6 and 14 for orin and durge asks
Hello! Thank you for the ask!
6. Does your Durge consider Orin a sibling? Do they think of her as family at all?
Pre-tadpole no. Post-tadpole no. Post-fighting Orin, yes. Which is very odd for my Durjh, because they've very very much shed their past identity as an aspect of themself. They know that some people see their past self and their present self as parts of the same but they do not, and they have a very strong reaction when people try to use, say, some kind of tie to their past self to try to have sway over their present self. They reject that: they are not their past self, so the ties of their past self do not bind them.
Pre-tadpole they were Blood-kin and competing to be Bhaal's bestest baby (at least until Durjh took the lead entirely) so I think the best way of describing it would be family but not siblings. After Durjh developed the plan and started working with Gortash and Ketheric the distance only grew.
But with what they find out about Orin, with the fact that Orin spent her life in the cult and was denied any chance to see who she might be beyond that, with how, when presented with the facts of her history, Bhaal overrode her will and forced her to Slayer up regardless... yeah, Durjh feels a deeply fucked up twisted kinship with Orin. They, like Orin, have had their will overridden because Bhaal wants a murder done in his honour. They, like Orin, were denied much outside the cult - in their case because the Urge rose up and they killed their parents. And by this point, Durjh has a deep belief in the right of people to choose their own paths - they've seen how being controlled and denied that choice has hurt their friends. So they are deeply indignant on Orin's behalf. They feel deeply sorry for her and wish she could have had a chance, as she gave them, to be otherwise. They are very aware they are possibly the only person to grieve her when she's dead.
So yes. Pre-tadpole they're family but not siblings, to Durjh's perspective. Post-tadpole they have their weird lingering disgust-hatred of her.
And then they find out about her mother-sister, and see her denied choice, and even as they fight her, they wish they could fight Bhaal. Because very suddenly they see a very close point of connection between them, right at the point they can no longer do anything but kill her. And they hate it.
While my Durjh does not want to have kids, if they ever adopted a kid, they would offer them "Orin" as a possible name, due to a ... somewhat childish desire to give Orin another chance? To let her live again, outside the cult. To give her the fresh chance that she gave them. To, by proxy, give her a fresh start.
Orin, of course, would probably find this rather patronising and awful if she knew. It is probably for the best that she never has the chance.
14. Was there anything Orin and your Durge really admired about each other?
I think Orin admired Durjh's single-minded ruthlessness. You know that Animorphs quote about ruthlessness? This one:
"People don’t understand the word ruthless. They think it means ‘mean.’ It’s not about being mean. It’s about seeing the bright, clear line that leads from A to B. The line that goes from motive to means. Beginning to end. It’s about seeing that bright, clear line and not caring about anything but the beautiful fact that you can see the solution. Not caring about anything else but the perfection of it."
- Marco, Book #30: The Reunion, pg. 71 (by K.A. Applegate)
That's Durjh pre-tadpole. A little post-tadpole too, but in a different direction. But pre-tadpole, this is very much Durjh and I think Orin respected that utter, perfect drive. I think she was disappointed by the simplicity of their murders and I think she... hm. I do think she envied how easy of a time Durjh had in getting Bhaal's attention? She went to such elaborate extents for a drop of Bhaal's attention and Durjh could knife someone in an alley and get a pat on the head. Bhaal playing blatant favourites. But, in turn, I think she did see where Durjh's utter ruthlessness served a purpose and I think she admired their perfect precision of it - as long as it wasn't pointed at her.
Meanwhile... I think Durjh did admire Orin's ability to plan, even if they found what she planned for deeply frustrating. I tend to think of Durjh as... kind of a complete disaster? My headcanon runs that they were largely normal until puberty, when the Urge kicked in and I think they were horrified when they murdered their parents - but not horrified that they had. Horrified by how easy it was, horrified by the fact they didn't feel guilty. And I think that, that realisation of how easily and remorselessly they could kill, I think that fucked them up deeply, because up until that point, they'd been a normal kid, with normal expectations. And now their parents are dead by their hands and they don't feel guilt and they know they should feel guilt, they've felt guilt over other things they've done wrong, why don't they feel ashamed of this, why does murder feel right-
I think they followed Sceleritas because they were at a complete loss. I think they murdered because it was one thing which conclusively felt right. I think they planned to murder the world because if the world was dead, no one else would ever have to know that they murdered the parents they loved and felt no guilt over it. I think it was that singular focus because they had to find something to hold onto, a clear light to follow, because otherwise they'd wander off the tide-washed causeway and into deep water and drown. I think, until they had that murder the world plan, there were times when they struggled. But... what else did they have? They'd murdered their parents. They'd murdered so many. So they doubled down. They can't go back. They must go forward.
(Thoughts which post-tadpole Durjh echoes.)
And then there's Orin, and her joy in murder. I think that re-contextualised some things for them, and, just as there were times they struggled, I think Orin's joy was it's own lighthouse to them and gave them some good days too.
I think, on some level, they liked having her as second, because she found wholeness in the chasm they'd thrown themself into for lack of anything else. They were plummeting, occasionally finding points of light or rocks to adjust trajectory from, while she was flying, free and happy. And if they could grasp onto her, keep her joy close, maybe that could be a way out of the pit. Maybe, some brief times or when they were in the pits, they could inhabit her joy instead of their own empty, utter purpose. I think they were exasperated by what she chose to plan for, and I think their admiration of her joy didn't stop them from wishing she'd be more efficient and less elaborate - but I think her joy was a shining star to them, and something they dearly wished they could have or knew how to find. To pre-tadpole Durjh, murder was peace, it was purpose, but it wasn't joy.
Anyway. This is all to say: I think they admired Orin's ability to plan and the sheer joy she found in murder and in planning murder.