#the scribblers

Total Word Count: 4301

Words Written Today: 852

Something I wrote today:

“Why, I was beginning to think you lost.” The driver said, jerking awake with a shudder and a yawn.

Total Word Count: 3448

Words Written Today: 546

Something I wrote today: 

Total Word Count: 2895

Words Written Today: 492

Total Word Count: 2386

Words Written Today: 679

Something I wrote today:

Instead of Writing my Book

I’m not sure that this is exactly week 2, it’s probably actually week 2.5 or week 3, but this is the second journal I’m putting up to talk about my progress on Scribblers so it might as well be week 2 for as much as it matters.

As you have probably seen I’ve started doing accountability posts whenever I write, including a word count for the day, total word count, and a sentence or two that I wrote that day (whether I’m proud of it or not). On days when I don’t post accountability posts...well those are days that I didn’t write.

Beyond getting that 7 page outline done and getting a handle the direction this novel is going, I haven’t had the most success actually sitting down to write by the schedule I worked out. I’ve got approximately 4 single space 12 pt. typed pages and a handful of handwritten work that I’m not keeping track of.

I actually have 5 “working nights” a week during which I’m supposed to sit down and write at least an hour and half (which might not seem like much but after an 8 hour work day it sure feels like a lot, and when you do it consistently it’s amazing how quickly the time adds up) as well as one of those 5 days when I’m supposed to take my happy ass down to my favorite cafe and sit for anywhere between 3-5 hours, drinking coffee and getting my book written.

That’s what I should be doing right now, and very clearly (to myself at least) I am not.

Life is hard, guys--she whines--and sometimes it gets in the way of following your dreams. To some extent I can make excuses for my lack of progress over the last several days or explain away my lack of production. I’ve been sick, and after I got sick my computer when belly up for several days as I mentioned, and after my computer went belly up I had family issues that need to be dealt with in a focused and adult manner. (To be specific, my husband who I have been separated from for the last 4 months has moved back in with me and I was helping him getting his shit back into the apartment. Yay!)

The fact is that sometimes, like last night, there are things that are slightly more important than sitting down and getting your writing done. Sometimes you’re trying to make a relationship work, finish a term paper, take care of a project at work, or any number of other things. Sometimes you have kids and dogs and friends and parents who want you to see you and know you still draw breath. (I don’t have kids or dogs, btw. Those are just examples.) And that’s okay, that stuff is important. Every weekend I find myself stretched between the lovely group of people I’m lucky enough to have care about me vying for my time as well as cleaning my house, paying my bills, and writing my novel.

I don’t feel bad for spending time doing those other things. That’s adult life, and I have obligations to myself and to others. What does make me feel bad, is when I realize how much down time I do actually have. How much of that down time I spend watching television, playing stupid games on my phone, or doing nothing at all.

The fact of the matter is if I put constraints on my own time, I would find that I could easily reach my writing goals and still have time to do all of the other things in my life that demand attention and time. I am privileged in that way. When those things come up, like being sick or spending time with my husband, then if I’ve spent my down time wisely, I should have no reason to feel guilty about giving those other aspects of my life priority. But I do feel guilty, and the reason is I’m not spending my down time doing what I should be doing.

Anyway, I’ve decided not to lie about or inflate the amount of work I’m actually getting done on this blog. I’m trying to be real. I’m an amateur and I’m learning to do this as I go, and this blog is part of the way I’m teaching myself. I’m a very imperfect artist and person and I’m striving to get better. So in the interest of honesty: I spent an hour and a half playing Enter the Gungeon and listening to music instead of writing today. I spent the half hour after that trying to learn how to to sing the first verse of Eyes, Nose, Lips in Korean. And I spent the last half hour writing this instead of working on my novel. That’s the honest truth.

Tonight I’m going to spend time with a friend I haven’t seen in a while and we’re going to see Captain America: Civil War and probably go for pie afterward and discuss. It’s going to be really fun and I’m not going to spend the evening beating myself up because I did that instead of writing. But what I am going to do is set time aside to work tomorrow. And when I do that, you’ll be hearing from me again.

Total Word Count: 1512

Words Written Today:  654

Something I Wrote Today: 

Total Word Count: 362

Words Written Today: 362

Something I wrote today: 

He told himself it was the eyes of the dead, and that comforted him somewhat. If the dead were with him, at least he was in fine company.