#supernova chapter ten

As he crept quietly, not wanting to disturb any of the sleeping crewmates on his bathroom run, he noticed that Aelin’s door was open and popped his head in. He whispered, “Ace?” There was no one there.

Logically, she was going to the bathroom, not missing in space again, but his pulse still raced and he cursed quietly, closing the door so that if anyone else woke up, they wouldn’t notice anything was amiss. He wanted to find her, for his sake and hers, but he really had to take a leak so after he had dealt with that, Lorcan set off through the ship's zero-gravity corridor.

After blowing the vehicular airlock during Aelin’s rescue, the ship was much smaller and it didn’t take him long to poke through the remaining rooms.

It didn’t take a genius, which they all were, to see that Aelin wasn’t the same. Her oddities were something they all collectively ignored, knowing she was silently berating herself for not being as she once was. Honestly, it broke their hearts to see her panic at the amount of food on her plate and struggle to stop herself from checking their supplies. It broke their hearts to see her slip away when they were all together, unable to handle the attention.

They were trying, really, they were, to not overwhelm her and keep their distance, even Rowan at times.

No one thought it would be easy once they got her back, but… Gods, it was all a mess, one that no one knew how to muddle through. Certainly not Aelin. She was just trying to get through the days, one at a time.

Lorcan shook his head to rid it of his spiraling thoughts as he slid down the ladder to the rec room and turned, finding Aelin at the back of the ship, looking out the windows. “Ace?”

She whirled quickly at his voice, her hands shaking as she let out a breathless laugh, “You scared me. Hi.”

“Hey,” he said smoothly, walking slowly over to her. “Everything ok?” She’d probably say that it was and they would both ignore the blatant lie.

“No.”

Her answer shocked him, but he controlled himself, keeping his face neutral as he slipped his hands into the pockets of his sweats, nodding his head once, twice. What shocked him was not what she said, but that she’d said it at all. Finally, someone was getting the truth. “Want to talk?”

“Lorcan Salvaterre, are you going soft on us? Asking someone to talk about their feelings?” Aelin teased him.

Lorcan humoured her by huffing a dry laugh and tilting his head to the side as he reached the windows and leaned back against them. “So?”

Aelin breathed out shakily and wiped her eyes, “Yeah, um. I don’t… I don’t know anything anymore. It all feels so fake?”

After he’d come home from deployment, he’d felt the same thing. It was like there was a glass separating him and everyone else. “I remember that.”

“You do?”

His time spent serving wasn’t something he tended to discuss openly. Lorcan nodded again, “Yeah, I served for a couple tours. I was discharged after eight years due to ‘hardship’.” He let out a humourless laugh, “I guess being held as a prisoner of war three months is classified as a ‘hardship’.”

Aelin’s eyes were wide, “I didn’t know that. I’m sorry.”

“Please, don’t be. It’s not your problem, G,” he assured her. “I just want you to know that it’s ok to not be alright right now. No one is expecting you to be and don’t be hard on yourself because you’re not what you once were.”

She rolled her eyes and smiled ruefully, “Easier said than done, Commander.”

Lorcan smiled, “Yeah, it really is.” He tilted his head to the table and she nodded. They silently walked over to it and sat down on opposite sides.

“So,” she began, clasping her hands on the surface before her, “are you better now?”

“Depends on what you mean by ‘better’. Before… it was really bad. Couldn’t get out of bed, didn’t eat or drink. Could barely be around anyone else.” He stared at the table, “It’s not like that anymore, but… not every day is a good one.”

“What did you do? To make it go away?”

Lorcan looked at her for a few seconds, analyzing something. “Essar yelled at me one day. Near broke down my door and chewed me out for ignoring her and being a dick. Said just because I was going through a shit time didn’t mean I could be shitty to everyone who tried to help.” The corners of his mouth tugged up, “And then she roped in Elide. Your sister’s the scariest person I know.”

“You’re telling me that? You know how many times I had to physically restrain her from fighting anyone who dared insult me in her presence?”

They both laughed quietly. Elide was one of their safe subjects, one they literally never fought over, now. In the beginning, Aelin had been a bit… territorial and protective. After they calmed, Lorcan got serious again, “That’s not all it took. I had to work to improve and still do. You just gotta find something that makes you want to fight, Aelin. You need to fight every fucking day, every time that voice in your mind tells you you should give up now, or that no one cares. Because it’s wrong, ok? Do you think we would’ve come back for you if we didn’t care?”

Aelin ducked her head, hiding her tears. “I asked you a question, Aelin.”

She slowly rose her head, eyes of blue and gold meeting ones of pure obsidian, forged from the same raging monster that dwelled inside both of them. “No.” He nodded, that one small and satisfied grin on his lips. Despite herself, it filled her with a warming sense of pride.

“Are you gonna tell me why you’re still up?”

“I had a dream. And all of this,” she waved her hand around, indicating the past year and a half, “hadn’t happened and we were on our way to Farnor. I just- I needed to see that we were leaving it all behind.” She dropped her hands in her lap and looked down at her fingernails, all bitten down to the quick. “I’m just so tired all the time.”

“Probably cause you’re not sleeping and it’s, like, three am.”

Aelin laughed, “Gods, you’re an asshole.”

He smiled and drawled, his tone dry, “So I’ve been told. Alright,” he clapped his hands, “if you’re not going to sleep, might as well watch a movie. Where’s my laptop?” Lorcan stood and walked over to the wall of compartments, reaching up high to his personal drawer. He pulled down his personal computer and moved to the couch area, putting it down on the table.

She still hadn’t moved and Lorcan looked over his shoulder, “Well, come on. Your choice between Ant-Man or Guardians of the Galaxy.”

“Wow, so many options,” Aelin commented as she made her way over to the couch and sat down, curling her legs under her.

Lorcan glanced at her before turning back to the screen, “Elide sits just like that.”

“You really love her,” said Aelin. Lorcan froze and slowly looked at her, his brows furrowing. “It’s good. She deserves someone like you. And Guardians of the Galaxy.”

He smiled, “You got it.” Soon, the movie was playing and they sat in a comfortable silence, understanding that what they had been talking about was done for now and they would continue on later. “Rowan really loves you too, Ace.”

She slowly turned to look at him but didn’t say anything until Lorcan elaborated. “I know you two had your moment or whatever, but he’s completely gone for you.”

A smitten smile pulled at her lips and Lorcan just had to pop her bubble, “Plus, he has a thing for know-it-all blondes.” Aelin choked and shoved his shoulder, to which Lorcan said, “Veteran abuse.”

“You’re such a dick,” she grumbled, frowning as she snuggled into his side. Lorcan just laughed and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. After a few minutes where they watched the movie in silence, she whispered, “I don’t want to mess it up.”

“I know you don’t. I don’t think you will.”

“Why?”

“I’m not sure Rowan’s ever wanted anything more than this,” Lorcan told her, resting his chin on the top of her head. “He’s waited all this time for you, he doesn’t mind waiting a little longer.”

And neither did Aelin.

 +*+*+*+*+*+*

“Lani, this is Flight, waiting for confirmation.”

“Copy Flight, Lani actual is ready for re-entry and landing.”

“Roger that Lani. Beginning re-entry countdown,” Manon said, her voice staticky through the headset.

Everyone was strapped into their seats, ready for landing. The timer controller turned on and the robotic tone began counting down from ten. Wordlessly, Aelin held her hand, palm up, to Rowan. He stared at her hand for a moment before gently taking it and squeezing once.

The ship shook as it was remotely piloted back into Earth’s gravity. Aelin closed her eyes and breathed out slowly, repeating soothing inhales and exhales as she felt the re-entry.

“Lani, Flight – the Thresher has confirmed it is ready for pick-up.”

“Copy, Flight.”

The metal beast rattled as the boosters detached and hurtled to the ocean, far far below them still. Aelin knew that the craft would be burning right now, but with the heat shield and their temperature-controlled suits, no one could feel a thing.

As the free-fall continued for a few minutes or so, Aelin gripped Rowan’s hand harder, tensing as the craft jerked back – the parachutes. Their descent slowed and an indeterminate amount of time later, they crashed into the ocean. The pontoons that were set off kept them afloat as they all checked in with each other, assuring that everyone was ok.

The mood was vivid and excited as a hissing sound filled the craft and the door popped open, the sun blinding. “You guys lost or something?”

Lorcan and Fenrys let out shocked cries, “Corsario?”

“The one and only,” the man replied, a smug grin splitting his face in two. His sea green eyes sparkled as he and his crew helped them out of the ship and onto the motored boat that would take them to the Thresher, Terrasen’s Navy’s amphibious transport docking ship.

“Guys, this is Rolfe Corsario, we were all in boot camp together,” Lorcan explained, gesturing between him, Fenrys, and Rolfe. The sailor held out his hand to help Aelin into the boat and she noticed that his brown skin was covered in tattoos that resembled maps. Aelin held onto his hand even after she sat down, trying to get a better look.

“Ah, can’t let you do that,” he said, pulling his hand from her grasp before hopping neatly down and sitting by the motor.

“Why not?” The whole crew, save for Lorcan and Fenrys who just rolled their eyes, leaned in to listen.

Fenrys cut in before Rolfe could answer her, “They’re not for mortal eyes.” He received a quick swat to the back of his head before Rolfe turned to her.

“They’re Mycenian markings. Can’t let outsiders see them,” he said with a wink and lazy grin as he steered the boat to the Thresher.

“They’re on your hands, dipshit,” Lorcan said, twisting his helmet off and tossing it by his feet. “Anyone can see them.”

“I’m going to ignore that and still let you onto my ship.”

One by one, the astronauts popped their helmets off and sighed at the cool ocean breeze. Aelin closed her eyes, tilting her head back up to the sun just as a shadow passed over her and she frowned, opening her eyes to find that they had arrived at the ship.

Elide offered to let Aelin go up the ladder first but the blonde shook her head, waiting until she was the last one on the boat. Taking a deep breath, Aelin stepped up to the ladder and nodded to herself, stepping on the first rung.

She froze and looked to the side, seeing Rolfe waiting patiently. He dipped his chin once, “Welcome back.”

 +*+*+*+*+*

Aelin had requested that no media be there when the plane touched down in Orynth. The thought of being the centre of attention, in a media hailstorm, had her feeling queasy.

TNSB had complied and when she stepped off the plane, the only people she saw were a handful of TNSB employees, the scientists who had brought her home.

The second she saw a flash of moon-white hair and another of yellow-gold, she let out an undignified squeal and ran, blatantly ignoring Weylan and Gavriel to launch herself at Manon and Asterin. They laughed and hugged her tight.

“So, what does it take for you to get Darrow’s job,” Aelin muttered, the question directed at Manon.

The white-haired woman shrugged as Asterin cackled, “He wants to fire her.”

Aelin pulled back, “What! Why, what’d you do?”

Manon just shrugged again and flipped her hair over her shoulder, “I might’ve leaked some confidential flight plans to Elide. He didn’t appreciate that.”

“Gods, I missed you two,” Aelin breathed, hugging them close again. “Thanks for getting me home.” The back of her throat ached with tears and she wiped her eyes.

Eventually, the rest of her crew caught up with her and they exchanged professional greetings with both Weylan and Gavriel. The cold disdain for the director of TNSB was palpable and Elide gently patted Lorcan’s arm, speaking in Blackbeak as she told him, “Stop frowning at him. Weylan’s about to shit himself.”

He chuckled darkly as Manon and Asterin cackled once more. Asterin surveyed her boss, who was talking with Nesryn a few metres away, “I bet he will.”

“Ten bucks?”

“Are we children,” Aelin asked, an unimpressed arch to her brows, “Ten’s too low, I say we go for the big bucks.” They continued with their childish banter as some frazzled-looking woman herded them off the tarmac and into headquarters.

Aelin lingered outside, eyes on the sky. The woman tried to get her attention, but Rowan said he’d wait for her and catch up later.

The sun’s glare became too bright for her eyes and she blinked hard, pivoting neatly to the door, where she found Rowan. A smile grew on her face and she walked quickly to his side, tucking herself under his arm and into his side. “Waiting for me again, are we?”

She grabbed his hand and tugged him behind her, only to be sent backwards when he didn’t move. “Ro, what are you- oh!” He settled his hand on her waist and tipped her chin back, green eyes swimming with too much and not enough all at once.

“For you, Fireheart,” he murmured, tracing his thumb over the apple of her cheek, “for you I’d wait forever.”

+*+*+*+*+*+*

an: annnnd that’s a wrap! thank you all for reading and sticking with me through this whole lil thang - this was super fun to write