The sound of the tent opening on the other side of the fire startles you, making you tense where you sit on the ground, staring into the dark as Lea slowly emerges from the tent. It takes them a moment, blinking over at you, no fire to light the camp due to your neglect, and unlike you, Lea can’t see in the dark – and there is no moon overhead, just dim stars barely gleaming through black clouds, a shroud cast over the forest tonight.

“It’s fucking freezing,” is the first thing Lea says, their voice still thick with sleep, and they stumble around to the small stack of wood the two of you had made earlier in the night. “What the hell are you doing?” Lea snaps, giving you an annoyed look as they crouch beside the fire in front of you and begin to rebuild it.

You don’t answer. You don’t really know, anyways.

Lea grumbles some more as they stand and fetch fresh tinder, and you just watch as they manage to coax the fire back to life, cupping their hands and gently blowing on the embers until it all reignites. The heat from the fire is immediate, and you glance away from the bright light as the camp is illuminated once again.

Lea sits back on their heels for a moment, before completely dropping down onto the ground, crossing their legs in front of them. You realize they’re shivering, their nose and ears painfully red, slightly purple, and you look down at your own hands and you’re not even sure you can loosen your grasp on the flask, your fingers locked painfully from the cold. You hadn’t even noticed the cold. Probably because you’re drunk.

“Give me that,” Lea says roughly, and you flinch as they reach over and snatch the flask from you, forcing it from your stiff hands and squirreling it away out of sight. “You asshole. Can’t you just let me sleep? A few hours is all I ask.”

You feel your lip curl, and you stand abruptly, glaring down at Lea.

“Fuck you,” is all you say before turning on your heel and stomping off into the woods.

You hear Lea call your name but you don’t stop. Unfortunately, you are inebriated, and it’s dark and the ground is frozen and you’re staggering every few steps, bumping into trees and tripping over rocks and sticks and your own two feet.

You don’t make it very far before Lea grabs you and steadies you. You don’t resist, your head spinning, the two of you just standing among the trees, Lea’s hand tight around your forearm. You glare over at them, but Lea – Lea looks scared, their fingers digging into your arm, their breath quick and panicked, obvious as it fogs in the night air around you.

“You need to be by the fire,” Lea says, pulling you gently back towards camp.

“I’m fine,” you growl, but the vitriol isn’t there, and instead it comes out as a pathetic whine, making you wince.

“I know. You’re always fine,” Lea says, their back to you now as they lead you like a child. You scowl, staring at the back of their head, their bun messy and tousled from sleep, and after a few moments you feel your scowl fade, and you lower your gaze, guilt worming its way through your chest.

The two of you sit side by side back at the fire, Lea carefully feeding it until it burns too bright to look at, the heat making your whole body ache as you begin to thaw.

Lea doesn’t say anything else, but you can see them nervously twisting their thumb ring, their elbows resting on their knees.

“Sorry,” you blurt suddenly, feeling the need to say something.

Lea sighs, before looking over at you, their face glowing gold in the firelight.

“I know,” they say. “You always are.”

You grimace, staring down at your hands. You suppose that’s fair.

Lea sighs again, and you glance over at them, still twisting their ring. But they’re looking at you, their brow furrowed, and you can still see some of the fear from earlier, laced with concern, and – and something else, something you don’t understand, something that makes your throat tighten and chest ache.

“I’m sorry,” you repeat, bowing your head, unable to look at them anymore, unable to hold their gaze.