"The Bursar locked his study door behind him. You had to do that. The Archchancellor thought thy knocking on doors was something that happened to other people."

Some people think that "coven" is a word for a group of witches, and it's true that's what the dictionary says. But the real word for a group of witches is an "argument."

Granny's implicit belief that everything should get out of her way extended to other witches, very tall trees and, on occasion, mountains

A psychiatrist, dealing with a man who fears he is being followed by a large and terrible monster, will endeavor to convince him that monsters don't exist. Granny Weatherwax would simply give him a chair to stand on and a very heavy stick.

If only there had been mayonnaise, life might have turned out a whole lot different. More piquant, and perhaps with a little extra cream in it.

That's Third Thoughts for you. When a huge rock is going to land on your head, they're the ones that think: Is that an igneous rock, such as granite, or is it sandstone?

What was the good of being a wizard of the Seventh Level if you didn't have six other levels to look down on and the Eight Level to aspire to? You needed other wizards to hate and despise.