Where you grew up as mc and caleb’s childhood friend, you fell in love with caleb ever since you first saw him, a dashing smile on his face that made your heart beat unaturally fast. You became fast friends them, having move into the neighbourhood when you were 7, itching for adventure in a new place, with new faces.

You were a year older than mc, and a year younger than caleb, making her the baby of your trio and you both always made sure she was well-taken care of.

Come second grade and you and him were in the same class, with mc in 1st grade. Despite this, he never left her alone, every lunch break and reccess was spent with her, feeding her her favorites and buying her snacks while you tagged along awkwardly, not really knowing how to add yourself to an an already well-established dynamic.

But you really wanted to be their friend.

Although they dont seem to share the same idea , your presence sometimes being ignored for their other childhood friend. A boy with the prettiest green eyes that seemed cold around everything but mc and whose ice evol was much cooler than whatever you could bring to tthe friendship.

Like the third wheel you are.

You watch them sometimes walking ahead of you after school, their shadows melding together in a perfect trio. It makes you question if they even wanted you around…

It got even worse in high school, although zayne had moved away for college, since he graduated first. It didnt feel like you had gotten any closer, Mc had her own cliques that were more like….her. Preppy, trendy, the popular type that gets all the boys and just..cute all over, while you stood there out of place in your old worn-out sneakers that you keep because you loved that pair and comfy sweaters with holes that you’ve picked out of anxiety, overthinking your place in this friendship you’ve had for years.

do they even like you?

These thoughts plagued your mind like a bee hive, buzzing incessantly, but It seems too late to questioned that, the countless sleepovers, secrets you’ve all spilled during ice cream hangouts, food court trips, and visits to the beach, it all must be proof of your closeness to each-other—isitnot?. You still have the pretty shell caleb had given you that day, it was a beautiful white conch shell, one of your prized possessions still sitting on your caleb shrine…

Yes.

You have a caleb shrine.

That’s not weird at all! Dont people have collections of things they love??!

….

Okay maybe you are a little weird for having a small shrine of him….

But you promise that there’s nothing weird going on—-! You don’t follow him around or anything!

Sure you were a bit too clingy, but you like your new friends, even though there are others, the three of you together felt special, like the three muskateers or something..

You loved making plans with them for little study sessions, and you pretend not to notice how they often have them without you, you pretend you dont feel the pain of being left out everytime your scroll past their recent photos they’ve uploaded on Moments.

Matching outfits,matching drinks..where they in a relationship? You wonder, the caption says otherwise “studying for finals with my bestie~❤️“, your finger hovers over the photo, wondering if you should heart it.

But then you see it, a piece of your pink sweater sticking out of the supposed ‘perfect couple’ photo and you feel yourself shrink in disbelief.

You were there with them, yet they didn’t even bother to take a picture with you..when did they take it? When they were sure you weren’t looking so you wouldn’t ask to be in it?

Looking through both their profiles, you bite your lip, noticing the lack of you in them, even though you had them in yours.

You don’t think they hate you, after all you’ve spent your entire childhood with them. You three were the best of friends.

Yet it seems not everyone at school shared the same idea, as though you ruined the perfect duo that they were, a stain on the Prince and Princess of Linkon high.

‘they look soooo perfect for each-other’ you remember some people gush over them whenever they were picked to play as beauty and the beast for the school play.

And you?

A fucking broom.

Not even the main one, just a background broom.

They were always so in sync with in each-other, his eyes always look for her in a crowd, always the first to call out her name and wait for her no matter how late she was. Makes sure to win her gifts at amusement parks, and the stupid claw machine you’re sure is rigged. Until he comes to win her plushies to add to her ever growing collection while you wait there with your hands empty and heart waiting.

He would pack her favorites and keep snacks that she likes just in case she got hungry. He always—always shared his answers with her, taking the time to teach her material she couldn’t wrap her head around and there to console her when she failed.

but you?

You never first in his eyes.

you were never his first priority. But— you were okay with it, after all they were close before you even came around, being the youngest you understand caleb’s soft spot for her. But you can’t help but be jealous when they would walk ahead of you, running after them, calling out and playfully hitting them for not waiting up, but the slight pang in your chest never left. The gifts he would give you—a cute sheep plush. At first you thought it was sweet precious even- the happiest you’ve ever been at fifteen—only for the hope to crush you when mc comments that she had a duplicate of that so she gave it to caleb instead.

The same plushy you begged caleb to give you after he was done winning mc multiple prizes at the arcade, but one look at her puppy eyes and he told you he would win you one the next time.

They didn’t even invite you the next time.

You held back tears that day-smile wobbly and nodding.

You never expected much after that.

You nodded when caleb told you he couldn’t wait for you, ‘ i need to walk mc, she gets scared of alleys when walking back home—you understand don’t you?’, you held your tongue when they didn’t wait for you at lunch, their food done and finished as you just arrived, you didnt even speak up when they shared your umbrella when it was raining on the way home, you had to use your own bag to cover yourself because caleb was worried mc would get sick from the rain.

Yet you couldnt help but like him.

You feel so stupid for liking someone that will never have eyes for you. Too busy watching out for his little angel in case she trips over her own two feet for the third fucking time in a row.

But you can’t help it, he was never really rude to you, he was just too focused on taking care of mc, that’s what he was used to.. he did his best to include you in things, conversations that where you discussed topics you were passionate about and he would just listen, midnight calls where he comforted you after terrible nightmares and anxiety attacks.

A hill you both found after a day of exploring, one that overloooks the beautiful sunset you both love to watch and unwind. A spot that you both promise was your ‘special hiding spot’, a spot he hasn’t even told mc. You go there every time you feel nervous about an exam, or if you’ve had a fight with one of your parents and he was always there, to comfort you and be by your side and encourage you with sweet words—

Making sure you both share a ride on the rollercoaster, even though he rode the teacup with mc for the sixth time that day while you only got one ride before she started complaining she wanted to go home. You didnt want to, asking caleb if she can go home by herself so you two can enjoy yourselves on the rides a little longer but he shut that down quick ‘pipsqueak can’t walk home alone’ he says, grabbing her hand ‘ i’ll be back’

He never came back.

You waited for hours until the sun went down, two cotton candies ignored in your hand while you waited for his message, only for him to say that mc and him were watching her favorite show and he couldn’t come back and for you to walk home alone

By yourself.

But you can’t hate him. You wish you could..

He was always so kind, so helpful, he never raised his voice at you and wasn’t the type to leave you behind…

Unless it came to mc of course.

You liked him for who he is as a person, a hard-working grandson who loves his family, who uses his free time volunteering at the animal shelters, and teaching the local kids how to play basketball.

Which is why—you decided to finally do it!

You were gonna confess on your last year of senior high.

You don’t want to hide your feelings anymore, you wanted him to know just how much you liked him.

So on the 1st week of October, you stood in front of him, nervous. It was a cool friday, a nice breeze flowing through the air and drying the sweat the dripped from your temple.

The sun was setting behind you, it was quiet since there aren’t that many students around. You—with your messed up, homemade chocolate that you stayed up all night the day before, so many trial and errors, chocolates you are very sure you burned twice before finally, finally getting it right-

Only for the chocolate to spill all over the floor, you let out a squawk before a curse leaves your mouth, banging your leg against the side of the table, it leaves you reeling in pain, you almost cry out in the comical fashion, because— what the fuck!?

You just wanted to make chocolate for the boy you love!

You heave a heavy sigh, no use crying over spilled chocolate(see what i did there?), you start over, eyeing the amount of dishes growing in the sink and mentally crying at the consequences that you will be washing all dat.

You sigh in exhaustion and look over your ingredients, you have enough to make one more batch and you hope to whatever god was out there it goes right this time.

And it’s like luck has shined down upon you, because it turns out perfect!—you actually cry this time because damn it, it took you like 6 fucking hours to make 5 chocolate hearts!

You packaged it up all nice and cute, a orange heart-shaped box with purple ribbon, you thought it fit well since it was October for the color scheme but honestly it’s because the purple reminds you of his eyes.

And now you stand before him. The boy of your dreams for years, you stutter just to get the words out “ w-will you go out with m-me, Caleb?!” You say the last part out a little loud, cringing at the volume, it was silent for a while, before a warm hand pats your head, you open your eyes, not realizing how hard you had them clenched, he takes the box you held out and smiles, so bright “sure!”

You blink, not sure you were hearing right—you were so sure he was gonna reject you…a big smile shows on your face, maybe this time..

He’ll choose you first.

You don’t realize how much you’ll regret thinking those words.

When you both got together, everyone was shocked, like they didn’t expect it, nervous eyes darting over between you and her. were they looking for animosity? maybe her giving you both the cold shoulder. But she didn’t react when caleb broke the news to her, ‘congrats guys!’ Was all she said as she laughs, not a hint of anger in those angel eyes of hers.

But you saw it—

A slight quiver in her lip, the shakiness in her eyes, a strained smile.

But you couldn’t feel bad, ‘you’re such a bad friend’ you hear a terrible voice whisper in your head. But it’s not fair. She’s had him her whole life and now he’s finally yours—! You ignore the guilt creeping up your throat because it wasn’t fair…

Everyone had mixed thoughts about your relationship

Mc’s group of friends avoided you, talking about you behind their back, how you ‘stole her one and only light’ and mc didn’t do anything to refute, she stayed silent, as though…agreeing to it all.

People at school were not expecting you both, you can tell they saw mc with caleb instead, he didn’t say anything to defend you, you didn’t say anything either.

At first it was fun—the first few months were bliss, you went on dates, walks to the park, and multiple trips to the beach, Mc was always there of course, for some reason caleb always had a reason for why mc just had to be there, but you didn’t mind. It wasn’t like it was on purpose right? Besides-It felt just like old times when the three of you would go everywhere together. She wasn’t ruining your dates becuase she didnt want you two alone—right?

Right?

You had never once said anything bad about mc. You couldn’t. Wouldn’t. Shouldn’t.

Because Mc was Perfect, she was an angel and she could do no wrong, even if she ignored you on purpose, made everyone pick her over you and always, always wanted caleb to help her with whatever the fuck she needed helping because she was oh so helpless while telling you that ‘you can do it yourself, you’re big enough’.

But now you want nothing more than to curse her name a bit.

Because she just. Kept. Appearing.

A few times was fine—then it just kept happening, she was already there despite you not telling her where you two were going and you suspect caleb was telling her where you two where headed, maybe she asked, but you were frustrated at the blatant lack of privacy that you both had a fight about it, yelling that you both need to have your ‘alone time together’ since you’re in a relationship now and mc can’t just keep barging in. he tried to calm you down until you couldnt take it anymore,

“she just wants you for herself caleb?! Can’t you see? Shes trying to break us apart!”

…

At those words you saw caleb’s eyes darkened, you freeze. It was silent now, heavy breathing leaving you after all the screaming.

“Don’t you EVER say those words” he hissed, you flinched back, why was it so venomous?

“She didn’t do anything to make you so paranoid, so stop being so fucking delusional and understand that you can’t monopolize all my fucking time and energy”

.

.

He left right after but you stood still, shook to your core, it was the first time seeing him so…angry.

——————————————————————————————————————————

After that incident it became tense between you and caleb, you tried to bridge that gap with jokes, good morning messages and texts to take care of himself and snacks he likes but he didn’t seem like he was all there, he zoned out often, not listening to you speak for minutes, gazing at something you couldn’t see.

You will never truly have his attention. A voice bites in your head.

It sounds just like her.

You were sure she was laughing at you.

You had a bad habit of being clingy to things and people you love so you can’t help it if you wanted to be around him all the time…but maybe it wasnt helping him.

Mc started avoiding you and caleb got worse, he became quick to anger, losing focus on his tasks and school work leaving his grades to plummet and a screaming session where his coach yelled at him for 30 mintues straight when he couldn’t get his head in the game.

His friends who were worried for him, said that maybe he should break off the relationship, take some time fro himself since he started becoming like this when you got together. At first he refused—calling them rude and crazy for even suggesting that but then they threw their explanations at him and he couldn’t help but think ‘they’re right’.

You were clingy—well you always were but it tripled when you got together now he couldn’t go anywhere with you and you liked having calls at night that messed up his sleeping schedule.

You wanted to go somewhere all the time, he didnt have time for anything else as though you were trying to make for something—lost time perhaps?

Study dates, study dates—study dates!vyou always wanted to have one in the library after school and ask him for help on subjects he’s sure you aced at.

You were apparently very weird—they saw you saving candy wrappers from sweets he would discard and rumours of your shrine containing pieces of his hair and tissues he used to blow his nose.

Okay that one was kinda creepy—but cute at the same time.

But he understood their concerns, he sees it everytime he looks in a mirror, baggy eyes and pale skin, his muscles were disappearing since he couldn’t go to the gym without you tagging along and it was frustrating him that his phone was blowing up at all times of the day and it’s been days since mc spoke to him. She was angry and he didn’t know why, countless messages sent only for her to leave him on read.

He doesn’t notice the messages you sent. The last one reading ‘i love you caleb, please get some rest’.

She finally messages him, late at night with one sentence.

“Break up with her, then we’ll talk”

The coming weekend, he comes over to formally end your relationship, ‘ it’s better to do it early man’ his friends say. So here he is, at nine in the morning.

To break up with you.

At first he didn’t know what to think, why was pipsqueak telling him this, she offered no explanation despite multiple messages from him asking for a reason, he thought his friends were kidding when they said to break it off but now…

He liked you, you were sweet and kind but…that was all. You never struck him as someone to catch his eye through the years you’ve grown together, too plain, too simple. meanwhile mc flourished under his watchful gaze, growing more beautiful and he couldn’t help but feel his heart quickened everytime they meet eyes.

Why did he even accept your confession? Was he bored? Or maybe he was tired of waiting for her…

But if she was messaging him like this—then maybe it meant…

He knocks and waits for a while. Practicing the words in his heads, shoving down the guilt he’ll feel knowing it’ll break your heart but he can’t take it. Mc’s face flashes in his mind and he steels his resolve.

You finally open the door and is surpised before a smile takes over “come in” you usher, but he stays put, “this won’t take long” he says fists clenching, why does he feel so guilty?

“Huh?” You tilt your head, sleepy and still in your pajamas, “yn..” he breathes,

“Let’s break up..”

.

.

.

At first you didnt process it, mind moving slow from the sleep clouding you, before you laughed “oh caleb, it’s too early for jokes” your smile strains.

“I’m serious yn” he sighs, eyes tired. “ I want to break up with you”

It was quiet, the nieghbourhood was silent on a weekend like this, you stood there in shock and disbelief, the crushing weight of your heart dropping to your gut at his words “b-but…” tears well up “why..? W-what did i do?” You look up at him, bottom lip wobbling “it’s not you…you didn’t do anything” he looked away, “it’s…me i’m sorry for leading you on, i dont think i was ready for a relationship” his shoulders sag as he said this, like a weight has been lifted—or added?

You open your mouth to say something but he interrupts—“ so let’s just…end this okay? I do love you yn but i don’t i ever saw you like that..” your breath hitched was it mc again? You wanted to scream, was it mc you thought of?!

It wasn’t fair! Not fair at all!

NOTFAIRNOTFAIRNOFAIRNOTFAIRTHATSTUPIDBITC—

“Okay” you smile, hoping your tears don’t fall, making you look more pathetic “but…” you shove down a sob “ we can still be friends right? Just like old times?” You shiver, but it’s not from the cold.

“ yeah “ he nods “i’ll..see you around yn” he turns and walks away, leaving your house, leaving you, all alone.

Like many times before.

Months pass and it’s already june, and the entire time he doesn’t see you, doesn’t look for you too busy patching up things with mc and keeping her happy, enjoying his incoming graduation, partying the days away, too drunk and satiated to think how much of a hypocrite he was, a fucking liar.

It wasn’t until the last 2 weeks of school did he notice how you didn’t show up anywhere, you were always active around school, helping with events and staff but now even your friends came up to him to ask how you were.

He tried to remember the last time he saw you, but all he could see was your face full of pain on that morning, when the morning dew permeated the air and he stood in front of you to break your heart into little pieces and leaving you with the shards to fix.

No one had seen you, no one checked up on you and you don’t respond to anyone’s texts.

He tries to send a few during class, checking every period to see if you’ve responded, you usually did and panic only fills him with every hour.

what happened to you?

Are you ok? Were you hurt?

Where are you?

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NEXT PART

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Should i make a part 2? (Might be a time skip with lots of steamy scenes tho lol)