The closeness was suddenly so overwhelming that Aaron had to lower his head and just—breathe. Breathe in the musk, the heat, everything that was Andrew underneath all of it. And breathe out, pushing it away before the haze at the back of his mind pulled him under. It was there, lurking, dragging at the edges of his control, reminding him of things he didn’t want to remember.

Shinigami

 Prologue Pt.1 - First They Burned Him

It starts with red. The red of his father’s hair as it sticks with sweat to his forehead and turns a rusted shade matching the blood dripping from his knuckles. The red of Lola’s lipstick twists into a smile as she slides the knife home between the ribs over and over again. The red of his mother’s blood pouring from her body as they tear her apart piece by piece and laugh while Romero holds him down, forcing him to watch.

It’s all so red that he feels like he will drown in it — that he already is drowning and choking on his mother’s screams. Because in the end this is his fault.

{Read on AO3}

Youth is when the soul grows - when pain becomes real and love diminishes. But friendship makes youth easier. Lighter.

The Foxhole Court Fic Rec IV Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V A ★ indicates fics I would reread every day if I had no life

Shinigami

Prologue Pt.2 - Then He Forged Himself Anew in the Flames

Neil waits and watches everything that will give him the edge he needs. He takes note of every guard shift, what keys go into whose hands, who watches him with blatant interest, who doesn’t bother to look at him at all, when the chimes of pins change every couple of months, everything. Neil waits and watches for the moment they slip, and he will seize the mistake and escape or die trying.

Neil Josten is yet another name in a long list of identities used to hide a boy long since dead from a past blood had been spilled to forget. Essentially, he is and always will be nothing. And yet there has always been one thing that made Neil Josten real: music. After his mother’s death, music and singing were the only things tying him the threads of reality by the strap of a well-worn guitar. Too bad he’s pretty sure that it’s also going to be the thing to kill him. Especially when Kevin Day, international rock star and blast of Neil’s past comes waltzing back into his life demanding he joins the upstart and infamous band EXY as its new vocalist. To make matters worse, Kevin’s unofficial shadow, Andrew Minyard with a rap sheet taller than he is has taken an interest in the lie that Neil Josten and has made it his mission to uncover the bloodied truth that lies beneath.

By all accounts, Neil should just pick up his guitar and disappear like he’s done so many times before, but the chance to be real and seen is almost enough for him to plant his feet for the first time in 11 years he’s been running. Going into the spotlight means certain death, but Neil’s just not so sure that leaving it would mean anything different.

It’s finally here!!! My addition to the @aftgbigbang hosted by the wonderful @defractum  And let’s not forget some wonderful art by @uzea-ke which can be found on her blog.

Anonymous: "You were chased by the cops, got in my car and just yelled ‘Drive!“ for an au prompt

Sorry about the ending - this has been sitting in my drafts for two weeks and I was getting impatient… This is on my list to be finished I promise :) (also if you have any ideas on how to end this send me a message or like… write it in the tags???)

Neil was relaxing in a borrowed Ford Fiesta that smelled like fish cakes, chugging a lukewarm bottle of water he had just bought from the gas station, and contemplating how much money he could spare on ethanol, when the passenger door swung open and slammed shut in one swift, chaotic movement.

“Drive.”

He didn’t have time to register how panicked he should be, but the small blonde didn’t seem like someone his father would hire, and his stern command didn’t sound even remotely as threatening as Romero or Malcolm. Even so, Neil calmly set his water bottle in the sticky cup holder and gripped the steering wheel with both hands. “Who are you?”

The blonde suddenly rounded on him, his elbow coming up to Neil’s neck and applying pressure before he could even think about reacting. Neil faintly registered the familiar feeling of a knife pressed against his stomach, not quite puncturing the skin. “It doesn’t matter. You see those cops?”

Neil followed the blonde’s head tilt to the back window, where he noticed a few cop cars idling behind him in the gas station parking lot. Neil looked back at his captor and nodded as much as he was allowed, which wasn’t much.

“I don’t want to be caught by them, and judging by the state of your clothes and the fact that you aren’t even slightly tanned even though your license plate says Arizona, you don’t want to be caught either.”

It was a stretch, but Neil certainly didn’t want to spend the night in a police cell anytime soon. He could easily explain away the few accusations the blonde hit him with, but right now he just wanted to be far away from the cops now exiting their vehicles.

He tapped the blonde on the arm, “I can’t drive with a knife in my stomach.”

He was let go, but the knife remained poised between them. Neil admired the sleek design of it, definitely not something Lola would use, but the serrated edges were sharpened enough to filet a small pig. He shook his head to dismantle the direction of his thoughts and put the car in gear, tires squealing as he peeled out of the gas station parking lot. To his surprise, the policemen didn’t even glance at his vehicle as he pulled onto the nearest two-lane highway. He lowered his speed so he wasn’t breaking any laws, but kept his hand hovering over the gear shift.

“I locked the bathroom door and then snuck out the window. They’ll probably be occupied for at least another ten minutes.”

“That depends on how smart Columbia cops are,” Neil murmured, doing a few quick calculations in his head. There were three cop cars, two of which were just small city patrollers. The one he was most concerned with was the SUV with California printed on the license plate. Just what exactly did this kid do that warranted the arrival of an out of state cop?

“You’re right. 20 minutes.”

Neil shifted subtly in his seat to study his companion, who had slouched down and propped his legs on the passenger-side airbag. A study of nonchalance and apathy. “So what did you do?”

The kid didn’t answer him for awhile, keeping his eyes forward and expression blank. Neil had almost dropped the subject when the blonde suddenly spoke up, “Turns out cops don’t like it when you escape from their idea of rehabilitation.”

Neil considered this as he switched lanes, passing a semi truck who insisted on driving five miles under the speed limit. So the kid was either an escaped convict or an escaped mental patient. Great.

“Truth for a truth. What are you doing so far from home, Arizona?”

Neil wanted to laugh at the nickname, but he couldn’t find much humor in his current situation. “My mom was relocated for her job. I was on my way to school when you so eloquently barged in on my morning commute.”

“Hmmm you seem to think we’re playing truth for a lie.” The blonde didn’t show any hints of anger, but Neil eyed the knife he held over the center console all the same. “Distasteful game. Very one-sided.”

Neil rolled his eyes and gripped the steering wheel even harder. The kid was smarter than he originally thought. “I ran away from Arizona. Turns out fathers aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.” Maybe he could give away half-truths and hope for the best.

He watched as the blonde digested this information. He didn’t know how long their game would last, but he knew that this car ride wouldn’t end very well. He eyed his duffel bag, tucked away next to the gas pedal at his feet, his mother’s gun safely hidden underneath piles of carefully folded clothes. 

“Duly noted. Your turn.” The kid motioned with his knife for Neil to continue the game.

“Name?”

“Andrew. Yours?”

“Neil.”

“Either you’re used to switching names or you’re actually telling the truth.” Andrew mused while he adjusted the air conditioning.

“Glad that I can maintain your faith in humanity.” Neil quipped, swatting Andrew’s hand away from the dial and turning it back the way he had it. “Jail or mental hospital?”

“Neither. Juvie.”

Neil considered the blonde beside him. He really didn’t know what type of crimes warranted juvie over actual jail, but kidnapping an unsuspecting teenager at a gas station was probably up there on the list of federal offenses.

“Got any family left?”

Neil suddenly craved a cigarette. “Some. No siblings. You?”

“A twin. It was a recent development in my familial drama, so I wouldn’t delve too deep.”

Neil wasn’t planning on it.

They went on like that for about 30 miles, Neil giving Andrew half-truths about his past and his time in Millport, and Andrew hinting very sarcastically about a less than satisfactory time in juvie. Neil took every other exit on the highway, winding them through dilapidated towns with no real destination in mind. It was a learned behavior, but it came in handy in cases like these.

Narrator: it was at this point that @minyavd had @minyardfluff read the headcanon to decide how to end it.

But this was Andrew, and Aaron should have known better than to expect anything different. Should have remembered that Andrew's default setting was to shut down and shut out anything that came too close to matter. Aaron knew that. He’d always known that. And still, here he was, standing in front of the puzzle like an idiot, wondering why the pieces didn’t fit the way they had two days ago.