#thatkinfeelwhen

Tumblr: "omfg, you're a dogkin/wolfkin! That's so usual and common and you're like everybody else and not special in any way!" Real World: "OMFG YOU BEHAVE LIKE A FUCKING DOG!!! YOU'RE NOT HUMAN AND I HATE YOU FOR BEING DIFFERENT AND I WON'T GIVE YOU A JOB AND I WILL ENCLOSURE YOU AT THE PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL AND GIVE YOU MEDICINE UNTIL YOU STOP SLEEPING IN WEIRD POSITIONS AND REFUSING YOURSELF TO USE FORKS!!!!"

Since I was born, a important feature about me is an obvious ressemblance with dogs. Until the age of 8 yo all I talked about was dogs. My mom believed it was because an casualty during the gestation: she was feeding my grandfather's german sheppard. The dog had otitis and she inadvertently caressed its wounded ear. So, the dog felt pain and attacked her on the belly and on her arm. I was 6 intrauterine months when it happened. I always felt this episode as some kind of curse because my grandfather decided to sacrifice the dog after that. Another matter: My grandfather gave me, when I was 7 yo, an also 7yo bitch. We had some problems with my grandmother's alcoholism those years and my bitch was the wight I spent most time together. I crawled to her doghouse - she was bigger than me - everytime things got complicated at home and slept on her black fur to avoid the family issues. My family always were unloving and I had my bitch to provide me hugs when my grandmother attempted suicide in front of me when I was 8yo. So I learned about solace with a dog instead of learning this by humans. So I got grimaces of dog. Because I was emotionaly raised by a dog. I think its very understandable.

"You need to use tools to put food in your mouths". This was the information that killed any kind of hope I once had to understand humanity . How could I simulate this deep need for something I couldn't care less? I couldn't! So this is the story about how I gave up trying achieve "human passability" because of forks, knifes, spoons and chopsticks (yeah, I live in an various-origins-from-extreme-east neighborhood, so chopsticks are a thing!) First, an anthropological view: the society I was raised in gives a lot of importance to the capacity of a child to manage food-tools autonomously. It's a minor requirement of the great set of abilities you must detain to configure as a "so growned up already!" by your grandmother's opinion. After the initial joy, to use your recent-achieved ability becomes an obligation. You would be a total jerk if you refuse yourself to help your mama and keep using your hands to eat your peas is not tolerable anymore cause now you are 5yo and you're "already a grown up!" It's a very bad thing to try to test how much your mom's love for you resists in front of your continued refusal to use the appropriate tools to drive your food from your plate to your oral cavity. No, it doesn't matter if this dispensation should be done carrying little green balls with an almost-flat  surface. It doesn't concern anyone that the path of this noble delivery, when you're 5yo means,  literally, 20 cm. And don't even start with the "hygienic argument": food-tools are not hygienical by any point of view. In fact, there are so many tuberculosis's bacillus in any fork than are in my shoes. Or my hands. And a 5 yo child eating with a spoon doesn't make less of a mess in comparison with a child eating with its hands. Especially if the hypothetical child is left-handed. So, with no reason whatsoever, you humans use food-tools and get really angry at those who don't comprehend the need of this purely-social tacit agreement.  I knew I was otherkin since I was a little boy. In fact, the first time I was sent to a shrink and got pathologized by school-family-doctors (I was 7yo) it was because I growled to an annoying friend at school. But I only found myself free to eat with my bare hands at public spaces two months ago. Now I am 31. I was already tongue splitted and my eyes were already black colored. So I was living as an non-human beast for the parameters of the society I was living in, but still was difficult to abandon the use of food-tools. I was at an sushi and seafood restaurant with my girlfriend and I was too tired to afford the use of chopsticks. Then I gave myself a social liberation to attempt a meal without the absurd obligation of using food-tools.  First, as expected, I was ashamed of what would the humans around me think about my nasty behaviour. Then I realized they would probably think I was weird.  As They ALWAYS Do No Matter How I Behave Humans know we are not like them.  They are very poor verbalizing what they feel, but humans have esthesis. And they cannot explain why and how, but they know we are not like them. They feel this "something about" in our energetic signatures/soul/aura/whatever you call it. So, there's no reason to be so hard on ourselves trying to "pass by" among the humans. We won't pass. Because we are not humans. And that's okay! Just try not to exagerate and, I don't know, don't dig at your's mother-in-law rose bushes. It would be too much! But try to bark or hiss sometimes. It aliviates a little bit and you wouldn't be an exemple of normality anyway! And, please, try to eat without food-tools if you want to. Maybe it would be relieving to you like it was to me! <3

Where are the broken-hearted wolfkins and dogkins with today’s episode??? Who cried the guts out? I did! I hope Arya find her awakening soon! Nymeria, come back!!

i dont even know what to say

-hugs anon if they’re ok with being touched- ~Skyline

SAME ANON SAME and you just wanna backflip out into space bc holy no fandom thats not me.-Skyline