The rain hit the wooden roof, slowly at first; each rain drop distinguishable and enough to make Leonard flinch. And then the heavens opened up and it was like hundred of antiquated guns firing bullets onto a tin surface.
He wanted to cover his ears but he couldn't move.
His body ached from the position he had frozen in. His fingers squeezed at the edges of his other hand's digits over his kneecaps, his legs folded up against his chest. He was reminded of himself as a young boy, in the same position on his grandmother's porch, rocking in the warm Georgia air. He had stopped rocking a long time ago and that was when he went from going mad to being completely numb.
The Paces Pares people, of the smallest planet the Enterprise had encountered had promised them just what their name suggested. Peace. They were empathic people, communicating easily with impressions and feeding off happiness and contentment.
Leonard had thought they were too content.
Jim had laughed hooked an arm around his waist and pulled him in, "This is exactly what we need. Content." He had sighed into the word like one would finding just the right spot under warm blankets.
What they hadn't known was that the Paces Pares used their easiness as a shield, blocking out the bitter truth of their world from outsiders, not that they encountered many. The land that they lived on was as psychic as the people themselves but of a more volatile nature than anything they encountered. If there was a spectrum for this sort of thing, the people themselves and their home were on total opposites.
Spock passed out after two hours on the planet and Jim had screamed into the communicator for a beam up as the Earth shook.
Only Spock was beamed back in time.
What seemed like days could only have been hours as the Paces Pares got as close to panicked as Leonard had ever seen them. Their Earth, they explained, using words they had never had to utilize before, was angry. Required sacrifice. They made a motion with their hands that Leonard did not like at all. Next to Leonard as the words were fed into the wheels of Jim's ever moving brain, his husband paled.
It took seconds for him to regain his color as he demanded a way off the planet, a way to get their comms working, a way for the Paces Pares to bargain with their world.
There was no way, they said. No way that they would all survive. They could not do it. They were no strong enough. Their bright and glowing visages shimmered. If Leonard looked hard enough he could see a shadow nearly swallow their forms.
It was hours after that when Leonard and Jim had their first fight. Minutes later and Jim stormed off along, seconds after he collapsed.
"We are sorry. So sorry. Sorry." The Paces Pares whispered as he gathered Jim up and led him to the small structure. "He is the strongest being here. Content."
And so Leonard did everything, trying to ignore the pressure at the back of his neck, just above his spine. The way he felt listless, like a whole had swallowed every thought he ever had about the future. His hands shook as he brushed fingertips over Jim's face. He curled up next to him, he kissed his forehead, his jaw, his neck.
"Please, please."
At some point, everything turned grey. He doesn't remember slumping over sideways but as he wakes up it's to a room too cold and pins and needles all up and down his body.
Leonard doesn't need to touch Jim to know he's gone.
There is no grief because there is nothing left. So he just gathered himself up and watched as the shadows formed shadows and the breath came out of his mouth like thin tendrils of smoke.
The rain stopped and still Leonard has not moved.
His husband woke up with red eyes and a downturned mouth. Jim sat up and arranged himself like a baby finally allowed to move on his own, unsure of where his legs and arms should go.
"What have you done to him?" Leonard asked because there is a monster that has settled in Jim's bones and he wants it out.
"We did not expect what we received. There is a balance here and now it can not be maintained." The voice was not Jim's voice. It was too high, too wrong sounding. Leonard cannot flinch because he is still numb but at that moment he wanted nothing more than to rear back.
"We ask you a question, Healer. If you were to know that every form of you and your Leader were to end up like this, would you choose a different path?"
His voice was hoarse when he spoke a second time, refusing to look at Jim. "Like fate?"
"That is a Terran concept. But it will suffice. Yes. Even if we were to give you another chance. Turn back the clocks to restore what was, would you choose it?"
Leonard thought of the pain that he felt and would feel in the future, underneath the hazy cloud of shock only to be magnified. He remembered Jim on the day they meant, nothing but a kid with a burden. He remembered him on their wedding day, and on countless days since then.
"Yes." He told the being. "Over and over again."
Jim adjusted again, his body slumping. "So it will be."
There is no flash of light or shaking of the Earth like before. One moment Leonard is in a position he has held for too long with a mind becoming rapidly more blank and the next he is in a hard plastic seat, his head pounding and the tumultuous heaving of his stomach signifying the great need to vomit.
"I may throw up on you," he says to the twenty-six year old Jim Kirk, wearing two day old clothes with bloodstains and a cocky grin promising a world of fuckery to anyone who gazes upon it.
Leonard swallows hard and sits back. He wonders if they truly are doomed. But the thought is like the nausea, it's strength ebbs away as he settles. Besides, he just bought himself six years to figure out a way to make sure they never encounter the Paces Pares. And he's going to make the most of it.
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“This is where it all begins, Bones. Everything starts here, today.”
Jim swings Bones' hand as they walk up the mountain on July 15th, St. Swithun's Day. It's also the day after their graduation from university.
"Does it?"
Leo, newly christened Bones, has no idea what he's doing. Walking up a mountain in the glorious morning after of a drunken night with Jim Fucking Kirk. The man he always thought to be the love of his life if he had only the courage to say hello. And the night of his graduation, he did.
And suddenly Leo can see it. His whole life holding hands with Jim Kirk. On the many St. Swithun's days to come.
Jim's hair is a straw color in the sun and his eyes are the brightest blue. His grin is infectious and even this day, this day that is so on the threshold between so many things, pales in comparison to Jim's grin.
Bones pulls their hands up to his mouth and kisses Jim's knuckles, caught up in it all.
"Whatever happens tomorrow, we had today; and I'll always remember it.” Bones says as they crest the top of the mountain and the view is spectacular. He can see their future from the top. Too bright and just beyond the sun.
Jim squeezes his hand and bites his lip, as if he can see it too.
-
The quotes come from David Nicholls' amazing novel One Day. And there will be more of this.
She isn't quite what you'd call... sentient. She's certainly kept alive by the love and care her crew shows her. And by the sacrifice her boy made to keep them all safe.
But knowing that, she cannot move, will not function until she knows that her captain is alive. She shudders, her metal contracting and expanding with the stress of his death. Everything is too quiet when she is finally docked and she cannot cooperate with repairs until she is given a reason to want to fly again.
Scotty wanders the ship and whispers encouragements. She loves him almost as she loves the boy. They have a separate bond, though.
Spock comes aboard and walks around with his hands behind his back, listening as Scotty's voice dips and then goes a few octaves higher in response to her First Officer's questions. Not even for him will she budge and they have a bond as well. They both were there for the boy's last moments.
It isn't until the comm comes in from her doctor, her lovely Doctor who she has seen weep for her Captain as she wishes she can weep for him, that Jim in fact is alive, that the Traitor's serum has worked, that she sighs in relief. She allows Scotty to repair her, knowing that in time she will help repair the boy.
will you write a thingy of jim trying to dodge out of bones' checkups from STID and bones finally drags him aside, but jim is really pissed off and badgers him why he's doing it, and bones tells him he loves him and is just worried about him and it disarms jim?
"We're in the middle of a crisis, Bones, I can't just fucking waltz into sickbay." Jim say into his comm, scratching his head with the top of it.
"You have approximately two hours to before get to that rock. Get your ass down here." Bones' voice, growly and angry came through the speaker.
"What? I can't hear you, Bones? You're breaking up." He disconnects the call and tosses the comm onto the table in the ready room.
He knows he should go see Bones. He can't stop shaking. Little tiny vibrations up and down his spine. Stress? Anxiety? He's got a pounding headache and a sinking feeling in his stomach that makes he want to vomit every time he relives the past 24 hours. He's not okay. But he doesn't have time not to be.
He dodges Bones' three other attempts to get him to come down to see him, including calling Spock and telling him to goad Jim into it. He ignores them, of course.
He doesn't get so lucky after they get Khan, after Bones nearly blows up on a star. Jim throws up in the bathroom off his ready room. His heart is pounding and his muscles so tense and taut that his body aches.
He's being pulled out of the bathroom and pushed down the hall into the turbolift before he can process it. Everything is spinning as he slumps against one of the walls and Bones' is gentler this time as he eases him out of the lift and into medbay.
"I don't have fucking time for this!" He yells. "You know this. The crew knows this. Just let me alone."
Bones closes the door on the smaller examination room and instead of his patented glare, Bones' eyes are glassy, his face screwed up with grief, not anger. "We can't keep doing this." He says.
"What?" Jim asks, and swings his legs on the end of the bed.
"Almost losing each other. I can't-"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
Bones closes the distance between them and kisses him lightly on the lips. Jim's frozen in place. Bones? This? Interested? His brain can't keep up and instead he just blanks out for a second, only aware of how soft Bones' lips are and how he wanted this, yes, he did, for years. Why now?
He must have said that out loud because Bones pulls back, inches away. "I love you, you idiot. And I didn't want you do some fool-brained thing without knowing that."
He shakes his head. "You can't love me."
"I do."
"But I love you." Jim's thoughts stutter as his brain comes back online.
Bones' lips quirk into a smile. "I know."
The conversation and the gentle way that Bones takes care of him, slowly patching up his broken knuckles, giving him a pain killer hypo, carries him through the rest of the nightmare that follows.
And he thinks it's not fair. Not fair that they didn't get to spend time together, to love each other. He thinks this as he's dying and he realizes how scared he is to leave Bones behind.
jim and bones going on their first date to a fancy restaurant and jim not telling the waiter about all his allergies because he can’t think of anything other than how good bones looks tonight or i hope he kisses me after dinner.
dinner is served and they’re eating, chatting easily about different things and suddenly jim can’t breath. his face is swelling and bones goes into doctor mode, calling for an ambulance as he searches for jim’s epipen and when he finds it, drives it into his leg, relived when jim starts to breath again.
"you idiot! why didn’t you tell them you were allergic to damn near everything on your plate?" bones is asking as he’s checking jim all over, his hands cupping jim’s face.
"maybe you shouldn’t be so distracting." jim says full of the same cockiness he had before. leonard isn’t sure if he should kiss him or throttle him.
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Oh hi der :3 Once you get this, you must post 5 wonderful and truthful things about yourself and then tag 10 of your fav followers. Okie now byeeeee ( no tag backs!
1. I talk a big game about wanting to meet my favorite celebs but then would probs be reduced to a pile of fangirl goo when actually meeting them.
2. I am a book hoarder. It's pretty bad.
3. I am currently obsessed with the song Timber by Pitbull and Kesha.
4. I cry at that stupid song from Oliver and Company every time.
5. Sometimes when I listen to Requiem for a Tower by Escala, I pretend I'm in an epic promo about my life.
6. I am terrified of doctors and needles.
7. I ate pancakes and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every day from first to seventh grade.
8. I'm a mommy and a daddy's girl. And an only chid.
9. I couldn't whistle until about two years ago. It's one of my proudest achievements.
10. Have a strong desire to adopt kids when I'm ready.
bones going home to see his momma for christmas vacation and bringing jim along because jim has no where to go and bones says it's to protect his pretty face and liver but jim knows it's because bones can't stand the idea of him being alone for the holidays
while they're there, bones finds his daddy's old record player that has an inch layer of dust but jim is determined to get it to work so he spends three hours cleaning, polishing, and rewiring it. he dusts off an old record and puts it on, a slow melody playing out in the living room
bones holds out his hand, a smirk on his lips and asks "may i have this dance?" and jim laughs loudly, the kind that shakes his hole body before he wraps his arms around bones' middle and lays his head on bones' broad chest. they sway together, the christmas lights giving a softer glow to the room and their hearts beating together.
