#superfriendstitlechallenge

It was frustrating, to say the least when you didn’t even remember the guy’s appearance. You could only hope a glimpse of his face would come back to you. You took one last glance at him before getting up. You nearly choked when your eyes landed on the small scar on the side of his hip. There was no way in hell you wouldn’t recognize that scar. You were the one who stitched him up back then. Clothes formed a trail on the floor, you scooped them up and dressed as fast and as quiet as you could. Your heart was almost leaping out of your chest by the time you walked out of the room.

Outside of the motel, you allowed your breath to even and your heart to calm down in your chest. His car was parked only a few feet away. You ignored the shining impala and made your way back to the bunker. It wasn’t the first time you came to this particular motel so you knew the way.

It was early. Dean never wakes up before noon after a night at a bar. You had enough time to get home, shower, and take a nap before he came back. You could only hope he’d remember as much as you did. Nothing. The thought of ruining your friendship with Dean had your palms sweating. It was undeniable that you felt something for him. Those feelings were buried way too deep and throughout the years you learned how to live with them. He didn’t make it any easier on you though. Dean was constantly flirting with you. In the beginning, it was tough to be around him. Dean’s a flirt. Every now and then he’d give you his signature smirk and wink followed by a flirty comment. Although it caused a weak in your knees, you figured it was best to keep your feelings to yourself rather than risk losing him.

Arriving at the bunker, you made your way to the war room, hoping to find one of your best friends. There was no sign of Sam. You figured he’d either be on his morning run or making breakfast. It wasn’t even eight yet, so he must be home.

“Hey you,” you smiled, leaning on the fridge.

“Hey,” he greeted as he finished making his sandwich. “I didn’t expect you to be back already.”

“Yeah, I know. Just missed my bed I guess.”

“Dean’s not home yet. Did you hear from him?”

“Nope,” you were grateful he had his back to you and wouldn’t catch you lying.

“Do you want me to make you something?” He turned to you, hazel eyes widening as they roamed over your entire body. “You okay? You've been crying?”

“What? No, of course not. Why?”

“Your mascara or eyeliner, I don’t know, is a little smudged.”

“Oh,” your fingertips touched the skin under your eyes softly. You left in such a hurry that you didn’t even look in the mirror. “Guess that’s what happens when you sleep with makeup on,” you shrugged. “Alright, I’m gonna take a shower then take a nap. Trust me, I need it.”

“Okay, you do you.”

You headed straight to the shower. The need to wash off the guilt and fear of ruining your thirteen-year friendship grew stronger by the second. You could only hope those feelings would be dispelled down the drain along with the stink of alcohol and sex. The water felt good on your tired body. You didn’t take long in there though. Every cell in your body claimed to be in bed again. You needed at least two more hours of sleep to survive the rest of the day. That and being away from Dean for twenty-four hours both physically and psychologically. Mission impossible.

Your eyes fell closed the second your body hit the soft mattress. Memory foam hugged your limbs, lulling you to sleep.

The headboard banged against the wall. Your mind was in a haze of alcohol and pleasure. Dean’s groans sounded distant. His hands were all over your body. His thrusts were erratic as he searched for the final push. You arched against him, breasts pressed to his firm chest. He whispered soft praises against your skin as a wave of pleasure consumed you.

Your eyes shot open as you sat in bed abruptly. Beads of sweat covered your forehead. Pulling the covers off, you got up, making a beeline to the bathroom. You washed your face in an attempt to get rid of the images of last night. It was in vain. The mirror only reflected how screwed you were. As if the images and the sounds running wild in your mind weren’t enough, your cleavage was covered in hickeys. You closed your eyes and suddenly you were back in that cheap motel room.

Dean’s lips kissed and sucked every patch of skin they could. Your hand shot to his head, fingers tugging at his hair. He groaned against the curve of your neck. His lips descended to your collarbone. Dean marked your skin as his hand squeezed your breast softly. He drunkenly mumbled “mine” against you.

Shaking the memory away, you turned off the tap and headed to your room. It was early which meant you had high chances of not seeing Dean. You just needed to eat and take a pill for the pounding headache. Then you could come back and hide in your room for the rest of the day. Pulling on a hoodie, you made your way to the kitchen.

“You’re awake,” Sam greeted. “Thought you were gonna sleep for the rest of the morning.”

“Yeah, me too,” you sighed, turning on the coffee maker before grabbing some bacon in the fridge for you to cook. “I wanted to, but I had a bad dream.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” you shrugged.

“I found us a case,” he announced as you sat in front of him with a plate and a mug in your hands. “Omaha, Nebraska. I think it’s a spirit. A quick salt and burn will do it.”

“Good. When do we leave?” you asked, munching the crispy bacon.

“Tomorrow?”

“Okay.”

“And, uh, do you mind if it’s just you and Dean on this one? Eileen and I have a date tomorrow and uh-“

“Yeah, s-sure. I don’t mind going alone with Dean. I mean… Why would I mind? It’s not like we haven’t been on hunts just the two of us.”

“Y/N? Is everything okay?”

“Sure,” you tried to keep your voice as normal as you could, but failed miserably. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “You’re the one acting weird.”

“Okay,” you sighed. “I need to tell you something, but you can’t tell anyone. Last night I didn’t come home because I was with Dean. After you left the bar, we had a few more drinks. A lot more. And we slept together.”

“Finally,” he breathed out and you gasped at his reaction. “I just don’t understand why you guys went to a motel instead of coming home.”

“The motel was closer and we were kinda in a hurry.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” you said as you finished your breakfast.

“Why didn’t he come home with you?”

“I panicked when I saw him sleeping next to me. I practically ran out of the room. I think he won’t remember a thing. At least I hope he doesn’t.”

“Why? You’ve known each other for thirteen years. You have feelings for each other for at least ten. I’m surprised it took this long for something to happen.”

“You don’t understand, Sam,” you shook your head. “I can’t ruin my friendship with him. I can’t risk that.”

“Of course you can. You’re just afraid.”

“Afraid of what?” Dean asked as he walked into the room. You nearly gasped. He shouldn’t be back already.

Dean was sporting a hickey on the right side of his neck. You felt your cheeks heat up at the sight of it.

“I’m afraid of spiders and I can’t kill them,” you said fast before Sam could say anything.

Dean only hummed, opening the fridge and grabbing a pot with overdue food. He put some in his mouth but spat most of it, grimacing. A chuckle left your lips at the scene.

“What you got?” he mumbled, turning on the coffee machine.

“Salt and burn. Omaha, Nebraska. Should be easy for you and Y/N.”

“You not tagging along?”

“Nah, got a date with Eileen,” Sam smiled.

“You’re finally getting some,” the older Winchester teased. “Y/N and I can cover it. We are a great team, right sweetheart?”

He gave you a wink. You wondered if he remembered anything of your activities the previous night.

“Right,” you clicked your tongue.

Dean grabbed his coffee and sat beside you. He stank of alcohol and sex. He should’ve gone straight to the shower but he didn’t. He was still in the same clothes as last night for crying out loud.

“Dude, you smell terrible,” Sam grimaced.

“That, Sammy, is the smell of a man who had a crazy night of hot sex. You should try it sometime.”

Fuck, he remembers, you cursed.

“You’re disgusting.”

“No, I’m not. It’s a shame I had what was probably the best night of my life and I don’t remember shit. Not even her face. She left without a note. She could at least have left her phone number somewhere. But she did leave this bad boy here,” he pointed to the purple mark in his neck.

You could only hope neither of them would notice your flaming cheeks. He was so close. You were afraid he’d take one look at your face and all the memories would come back to him. You were afraid he’d still be able to smell his scent ingrained in your skin.

“I do remember some things though. Hmmm, some really good things,” Dean nearly moaned as he closed his eyes and bit his lower lip. Sam quickly glanced at you, hazel eyes wide before staring back at his brother. “Whoever she was she surely knew what she was doing to me. Her body was trapped under mine as if she belonged there. Her hands all over my body, exploring it. Oh, and her skin felt so good under my touch. That I remember damn well.”

You fought hard to repress a moan. The words rolled out his tongue in a sensual song. Your thighs clenched unwittingly. Though you were as much aroused as you were embarrassed. He was saying all that in front of his brother after all. Sam didn’t want to know anything about Dean’s activities, but the look in his eyes told you he was having fun seeing you suffer.

“And she smelled good too. So fucking good. I swear that if I close my eyes, I can feel her touch. I can even hear her soft moans. What wouldn’t I give just to know her name.”

“Maybe you should try asking the bartender if he remembers her face or even her name,” Sam suggested and you kicked his foot under the table. “I’m sure he might remember something.”

“She felt absolutely perfect,” Dean completely ignored his brother. “The way her fingers tugged at my hair, making it hurt just a little. Then her legs wrapped around me and… fuck,” he growled. “That was mind-blowing. She clenched around me so tight-”

“Dude, too much information. You should keep that to yourself,” Sam interrupted his brother while you prayed neither of them had listened to the small groan that left your lips.

“All I’m saying is she was too fucking hot. I wished she could’ve had the decency of leaving me her number,” he sighed. “If you guys think this hickey is the only thing she left for me, you’re wrong. She might not have left a note, but she did leave some real sexy marks all over me. Hmm, I love it when they mark me up. So damn hot.”

“Dude-“

“And if I concentrate hard enough I can still taste her in my tongue,” Dean smirked.

“That’s enough, man. I’m gonna have nightmares for the rest of my life.”

Dean chuckled at his brother’s reaction and took one last gulp of his now lukewarm coffee.

“Excuse me, but I, uh, I’m gonna take a nap. I’m tired,” you hurriedly stood from your seat. “I’ll catch with you guys later.”

As you disappeared in the hall, Dean’s grin got even wider as he shook his head. Sam scoffed, realization dawned on him.

“You remember, don’t you?” Sam asked his brother, a smile on his lips.

“Every single detail,” Dean nodded with a smirk.

“Dude, you aren’t worth a penny.”

“What can I say? I love seeing her squirm.”

“You should go after her.”

“I am,” Dean said. “I’m just gonna give her some time to pull herself together.”

Sam nodded. Silence fell between the brothers. Each of them lost in their own world. Dean tried to come up with a way to approach you without making it weird. Sam tried to erase the images his brother put in his mind. The younger Winchester was sure he threw up in his mouth a little. Dean had given him a share of traumas concerning sex when they were teenagers and now this?

Dean got up from his seat and before he headed to your bedroom, he placed his mug on the dishwasher. He was about to leave the kitchen but stopped and glanced at his brother.

“You were the only one who didn’t score last night, Samuel,” he teased and Sam rolled his eyes.

Three soft knocks on the door startled you, dragging you out of your trance. Mumbling a “c’mon in”, you straightened yourself at the edge of the bed.

“Hey,” Dean smiled, peeking his head through the door.

“Hi,” you smiled, a thumping beat of your heart in your chest.

Dean made his way to your bed and sat just a few inches from you. His thigh brushing against yours.

“How’re you feeling?” He glanced at you but your eyes were fixated on the closed door.

“Really tired. You?”

“Exhausted. Don’t know if I should take a shower or a nap.”

“I think you need both,” you smiled as a chuckle reverberated in his throat.

“Yeah, you’re right,” he clicked his tongue, green eyes falling in his hands as he rubbed them together. “You know, I must confess that you did rock my world last night.”

“You remember?” You stared at him wide eyed only to meet a crooked grin on his lips. “Of course you do,” groaning, you buried your face in your hands.

“How could I ever forget?”

“We had a lot of drinks. A whole lot.”

“Yeah, guess I just needed to get my ass drunk to finally go after something I wanted.”

“Don’t do this, Dean,” you pleaded, staring into his forest green eyes.

“I thought last night meant something, you know? I thought it would change things between us for the best. I couldn’t believe I was the only one feeling something. Not with the way we look at each other and the constant flirting and the way we hold each other. Now imagine my disappointment when I woke up and you weren’t there.”

“Dean, I-“

“I thought you were gonna be there. I thought we were gonna talk and figure things out between us, but you didn’t even give me a chance. It felt as if you regretted it, as if what happened between us was a mistake,” his voice was low, barely upon a whisper.

“No, Dean, I don’t regret it,” you shook your head. “It wasn’t a mistake but we shouldn’t have done it.”

“Why? Why shouldn't we have done it? Give me one good reason why.”

“Because we are friends and I don’t want to ruin that.”

“We were never friends, Y/N. I feel something for you from day one. And I know you feel something for me too. Now you either-“

You captured his plump lips in yours. His eyes widened and it took him a second before kissing you back. His hand cupped your face, thumb caressing your cheek. The gentle press of his lips almost made your heart leap out of your chest. He pulled away a little too soon for your liking. Dean placed a small peck to your lips before resting his forehead against yours.

“Now I either what?” You giggled, opening your eyes and finding his still closed.

“I don’t know,” Dean chuckled. “Guess this changes things, right?”

“Mmhmm,” your hands were on each side of his neck as you pecked his lips.

“Good.”

“I hate to tell you but you need a shower.”

“Yeah, I do,” he said sheepishly, his hands were on your waist as he moved you to straddle his lips. “But I think you should come with me. You know, that whole save water, shower together thing.”

“Hmmm, I’ve kinda already showered.”

“Do it again. I promise you won’t regret it,” he smirked.

“I thought you said you hated shower sex. You said it was too complicated.”

“I don’t hate it. It is complicated though, but I’m sure we can work things out,” he grinned, standing up with you in his arms as you wrapped your legs around his waist. “‘Sides, you ought to see all the damage you caused last night.”

“You’re gonna be the death of me, Winchester.”

I’d love to know what you think of this one!! Consider sharing your thoughts with me via reply, reblog or ask!

Note that if your name is crossed, tumblr wouldn’t let me tag you :(

Forevers: @hobby27​ @thewinchesterandreidwhore

“Are you serious right now?”

Your voice carried from the patio into the kitchen, where Jo and Charlie worked on chopping vegetables and making a salad. Jo hastily swallowed her beer before looking over at Charlie, who shook her head and continued chopping bell peppers for the veggie kabobs.

Jo bit her lip, keeping her comments to herself as the sliding door pulled open and you squeezed through into the kitchen. Dean followed, hot on your heels. Digging into the fridge, you loaded your arms with cans of lime beer. Meanwhile, Dean pressed against the island beside Jo, looping her and Charlie into the conversation.

“Come on! Why not? Is there something about me that screams not-boyfriend-material?”

Charlie’s eyes widened, the knife in her hand stilling. Jo, unable to hold it in, flipped her hair over her shoulder and stared up at Dean with a wicked grin to ask: “You mean other than the emotionally-stunted, dumbass energy you project to potential girlfriends?”

You and Charlie snickered. Dean made a face back at Jo.

“Anyways, shouldn’t you be watching the meat?” She turned back to tossing cherry tomatoes into the salad bowl and sent you a wink to let you know she had your back.

He waved his hand out to the patio in dismissal.

“It’s grilling.”

Arm loaded, you moved to head back out to the patio where Castiel was waiting, but Dean stepped in your path and took some cans from you.

“I can be nice,” he said with a sweet smile, leaning into your space so that he was all you could see.

You took a breath to respond but found all coherent thought had left your head at the beauty of his face. Thankfully, Charlie piping in saved you from any embarrassment.

“What is this about?”

Dean released you from his stare and straightened to address Charlie. You used the opportunity to steal a can back and slide past him to the door.

“I offered to be her boyfriend for the holidays, and she laughed me off!” He whirled around to call after you. “I’m just trying to do you a favor!”

“Thanks, really, I appreciate it!” And, you were back outside, sliding the door between you with a distinct click.

Dean stared through the glass at you, his shoulders falling in resignation. Charlie raised her eyebrows to Jo, who shook her head against the idea. But, Charlie had a knack for toeing the line between defiance and play. 

“You want to be her boyfriend for the holidays?”

At her question, Dean blinked, and his entire demeanor changed.

“No! But, she was saying how this time of year made her lonely, missing her family and stuff. I offered to go with her to her office party and when she asked how she would explain having me on her arm, I said to tell them I was her boyfriend. And, then she laughed.” His eyes widened, his eyebrows lifting high on his forehead to convey the severity. “Really hard.”

When Charlie’s smile grew to reveal teeth, Jo rolled her eyes and rounded the island to take over the job of slicing the bell peppers. It was her way of telling her girlfriend to go do her thing, matchmake.

You were sprawled across the sun chairs by the pool, soaking in the warm vitamin D with Castiel, and listening to his messy love life.

“I don’t understand it and I probably never will,” Castiel said, his eyes squinting through the sunlight as he watched his son, Jack, wrestle with Sam in the pool. “She tells me repeatedly that what we had is through. But, she finds a way to sabotage even the slightest possibility of a romantic attachment for me.”

You shook your head, gulping down your beer to loosen your lips.

“Cas, she’s jealous! She won’t let you move on until she does. And, even if she were to find a man, I bet money she will try to turn it into a competition with you.” You reached over to place your sunglasses over Castiel’s eyes so he could stop squinting.

His face immediately relaxed and, when he turned to you with his mouth slightly ajar, you couldn’t blame Anna for trying to keep Castiel on a tether. He was a hot single father. The salty air had swept his dark hair free of its usual rigid hold, and the blue shirt had been unbuttoned down the middle to reveal his nicely tanned chest.

You dropped your head back against the chair, staring at his face and wishing for a moment that it was him you were even a little bit attracted to. He was kind and gentle but…

“You are saying that I have to quit then to avoid further entanglement.”

…but maybe just a tad too dramatic.

“Hopefully not. You’re just going to have to be patient for a while. Get that promotion and get as far away from her as you can.”

“Avoid her,” he trailed off, letting the idea sink in as you lifted your drink back to your lips. “Like you just tried to do with Dean.”

You spat up your beer.

The sunglasses shielded Castiel’s eyes perfectly so that you could only stare back at the firm lines of his mouth and eyebrows. Boy, had that backfired.

Jack called out to you both to play a game of volleyball with him and Sam in the pool. You didn’t wait to be asked twice, vaulting out of your chair before Castiel could decline.

A moment later, Jo followed Dean back out onto the patio. His eyes found you immediately as you splashed water at Jack to keep him from accurately hitting the ball back over the net. Sam shouted cheating, but you laughed back claiming it as an opportunity.

When Dean didn’t say anything and turned to lift the hood of the grill, Jo asked if he wanted to talk. He wiped at the sweat over his lip and shook his head. If what Charlie said was true, he had handled this all wrong. He just needed a minute to wrap his mind around it.

Jo was the one to call everyone back inside to fill their plates with kabobs and fajitas. Charlie pushed the veggies and salad, which Sam happily obliged in scooping onto his plate. You loaded down your plate and made yourself another drink before sitting around the table with everyone.

“Have you all been to the beach yet?” Charlie kicked you under the table to get your attention, but you already had a mouthful of food.

“Not yet,” Jack said around a strip of fajita. Castiel signaled his son not to talk with his mouth full, so Jack was quick to swallow. “I want to go tomorrow though and dig a hole.”

Jo looked around the table, but when no one responded, she caved and asked.

“A hole for what?”

“Just a hole.”

“He likes to dig holes at the beach,” Castiel paused in his eating to explain. “The last beach trip we were on, he dug a hole four feet deep and five feet wide.”

“Only took about two hours,” Jack beamed.

Sam wordlessly offered you the tomatoes from his plate. You accepted with an eager grin. Seeing the exchange, Dean cleared his throat and reached across the table for the salt.

“If you want, I can take you out there tomorrow,” he offered to Jack. “I could go for a day laying on the beach.”

“It does sound nice,” Charlie said, her shoulders slumping. She shot Jo puppy-dog eyes. “We promised Ellen we would stop by while in the area. We’re going to need the whole day to walk there, visit and walk back.”

“Oh,” Sam piped up. “There’s a bike rental just down the street. I could go with you, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen Bobby.”

“And, who would you be to pass up a bike ride,” Jo teased.

You caught Charlie’s eye and something made you slow in your chewing. Your eyes flashed around the table, and you realized too late what was about to happen.

Charlie turned to loop Castiel back into the conversation.

“Would you like to join us tomorrow? I happen to know for a fact that Ellen’s cute neighbor is single and looking to mingle.”

Jo’s face scrunched. “Only you could make that sound even remotely tempting.”

The others were laughing as you silently panicked. There was no way you could jump across the table to tell Castiel not to go. There was nothing you could do. This was going to happen.

You wondered if everyone was working together to plot against you when –

“Wait, so it’s just me watching the kid at the beach?” Dean’s indignation cut through your panic. Only for a moment, because soon everyone was looking down the table at you. Dean followed their gazes and did a double take before rolling his eyes and sighing. “Let me guess…”

“Yeah,” you finally piped up, hating how high your voice went. “I was planning on going before everyone decided to bail, for some reason.”

“We’re not bailing,” Jo defended. “The whole reason we’re here is so I can go see my mom.”

“It does appear a little suspicious,” Castiel murmured. He smiled across the table at you. “I can go to the beach with you.”

“And pass up flirting with the neighbor?” Dean grunted. He looked apologetic as soon as the words left his mouth. “Whatever, go or stay. It’ll be fine. I’m here to relax, not make things complicated.”

“Right yeah,” you joined. “Cas, if you want to go, go. Dean and I can look after Jack tomorrow, it’s fine.”

Dean hesitated before catching your eye. You timidly met his gaze and nodded in assurance. If he was okay, you were okay.

“Why does everyone think I need someone to watch me? I am seventeen you know,” Jack spoke to the table.

“Mark the time, babe,” Charlie said, lifting her glass of white wine in the air. “We’ve become our parents.”

 Everyone around the table lifted their glasses to toast with self-deprecating cheers, except for Dean.

“I’m not toasting to that,” he said.

You stayed inside to clean the kitchen, letting Jo and Charlie go out and enjoy the firepit in the yard that Sam had started. Setting a playlist on your phone, you passed the plates and utensils through the sink before fitting them into the dishwasher, saving the larger dishes for last. Humming and doing a light twist, you did not hear Dean step in through the sliding door behind you.

As the rock beats faded, you turned to grab the bowls, jumping a little at finding Dean standing behind the island. He held a beer to his chest, his other hand slipped into the pocket of his jeans. His smile was slow but radiant the longer he stared.

You bit back the questions of how long he had been standing there and if he saw you dance, because of course he had. So, you skipped all of that and pointed at the bowls you had turned for.

“Hand me those, will you?”

“Sure,” he said and placed his beer on the table. Instead of handing them to you, he picked them up and walked around the island to stand next to you. “How can I help?”

Trying to figure out his angle, you stepped aside to grant him access to the cupboard under the sink.

“You can wipe down the countertops. Supplies are under the sink.”

For a while, you worked in silence, the playlist continuing to play.

“Maybe I was wrong,” Dean spoke up as you rinsed the last bowl. Carefully placing it in a rack to dry, you slowly turned to face him.

“Wrong about what?”

“Maybe I’m not the problem.”

“Problem – what – you,” you stuttered through the firing thoughts in your head. “I never said you were a problem! Can I just remind you that my big crime here was laughing at a joke that you made?”

“It wasn’t a joke! I was offering to help you out, to be your boyfriend on standby or whatever. But, you didn’t take me seriously. Because you don’t think you can be my girlfriend.”

You wished that hadn’t struck you right through the chest, but it did, knocking the breath right from your lungs. Your fingers anxiously tapped the counter behind you. It was most unfortunate you had finished your task, because you had nothing to distract you from this moment. Nothing to distract you from him and the truth of his words.

He raised his eyebrows at your continued silence. When you couldn’t look him in the face anymore, he sighed and leaned over the island to rest his forearms on it.

“Can we talk about that?”

“You aren’t going to turn this around and laugh in my face, are you?” It was sixty percent an attempt at humor and forty percent insecurity.

His fingers tapped the counter to get your attention, then curled upwards to get you to look him in the face. He smiled when you did, which made you immediately scoff and roll your eyes away.

“It’s not that I don’t think I can be your girlfriend,” you explained with a bit of an edge. “You’ve seen my exes, I know what I’m doing.”

“They were all losers except for Richard,” he countered slowly. “And, I know for a fact you one hundred percent did not know what you were doing.”

“Yes, because this is how you get me to agree to fake date, you question my ability to make decisions.” As his hands raised in surrender, you stepped forward to collapse against the island across from him. “I don’t want to fake date you, Dean. Because, I know that it would only make me want to date you down the line and that’s…”

At the sight of panic on his face, you laughed and tried to brush it off.

“That would be bad for our friendship. I love how things are now, I don’t want to mess it up or make things complicated. So can we please just drop this?”

You shared a shy smile and he reached for your clasped hands. His hand ran over the top of yours before squeezing gently.

“That’s fair. Consider the idea dropped.”

“Great, thanks.”

You both pulled away from each other. You made an excuse to go up to your room for a shower to wash the chlorine from your skin.

“We’re still on for tomorrow,” he called out to you before you could disappear up the stairs.

You gave him a thumbs up.

“Still on.”

He returned the thumbs up then exited through the sliding door to join the others.

You made it all the way to your room without a second thought, but the moment you shut the door, doubt began to creep in.

Had you shared too much? Should you have told him more? It was how you truly felt, but you deliberately said it in a way that wouldn’t have him thinking you wanted him right now in this moment. It was all preventative. This protected your friendship and your heart.

You rummaged through your suitcase for clothes to wear after the shower, but you were so distracted with your thoughts, you forgot you had already set aside an outfit on the dresser by the adjoining bathroom.

A knock at your door had you dropping everything anyway. You crossed the room, your heartbeat pounding in your ears, and opened the door to reveal Dean standing on the other side. He braced himself in the door frame, staring at you with a thinly veiled hunger.

“I don’t want to drop it.”

Before you could ask the inane ‘drop what’, he stepped into your space, cradled your face in his hands and pulled you into a kiss. Your legs went weak, you fell against him, gripping his forearms for dear life as your head spun and fire ignited your entire body. It felt like you should have been kissing Dean Winchester your entire life.

You shivered against each other and slowly parted. Through hazy vision, you looked at each other.

“Real dating. You and me. What do you say?”

Your hands traveled up and down his arms. Breathing in his exhales, you were intoxicated.

“Get in here before I change my mind.”

His lips pressed against yours and the intensity made you dizzy. His hands splayed across your back holding you to him as he stepped further into your room and shut the door behind him.

And that was how Dean became your real boyfriend.

A/N: Thanks for reading!

“Morning Dean. Heading out?”

“Yup, got some errands to run. You?”

“Work.”

“Hey what are you doing this weekend?” he asked as you stepped onto the elevator.

“Uh not much. Grading, catching up on some laundry.”

“Sam’s having a get together at his house Saturday. It’s been a while since we’ve done that with the other guys and we were wondering if you would be able to join us.”

“Uh yeah of course. It’s been a while since everyone’s been together,” you smiled up at him and when it felt too long you looked away. Dammit. You hadn’t been too obvious, had you?

You had had a crush on Dean Winchester since you first moved in. At first, you tried to ignore those feelings. Telling yourself he was just a handsome guy. A very handsome guy. However, as you got to know him and you started to become friends those feelings became stronger. A simple crush had developed into something more complicated but there was nothing you could do. Dean had never shown any indication he felt something more for you than a simple friendship. Despite your simple flirting at times you didn’t want things to get awkward between you two.

“Alright well, I’ll let Sam know you’re coming over,” he said as you stepped out of the elevator. “Oh, and it’s at two. Later Y/L/N.”

“Later Winchester.”

The weekend couldn’t come fast enough. The school days seemed slower, but teaching managed to distract you for a while. Saturday morning you managed to finish some very needed chores. When one rolled around you started to overthink things. What were you going to wear? This was a simple get-together with the guys so some jeans and a simple t-shirt right?

But you also couldn’t stop thinking that Dean would be there. Your feelings didn’t seem to be going anywhere and maybe you should do something about them. Or maybe not.

Grabbing a pillow you screamed into it and you would’ve kept going if your phone hadn’t rung.

“Heya Sammy.”

“Hey Y/N. Dean said you were coming over?”

“Oh yeah, I was actually on my way over there.”

“Cool. Uhh…”

“Something wrong Sam?” you could hear that tone in his voice. There was something going on, something he wasn’t telling you.

“No uh. No. Nothing.”

“Right. Well, I’ll be over in a couple of minutes,” deciding to go for some shorts and a cute tee you put on your sneakers before going to the kitchen and picking up the pies you had made.

Sam’s call had left you unsettled, but you couldn’t put your finger on what could possibly be wrong. Aside from your worries, you were just glad to be able to see your friends again. Walking in through the backyard you saw everyone was already here. Castiel, Benny, Garth, Kevin, and even Jo and Meg were here. You saw Kevin, Garth, Benny, and Jo on the porch laughing at something Garth had said. Meg and Cas were sitting down by the pool and you had to smile.

Those two had been walking around each other neither confessing their feelings. Everyone else was probably oblivious to what was going on between those two, but you had known both of them well to know that their snarky comments towards each other were to try and mask their true feelings.  

You saw Sam walking over towards you and laughed as he wrapped you in a hug.

“Long time no see stranger,” you said laughing.

“We were starting to really miss you around here,” he said as he let you go.

“Well, I hope these pies make up for it.”

“Oh, you are awesome.”

“I know,” you said in a nonchalant shrug.

“Alright come on. Everyone wants to say hi.”

Been around everyone reminded you how much you had missed them. It had been weeks since you had come together. Getting back to work had kept you all busy, but everyone acted as if no time had passed. As if it was barely yesterday that you had all been together.

“Y/N!” Jo had stood up from her chair and was making her way over to you as you stepped onto the porch. “It is so good to see you again.”

“It’s good to see everyone. How’ve you been?”

“Busy. The new bar is up and running, but work is never done.”

“No, it is not. By the way, how are you and Benny doing?” you looked around noticing Benny had gone inside, but you still kept your voice low. Jo was never one to talk about her private life to just anyone. The only reason you figured she told you stuff was because she had known you the longest and you weren’t one to discuss your private life either.

Jo tried to look away but it did nothing to conceal the faint blush rising to her cheeks. “We’ve uh, we’ve been doing really good so far.”

“The other guys know?”

“Yeah. We asked they didn’t make a big deal out of it.”

“Well, I can tell he makes you act like a teenage girl with her first crush so he must be good.”

“Oh, he’s really good.”

“We need a girl’s night. I want all the details.”

“Next Saturday?”

“You’re on.”

You went over to the other guys, everyone seeming to be in good spirits Sam’s call almost forgotten. Not seeing him outside you went to go see if he was in the kitchen. You stopped as you stepped in through the back door. Dean. Dean was standing there with another woman. And they were kissing. She was all over him, but could you blame her? I mean look at the man. But did they really need to be going at it here? Ignoring the tight feeling in your chest you turned to leave. Oh god, you had been standing there for too long.

“Y/N.” Great. Turning around you saw Sam coming down the stairs. On one side you were grateful Sam had been the one to call your name, but on the other, you had been wishing to slip away unnoticed.  

“Hey Sam I was uh-I came looking for you,” you were purposefully trying not to look at Dean. You didn’t care if it was noticeable or not. If you looked at him every emotion going through you would be plastered on your face. It would be so obvious.

You noticed Sam shooting a look at Dean, but you didn’t know what that was about. “Yeah sorry I had a work call.”

“Sam it’s the weekend,” you rolled your eyes.

“I know, I know. Let’s-”

“Hi, I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Krystal. Dean’s girlfriend.”

Oh. You tried not to cringe at her frilly voice and ignored the way she looked you up and down.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Y/N,” you gave her a tight smile.  It wasn’t real, but what were you supposed to do? Dean had a girlfriend. Of course, that explained why he never made a move on you. He didn’t like you. You wanted to slap yourself. Why hadn’t you seen it coming?

“Hey, where’s-” Jo’s voice stopped mid-sentence and you could feel her behind you probably scrutinizing the scene in front of her. “There you are. Sam, there is a problem with your grill. Y/N, Meg was asking for you.”

She wrapped her arm around your shoulders Sam and her bickering about something as the three of you made your way outside. Sam said your name and you knew there was a question involved but your mind was still in that scene back there.

“Sorry what?” you saw him and Jo share a look, but you didn’t have it in you to question them about it.

“I asked if you wanted a beer,” you knew there was something else he wanted to say but you just said yeah and went to go talk with the others. The whole afternoon felt like you were in overdrive. You didn’t want to see Dean. Those times when your eyes did find him, he was there with her always by his side. Now you knew where Dean’s feelings were at, but yours were all over the place. The feelings that had been developing for him were strong and real, but now that he was with somebody else your feelings were scattered and you were left to pick them up.

For the next few weeks, you avoided him to prevent the pain from becoming intolerable. If he wasn’t even yours why did it hurt so much? Sam and Jo had tried calling you a few times, but you avoided the topic. What was the point of expressing your undying love for Dean now when he clearly didn’t feel the same way?

A knock on your door pulled you away from your thoughts and you went to open it. “Sam, hey what are you doing here?” you asked.

“Well,” he shrugged, “since you didn’t want to meet for lunch yesterday and you didn’t pick up the phone the day before that and you have also avoided Jo I decided to pay a visit,” he smiled. That charming smile of his that you knew you couldn’t resist. And he also knew.

“Fine. You can come in.”

He stepped into your apartment making his way to your kitchen. He took a seat in one of your stools at the counter as you moved around your kitchen trying to figure out what to cook for dinner. And also avoiding him.

“So what’s going on?” Right to the point. Of course, you knew you couldn’t avoid him forever, but you had also hoped not to have this conversation.

“What do you mean? I’ve just been busy with school.”

“Right. And this behavior has nothing to do with Dean’s new girlfriend,” welp there it was. Sam was smart, but you had hoped your attitude had come out as indifferent and not that you were hurt Dean was seeing someone else.

“Hey, I have nothing against your brother seeing someone,” you said.

“I think you do,” he just wouldn’t drop it.

You heaved a sigh. “Sam-”

“Y/N. I know you have feelings for Dean. Hell everyone knows. Except maybe his dumbass,” you snorted a laugh. “But he’s completely clueless and I know that you’re feelings towards him are true so maybe you should talk with him.”

“Sam I’m not going to come in between him and his girlfriend. If he hasn’t made a move he’s clearly not interested,” you turned rummaging through your fridge,

“Maybe you should ask him,” you nearly dropped what you were holding upon hearing Dean’s voice.  

You turned glaring at Sam first. He held his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t know you were stopping by.”

“The door was open.”

“Right,” you cleared your throat. Oh god, things were going to be awkward.

“Anyway I should go,” said Sam. Trying to make a run from the tension in the room. Standing up he clapped his brother in the back before giving you an encouraging smile which you did not find encouraging at all.

“So-” you began.

“Listen I didn’t know you felt that way about me,” you could hear your heart breaking right there and then. You knew what his next words were going to be and you couldn’t bear to hear them.

“It doesn’t matter,” you rushed to say. “It was just a simple crush and I’m glad you found someone. You guys are good together.”

He nodded. “You’re a great person and you deserve someone good.”

You wished he hadn’t said that. It hurt more than seeing him with somebody else. You wanted to scream into the void. Unrequited love was a bitch.

The next few weeks were spent avoiding Dean at any cost. You had just wanted to erase that whole encounter in your apartment. With winter break around the corner, you were so excited to have found an apartment not far from the school you worked. Thankfully packing took your mind off of Dean. At first you had a tough debate with yourself about whether moving was the best option. Was it because of Dean? Yes. Was this being too dramatic? Also yes but you couldn’t live right in front of the man you loved knowing he didn’t love you back. But the bigger reason was for yourself. You needed a change.

Deciding to take a break from packing you decided to order some takeout and put on a movie. Thirty minutes later you went to answer the knock at your door. You were met with familiar green eyes when you opened the door, your food in his hands and you couldn’t help but notice that his hair was a little damp and so was his jacket. He had probably been outside.

You had no idea what to say. He was there, but you had no words.

“What are you - uh - what are you doing here?” you managed to ask.

“Brought your takeout,” he said holding the bag up.

“Right. Come in,” it was awkward and you couldn’t stand it anymore, thus one of the reasons you were moving.  

“You’re moving?” something in his voice made you look up at him, his green eyes scanning your apartment full of moving boxes.

“Oh...yeah. I found an apartment closer to school. Makes things simpler,” he set down the food at your counter but didn’t move.

“This is because of what happened isn’t it?” he wasn’t looking at you, he was visibly shaking. From the cold, you thought.

“Here. You should take off your wet clothes.”

“No, no Y/N I- I need to talk to you. I’m probably too late, but I wanted to apologize.”

“Dean for what?”

“For hurting you.”

“Dean-”

“No, listen. I lied ok. I lied to you and I lied to myself. That day after I heard you and Sam I couldn’t stop thinking about you. And I realized that maybe your feelings weren’t one-sided.”

Your heart was beating a mile a minute. Was this real? Never in your wildest dreams would Dean be confessing his love for you. Ok, maybe you had dreamed about it.

His eyes still wouldn’t meet you. His hands were resting at his sides and when you went over to take hold of one you could feel him shaking. He didn’t pull away, but his eyes finally found your face.

“Let’s get you out of these wet clothes first,” you went to move when his hands were suddenly cradling your face and his lips were on yours. His nose was cold and so were his cheeks, but his lips were soft and warm. Those lips that you had dreamed of kissing were on yours now.

He pulled away, his lips brushing against your when he spoke. “Please don’t say it’s too late.”

“I can never stop loving you,” he kissed you again and you could feel the smile on his lips.

“Be my new girlfriend?” he asked when he pulled away again.

You can feel the green eyes playfully glaring at you through the rearview mirror. Sam remarking that an old lady on a scooter just passed you, and you have to stifle your own laugh. Eileen is sitting on the other side of the car seat, cooing at your newborn, her hand splayed on her own growing bump. She catches you mid-laugh sending you a questioning look, and you do your best to explain Sam’s joke, hating that she was unintentionally being left out. ‘Extra slow,’ you sign to the best of your ability, ‘turtle moves faster.’ Eileen giggles causing Sam to turn around, you swear you can actually see him falling even more in love with her.

“Oh, and you think Sammy’s gonna be any better?” Dean huffs, and you roll your eyes at him. “At least our kid won’t be living on rabbit food his whole life.” You do your best to interpret, knowing that Eileen doesn’t have a clear view of Dean’s face. 

“Y’know a healthier diet–” Sam tries, but you all know Dean isn’t gonna have it.

“It's bad enough you got the girls eating that health food crap, you ain’t gonna get me too. All Y/N’s wanted for the last month is a double bacon cheeseburger, Eileen too, and all they have to do is say the word and I’m gettin’ them both the greasiest burgers I can find.”

There’s a look of absolute betrayal written on Sam’s face as he turns around to eye you and Eileen. You smile shyly, and shrug your shoulders. 

“A girl can only take so much broccoli and kale, Sam,” you offer. “It was for the baby, but now that he’s here…” You promised Eileen solidarity over a half-gallon of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream a week ago, knowing that Sam wouldn’t let either of you off of his ever-growing health food kick. You had dealt with it your whole pregnancy, and Eileen still had a few more weeks to go, as much as you hated it, it was only fair. “Make you a deal, if you cook it, I’ll eat it, same goes for Dean. But you gotta let us have some junk food every once in a while.” 

Eileen looks relieved at your compromise. Sam could in no way force her to do anything, but all he had to do was give her his signature puppy dog eyes, and she would cave. You turn your attention back to baby Bobby, hoping that the rumble of the Impala would keep him asleep until you got back to the Bunker. No such luck. You’d read that car rides were supposed to calm babies, lull them to sleep, but you’d already been in the car far too long. It should’ve only taken thirty minutes to get back home from the hospital, but with the way Dean was currently driving, ten miles under the speed limit, stopping at every yellow light, it’s already approaching forty-five minutes. Bobby’s eyes opened first, they were still mostly gray with small specs of green taking in his surroundings.

You lean forward, smiling widely at you son, sandy blonde hair sticking out from the blue beanie. You couldn’t believe how much hair he already had, and the image of Sam and Eileen’s daughter's head being covered in chestnut locks made you laugh to yourself. Bobby squirms in the carrier, letting out a small huff, and smacking his lips. You can see that it’s only a matter of a few minutes before little Bobby’s screams will be filling the small space. He’s hungry or maybe he needs a diaper change? Either way, it’s not something you can do in the back seat off the Impala. 

“Uh, De?” You keep your voice as light as you can, and he responds with a grunt. “You should step on it already.” 

“No way, kid,” he shakes his head. “I ain’t going any faster. We got precious cargo in the back seat.” 

Your heart flutters at Dean’s words. Neither of you ever thought kids were in the cards for you, a hunter’s life was no way for a kid to grow up. You know Sam and Eileen had felt the same way, and when Billie’s plan succeeded, you weren’t surprised when they announced not even a month after you that they were also expecting. With Chuck and Amara both gone, Jack was running Heaven with Cas at his side, all of you had semi-retired. Sam and Dean were still working the occasional hunt, Eileen joining them, but you were done, opting to help with research and training the next generation of hunters. 

Eileen continued to hunt throughout the first few months of her pregnancy, none of you could’ve stopped her even if you wanted to. It wasn’t until she was almost hurt that she decided to temporarily stop hunting, though you expect once baby Deanna is born, she and Sam will fully retire. 

Bobby stirs again, and you can see the tears welling in his eyes, you’re running out of time and fast. You lean forward as Eileen makes her own attempt to stop the waterworks before they happen. 

“Well, your son is gonna have a break down soon if we don’t get him outta this damn car seat.”

Y/N had been there for him when he hit rock bottom, too. A string of terrible relationships with women who would never hold a candle to her. That is why they failed. He knew that going in and yet, he kept going. For the last few years, she has been the only woman for him. He tries to make her see it, between douchebags, but he can never get through to her. He has been biding his time. Maybe, just maybe, tonight she’ll listen to him.

Because, he is an innocent man in this situation. He has never hurt her, has never lied to her. He hates seeing her like this. If she opens that door, lets someone in, fearful of a touch, living with the anger of having been a fool. She will not listen to anyone so nobody tells her a lie. For three weeks, he stops over each night after work to find her in this state of pain and anguish. With measured movements, he lowers himself to the sofa beside her, pulling her blanket a little tighter around her. Y/N involuntarily flinches at the soft touch. 

Sniffling and wiping at her eyes, Y/N pushes him away. “I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

“I know you don’t, sweetheart, and you don’t have to. I wasn’t sure if you wanted to see me either, but I wanted to see you. See how you’re holding up,” Dean’s soft voice rumbles through her small living room. 

Dean murmurs gently, his words encroaching further on her space. “I’m not going to talk to you if that’s not what you want. Please call me later, Y/N. You can’t ignore me forever. Let me know you’re okay.” 

“I don’t owe you an explanation, Dean,” she snaps, immediately regretting her words, her tone. Dean is always here. Each and every time she fails, he is right here to mend her broken pieces. “I’m sorry.” 

“No, you don’t owe me anything, Y/N/N. I just want you to feel better, and I’ll do anything to see you smile again,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to her temple. “I’ll be back tomorrow.” 

With that, Dean rises from the worn sofa, dropping an envelope from his jacket pocket before turning and leaving, the door clicking loudly behind him. He uses the spare key she gave him to secure the lock, a heavy sigh leaving his lips. “I love you, Y/N.”

~*~

The daily alarm wakes her from a fitful slumber. Y/N blinks slowly, trying to clear the cobwebs of sorrow and tears from her heavy eyes. The first rays of sunlight dance across flecks of dust floating in the air, landing on the cluttered coffee table, illuminating the plain white envelope, her name written across the front in Dean’s simple block lettering. 

A small hand snakes out from the beneath the warm blanket, snatching the envelope from its resting place. With shaking fingers, Y/N opens it and scans the letters scrawled across the page. She takes a deep breath and starts at the beginning. 

Y/N, 

I know you’ve been through some shit, none of which you deserve. None of it was your fault, so stop blaming yourself. You’ve been my rock so long, I don’t know what I’d do without you by my side. I’ll be here for you through anything, good or bad, come Hell or highwater. 

I know you don't want to hear what I say. I know you're gonna keep turning away. But, I've been there and if I can survive, then I know you can, too. I can keep you alive. I'm not above going through it again, for you. I’ll do anything for you. 

I know you’re only protecting yourself. I know you’re thinking of somebody else. Someone who hurt you, but I’m not above making up for the love you’ve been denying you could ever feel. I'm not above doing anything to restore your faith if I can. Faith in humanity, in men, in me. 

I’ve held on to these feelings for you so long, too afraid to open my big mouth and lose the best thing that ever happened to me. But I can’t keep it to myself any more. I don’t just want to be the one to comfort you when you’re hurting, I want to be the one to protect you and keep you safe, so you don’t hurt anymore. I want to be the reason you smile, because you’ve been mine since the moment we met. 

Some people say they will never believe another promise they hear in the dark, because they only remember too well they heard somebody tell them before. I know you’ve heard them before, but this is my first promise to you, I will never make you a promise I don’t intend to keep. 

I don’t want to sleep alone every night. I want you by my side, to curl into you, create a safe space for you to just be, to feel, to be loved. 

But, I've been there and if I can survive, I can keep you alive. I'm not above going through it again. I'm not above being cool for a while, so if you're cruel to me I'll understand. That's your decision, but I'm not below anybody I know if there's a chance of resurrecting a love. I'm not above going back to the start to find out where the heartache began. To hold you until you believe the promises I whisper. To hold you until you believe that I’ll never hurt you. To hold you until you believe in you, in me...in us. 

I’d never do anything to ruin what we have. I guess some people hope for a miracle cure, or some people just accept the world as it is. But, I'm not willing to lay down and die without you, not without a fight. I’ll fight for us, but more importantly, I’ll fight for you. 

All my love always, 

Dean

Through the tears, Y/N reads his letter over and over until she can no longer see. Wiping her eyes, she unlocks her phone and shoots him a text. With new found resolve, she jumps in the shower. When she emerges from the steam, feeling better than she has in months, she finds her best friend sitting on her sofa. 

“Thank you for coming, Dean. After I pushed you away last night, I didn’t know if you would,” she whispers, taking a seat next to him. 

“I’ll always be here when you need me, or want me. You know that, Y/N,” Dean assures her, taking her hands in his. “I see you read my letter.” 

“It’s always been you, I was just too scared and selfish, and foolish to see it,” she replies, shaking her thoughts loose. “I never thought my feelings would be reciprocated. Nobody’s ever written me a love letter before.”

“I knew I couldn’t say all of that out loud, I was so scared to say anything, I didn’t want to lose you. I guess we’re a couple of idiots, huh?” Dean chuckles. 

“We found each other. That’s all that matters,” Y/N smiles, resting her head on his shoulder. 

“I don’t know about you, but I could use a nap,” Dean yawns, running his fingers through her hair. 

“Didn’t sleep well?” she questions, looking up at him. 

“Not when I slept on the floor outside your door.” 

“You did not!” Y/N smacks his shoulder playfully. 

“I bet the neighbors know my name,” he grins sheepishly, pointing at his work shirt, his name clearly on display. 

“Not how you hoped that would happen, is it?” Y/N giggles, teasing him.

“It made you laugh, though. I missed it; your laugh, your smile,” Dean says, cupping her cheek. “I missed you.” 

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles. 

“Don’t be. Where there is no struggle, there is no strength. We will be strong together,” Dean vows. 

“Did you just quote Oprah Winfrey?” she laughs.

“I did. You’re a bad influence on me, what can I say?” he shrugs.

“Let’s get some rest. We can be bad together later,” she winks, rising from her seat and reaching out her hand for him. 

“Can we fight so we can have some angry make-up sex later?” Dean smirks, wiggling his eyebrows. 

“Slow down, Winchester. Nap first. We’re only about ten minutes in, I don’t know if I’m ready to have our first fight yet,” she scoffs. 

“Well, if it helps, it will probably be my fault and I’ll spend hours apologizing,” Dean offers. 

“So the neighbors really know your name?” she giggles. 

“As long as you keep laughing and smiling, I don’t care what they call me, as long as you call me yours.”

Did you like it? The nicest thing you can do for a writer is reblog their work and tell them, and others, how much you like it!

The Whole Enchilada: @iwantthedean @dolphincliffs @mrswhozeewhatsis @flamencodiva @blacktithe7  @amanda-teaches @hannahindie  @kickingitwithkirk  @wi-deangirl77 @hobby27 @gh0stgurl @alleiradayne @idreamofplaid @manawhaat @crashdevlin  @emoryhemsworth  @fangirlxwritesx67 @winchesterprincessbride @waywardbeanie @jensengirl83 @anathewierdo  @winchest09

“Come on. Let's go home. He is my brother but what he did is unforgivable. You deserve better than him.” Sam tugged at your hands.

“No. I'll stay and you have to stay too. You're the best man in the wedding.”

“Okay but I won't leave your side.” He said.

But I can see us

Lost in the memory

August slipped away into a moment in time

'Cause it was never mine

And I can see us twisted in bedsheets

August sipped away

Like a bottle of wine

'Cause you were never mine

Lying in your bed, your bodies slick with sweat, you lingered in the afterglow, lost in the heat and silk of his skin. Your chest heaved as you panted, trying to come down from the high. Face turned towards the man you loved, you let out a sigh of content with a small smile tugging at the corners of the lips. He pulled you closer to him. Goosebumps erupted on your body as he drew imperfect, little circles on the bare skin of your back.

“Are you okay?” Dean softly asked.

“I'm more than okay.” You said and traced his jawline with your fingertips. He leaned into your touch as his emerald eyes looked into yours.

“De-” your mouth fell open in an inaudible moan, when his hands slid down your back, his touch igniting a million fire on your body. “You're insatiable.”

“I can't help it, not with you lying naked next to me.” Dean said before leaning in to claim your lips with his. Your hands move up to his neck, your fingers entangling in his hair. He let go of your lips and stared at you with a look of adoration.

“Stay.” The word slipped out before you could have stopped yourself. You closed your eyes to brace yourself for the impact and also to hide the tears that were starting to pool in your eyes, as you felt his hand go limp.

“You know I can't do that.” The guilt in Dean’s voice surprised you. You had expected a much more harsh answer but instead you heard those words dripping with guilt.

“You can't be with both of us. You have to choose.” You said.

“I-”

“Lisa is my best friend. I can't do that to her. Please.” You pleaded.

Back when we were still changing for the better

Wanting was enough

For me, it was enough

To live for the hope of it all

Cancel plans just in case you'd call

And say "Meet me behind the mall"

So much for summer love, and saying "Us"

'Cause you weren't mine to lose

“I told him to choose between us and he did.” You told the younger Winchester.

“My brother was miserable when he was with her. I thought he had finally come to his senses when you told me about you two but then two months later I got a call from him saying that he is marrying Lisa. I'm so sorry, Y/N.” You could hear the sorrow in his voice but you didn't feel anything. You were numb. Sam wanted nothing more than to beat his brother into a pulp for his wrong doing. He was always in love with you but he never uttered a single word because of his brother.

You still remembered that day - the day when you had received a call from Lisa saying that she was engaged after for a whole month all your phone calls to Dean had gone straight to voicemail because he had left you abruptly one morning. You had barely ended the phone call before breaking down in tears on the floor. If it wasn't for Sam, you wouldn't have been back on your feet. He had been a tremendous support.

“Loving him was painful. I never thought love hurts so bad.” You sniffled when you saw the first dance come to a heartbreakingly beautiful end.

“Then it isn't true love. Being in love shouldn't hurt. Let him go.” Sam said.

“I have but the memories of those days still keep haunting me. Why does it hurt so bad to let him go when he wasn't even mine in the first place?” You sniffled. Sam took the drink from your hand placing it on the counter top before hugging you tight.

“Come on, let's get out of here.” Sam coaxed you, making you nod. You needed to get away from him even if it meant ending things with Lisa because you wouldn't be able to see Dean play house with your best friend. Sam gently guided you out of the room. Once outside when the cool air hit your face, you broke down like never before.

Remember when I pulled up

And said "Get in the car"

And then canceled my plans

Just in case you'd call

Back when I was living for the hope of it all

“Let it out.” He whispered, his heart breaking for you. You turned around in his arms and clung onto his biceps tightly, burying your face into his chest, your tears and smeared makeup messing up his white shirt underneath his tux.

“Maybe I wasn't enough for him.” You hiccuped through your tears.

“No.” Sam’s stern voice made you look up. “Don't blame yourself.”

“He didn't think about us for once if there was even an us to begin with. He just left, chose her. I should have known. I should've never hoped.” You said.

“You deserve a better man who would have you as his first priority. Someone who would put your name at the top of their list.” Sam said.

“Those men are only in Hallmark movies and Jane Austen books-” before you could even complete your sentence, you felt Sam’s lips on yours. Even though you were taken aback at first but then you melted into his touch.

“Tell me to stop and I will. Just say the word.” He spoke against your lips, his hot breath still fanning your face.

“Don't stop.” And that's all it took before he captured your lips for the second time. There wasn't any urgency or lust in his kiss instead it was filled with love and adoration. Your hands travelled up to the nape of his neck, pulling him closer. His hands grasp your waist.

“I know it's a little awkward and weird-” you didn't know who ended the kiss first but you heard Sam speak first, “I always liked you from the very beginning when you came into the barbecue party with a crate of beer in that purple floral dress.” You laughed at his description. “But you were my brother's girlfriend-”

“Hardly his girlfriend, more like an easy lay for him.” You spit out.

“I'm sorry you feel that way but if you'll allow me I would gladly show you how a proper Winchester man treats his girl,” Sam smirked.

“What about Dean?”

“What about him? He let go of you. He is now married and you're not his property. I love my brother but I will deal with him if he has any problem with us being together.” Sam assured you.

“Okay. Then let's give us a chance but I need some time before I am ready to date another man.”

“Take all the time you need. I'll be waiting for you patiently.” He smiled. “Loving me won't hurt you because I will always be there to catch you when you fall.”

“I’m perfectly capable of cleaning up after myself.”

“Sure you are,” you snorted. “Listen, I’m gonna pack up and go — let you and your new roomie get acquainted. Thanks for letting me make a pit stop.”

Dean nodded, still watching the doorway for the Roomba to come back and attack him. “Yeah, of course, Y/N/N. Anytime.”

You put a couple books in your backpack, yelling to Dean you were taking them for research purposes but would be back through to return them before too long. After donning your jacket, you hugged Dean tight, told him to be nice to the Roomba, and made way for the door. 

Before you could open the door all the way, the wind blew it all the way open and knocked you back a couple of steps. The green sky was blurred by hard raindrops falling in thick sheets over the open Kansas land. Three steps out the door and you were turned around, pounding on the door, begging Dean to let you back in, out of the rain. 

“Dang, kid, you were gone for like thirty seconds,” Dean noted, helping you out of your jacket after you dropped your backpack by the closed door. 

Shivering already, you hugged your arms around your chest to give you some sort of warmth. “Yeah, it’s really coming down out there. We should check the radar.”

“Let’s get you in dry clothes and warmed up first.”

He led you to his room, tossed you a towel and a t-shirt, and showed you how the shower worked. He encouraged you to get warmed up and comfortable, and he would check the weather. 

The water warmed your body quickly; you made a mental note to give Dean shit about keeping the bunker so cold. You weren’t soaked through, but thanks to the temperature inside, you had felt nearly frozen. 

“Maybe if he wouldn’t wear so many layers,” you mumbled to yourself as you dried off. You slipped your mostly dry underpants over your legs, pulled Dean’s shirt over your head, then went to figure out where in the bunker he had landed. 

You found him drinking from a tumbler of whiskey while wrapping up a phone call with Sam. 

“He called to check on us because there’s a bad storm system coming in. Told him we were well aware,” Dean chuckled. “Apparently there’s a tornado warning. Sirens went off while you were in the shower.”

You leaned against the table next to him. “Thank goodness we’re in a fortress, essentially. Want me to whip up some dinner? I know you just had that sandwich.”

Dean gave you a look. “I could still eat. As long as you can do so without making a messing and bringing out the freaky little cleaning monster.”

You laughed and headed for the kitchen. In a little under an hour, you had put together a salad, cooked some chicken, and had cookies baking for after dinner. Once you were finished mashing potatoes, you’d be set. 

Dinner was mostly quiet, with the two of you eating your fill, and Dean getting into the cookies almost as soon as they were out of the oven. He was nice enough to do the dishes on his own so you could go check on your clothes in the dryer. 

“Shit,” you mumbled under your breath. “Helps to actually start the dryer, Y/N.”

Rolling your eyes at yourself, you shut the door again and pressed the button extra hard, waiting to hear the machine start rolling before you left the laundry room. 

“Where’d you go?” you called when you returned to the kitchen to find no Dean around. He had washed the dishes the two of you ate off of, but hadn’t put any of the leftovers away. Sighing, you took care of that, scrubbed the pots and pans and set them to dry before going in search of Dean. 

He was in the Dean Cave, a fresh bottle of whiskey and two tumblers on the table beside his chair. You dropped into the other recliner, snagging the throw blanket from Dean’s chair to keep your legs warm. 

“Is there anyway you could pretend to be a human who doesn’t need to be wrapped in a minimum of three layers of clothing at all times so the rest of us don’t have to freeze our asses off when we’re here?”

“Pansy.”

He got up to go change the temperature, and you used the opportunity to grab the remote and change the channel to something you could both enjoy watching. Dean gave you a little shit over it but poured you a glass of whiskey just the same. 

Watching that movie turned into a drinking game which turned into the both of you getting plastered. The bottle of whiskey was nearly empty by the time you called it a night. 

“If the weather’s clear in the morning, I’ll be out of your hair not long after I’m up,” you promised, yawning at the end of the sentence. 

Dean put his arms around your shoulders. “You don’t have to rush off, you know. Sammy’s gone till Monday, that storm system is moving through …”

“You’ve been here without Sam before, and I’ll be that storm system will be through after tonight.”

“Whatever. It’s just been, ya know, nice to have you around for more than two seconds and without all the monster guts.”

You giggled. “You could have ruined that monster guts part if you had attacked the Roomba. Thank goodness I was here to protect you.”

You went up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek, whispered a Good night, Dean, then headed to find an empty room to crash in for the night. The whiskey had nearly lulled you to sleep, and far be it from you to deny yourself a good, drunk sleep. 

“Y/N, wait!” Dean called, jogging after you down the hallway. 

You turned too fast to face him, so you backed up against the nearest wall, mentally thanking it for holding you up. You raised your brow at Dean, silently asking after his request for you to wait. He leaned against the opposite wall and smirked. 

“I mean to tell you earlier, but then there was tornadoes and food … you look real good in my t-shirt.”

You smirked, too. “Oh, this old thing? It is pretty comfortable. Can’t say I was entirely upset about my clothes not getting dried.”

“Me neither.”

He stepped away from the wall, stopping in the middle of the hallway. “Maybe, for safety, we should bunk together tonight. You know, like … like …”

“The buddy system?” you supplied.  

Dean snapped his fingers. “The buddy system, yes, exactly! Whadda ya say?”

“I say …” You licked your lips and did your best to stand up a little straighter. “If you take another step, I won’t be responsible for my actions at this point in time, with this level of whiskey-ness in my system.”

“Whiskey-ness,” Dean chuckled, indeed taking another long step and closing the gap between the two of you. He leaned against one hand on the wall behind you and caressed your jaw with the thumb of his other hand. “So, these actions you won’t be responsible for — you gonna blame them on the ‘whiskey-ness’ in the morning?”

“Maybe,” you whispered, pushing yourself up to place a soft kiss against his lips, “maybe not. One way to find out. You game?”

Dean pretended to think it over for a few seconds before taking your face in both of his hands and kissing you with an eagerness you had missed in your most recent lovers … which, honestly, hadn’t been all that recent. 

Outside the bunker, tornado sirens wailed over the plains. You tensed up, breaking the kiss and huddling into Dean’s chest. 

“It’s really bad out there,” you commented, eyes wide. 

“Don’t worry, sweetheart,” Dean said, sliding his hands over your ass before tugging you up so your legs were wrapped around him and he could carry you to his bed. “I’ve got you.”

The Whole Shebang: @illisea @ashleymalfoy @busybee612 @mrswhozeewhatsis @sherlock44 @ravenesque @feelmyroarrrr @atc74  @theplaidshirtmadness  @blacktithe7 @moonlessnight14 @kitchenwitchsuperwhovian @smoothdogsgirl  @melbrandes  @xtina2191 @spnbaby-67 @emoryhemsworth @goldenolaf25 @gabriels-trix @applesugar88 @rainflowermoon @deansgirl215 @thisismysecrethappyplace @calaofnoldor @jerkbitchidjitassbutt @sleepylunarwolf @chances-and-miracles @sandlee44 @foxyjwls007 @cpag7 @deanwanddamons​

Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Let your heart be light

From now on

Our troubles will be out of sight

Across the small town, snow covered the streets of Lawrence, Kansas, the massive, fluffy flakes continuing to fall as the street lights came on that evening. The town was quiet, the blanket of snow muffling the ambient sound in the winter evening. Just south of downtown sat the city’s one modest fire station. The golden brick building was glittering with red and white twinkle lights, the glow lighting up the street for a few feet in either direction. Music could be heard bumping on the sidewalk from inside the building, its inhabitants sure to be enjoying their company Christmas party. 

Inside, the common room was filled to the brim with the entirety of the company and their loved ones. The kids were chasing each other around the bases of the fire poles. A few of the older ones knew enough to jump full force on the metal to pull open the chute at the top, entertaining the younger ones each time the plastic split open, their giggles chiming in with the festive holiday music the Captain had found in his playlists earlier that day. 

Food and drink littered the expanse of the countertops. Anything one could have been craving was set out for the group to enjoy. Dean was pouring himself a soda since this was his year to be on shift during the party and he had to behave. The fireman had grumbled about it when he stopped by his best friend’s apartment to drop off the ingredients for her taco dip. The taco dip she had only agreed to make for him if he purchased the product. After all, the woman had already made a few dozen sugar cookies for the festivities as her own contribution this year. She politely reminded him then that he could get as pissed as he wanted next year. Not that her words much appeased the Winchester. 

The first responder turned to his buddy and coworker, who was filling another bowl with his famous chili, and held up the red plastic cup with a mock look of disgust, “What is the point of Coke if it doesn’t come with any Jack?” 

“A suga’ rush?” The Cajun drawled in his signature accent. Dean snorted, bringing the cup to his lips when the object was snatched from his hand before the two could meet. 

“Hey--” he spun on his heel, coming to face to face with his best friend. Her eyes were narrowed as she looked over the rim of the cup at him. “Come on, you don’t want that, there’s no rum.”

“Sure,” the woman wet her lower lip before taking a sip of the soda that Dean had poured for himself. 

“Satisfied?” He quirked an eyebrow at her, holding out his hand for his drink back. 

“For now,” she admonished. “But I’m watching you, Winchester.” 

“That’s hurtful, Y/n/n.” Dean placed his hand over his heart, giving his friend the puppy dog look that he had learned from his little brother. A peak of a smile tugged on the corners of her lips as she looked at him before it faltered once again. Finally, she relented and gave the drink back to its rightful owner. 

“I’d say more like rightfully cautious,” the other firefighter chimed in on their conversation, earning an elated grin from the woman standing across from him. Y/n clapped her hands together like a child, her tongue peeking between her teeth as she bounced on her toes. Placing his arm over Dean’s shoulder, Benny added, “Right, Dean-o?”

“You two are incorrigible,” Dean lamented, shrugging his friend’s arm away from him. The pair laughed at Dean’s irritation as Y/n scooted her way in between Dean and the drink table. 

Dean internally cringed as Benny chose then to walk away, leaving the two friends alone for the first time that evening. The thing was, the air between the two friends was actually colder than the snow that blanketed the town outside the fire station. He knew that Y/n was putting on a show for everyone in the station since she couldn’t get out of going to the party last minute, which he also knows she would have preferred. The woman was as much a part of their work-family as she was her own family. That was what happened when best friends were joined at the hip for over fifteen years. There was no way she was getting out of going without raising suspicion, and Y/n was too private of a person to deal with answering questions that her absence would have surely raised. 

As much as people like to think they know the real woman, she only has ever fully opened up to two people in her life, her mother and Dean. No one else has ever stuck around long enough to try and break down that wall that she had put up around herself. If Dean wasn’t just as stubborn as her he might have stopped trying a long time ago, but he was determined to get to know the real woman no matter how hard she seemed to try to stop him. 

In the grand scheme of things, he supposes that’s is why it was so easy for them to fall into their friends with benefits relationship. One post-breakup, alcohol-fueled night in bed together two years ago had begun the whole thing. It didn’t take them long after they woke the next morning to realize the cliche arrangement could be just what both of them needed. Even still, Dean could count on his hands how many times in total they had spent in the other’s bed. 

The most recent of which just happened to be last night. Dean had stopped by with dinner for his friend and the ingredients for the dip he had conned her into making. A few glasses of wine later, as it usually did go, and the two of them enjoyed their time together. But it wasn’t the sex that was the problem, it was the conversation after. 

Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Make the yuletide gay

From now on

Our troubles will be miles away

Dean ran a hand through his sweaty hair as Y/n climbed from the bed in search of her strewn articles of clothing. She picked up the various garments, throwing them in her hamper as she passed by it and into her ensuite bathroom. 

“Why are you so quiet?” Dean’s voice carried across the room and over the sound of the shower starting. He pulled himself out of the bed and slipped on his boxer briefs as he followed after her. 

The woman bit her tongue as she tested the temperature of the water. It was only a matter of time before Dean caught on to her charade. Some days she hates how well he knows her. It’s not that she wants to keep secrets from her best friend but it can be downright creepy when he basically reads her mind. “I’ve been thinking.”

“About?” he questioned, stepping into the bathroom as she climbed into the shower. 

“How to tell you something,”

“Alright, you’re kind of scaring me, Y/n/n,”

Allowing the hot water to cascade down her face and body, Y/n took a deep breath before choosing to answer him, “It’s Sean.”

“As in douchebag Sean?”

“Dean, do you have to call him that?” she sighed, having already expected this reaction from him. 

“Yes, because he is one. You know what, douchebag is the nicest thing I could be calling him right now,” Dean countered, leaning against the bathroom vanity, his arms crossing over his freckled chest at the mention of that prick’s name. 

“He wants to get coffee,” her voice was low, knowing her admission was about to rile up the man on the other side of the curtain. She wasn’t even sure he had heard at first, that was until he whipped the curtain open.

“What?!” 

“Jesus!” Instinctively, her hands flew to protect her modesty as her heart tried to escape from her chest. “Dean, what the hell?”

“I could say the same thing to you! Do you not remember what that jackhole put you through over the last year, because I do. He doesn’t deserve a second of your time.” 

“You think I don’t know that? It’s just coffee, he didn’t ask me to move in with him?” Y/n spit back, her stance relaxing along with her heart. 

“But you and I both know that all it takes is one look at those blue eyes and you’ll be putty in his hands. You can’t go.” The way the last three words came out of his mouth, the definitive tone behind, it them was enough to get her blood boiling underneath her skin. 

“Oh, I can’t? Is that an order, Lieutenant?” The title rolled off her tongue, her eyes hardening as she stared at Dean. “Last time I checked you don’t get to tell me what to do.”

“You know that’s not what this is. Y/n/n, I only want what’s best for you. I don’t want to see him screw up your life again. I was there to pick up the pieces last time and I don’t want to do it again.”

“Well I can guarantee you won’t ever have to do it again,” her voice was low, her words steady even though her eyes were filled with unshed tears. 

“You know that’s --”

“Get out!” she commanded suddenly, stopping him before he could say anything else. Her eyes scrunched closed, willing herself to not look at her closest friend, the one person she was supposed to be able to count on as he let her down. 

“Y/n,”

“I said get out!” 

Here we are as in olden days

Happy golden days of yore

Faithful friends who are dear to us

Gather near to us, once more

That was the last time the two of them said anything to each other until she walked into the fire station a little over two hours ago. He had to give it to her, she was putting on a good show, even messing around with him like usual. But he could see the truth in her eyes when she looked at him. Y/n was pissed, but most of all, she was hurt. 

Dean turned around, leaning against the counter to face her. The woman didn’t acknowledge his presence, instead choose to continue with preparing herself a drink, one with a bit more whiskey than needed, but he wasn’t going to comment on that. “I’m glad you are here,” he tried instead. 

“Well, I haven’t seen Sam and Jessica and the kids in a while, I wasn’t going to miss out on that because you are an ass,” she noted, still choosing to not look at him. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” 

“No, you never do, do you?” She swallowed thickly, turning on Dean, the flicker of a flame telling the experienced first responder it was best not to stoke the fire. The two of them stared at each other for what felt like minutes to them, when in reality, it was merely a few seconds, the bubble they were in being popped by Dean’s niece running and crashing herself into his legs. 

“Uncle Dean!” She cheered, reaching up with her short arms as he bent down to pick her up. He situated the little girl on his hip as she squealed in delight. “Can I have another cookie?” Her tone dropped, the small child looking up at her only uncle from underneath her insanely long lashes. 

“How many is that now?” He asked her, the glint of a smirk on his face. 

“Uh… two,” she held up two fingers, her argument completely unconvincing. 

“Uhhuh, I bet,” Dean grumbled, but he knew in his heart he couldn’t say no to that face. “Okay, one more cookie, but you can’t tell on me to you Daddy. He thinks sugar is for suckers.” 

“Promise.” The little girl held up her pinky to her uncle, one of the first things he ever taught the kid because he knew he was a sucker from day one and he was not trying to get into trouble with his little brother over it. Even if it never worked to his advantage.

Dean held up his pinky and wrapped it around hers. He shrugged to Y/n before taking his niece over to the sweets table. In reality, Dean knew the conversation needed to be over, it wasn’t the time or place, but if there was one thing he hated more than anything it was fighting with Y/n. It felt like a piece of him was missing when he couldn’t talk to her or see her, and if he was being honest with himself that kind of scared him. When he became so codependent on her he couldn’t be sure. It just felt like she had always been there, and always should be, right by his side. 

Clara tried to steal a second cookie as Dean helped her pick out the first, but he knew he would be in it if he let her get away with that one, so he made sure it got put back. When he turned around to set the five-year-old down, he noticed Y/n was gone. He scanned the whole room and couldn’t find her anywhere in the mix of people. 

As suspected, the little girl rushed right to her Daddy, who scowled at his brother. Dean offered a shrug and a smirk as he made his way over to Sam. “Don’t you start with me too.”

“Oh, it’s not me you have to answer to, it’s Jess because she’s the one that has to put her down tonight.” 

“Eh, she’ll forgive me, I’m her favorite brother-in-law,” Dean waved off his brother. 

“You’re her only brother-in-law.” 

“Whatever. Did you see where Y/n went?” 

Sam crossed his arms, his brows rising on his forehead, “Looked like she was headed outside.” Dean pursed his lips, two small dimples forming at the corners. “Did you two fight?” 

“Is it that obvious?” 

“No, but you are all brooding and pensive right now,” Sam moved his hand in a flourish in front of Dean as he spoke. 

“Really?” 

“Yeah, what’s going on with you two?” The taller brother pushed for Dean to talk, and he pondered his pros and cons of answering. 

“Sean wants to have coffee with her?” Dean said, nonchalant. 

“And?” 

“And the guy is a dick, she deserves better.” 

“Better? Like you?” Sam tried to hide the amusement from his features as Dean whipped his head from where he was staring at the door to his little brother. 

“What?” Dean’s voice rose an octave at his brother’s question. 

“Oh come on, I know you guys have been sleeping together for a while now.” 

“Sam, it’s not what you think,” Dean sighed before running his tongue over his bottom lip. “It’s only happened a handful of times.” 

“And?” Sam shook his head, trying to convey his meaning to his brother. “Listen, you guys have known each other for longer than I’ve known Jessica. You spend all your free time together. You are basically a couple which I would say without the sex but we all know you are doing that too, so basically a couple. Why can’t you just man up and tell her how you feel?” 

“Cause I don’t know how I feel? It’s never felt like a relationship with her. It’s just always been easy.” 

“That’s how it should be, Dean. The two of you are perfect for each other. I think you owe it yourselves to at least try.” Sam urged.

“And what if it all blows up?”

“What if it all works out?” Sam countered. “Every relationship is either going to end in forever or end in a breakup, but that doesn’t mean that you just don’t try. Take the leap, Dean.”

“I hate you, you know that,” Dean grimaced, knowing that his brother was right. While he had never thought of Y/n like that before they slept together the first time, he couldn’t ignore the chemistry they had together. She was his other half, he already admits to that, and he would be lying if he said it wasn’t amazing sex. Sam was right, how would admitting anything be different than how they already lived their lives together?

“Yeah, well, I’ll say I told you so at your wedding,” Sam clapped his older brother’s shoulder before running off after his toddler. Dean glared after his brother, he hated when he was right, mostly because Sam loved to say ‘I told you so’. 

Through the years

We all will be together

If the fates allow

Hang a shining star

Upon the highest bough

The firefighter stalked off towards his locker to grab his jacket before following out the doors that lead to the side of the firehouse. If Y/n went out, that’s where she would be, sulking in the shadows. Cold air swirled in to replace the heat from inside as he opened the door, the rush of it sending a chill through his body. He zipped up the coat as he went down the few stairs, finding her sitting there on the stoop. 

“Dean, I don’t want to talk about it,” She sighed when she looked up to see it was him that had followed her. 

“Then just listen?” He quirked one brow at her, waiting for her invitation before taking a seat next to her. “I know that you are hurting and I wanted to start by saying I’m sorry. It was never my intent to hurt you.”

“I know that.”

“I just… I can’t stand seeing you so down. Sean hurt you badly and I didn’t want you to allow him to do it again. You deserve so much more than that.” Dean pulled his arms in closer to his body as the chill of the night set into his bones and the snow continued to fall around them. 

“It was just coffee Dean, not a marriage proposal.”

“Yeah, and I hate that even more,” Y/n looked up then, confusion written all over her features. “Y/n you know that you are the most important thing in my life, next to my brother. Hell, most times you outrank him. When we fight, or you go out of town, it’s like there is a piece of myself missing, I have this hole in my chest that only you can fill. I guess I never really understood what that meant in the grand scheme of things.” 

“Dean,”

“You know I love you right?” He cut her off.

“Of course I do. I love you too,” The word rolled off the tip of her tongue like honey. Like it was the most simple thing in the world. Because she did love him, and she had for as long as she’d known the eldest Winchester. 

“But Y/n/n, I think I’m in love with you,” Dean held her gaze, his amber green eyes searching hers for the words she had yet to utter. The girl across from him could feel her chest filling with emotion, the confession by her favorite firefighter igniting something long dormant inside her. 

“You do?” Tears were threatening to overflow her eyelids, the feeling inside her needing to escape somewhere. She wasn’t in control anymore, her voice cracking with her words. 

“I do,” he nodded, affirming his words to himself as well as her. “And it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way. I just thought that maybe we could give us a chance.” 

“Us?” Dean nodded, at a loss for what she was thinking for the first time in a long time. “I like the sound of that, us.” Y/n repeated the words with a snort,  a coy smile upturning one side of her mouth. Dean’s breath hung in the air as he waited for her to continue. 

“Is that a yes?” 

“Yes, Winchester.” The woman shook her head as he sighed, his body visibly relaxing next to her. Dean took his hand out of his jacket pocket, cupping her cold cheek in its warmth. A bright smile lit up her face as he ran his thumb over her reddened nose and down over her bottom lip. “Just kiss me already.”

“Is that an order?” He threw her words back at her, earning a fist to the chest. Her nose scrunched up as she playfully scowled at him. Dean felt her fingers wrap around the lapels of his jacket before she was pulling him to her, their lips meeting in the middle. Both of them were hesitant, this being their first kiss that wasn’t alcohol-fueled or rushed. Dean opened his mouth to her just as the alarm inside the firehouse sounded sending the two of them apart as if they had been electrocuted. 

“I’ve gotta go,” Dean silently cursed the universe’s timing. 

“Go save lives,” she patted down his jacket against his chest as her fingers unraveled themselves from the material. Dean pecked her chilled nose before getting up and running to the door, pausing as he pulled it open to turn back to her. 

“Wait for me?”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” 

And have yourself a merry little Christmas now