you on the lips softly before she muttered against your lips, “you’re so beautiful like this. You’re all mine.”

“I always will be,” you wrapped your arms around her neck.

Her fingers worked faster, twisting, reaching deeper than your own fingers ever went. She slammed them in, making you clench and make the softest, sluttiest moans ever right in her ear.

“Shhh, you gotta be a bit quieter,” Abby whispered.

“But I’m—”

“You can do it, baby.”

Your pussy walls felt overly sensitive. Her words weren’t helping. All the filthy sounds of your cunt mixed with the praises she uttered— you were so drunk in her love and the pleasure she gave you.

“I’m cumming,” you bit down on her shoulder.

“That’s it, that’s my girl. Cum for me, princess.”

And you did.

You came so hard you swore you saw stars.

“See, you are capable of being so quiet and good,” Abby said with a smile.

You pouted, “clean me up, I feel so sticky…”

“I know,” Abby peeked out of the blanket, “let’s get you out.”

You insisted you could walk but Abby wasn’t hearing it. She picked you up bridal style and guided you to the bathroom, settling you down on the closed lid of the toilet.

She let you be while you peed and she went out to change the sheets. Once you both were done, she moved you into the shower and checked the water for you first, using her own hand. Then, she guided you inside.

“Too sore?” She asked as she took a good amount of shower gel on the loofa.

“No, just about fine,” you replied, watching as Abby gently cleaned your body.

You cleaned hers back, letting your hands linger on every dip and ridge of her hard muscles. Abby felt it, she was aware you were taking your sweet time feeling her up, and she enjoyed it.

“I don’t like fine,” Abby said after a bit and pinned you to the shower wall, “I wanna fuck you until you can’t walk straight for days.”

You smirked, “too bad, baby, that isn’t happening anytime soon.”

Abby pouted— the cutest expression ever, “why?”

“I have work,” you laughed and kissed her right on her pouted lips, “and I need to be able to give my all.”

She rolled her eyes, but there was no heat beneath it. “Fine, fine.” she paused. “But one day… Maybe this weekend, I’ll show you just how good I am with my strap.”

Your eyes widened.

“You own a strap?”

Well, shit. You were looking forward to this weekend.

But it didn’t change Abby.

She remained the way she was.

Avoidant. Negligent.

Sometimes she asked you if you ate dinner when she got back from work, sometimes she just went straight to bed.

She didn’t even cuddle you anymore.

It felt like the love was a flame of a candle slowly dying down.

You reached a hand over the table, putting it over Abby’s, “I don’t want good, I want you.”

Abby sighed and moved her hand away, “you don’t understand—”

“Oh, I understand alright,” you cut in, “I want to be with you, and even if it takes a lot of relationship counselling, we’ll make it work. How about… you and I book a couples therapy session at—?”

Abby got up, “I don’t think talking is helping.”

A couple heads turned.

You got up too, “so you want to throw away the two years we’ve spent together?”

Abby stared.

Was it fear you saw? Fear of losing an investment or a lover? You couldn’t quite place it, but this wasn’t the time for you to be dissecting her emotions. You were a human being with feelings, and at the moment, you had tears in your eyes.

How could she not want to save the relationship?

You grabbed your purse, “I’m calling a cab back home.”

And you left.

Abby didn’t chase. She stood there and stared after you dumbly as if you’d just slapped her across the face.

Maybe she knew what she was doing wrong but she’d hoped you’d forget about it, maybe give her the benefit of the trust you both had, but you weren’t stupid. You knew when to speak up, but as you hailed a cab and headed back home—you wondered if Abby was falling out of love with you.

The thought alone made warm tears blur your vision, you looked down, letting your tears drip down onto your lap. Why didn’t she love you the same anymore? Did you change? Did you look any different?

The questions didn’t stop in your head and that’s what made it worse. The driver noticed you crying but didn’t say anything—you were grateful for that at least. You didn’t need anyone to question your misery at the moment, maybe things could get better.

When you got home, the first thing you did was take a cold shower to try to get your mind off of the pain. Abby wasn’t home yet. Maybe she wouldn’t come home. Maybe she’d ghost you. Maybe…

The thought made your chest ache.

Didn’t it hurt her to be away? Water cascaded down your back, leaving your hair and face soaked. You took a deep breath and gathered all the energy left in your body to finish up, before stepping outside in nothing but just a towel wrapped around your frame.

The door opened and clicked shut.

You turned.

Abby was home.

But you weren’t about to talk to her. You couldn’t. You could feel new tears forming, but you walked and got some clothes out of your closet.

You could hear the floorboards creaking elsewhere as Abby stumbled around the house. You wore your pajamas quietly, trying not to think about your girlfriend being under the same roof as you, after that intense conversation.

You got in bed, pulled the blanket up to your chest, and turned the lights off. As you snuggled against nothing, holding your pillow firmly against the side of your face—you realised just how attached you were to Abby.

“Baby…” you heard her slur.

The bedroom door creaked open. Footsteps filled the small space.

“Baby.”

Suddenly—weight on your body.

Your eyes snapped open.

“Abby!?”

“I love you, baby, I love you, I’m sorry,” she sobbed.

You turned the light on. Abby was there sprawled halfway on the bed, arms wrapped around the length of your legs.

“Baby, what’s—!?”

That’s when you saw it.

She was drunk, her eyes were red and watery. You got up, and wrapped your arms around Abby’s muscular frame.

“Hey, hey, hey, I’m here…”

“I’m sorry,” she sobbed into your legs, face pressed into the fuzzy fabric of the blanket.

“It’s okay, you’re—you need rest.”

You helped her up onto the bed. Her face was flushed, cheeks glossy and red as she continued crying quietly. You pulled her in a hug, holding her gently.

“You’re so pretty…”

You felt your cheeks warm up, the sudden compliment making your heart flutter.

“You’re my pretty girl, and I’m sorry I’ve been a fucking asshole, I—”

“You’re not an asshole” you rubbed Abby’s back soothingly.

You could smell the alcohol on her breath now, heavy and bitter, but underneath it was Abby—your Abby—the same woman who used to press sleepy kisses to your shoulder at three in the morning, the same woman who memorized how you took your coffee after only two dates.

And she was crying like her heart was being ripped open.

“Abby, it’s okay, we can work things out…”

She hiccuped softly. “S-sorry… I’m scared… I’m so scared.”

“Scared? Why?”

“You love me so fucking much.” Her voice trembled harder now. “And I kept thinking… eventually you’re gonna wake up and realize I’m not worth all that love.”

“You’re worth it all, Abby, you’re worth more than everything I give you.”

“I’m not…”

“Yes, you are.”

You rocked back and forth quietly, hugging Abby and whispering to her about how much she means to you.

“I kept trying to act normal but every day I just—” she let out a shaky breath, “—I kept thinking about how happy you make me and it scared the shit out of me.”

You were crying now too. You buried your face in her shoulder.

“You fucking idiot… you could’ve just told me that.”

You both sniffled, letting the moment break both of your guards down in a way that showed your true selves. You didn’t even remember when you both had ended up falling asleep, faces covered in tearstains and the slightest trace of drool, limbs entangled with one another.

When you woke up the next day, the first thing that hit you was the smell of alcohol. You pushed Abby’s heavy toned legs off your body, and looked at her peaceful sleeping face, blond hair mussed with sleep.

“Baby, wake up, we have work…”

Abby rolled over. “Not going. Calling in sick…”

“No, you’re not.” You pushed her. “Wake up!”

“No… head hurts…”

You got up with an annoyed huff and walked out of the room. The kitchen was neat—none of you had eaten dinner last night. You could only be grateful Abby was a lightweight and didn’t get too drunk on an empty stomach.

The concept of her getting alcohol poisoning made your heart clench painfully. You prepared the most half-assed lemonade ever in a glass and hurried to the bedroom, perching at the edge.

You pushed Abby with your hand again.

“Wake up, Abby, here,” the moment you saw her groggily open one eye, you shoved the glass in her hand, pushing her hand close to her lips.

She quickly sat up, and sipped.

“Fuck…”

“You’re going to work,” you said, getting off the bed and wrenching the closet door open, “and so am I. And we get back, and we talk about this—whatever happened last night.”

“I don’t think there’s anything to—”

“You were sobbing to my legs in the dark.”

Abby’s cheeks went a deep shade of red.

“No, I was not.”

“Abigail Anderson.”

“Okay, fine, maybe I was.”

You rolled your eyes and took your pajamas off right there, grabbing your work clothes. Before you could put your deodorant on, and shirt on—Abby got off the bed and threw her heavy arms around you, lemonade sitting forgotten on the bedside table now.

“Abby… we can do this later.”

“No,” Abby slowly pressed you against the closet, your back facing her, “we’re fixing things now…”

“We’re not.”

“Yes, we are.”

You turned around forcefully, “Abby, I told you we’re—”

Her lips captured yours, hushing you.

Her thigh pushed between both yours, pressing up against your most sensitive area. You couldn’t help tensing a little when you felt her pressing so close. You could taste the lemon on her tongue. Her hands felt your skin, moving against you like it was all muscle memory.

Abby pulled away. She looked like a mess with the tearstains on her cheeks and messy hair, but she looked brighter than ever before.

She hadn’t been this close to you in a long time, and that only made your heart beat faster against your ribs. Your panties felt damp, you subconsciously ground your body down against Abby’s jeans.

In the position you both were in, the side difference was even more noticeable. She wasn’t all that much bigger than you, but her muscle mass easily made her appear bigger. And she seemed to fucking enjoy it.

“That’s it, baby,” she whispered finally parting from the kiss, “fuck… grind, just like that.”

“You’re such a jerk…”

But you did exactly what she said.

Abby’s other hand cupped your ass, giving it a firm squeeze as she moved you back and forth on the rough material of her jeans.

“Abby, Abby, I need you. I have for so long and it fucking hurts…”

“Tell me… did you masturbate thinking of me?”

Your throat went dry. But you forced yourself to answer.

“Yes.”

“Did you cum thinking of me?”

You nodded.

Abby pulled you closer. “I asked a question, baby.”

“Yes, I came thinking of you.”

“Good girl.”

Abby pulled you to the bed where she laid you, and spread your legs, admiring what’s on between. Abby’s hands remained on the insides of your thighs, pinning them down effectively as her tongue darted out to gather your juices.

She licked you up, tasting you on her tongue.

And she fucking moaned.

The taste of you—something she had deprived herself from for the last few days—it drove her crazy in the best way possible.

“Baby, I need you…”

Abby didn’t respond, she circled your clit using her tongue before pressing it to you making your hips twitch.

“Abby!” You moaned her name.

Abby moaned hearing you moan.

That’s how desperate she was for you.

She held you down, devouring you with her tongue. Worshipping you with her tongue like she hadn’t done all those other weeks. When she thought back to that, it only made her more and more willing to eat you out until you’re nothing but a mess in a puddle of your own release.

Her tongue disappeared inside entirely, rubbing against your walls while her hands kept your thighs from closing around her head—not that she’d hate you making it impossible for her to breathe.

Abby flicked her tongue on your sensitive clit—that’s all it took for you to cum. It spilled on Abby’s chin and the sheets beneath you both. The orgasm washed over you, leaving your body a trembling mess.

“Please… I—Abby, I need your fingers. Now…”

Abby kissed your mound before readying two fingers, “whatever my princess wants.”

Her digits shoved inside you slowly, letting you feel the stretch as her thick fingers scissored their way into your tight cunt.

You squeezed around her, “o-oh, please, I need you…”

Abby kissed your lower abdomen and continued spreading kisses out on the skin of your inner thighs while her fingers pumped in and out of you, making curling motions to find that one textured spot in you.

“Fuck, I missed this… Abby, I missed you.”

“I missed you too, my angel.”

Her thumb rubbed your clit in tight circles, three fingers fucking you like there was no tomorrow.

Tears pricked your eyes.

Tears of pleasure and not pain.

“Abby!” You gasped, grabbing her hair.

You came again, this time messier than before. Abby leaned down.

“I can’t—Abby, I’m overstimulated!” You squeaked.

“I know,” Abby said, “let me clean you…”

Her tongue glided over your sensitive skin as she licked up your juices, licking your cum off your skin using her tongue.

“My poor angel has been so deprived of this.”

Her hands left your thighs and snaked around your hips.

Without warning, she stuffed her face in your pussy, eating you out like a starved woman.

Surprised—your moans got louder.

Not even words anymore.

Nothing coherent.

Just filthy pornographic moans as you held her head tighter.

Eventually, when Abby’s jaw grew slack, slowly you pulled her up from between your legs and pressed a kiss on her beautiful lips.

“You’ve done enough for the day…” you whispered hoarsely.

“I think we both should call in sick since we’re late already.” Abby smiled.

“You—” you shook your head with a laugh, “you’re such a menace.”

Abby held you closer, “as long as I’m yours.”

Abby’s bigger arms wrapped around you, holding you in place as she sank back onto the mattress. Your body ached with exhaustion.

“I’ll get up and get you ice-cream in a bit.”

You looked over at her. “No, I don’t need it.”

Abby looked at you, confused, “but aftercare—”

“I just want cuddles.”

Abby chuckled.

It was warm. Full of love.

“Okay, we can do that.”

You hugged her tight, and whispered, “ice-cream later…”

Abby laughed and held your naked body close, “alright, my angel.”

“No.”

“Joel, you haven’t even said hello.”

“I don’t care, baby; it’s a no.”

“But look at his little face; how can you say no to that?”

You look down at the kitten's big eyes staring up helplessly at you. You’re standing next to Joel as he sits at his workbench, glasses on the tip of his nose as he fiddles with something he's working on. During your evening patrol shift, you found the kitten looking scared and desperate not far from the town. Despite being more than aware that Joel would not appreciate such an addition to the family, you couldn’t just leave this helpless little being out in the snow all alone. So there was only one solution: hide him in your supply bag where it was warm and safe, and bring him home with you.

“Take it to Maria or that old lady down the road; we can’t have that thing running round ‘ere. Probably carrying enough disease to wipe out the town too.”

“Don’t be crazy, we’ll have the vet check him out.”

“I’m sure he's got more pressing matters than this.”

“Well, that was not the welcome I promised you, was it, huh?” You say down to the tiny bundle of innocence in your arms. “Think you caught him on a grumpy day.” Joel rolls his eyes as he continues carving the wooden object in front of him. “We’re not sending him back out into the cold, Joel.”

“He’s an animal; he’ll survive.”

“He’s too tiny; another night out in the snow would kill him, Joel.”

“Well darlin’, I don’t know what you want me to do, but he isn’t staying under my roof. And whatever you do, don’t let Ellie see him.”

Almost perfectly timed, you hear the front door close in the distance and soon the approaching footsteps up the wooden stairs.

“Great. Here we go.” Joel mumbles, knowing exactly what’s about to happen. Turning around, you’re greeted with a rosy-cheeked Ellie, back from her night with Dina at the Tipsy Bison. Her eyes instantly go wide with affection as she takes in the sight before her.

“Oh. My. God. Are you kidding me?? Heyyy little one!” She comes forward, taking the kitten from your arms and holding it up to her face, letting the tiny being sniff at her face. “She’s so small! Where did you find her?”

“It’s a boy.” Joel grunts from behind you. You smile then; at least you know he paid attention.

“Found him by the old barn about a mile out from town. Poor thing was shivering, alone and hungry. Checked the area for Mom and any siblings, but there was not trace. Will check again next patrol to make sure.”

"Jesus christ," Joel mutters under his breath. "I hope not, we'll have a whole goddamn zoo before we know it."

"Joel," You laugh at his words.

“What are you going to call him?” Ellie asks.

“Not calling him anything El'. He ain’t staying,”

“What?! No, we have to keep him!” She protests, worry spreading across her face at the thought of giving him away, or worse, letting him loose back into the harsh mountains surrounding Jackson.

“He should stay here, he knows us now, anyone else would only frighten him.”

“Yeah, right. Kids been out there in the wilderness by himself this long; if he can survive out there, he ain’t afraid of nothing.” Joel bites.

Ellie moves around you over to Joel sitting by his workbench. Without giving him a choice, she hands the kitten to him. Instinctively, he holds the kitten close to his chest, his protective nature kicking in. She turns to you with a wink. The kitten reaches up, his little paws coming up to rest on Joel’s chin. Joel’s a big guy, and seeing this tiny little vulnerable creature in his hands, you’d expect the kitten to be frightened, but he isn’t. Instead he seems taken to Joel more than you and Ellie as it licks at his beard.

“He loves you already.” You say in a soft voice.

“How do you get him to stop doing that?” Joel shuts his eyes in disgust, wanting to pull away but not wanting to hurt the baby.

Ellie laughs. “You don’t. He’s just telling you he likes you.”

“Hmmm.” He grunts. Moving the kitty away from his face gently, Joel rests him down on the bench in front of him. The kitten bounces across the table quickly, and the look of panic on Joel’s face amuses you. He might not want to keep him, but that look certainly tells you he cares. As the three of you watch him, the kitten begins to flick his tiny paw against a small tool laid on the surface, making it roll along the top.

“Like father, like son.” You tease.

"Don’t start with that." Joel's shakes his head.

“He could be your workshop buddy!" Ellie suggests excitedly.

"No. I’d never get any of these things complete. Besides, it’s too dangerous.”

"okay, well..." Ellie looks up trying to think of ideas, anything to try persuade Joel. "You could train him up and take him on patrol, your own little protector!”

“I don’t need a protector, El'. Besides, how would a thing smaller than my hand protect me? I'd probably just end up accidently standing on him and that would be the end of it. Look, he’s not going to be anything, ok?." The kitten then begins playing with a large piece of wood, making it spin off the surface and onto the floor. “Hey, stop that.” Joel says, picking the ball of fur up in one hand and holding it close to his chest again. “Damn things a liability. Just take him somewhere else.”

“But it’s so dark and stormy now. Tomorrow?” You ask. You know Joel too well, he might not want him right this second, but just keeping the kitten in his company tonight, he’ll be attached before he knows it.

He sighs. “Fine. He can stay here tonight, but that's it. I mean it, he’s not staying.”

"Awesome!" Ellie looks at you with a cheeky smirk. When it comes to you two, Joel may put up a fight, but he almost always gives in.

“Oh, and he’s not staying in your room, Ellie." he turns looking up at you. "There’s a box in the garage; put him in that.”

“Right, sure.” You nod in agreement, but have no intention of leaving the poor thing in a dark and scary box alone in the cold garage all night.

Two hours later as the snow falls and the wind howls outside, you snuggle up under the covers and rest your head on the pillow, waiting for Joel to come out of the bathroom and join you. When he finally plods around the bed, he climbs in and pulls you close into him with a kiss on the top of your head. He smells clean and feels a little damp from his shower, but he’s warm and always makes you feel so safe in his arms. You know he’s tired, he’s been complaining most of the night, so it isn’t long before you feel him starting to drift off. As he does, there's movement underneath the covers, something soft against both of your legs. His eyes open wide.

“What is that?” He asks, though you know he knows exactly what it is.

“What?”

“Please tell me that isn’t what I think it is…”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You whisper, playing innocent.

He untangles from you, reaching over to the nightstand to turn the lamp back on, and you both watch the small lump under the covers moving up towards you.

“You’ve got to be joking,” he exhales as the kitten’s face pokes out from under the covers. “You’re not supposed to be in ‘ere,” Joel mumbles, looking down at the fur ball as though he’s expecting any kind of response. He picks the kitten up in his hand and holds him up above you both, watching him make biscuits in the air. “Didn’t I tell you to put him in the garage?”

“Somehow I don’t think he wants to be in the garage…” you whisper.

“I don’t have time for this, darlin’. Got a busy day tomorrow, I need sleep.” He leans over and puts the kitten down on the floor beside the bed. “You, stay down there; don’t even think about jumping back up here.” The kitten just looks up at him, a sparkle in his eye. “Don’t look at me like that.”

He switches out the light and turns back over to you, wrapping his arms back around you to pull you in again. But of course, within seconds, you hear the tiny persistent thud of the kittens' paws on the floor as he continuously fails to jump back up onto the bed.

“You know he’s not going to stop that, don’t you? He wants to be with us.” You smile.

“Oh, he’ll stop when he gets tired, give it five.” He mumbles into the pillow.

Your heart starts to break at the thought of the kitten not being able to reach up as you lie there listening for a while. As you're about to move to get out of bed to rescue him from the floor, you see those little familiar ears climbing up the mountain of Joel’s back, over his shoulder and jumping down off his arm to land in the very small gap between your heads, the soft fur tickling Joel’s nose.

“Urghhhh. This goddamn child.” Joel groans deeply, but he doesn’t attempt to move, accepting defeat. You watch in the darkness as the kitten curls up just underneath Joel’s chin.

“He likes you, baby, I think you’re his favourite already.” You watch the kitten settling down to go to sleep in the safety beside Joel.

“Just for tonight then. Tomorrow, you find him another home.” His eyes are closed, and the sight before you is adorable. Joel, so big, so broad, so protective with the tiniest, most vulnerable little ball of cuteness buried close against him.

When you wake the next morning, your heart melts. Joel, the same Joel who told you this kitten couldn't stay, is lying on his back with the kitten curled up on his chest, both sleeping peacefully. You watch them both for a while until the kitten turns to stretch and wakes Joel. He breathes in deeply, his long limbs moving under the covers until his leg rests up against yours again and his hand reaches out to stroke and down the bare skin of your thigh.

“Morning, you two.” You say softly, head resting on your palm.

“Morning, my love.” He says half asleep.

“Hate to ruin the moment, boys, but someone’s given me the task of finding a new home for this one.”

“Talking to me or him?” Joel jokes, and it makes you chuckle. He opens one eye to look at you. “He’s resting. Let him stay for another hour, then you can take him.”

“Whatever you say, mister.”

Two nights later when you curl up into bed again, Joel walks in, the kitten balancing on his shoulder, clearly still not taken to another home.

“Ellie said I’m a cat dad now.” Joel says with a shake of his head.

You grin. “I think she might be right.”

“Jesus Christ.” He sighs, coming over to the bed.

“Don’t pretend like you hate it.” You giggle. He rolls his eyes as he climbs under the covers, and the kitten jumps down to curl up in the small space between you both.

“We have to find him a different bed tomorrow, though; he can’t sleep in ‘ere anymore, keeps stealing my spot next to you.” He sighs. “Kid needs to respect his parent’s privacy, gonna have to teach him some boundaries...” Joel reaches down underneath the covers, letting his palms roam up and down your body.

“Sure, baby.” You smile to yourself knowing full well Joel isn’t ever going to be able to let this kitten out of his sight for too long.

12 years, four kids, and an apocalypse together— a lifetime full of surprises with Joel. Seeing Joel get old was not something you ever thought you’d get experience, especially in this world— it’s truly one of your biggest blessings.

Jackson has been good to you, a place for you to call home and for your kids to thrive. Joel has been at home a lot more, not that he wanted to be— but after his heart attack it was the doctors orders.

Tonight is Joel’s birthday dinner, he’s finally turned sixty.

Joel gets home—hanging his coat on the rack and sliding his shoes off by the door. You’re in the kitchen finishing up making dinner.

“Where have you been? You left earlier while I was taking a nap.” You mention.

He comes behind you while you’re at the stove, wrapping his arms around your waist and placing a kiss on your cheek.

“I went out with the guys for patrol”

You turn, looking at him.

“Joel..”

“Baby, I just did a walk around the perimeter with them— no heavy stuff.”

“Did you at least bring your pills?”

Joel’s eyes widen as he leans over, putting his finger on the edge of the pan and tasting the lasagna sauce.

He lets out a slight chuckle, “this sauce is really good.”

He walks away, trying to avoid the question.

You let out a sigh, turning back to the stove.

“You need to take this seriously, I don’t want to find out that my husband had another heart attack because he wouldn’t listen.”

He sits on the couch, putting his glasses on to watch one of the dvd movies you have.

“Honey, I won’t forget again. I promise.”

The scent of garlic bread and lasagna fills the house.

“I see that you got some new movies for the collection. Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, and X-men.”

You’re too focused on pulling out the plates, “yeah. They found them when they went out last week and gave them to me.”

The lock to the front door turns—the door opens and the kids come running in.

“Please, take your shoes off and your jackets!” You yell from the kitchen.

Your daughter Claudia runs and jumps in Joel’s lap.

“Happy birthday, daddy!” She giggles.

Joel laughs, putting down the movies and giving her a kiss on the forehead.

“Thank you, pumpkin. How was your time with Sarah?”

“It was good. Her and Jonah are so much fun!”

Joel’s brow raises, “Jonah?”

You bring the food over to the table— setting it up and wiping your hands off on your apron. Sarah turns the corner, “it smells good.”

“Thank you, honey! Can you call your siblings in here, so they can get seated for dinner?”

You look up and see a boy walking behind Sarah.

“Oh! I didn’t know you brought company, who’s your friend?”

She smiles awkwardly, Jonah now standing beside her.

“This is Jonah..”

He waves at you as you walk over to shake his hand.

“Nice to meet you Jonah.”

“Nice to meet you as well, ma’am.” He replies, shaking your hand with a sweaty palm.

“He’s my boyfriend.” Sarah blurts out.

Your eyes widen, “boyfriend?”

She nods, looking at you nervously.

“Does Joel know?” You giggle.

Sarah shakes her head no.

“Do I know what?” Joel asks, turning the corner behind Jonah— holding Claudia in his arms.

You laugh, pulling your apron off and walking back over to the sink.

Sarah turns to face Joel, hesitating. “This is my boyfriend, Jonah.”

Joel’s mouth falls open as he sits Claudia down in the chair closest to him.

“Boyfriend?”

Jonah awkwardly chuckles, holding his hand out for Joel to shake it.

“Nice to meet you sir and Happy birthday!”

Joel just stands there, looking at them.

You glance over at them, letting out a sigh.

“Joel!” You loudly whisper.

“Right, thank you.” He nods, shaking Jonah’s hand.

“Kids come in here for dinner!” You yell, placing napkins on the table.

Dinner goes well— the lasagna is a hit and so is the chocolate birthday cake. Despite Joel being surprised by Sarah with a boyfriend, he did try to get to know him during dinner and even shared a few laughs with him.

The door is opened, Jonah walking out before Sarah.

“Bye guys, I’ll be back over tomorrow. I love you!”

“I love you too! Be careful.” You both shout in sync as she shuts the door.

“The dishes are going to soak for a little bit and then I’ll wash them.” You mumble, talking to yourself.

Joel is leaning against the counter, staring at you like you’re his favorite snack on a hungry day.

“You didn’t have to do anything for me, I’m so glad you did.” He admits, walking over to you.

“It’s your birthday, of course I was going to do something. We had to celebrate your sixtieth birthday, it’s a big deal.” You grin.

He pulls you close to him, his hand caressing your cheek.

His lips meet yours in a needy kiss.

“I need you so bad.” He confesses.

As much as you love kissing him, you pull back.

“Joel..” you mutter.

“What’s wrong?”

“We can't. Remember what the doctor said?”

He hangs his head down in defeat

“Baby, my heart is gonna be fine. I already took my pills during dinner too.”

“I don’t want to chance it.”

He starts kissing your neck, “I’m aching for you.”

You whimper, trying so hard not to cave in— but it feels so good having his lips on you after three months.

“The kids are asleep.. and it’s been so long, baby.” He mumbles in between his kisses.

You slowly shift away from him, trying to fight the urge to rip off his clothes.

“I’m gonna go shower, once I’m done we can watch one of those movies.”

He groans, “alright.”

You can tell that he’s a bit frustrated, you are too. You just want to be mindful of his health. You’d love to fuck him every night, but the doctor told him no strenuous activity until he’s cleared.

You take a cold shower, trying to forget the urge to fuck Joel. The water runs down your body and flashes of him fucking you flood your mind.

You can feel the heat and wetness pooling between your legs.

You get out of the shower— wiping yourself off and throwing on one of Joel’s t-shirts.

Joel’s on the couch with his glasses on and reading the back of the X-men dvd.

“I think I want to go with this one.” He mutters.

You come into the living room and straddle his lap, catching him off guard.

“Sugar, what are you doing?”

“I want you so bad, I don’t want to wait anymore.” You confess, your hands rubbing his chest.

He sets the dvd down on the table, keeping eye contact with you.

“You sure about that?”

You nod, “I am. Unless you don’t want to fuck me anymore?”

His hands grips your ass and glide up your back.

“Darlin, I want to fuck you every way I can.”

You bite your lip— pulling his glasses off and setting them down.

“Good.”

You kiss him, moaning into his mouth.

He pulls your shirt over your head, staring at you in awe while you sit in his lap completely naked.

He pulls you closer—kissing your chest, his hand cupping your breast and rubbing your nipple.

Your hips grind against his sweats out of pure need.

His tongue circles your nipple, making you moan.

“Joel.. fuck me.”

He picks you up and lays you on your back, taking his sweats and shirt off.

His cock springs free— thick, veins bulging, and precum coating his tip.

He comes down on the couch, in between your legs— kissing you like he’s been starved.

“You ready for me?” He whispers in your ear.

You nod, arching your back as he rubs his head against your clit.

His head pushes in, stretching you and making you gasp.

“Shit, mama. You’re tight as hell.” He groans.

You grab his arm, trying to get used to the stretch again.

“You got this baby. Doing so well, taking all of me.”

He’s fully inside you, filling you up in a way that you’d almost forgotten what it felt like.

He leans down, kissing your neck and shoulder— slowly thrusting in and out of you.

“Fuck, your cock is so big.” You moan.

He chuckles, his hips slamming against you— going deeper with each stroke.

“Yes, Joel. It feels so good.”

“Mhmm.” He grunts.

He pulls out of you, catching you off guard.

“Turn around for me, mama.”

You get up, turning around and getting on all fours—arching your back.

“What a beautiful sight.”

He lines himself up, pushing in— slapping your ass.

He fucks you like he can’t get enough, his hips slamming into your ass.

“Just like that. You’re so deep inside me.” You moan.

He grabs your hair, wrapping it around his fist.

“You like that?” He grunts.

“Yes, fuck” you whimper.

He smacks your ass again, smiling as he watches it bounce on his cock.

“Shit, I’m gonna-“

“Fuck.”

“That’s right, sugar. Cum for me.”

Your pussy grips him like a fist as moans spill from your mouth.

He lets go of your hair and brings both hands back to your hips.

“Don’t get too loud, baby. We ain’t home alone.”

His release is quickly approaching.

“Mmm baby, I’m about to cum.” He moans.

Two more thrusts and his warm ropes of cum are filling you up.

He keeps thrusting in and out of you, riding out his fantastic release.

He pulls out, falling onto the couch behind you and trying to catch his breath.

“Shit, darlin. I needed that.”

You giggle, turning around— facing him and grabbing your shirt.

“Me too. I didn’t realize how much I needed that.”

“Whoo. I need a minute and maybe another pill.” He jokes.

You nudge him.

“That’s not funny.”

“Well, it wouldn’t have been the worst way to die. I would’ve gone out as a happy man.”

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

joel miller was a man of many capabilities.

he could lay concrete with his eyes closed, fix a leaky sink, muster up a tune from lazily strumming a few cords.

but one thing he wasn’t too great at, was dealing with the emotions of others. which was something he was unfortunately having to do a lot of for the past year and a half.

he still remembers getting that call on a slow and lazy Sunday morning. the call that damn near brought joel to his knees. the broken whisper from you over the phone telling him about your parents dying in that tragic car accident still haunted him to this day.

joel made a promise to himself that he would take care of you. that he would be that guardian figure that you needed, but one thing he didn’t see coming was falling in love with you in the process.

the defeating sound of your alarm going off tore you from your slumber — forcing you to drag yourself out of bed and throw on the first thing you could find in your closet.

the thought of sitting through a world literature class this morning and a british literature class this afternoon made you want to a put a bullet in your head, so, you sheepishly made your way downstairs.

joel sat at the kitchen table like he usually did every morning, nursing a coffee and a cigarette with the newspaper in hand and a restless look in his eyes.

the minute he saw you, his demeanour shifted — visibly tensing up.

you made your way into the kitchen, hair now thrown up a messy ponytail. “hey, old man,” you chirped in a sing song voice, sitting across from him on the kitchen table. “no coffee for me?”

“the machines over there,” he grumbled, taking a long drag from his half smoked cigarette and tipping the ash off it into the tray on the table. his eyes briefly met yours with an unreadable look, clearly noticing your very not appropriate class attire — a sloppy graphic tee and a pair of sleep shorts he could only catch a glimpse of from how long the shirt was. “ain’t lookin’ very professional over there.”

“yeah well.. m’not really in the mood to go to class today.” you answered with a hint of nervousness.

that caught joel’s attention.

“and why’s that?” he questioned with authority.

you bit down on your bottom lip to contain your smile at his grumpy face. “just lady things, joel. you wouldn’t understand.” you said confidently, knowing that would shut him up.

“right — yeah, uh, okay. s’uhm.. yeah..” he stammered, clearing his throat awkwardly and stubbing out his cigarette. he stood up quickly and took his empty mug to the kitchen counter, rinsing it out under the tap and leaving it on the drying board.

you smiled to yourself.

you weren’t stupid. you knew how you affected joel.

and a sick and twisted part of you secretly loved it. loved to watch him squirm in his seat when you draped your legs over his lap on the couch. loved watching his face when you wore a particularly revealing shirt just to see his eyes attempt to avoid your cleavage.

you knew it was wrong — of course you did. but that didn’t mean you couldn’t have your fun.

you followed joel into the living room and plonked down next to him on the couch. some cop show or other played on the tv in front of you both while joel scowled at your proximity.

“what?” you asked in an obnoxious tone, shifting closer just to annoy him. “you know, most people would be happy that i chose to sit with them.” you continued. “because i’m fun. but you.. you act like i’ve got the plague or somethin’.”

joel let out a long, unamused breath through his nose — eyes not moving from the car chase on the tv. “ain’t bout no.. diseases you may or may not have. just tryna watch my show s’all.”

you giggled at that.

joel had a way of being funny without intending to. his grumpy responses to your sarcastic comments never failed to make you laugh even after a bad day.

you arched your back into a stretch, arms going over your head as you let out a long, deliberate hum of contentment. your shirt rode up a little on your thigh in the process and for a split, tiny second — you caught joel looking. just a quick glance out of the corner of his eye before it darted back to the tv as if nothing had happened. his jaw ticked, a muscle there jumping as he lifted his hand up to rub at the back of his neck.

gotcha miller.

“you think you’re so slick, don’t you?”

joel’s expression shifted to confusion. he blinked as if he wasn’t quite sure whether he heard you right.

“slick?” he repeated, turning to look at you properly.

you deliberately brushed your leg against his thigh when you turned in your seat to face him. a smirk crawled it’s way onto your face as you tilted your head to the side, ponytail falling over your shoulder.

“uh huh. slick.” you confirmed like it was obvious. “thinking that i don’t notice how you look at me. that i don’t notice how badly you try to act as if you don’t want to fuck me, joel.”

joel stood up suddenly at that, panic and embarrassment flooding his features. his ears turned pink and he shifted his arms between crossing over his chest or dropping them to put his hands on his hips. “that’s.. you can’t say things like that, kid.”

“no?” you asked, voice dropping lower — feigning innocence.

“no.” joel replied quickly.

you stood up slowly and made your way over to him — steps calculated and oozing with confidence. “so you don’t wanna fuck me?”

joel took a step back, swallowing dryly. “no! — fuck, kid, this,” he gestured wildly with his hand, trying to make sense of the insane shift of energy. “— is inappropriate — is — is wrong.. i.. this is not a conversation we should be having.”

you huffed and stopped in your place a couple feet away from him. you rolled your eyes. “come on, miller! my mom and dad are dead, it’s not like they can do anything about it!“

he winced a little at your insensitive words, shaking his head in an attempt to stay firm. “i think it’s best i go out for a little bit and when i come back, we’re going to forget this conversation ever happened.” he stated, trying to keep his voice from shaking. he turned on his heel and started to walk toward the door.

frustrated and horny, you called after him. “what is it, huh? you afraid you can’t get it up or somethin’?”

joel didn’t reply, just kept his back to you and continued walking.

you continued, following him across the threshold as you talked. “whatever.. you’ll regret it later when you’ve gotta jerk off like a sad old man in bed.”

joel’s shoulders tensed as he stopped in front of the cabinet at the front door, rummaging through the various keys in the ceramic dish.

you stood behind him, rambling on like a child begging for a new toy. “poor joel, always tryin’ to be the good guy even if it means deprivin’ himself. that’s fine, you do what you want.” you shrugged your shoulders. “guess i’ll have t’just find some college boy who’ll—”

joel turned around quickly, grabbing you with a rough calloused hand around your throat — not enough to cut off your air, but enough for you to feel his rage. you squeaked out an attempt to question his actions but before you could try again, he had you backed against the wall, knee firmly slotted between your legs to keep you from moving.

“just don’t know when to shut this damn mouth huh?” he brought his hand away from your throat and up, squeezing your jaw, forcing your lips into a pout and pressing his point. “don’t know how to take no for an answer, ain’t that right?”

it was as if all the breath had left your lungs. you looked up at him with wide eyes — not wide with fear, but with shock. this man — joel miller — quiet, calm and collected, was actually putting you in your place? not just huffing or rolling his eyes at your bratty comments. “joel—”

“no.” he cut you off quickly, pushing your head back against the wall with a soft thud. “you’re gonna listen t’me. always walkin’ round here like ya own the place, like you’re payin’ these goddamn bills. like you’re the one puttin’ food on the table and takin’ care o’me. well, that’s gon’ change now.”

you gulped and nodded the best you could with his firm grip on your jaw. he scanned you for a second to make sure you were listening, to make sure you weren’t about to run your mouth again, before dropping his hand.

“okay?” he asked.

you nodded your head quickly. “yes.”

“sit down.” he nodded orderly over to the couch.

you didn’t hesitate in complying.

you weren’t sure whether he was going to murder you or fuck you, either way, you weren’t about to argue with him.

you took a seat on the couch, body rigid as you lowered yourself into the seat. you clasped your hands together in your lap, looking up at joel as he walked toward you.

he stood in front of you and ran both hands down his face before speaking up, voice thick.

“if we’re gonna do this, there’s some rules you gotta follow.” he stated.

you nodded, looking up at him curiously.

“rule number one. this ain’t a.. relationship. i ain’t your fuckin’.. boyfriend or whatever, we just get each other off when we need it. if i need to get off, I’ll tell you, same goes for you.” his voice was low, ashamed like he couldn’t believe he was actually agreeing to this fucked up little situation with a girl young enough to be his daughter.

you swallowed at his words but nodded, showing him you understood.

“rule number two, we don’t tell anyone about this. and i mean nobody. not your little friends or people at school. this stays between the two of us.” you nodded quietly, but obviously that wasn’t enough for Joel.

“jesus.. cat gotch’ya tongue, girl?” he grumbled.

you nodded your head quickly. “sorry — yeah, i promise.”

“good.” he continued. “and last rule, when we ain’t.. busy, i don’t want no talk about what we do, we save that for when we are busy. other than that, nothing else changes.” he finishes. “oh — and no kissin’ — and ya sleep in your own bed.”

you nodded one last time. the thought of following all these rules was incredibly overwhelming but arousing at the same time. the fact you could just let joel know whenever you needed cock was so incredibly taboo and hot at the same time. this man who was practically family, your dead parents best friend being your fuck buddy? god, it was so wrong.

you bit down on your lip and stood up, walking over to joel slowly. “so.. you said i can tell you whenever i wanna get off, right?” you inquired, voice dropping softer.

joel’s eyes darkened a little but he nodded anyway.

you brought both hands up to his chest, feeling the hard muscles beneath his flannel. you switched your voice to a whisper, standing on your tippy-toes and leaning into his ear. “well, what if i said i needed you right now?”

joel’s stare lingered on you for a long moment, heavy and unreadable, before he finally let out a rough exhale through his nose. he rubbed a hand over his beard like he was already tired of himself.

“okay,” he muttered under his breath, almost too quiet for you to hear. his hand came up to cover one of yours on his chest, patting it awkwardly before setting both of them back down by your side. “said ya.. needed it, so sit.”

he jerked his head toward the couch, jaw clenched hard enough to crack a goddamn tooth. you bit back a smile and made your way to the couch, sitting back comfortably against the cushions — thighs squished together in a measly attempt at hiding how desperate you were for him.

he let out a long sigh, muttering something about how he couldn’t believe he was doing this before walking over to you, toeing his boots off in the meantime.

“this ain’t complicated,” he stated flatly, tone almost businesslike — as if he were laying out a deal. “you said ya wanted somethin’, so i’m givin’ it. that’s all this is gonna be between us. nothin’ more, nothin’ less. ya got it?”

“mmmhm,” you hummed, nodding and saluting in mock seriousness. “sir, yes, sir.”

he looked at you humourlessly, rolling his eyes and grinding his teeth. “thin ice, kid.” he warned.

as much as you wanted to continue teasing and bratting him, you were pathetically horny and in need of some kind of touch on your sopping pussy, so, you decided to play along. “right. sorry.”

“now,” joel cleared his throat awkwardly, shifting between his feet and avoiding your gaze. “you on any, uhm.. birth control, or anythin’?” he croaked, like it pained him to ask.

shit.

of course you weren’t.

you’d always decided against the pill — too many complicated symptoms and side affects, it was always much easier to just fuck with a rubber or in a pinch, have the guy pull out.

“uh.. no, sorry.” you answered, bringing your thumb up to you mouth to bite down on your nail.

“christ.” joel grumbled, clearly at the end of his tether. he reached into the back pocket of his jeans, fishing around until he found his wallet, pulling it out and opening it.

you snorted, allowing the grin that was tugging at your lips to take over. “you keep your rain coats in your wallet? sure that’s not expired, old man?”

joel ignored you, slipping the condom wrapper between his two fingers and tossing his wallet on the couch. “stand up. over the arm of the couch, don’t make me repeat m’self.”

you did as he said. standing up from where you were perched and walking at a pathetic pace toward the arm of the couch, deliberately taking your time. you looked down and noticed the prominent bulge around Joel’s cock. he obviously wanted this a lot more than he let on.

“jesus christ.” he muttered, stomping over to you and grabbing your bicep, yanking you to the arm of the sofa and pushing you down roughly until your cheek was flush with the leather — back arched over the couch perfectly. he kicked your legs apart gently but frantically, making you yelp.

“joel!” you complained, huffing into the couch.

once he had you in place, he took a second for himself. he stood behind you silently and you could feel the weight of his stare. the conflict and desire fighting one another.

you suddenly felt bad for teasing him. at the end of the day, this wasn’t exactly what he signed up for when he said he’d take care of you after your mom and dad. he obviously didn’t mean to catch feelings— or whatever it was he felt for you. you broke the silence, voice softer this time, not carrying the edge of a bratty comment.

“i do want this, joel. i mean, it’s pretty obvious you want it too.” joel didn’t answer, just exhaled quietly and shakily.

after a beat he brought his hand up to your hip, gently squeezing it — testing. your exhaled with a soft hum, moving to arch back into his touch but he removed his hand before you got the chance — before things got too touchy-feely.

“these shorts,” he started. “take ‘em off.”

your cheeks warmed. of course you wanted this, but the thought of taking your shorts off yourself, baring yourself to him made you feel shy all of a sudden, but, nonetheless, you complied.

you stood up momentarily, reaching for the waistband of your shorts and trailing them down your legs until they hit the floor. you could hear Joel’s sharp exhale when you revealed your bare bottom half to him — no panties. it wasn’t like you weren’t wearing them to be sexy — just for comfort, but right now, it felt so intimate.

you bent back over the couch once you’d stepped your socked covered feet out of your bundled shorts. you nuzzled your cheek into the couch cushions, waiting to hear the sound of a belt, but you didn’t.

instead, you heard joel dropping to his knees behind you, his joints cracking in the process. “fuck,” he mumbled, both hands hesitatantly coming up to cup your ass cheeks. you groaned softly when he spread them apart with his thumbs, feeling your arousal coat your inner thighs as a result from the completely erotic position you were in — how completely at his mercy you were.

“this all f’me?” he rasped, breath fanning over your sensitive folds, causing a shiver to run up your spine.

“no, s’for the mail man, joel.” you responded dryly because even in your vulnerability, you couldn’t allow him to have full power over you.

you felt a harsh smack land across your right ass cheek, making you hiss and jolt slightly. “what did i tell ya bout that mouth? huh? cause i don’t mind leavin’ ya here like this, kid.”

“sorry.” you mumbled because the thought of him leaving you here dripping made you feel sick to your stomach.

joel hummed, clearly feeling on top of the world about having you so compliant like this. bent over the couch, pretty pussy and tight little hole on display just for him. eventually after a lot of consideration, he leaned in, licking a long stripe from your wet hole up to your clit. the action made you groan in relief. you clung on to the couch cushions, short, painted nails digging into the fabric while joel explored you. his tongue started to lap the juices at your opening, lewd sounds of slurping beginning to fill the small living room.

you gasped when Joel groaned against you, the vibrations sending a charming jolt of pleasure through you. “oh, joel,” you moaned, panting heavily as he continued to taste your juices. he pulled back just for a second to check in.

“how’s that? feelin’ good, sweetheart?” he asked smugly, already knowing your response. nonetheless you responded, this time without any brattiness in your tone.

“yes, joel.. feels so good.” you whined, pushing your hips back into his face, seeking more of his attention. he chuckled low in his throat, the sound rumbling in his chest — but he didn’t argue.

he leaned back in and explored through your folds, his face buried between your ass cheeks as if they were made to accommodate him. he nosed your clit, licking his way up there as he knew that was clearly where you needed him the most. he kitten licked at it first, turning his tongue into a point as he did so and then finally, he sucked it into his mouth.

the pleasure rippled through your entire body, sparks of sensations you’d never felt with an other man before. “oh my god! joel — fuck!” you called out, but Joel was just too busy to reply. it felt so fucking good it brought tears to your eyes. quickly the only thing you could do was sob into the couch, whining about how fucking good he was and how it was right there and please don’t stop. your thighs started to tremble either side of his head, body visibly starting to shake.

“oh, god,” you hiccuped helplessly. “you’re gonna make me cum.”

your broken noises prompted joel to double his efforts — nosing your clitoral hood up to suck directly on that little button, grabbing handfuls of your sweaty ass cheeks. he was embarrassingly hard in his pants, about five minutes away from creaming them just from the taste of your pussy alone.

god, he’d wanted this for so long. you, sprawled out in front of him, pussy so ready for his cock, and now? now it was finally happening.

“joeljoeljoeljoel!” you chanted pathetically, feeling your peak get closer and closer. “FUCK JOEL! YOU’RE GONNA MAKE ME CUUUMM—”

your pussy spasmed, arousal gushing from your quivering hole. your orgasm hit your like a goddamn truck. ecstasy completely took over your entire body, your eyes rolling back and mouth opening in a silent scream, not even being capable of moaning from being so focused on that release. everything went blank for a split second but your vision quickly swam back into sight. joel sucked you more gently through it — little kisses and gentle flicks from his tongue — careful not to overwhelm you.

after what felt like forever, joel pulled back, face red and wet from you. the room was silent aside from your pants ands little sniffles.

“listen we don’t have to do anym—”

you interrupted. the thought of having sex right now felt pretty overbearing, but the thought of not feeling Joel’s cock was even worse. “no! please fuck me, joel.”

“jesus..” he muttered, clearly still not used to hearing this girl he’s known ever since she was born talk so bluntly.

“please.. I’ll be a good girl...” you mumbled almost incoherently. your body still buzzed from your orgasm, but you were still so ready. so ready for him to ruin you all over again.

your words seemed to break joel.

he was on his feet in a flash, his flannel shirt was off in seconds, almost certain a button broken from how desperate he was. he reached for his belt, unbuckling it with shaking hands and tugging down his jeans and boxers. he fisted his leaking cock, god he hasn’t been this hard in.. ever really. he grabbed the Johnny he’d previously pulled out and opened the wrapper with his teeth. you obviously heard the tear because your voice perked up again.

“wait— no.. please, wanna feel you raw.” you murmured, twisting your head around lazily to look up at hm, eyes then sneakily trailing down to take in his huge fucking dick.

“are you outta your damn mind? so unsafe, kid, jesus christ. ya can’t just—”

“okay! okay, i get it, i don’t need a lecture right now. what i need is your dick so, please.” you gestured with your hands a sort of “get on with it” signal.

joel shook his head, muttering something incoherent before taking the condom out of the packet. the damn thing had probably been in his wallet for the past seven years, but it would do for the time being. maybe if this little arrangement between you two would stick he’d try and talk you into birth control.

he rolled the condom on with clumsy hands, cock already drooling into the latex. once he was fully sheathed inside, he gripped your hip and lined himself up with your entrance.

the first graze of his now safely covered cock head made you jolt forward slightly, like your body wasn’t ready for something of the size but mentally you were just too desperate to stop him. you parted your legs lazily to make it easier for him to enter you.

“joel,” you whined, the overstimulation getting to you.

“yeah, m’right here. we’ll take our time, yeah?” he murmured, notching his tip at your entrance and pushing in slowly. the stretch almost made you recoil at first, the pain was sharp and sudden — your wall’s resisting him at first despite your arousal. “tight little cunt.” he hissed, tightening his grip on your hips.

“hurts, joel.” you complained quietly, gasping and pressing your face further into the cushions. you whined out — overwhelmed and in pain.

“breath through it, in and out, baby girl.” he offered softly, caressing your hip and pushing his hips forward until he was fully sheathed inside of you. you felt overwhelmingly full, walls instinctively clamping down.

“ah — fuck,” joel cursed, his member twitching inside of you. “squeezing down on me so goddamn tight.”

“c-can’t help it.. ohh..” your voice was high pitched and frantic, so unlike before when you were running your mouth.

joel gave you a shallow thrust — pulling back an inch and then rocking his way back in. it grazed your g-spot so well that you had no choice but to moan. your hands frantically searched for something to grab, settling for the fabric of the couch.

“yeah.. that’s the spot.” he groaned, setting a steady pace of gentle rocks of his hips. you nodded your head the best you could, another sob breaking free.

“yeah, right there, joel.” you hiccuped. joel stroked your hair sympathetically, as you cried it out.

“just feedin’ this pussy, baby girl. fuckin’ ya full.” he murmured, head dropping back, clearly lost in his own pleasure. he brought his hand down underneath you, middle finger finding your clit. he circled it lightly, being mindful for the sensitivity.

“oh, i can’t.. can’t cum again, joel,” you cried out. “m’clit’s so sensitive..” the feeling was so intense that your legs started to shake again. that stimulation on your g-spot and clit was sending you over the edge too soon.

“ohh, baby i know. clits all puffy, huh?” he cooed, speeding his thrusts up despite your complaints. “just cryin’ f’me, this pussy. just fuckin’ soakin’ m’cock, sugar.”

“ye-ah..” your lip wobbled. his cock felt so fucking huge inside of you and the wrongness of this whole situation made things ten times more intense. the way joel spoke to you as you cried, thrusting in and out of your cunt so deliciously too. you reached behind you, hand fumbling around until it found Joel’s. you knew he didn’t want anything lovey-dovey. he made it very clear that this would just be getting each other off, nothing more, but despite your efforts to stay smug, you couldn’t help but seek for some comfort. you could feel your orgasm approaching and it made you want to wail. the thought of pushing through another one felt just as overwhelming as pushing a baby out.

Joel’s fingers intertwined with yours as you cried through the build up. he whispered sweet encouragements to you throughout, most likely feeling his own release approach.

“push through it, i know, i know it’s a lot.”

“easy, baby girl, easy.”

“come on baby, needa feel ya make a mess on this cock.”

and you did. god, did you make a mess on his cock. you cried and practically yelled through it, your pussy spasming and rippling around his base pushing his own release to the peak. his hips stuttered, steady thrusts turning messy as he emptied himself into the latex.

the next few minutes was pure silence aside from your shared panting. joel slid his softened cock out of you minutes later, throwing his clothes back on and leaving briefly to dispose of the condom. you stayed bent over the couch, hole a mess from your own spend.

he returned a few minutes later, and to your surprise, his shuffling behind you and eventual kneeling down was to clean you up. the first touch of the damp cloth on your vulva made you flinch forward. joel soothed you silently, awkwardly stroking your hip as he cleaned your juices from your folds and inner thighs. when he finished, he grabbed your sleep shorts and tugged them back up over your ass.

you stood up on shaky legs, turning to say something, but joel was gone before you got the chance, striding out to the kitchen.

you stood in place. confused and slightly hurt.

you knew this was the agreement. just fucking, nothing more, but still.

you shook your emotions away and made it over to the couch again, adjusting the cushions and laying down, tugging a blanket over you. your core ached slightly like it was adjusting to the feeling of joel not being in there.

tears filled your waterline but you refused to let them fall. you swallowed with effort, trying to wash away all of those feelings but it was no use, the tears were flowing now. not dramatic — just.. vulnerable.

joel shut the kitchen door shakily, as if putting space between the two of you would fix the line he crossed. would fix the way he’d just corrupted the girl he promised he would look after. he promised to be a damn father figure to.

he was sick.

a sick, perverted old man who should have never given in to this.

and the whole rules thing? what the fuck was that about? treating you as if you were just some piece of ass he could have whenever he needed it.

he headed straight to the alcohol cupboard, grabbing the first bottle he could find. he didn’t give a fuck what it was, as long as it was strong and would help numb some of those thoughts running around his head.

Jack Daniel’s, perfect.

he poured the brown liquid into a glass frantically, spilling some of it in the process. he picked the glass up and knocked it back, swallowing it and feeling that burn in his throat, the sensation settling in his belly.

he repeated the action before pouring one more but this time, taking it with him to the living room.

he wanted to stick to the agreement. to leave you alone. it was probably what you wanted.

was what he thought when he walked into the living room and was met with you curled into yourself on the couch, scratchy blanket pulled over you.

joel felt his heart break right then and there.

he stilled, his blood running cold.

“baby..” he started, making his way over to you.

you straightened up at the sound of his voice, your cheeks warming in embarrassment. you opened your mouth as if you wanted to come up with an excuse, but nothing came out.

“oh, sweetheart,” joel placed the glass down on the coffee table and made his way toward you. you looked up at him with red-rimmed eyes — skeptical. he sat down on the end of the couch, opening his arms in a gentle invitation. “C’mere, I’ve gotcha.”

you crawled into Joel’s arms like a broken child, perching yourself right on lap, face tucked into the crook of his neck. you allowed yourself to sob into his flannel shirt. “i’m sorry.” you hiccuped.

“hey— hey, don’t you apologise.” joel warned, rocking you gently in an attempt to soothe you. “i’m sorry, baby. i shouldn’t have.. handled that the way i did.”

you clung to him tighter, wrapping your legs around his waist. joel rubbed soothing circles into your back, hand travelling beneath your shirt and up to your shoulder blades — not suggestively, just feeling.

after what felt like hours, you pulled back, face blotchy from tears. you studied Joel’s face for a second, taking in the deeply rooted crease in his brow, his brown eyes wifh those dark, long lashes that you envied in your girlhood. without thinking, you reached out to cradle his jaw, stroking it with your thumb, and before you could stop, you were leaning in.

joel allowed your lips to meet his in a slow, non commanding kiss. at first, it was just exploration, two mouths brushing one another lazily but then it progressed to Joel’s tongue sliding into your mouth.

you hummed contently against his lips and when he pulled back, he actually smiled.

weakly, sure, but there. you leaned your forehead again his and returned the look, sniffling out a little giggle.

“we broke the rule.” you murmured, but there was no real concern behind it.

joel looked at you for a beat longer than necessary and then,

“fuck the rules.”

, his lips clashed with yours once more.

sooo.. what do we think? this is pretty different to the fics I usually write but I hope y’all like it!