Circular Logic Trap
I feel like I get into this trap (a circular one) where if I repeat the same patterns, I get the same result-- go figure. BUT Asking how do I do something different, or pick a different thing to do, without burning out gets me the answer "don't think about burning out" or "just think positively about it" Like. What. ? ie- I am very isolated in my small town. I have literally zero friends. There are VERY few third-spaces available to me. Socializing is already incredibly exhausting for me, let alone trying to do it by engaging (regularly) with an activity I have no interest in or find actively unpleasant. Suggested: Try volunteering or getting a second job Issue: There are very few places available near me for this in my rural ass community, open on weekends which is my only reliable free-time. PLUS The options available to me I find actively unpleasant. Suggested: Don't think about it as unpleasant Issue:...wtf. How does that make sense. "just like a thing you don't like" is not...a solution? How do I...make myself do that regularly, and not get burnt out from trying to ignore the yet more unpleasant stuff I have heaped on the already unpleasant stuff that I deal with (badly) daily? I don't get this. This doesn't seem like therapy. I don't like bars. I don't have animal volunteering stuff near me. I don't like gyms (nor do I have the money), the run-club doesn't meet on weekends, the hiking club is for retirees and meets on Wednesdays, the political peeps only meet via Zoom and never -do- anything (regularly), the food pantries only operate once in a blue moon on a Saturday, Habitat for Humanity has lost my application to volunteer SIX TIMES and hasn't called or emailed me back...Library isn't open on weekends or weekdays after 5pm. I'm like. I'm out. of Ideas. And a good chunk of those ideas were already veering into "activities I actively find unpleasant and anxiety-inducing" and I don't think I can just....think happy thoughts about them until I like them.
