#tdiu things

“I’ll see you in a bit. I love you.”

Alex nods to Lucas, and then he’s gone, closing the door quietly behind him.

“I can’t do this,” he mutters, as soon as he sees Alex disappear around a corner. “Like, I’m not exaggerating. I’m gonna lose my fuckin’ mind.”

“Why?” Lucas asks.

“What do you mean, why?” He scoffs. “I hurt all over, and I’m so tired, and you made Alex leave, and I just- I can’t talk about this, okay? It’s not that I don’t want to. It’s that I fucking can’t.”

“Why can’t you?” Lucas probes. “What part of it feels hard?”

“Don’t do this,” he chokes out. “I know what you’re doing, and I can’t. Please.” His heart is starting to race.

“Hey.” A warm hand slips into his free one – he didn’t realize he had a death grip on one of the bedside railings until now – and squeezes, before pulling his hand toward them. He finally garners enough breath to properly lift his head.

Alex is smiling at him. He kisses their joined hands, and then leans in to press his lips against Jack’s cheek. “You’re okay.”

“You’re here,” Jack whispers. He starts to reach for Alex’s waist, but his ribs protest fiercely and the motion dies before it’s barely begun. He squeezes his eyes shut as the lump in his throat throbs. It all hurts. It hurts so much. He just wants to hold his fucking boyfriend, and he can’t even do that.