2022! (Jan. 1, 2022)
Jan. 1, 2022 | TDD Journal Entry #1
Happy new year to me! Celebrating new year's day again with my family and for the second time, during a pandemic . :/ I honestly can't describe this feeling I had since last night's celebration but what I know is that it's far different from what I felt last year. Last year's new year celebration to me was awful and kinda....depressing and anxious. All I remember is that I was afraid of facing another year in that kind of state where in i'm not living, i'm only surviving. Everyday waking up to the same routine I had since I graduated. Not feeling any motivation and felt so worthless while everyone else around me is moving forward chasing their goals and dreams.
This new year's day, I felt kinda motivated yet unsure of the things I'm about to face. And probably less afraid than last year. I think I became so tired of isolating myself and running away from the things I feared and even from the people around me. I felt like this year is the time I try to get out of my comfort zone so that I won't live in a life with regrets. I really hope I can bring these words and feeling of being motivated until the end of the year. I'm hoping I can get through this year again, but this time with God and the people who loves me. This year, I'll try to be less apologetic to the things not apologizing for and to be a bit more kinder to the people around me. I also hope I can finally face the things I feared (the things that crumple me down and cry just after hearing about it) with confidence and motivation, not only because of the pressure but also because of the eagerness to achieve my goals in life (slowly) and to learn how to grow and move forward from a phase in my life to another.
