#teshteal

Lucille: That's him. That's the detective.

Settler: That's some freak sniffing the dirt! You call that a detective?

Dogmeat: *sniffing the ground for clues, too*

Nick: *on Teshteal being some weird guy sniffing the ground* Well that's a very rude thing to say about Dogmeat.

Dogmeat: Bork!

The Settler as they turn: Oh finally, an actual detec- oh. You're just a robot.

Nick: *feet propped up on his desk, reading the paper* A lovely morning to you, too, Myrna. Oh and case solved. It's my older cat, Teshteal.

Myrna: When did you get a cat?!

Nick: Technically Jas was the first. But now we have two.

Myrna: ???

Teshteal: *Scampers in so fast he pops up in her face out of nowhere* Hi racist shop lady! *Has the dopiest, yet maniacal, feline smile*

Myrna: *Screams* AAAH! NICK GET YOUR CAT!

Nick: *huffs, not even bothering to look up from the paper* He doesn't bite.

Teshteal: *grins, showing his sharp pointy teeth*

Myrna: YES HE DO! *scrambling to leave*

Nick after the fact: She didn't even pay me for solving the case... *cheeky smirk*

Teshteal: Who's going to penalize me? The AMERICAN JUSTICE SYSTEM?!

Nick: We have a lawyer right here. *gestures at Lucille* And two detectives. So, perhaps it could.

Teshteal: *turns around and skitters up to Nick on all fours like a monkey* Shut up! Your motha buys you Mega Blocks instead of LegOes!! *dying inside partly cause his mom also bought Mega Blocks instead. Also, Nick's right, sadly*

Nick: *darkly* You take that back right now.

Gardio: *Disappointed Dad Voice* You either buckle down and do your work or you’ll end up at McDonalds.

Teshteal: "Gets all sparkly eyed* We going to McDonalds if I don’t do my work?!?!

Hancock: *standing behind Teshteal, putting jet into the gremlin's back pocket* Yes, it is, if you try hard enough.

Teshteal: Wh- No it isn't!

Nick: *glances up at his superior and then at the man standing next to him* Have you tried looking up?

Widmark: *looks up and nearly jumps out of his skin* JESUS-!

Gardio: Oh- sorry. Didn't mean to scare ya. ^^;

Linus: *crawling on the floor literally like a gremlin... and he has a cheeseburger in his mouth*

Widmark: What in God's name- Officer Rammstein get off the floor! That's an order!

Gardio: I- that depends. Are we talking before the war? After? Before we even met?

Teshteal: Umm… before we met?

Gardio: Honestly, I'd either unknowingly use you as bait for fishing, scoop you up and put you back into the grass on the sidewalk and continue with my day, or completely go about my life, unaware of your existence.

Teshteal: *looks sadly up at him*

Gardio: Now if you were a talking worm that I could hear, I don't know if I would know what to do. Take you home? Listen to what you have to say? Turn myself into an asylum? Maybe all three? shrugs I might even like being a crazy weirdo with a worm for a best friend.