#this piece of garbage

It had started off with a text. Jake had woken up groggy and craving coffee when his phone had beeped on his nightstand. As soon as he read it, he leapt out of bed and hurriedly searched for clean clothes that he could throw on.

It was from Ezekiel, and it read: everything gone wrong. at library. plz halp.

When Jake was sure he had everything, he jumped into his truck and nearly sped all the way to the Library. He practically fell out of his truck and stumbled along with support from the walls into the Annex. On the main, center table there was a note in Ezekiel’s messy scrawl. This one read:

Went thru backdoor. Location set if anybody wants to join me. ~ Ezekiel, Master Thief

Jake growled to himself as he searched for some sort of weapon that he could bring with him. They had told Ezekiel countless times that they shouldn’t go on missions alone - ever. Sure, Flynn broke the rule, but Flynn had literal years of experience over the rest of them. The point was, it was just safer to use the buddy system.

Giving up on finding a suitable weapon, Jake walked towards the Backdoor. He checked the globe to make sure the positioning was correct before he shoved through the door.

As soon as he stumbled through it, he was hit by an immense cold. He’d just pushed through an old ice-fishing shack onto the middle of a lake. He was about to question what the hell Ezekiel was doing on a frozen lake when he heard a cracking sound beneath him. The ice beneath him was weak because winter was dying out, but he knew the water would be freezing cold. He slowly and carefully turned back to the ice-fishing hut and took a tentative step towards it. He wrapped his hand around the handle and tugged.

Nothing happened. That little son of a bitch had somehow locked the goddamn Backdoor, and Jake was stuck out on the ice. He was about to yank out his phone to call the bastard when the ice groaned beneath him again.

He was able to get out one last curse word before he fell in.

As soon as Jake was submerged in the water, his muscles tensed up and his body screamed in pain. Luckily, Jake had been quick enough to take a deep breath and made sure to keep his mouth shut despite his body’s initial reaction of wanting to gasp in air, but if he couldn’t find the hole he’d fallen into quick, it wouldn’t mean much of anything.

He swam in the direction he was pretty sure was up and nearly sighed in relief when the top of his head bonked against the ice. His hands flew over the sheen layer that separated him and breathable air, but he couldn’t find any opening or crack. He’d apparently floated away from the opening when he fell in.

Panic soared through him. Already his muscles were starting to cramp and ignore his commands. His lungs burned, and he could feel his body trying to hyperventilate without the air to do so. His heart was pounding against his chest, flying faster than a humming bird.

Jake forced his eyes opened and kept them open despite the burning that the dirty lake caused. Using the top of the ice, he guided himself towards a patch of light that he could barely make out in the murky water and kicked upwards when he reached it, breaching his head above water. He gasped wretchedly and clung to the side of the ice, his fingers only inches away from the ice-fishing hut.

Jake stayed still, trying his best to catch his breath and force his body to calm down. In what was probably a minute, he could feel his breathing slowing down to a more normal pace, and his heart wasn’t beating as fast anymore. His fingers were already numb and curled up uselessly into loose fists.

Summoning strength he wasn’t sure he had much left of, Jake kicked strongly with his legs in order to make it easier to hoist himself onto the slippery ice. He gained a few inches until his waist was on the ice and used the rest of his strength to swing up one of his legs and gain the leverage to roll away from the hole.

He stopped on his back, face pointed towards the sky, and took in steady, quick breaths. His heart was fluttering in his chest again, and he rested a hand over it. Jake could feel his entire body shaking, and he knew it had just as much to do with fear as it did the cold. Dark images of his body being discovered months later on the shore of the lake flashed through his brain uselessly.

When Jake had caught his breath again, he struggled to try to get to his feet. He could only manage to be on his hands and knees and crawled carefully back to the fishing-hut. He prayed that someone had unlocked the Backdoor when he reached it and fell against it. He pushed himself up on the hut until he was just on his knees and used his hand to tug the door open. He nearly sobbed in relief when the Backdoor gave way, and he was able to fall into the safety of the Library.

“Did you enjoy your fishing trip - Stone?” He could hear Ezekiel’s voice over his head and then felt too-warm fingers clutching at his face to lift it up so Ezekiel could stare at him. Jake figured that the fact that his vision was so blurry that he was really only able to make out the blob of black that was Ezekiel’s hair and then the other blob that was Ezekiel’s face was probably not a good sign, but he was too tired to mention it. “Holy shit, what happened?!”

It was then that Jake remembered the reason he’d gone through the Backdoor in the first place. With shaking hands, he weakly tried to shove Ezekiel away from him as he mumbled, “Get offa me, ya bastard.”

“Jake, I didn’t-,” Ezekiel tried to say, but he was suddenly pulled away and replaced by what appeared to be Eve’s face.

“Jones, what the hell happened?” she asked, trying to tug Jake back into a kneeling position.  He felt knew hands join hers that were probably Flynn’s, and he was quickly tugged to his feet. His legs decided they weren’t going to help Eve or Flynn, and they were forced to practically carry him over to the stairs where they sat him down in a sitting-up position. New hands which he was sure were Cassandra’s appeared on his cheeks, pushing his sopping wet hair out of his face in order to inspect his (probably) unfocused eyes.

“I-I didn’t,” Ezekiel was stuttering, “it was just a joke.”

“Help me find Jenkins,” Flynn’s voice said. It was strained, and Jake found himself a little surprised that what it was strained with was worry. He would’ve laughed if he could; he never knew Flynn cared so much. Two pairs of footsteps faded away.

“He doesn’t look good at all,” Cassandra was murmuring, and her hands were still rubbing over his face. They were making him feel really warm, and he only belatedly realized it was because she was using magic. Normally he would’ve shoved her away, but, well, he’d forgive her for this one time.

He was sure Eve probably replied in some fashion, but he was already out cold - pun definitely not intended - before he could catch what she said.

~~~

When Jacob woke up, he quickly realized he was in one of the Library’s spare rooms that Jenkins kept open for injury-emergencies. Jake was a pretty regular visitor, so he knew the room well enough to realize the flowers that decorated his bedside table were not part of the room’s usual decor.

He groaned slightly, trying to stretch his stiff muscles. He sat up and swung his feet over the side of the bed, but he didn’t dare try and stand. He’d probably already made a big enough fool of himself when he stumbled in half-dead; he wasn’t about to add ‘immediately collapsed onto the floor upon waking up’ to what he assumed was a long list of things the team would make fun of him about in what he hoped was the not-so-nearby future.

Upon further inspection of the table, he noticed little gifts from the team. Cassandra had left him a full box of packets for hot-chocolate. Eve had left him a handy pair of ice picks; always preparing for the future, that one. Flynn, bless his heart, had left a completely impractical, full-on life jacket leant up against the bottom of the side table. Jenkins had left a cup of tea which was still steaming - probably because magic.

Ezekiel had left one of Jake’s favorite books and what appeared to be a very particular artifact that Jake had had his eye on the last time they’d visited the Smithsonian together. A little note was taped to it and it read:

I paid for it and everything. I’m really, really sorry. You weren’t supposed to fall in, you idiot. ~ Ezekiel, the guiltiest thief.

It was definitely the most thoughtful thing Ezekiel had ever done for him, and it made him realize just how sorry Ezekiel actually was. Jake happily picked up the old vase and cradled it in his hands. He grinned.