#sugafluff

 “Hey, we’re about to be called up. Ready?” He helps me to sit up, laughing at the state of my hair. No doubt it looks like a bird’s nest. He motions for one of the crew to help me out, a petite makeup artist appearing out of nowhere and touching up my hair.

“Yeah, I’m excited I swear. I just wish I wasn’t so tired.” Sebastian and I rolled in from where we were shooting in the Democratic Republic of the Congo at about ten o’clock this morning. I have yet to recover from the long trip. Unfortunately, our interview was scheduled for tonight, and we stand to begin our course of promoting the movie for the foreseeable future. It’ll still be a few hours before I can crawl into a bed.

“At least it’s only an hour time difference, right?” Sebastian stands me up, instructing me to do some stretching.

“At least we finally have service. I haven’t spoken to my family in three months, they probably think you killed me and left me there in the middle of the jungle.”

One of the perks of our on location shooting was the fact that we only had a couple of satellite phones. No contact with the outside world for nearly three months. I grew way too attached to it, although the one downside was not getting to know how my family and friends were. A lot can happen in three months. I’ve been so rushed to get ready and get over here to the show that I’ve hardly had any time to even glance at my phone besides a cursory text to my group chat with my family letting them know that I’m still alive and back in civilization. 

 “Tempting, but too many witnesses.” Sebastian winks at me, coming to attention when we’re motioned over by one of the staff. Glancing at the TV in the waiting room I can see Graham Norton beginning to introduce us. 

 “Our next guests have just re-entered into civilization, so do excuse them if they’re a little off. Please welcome the dashing Sebastian Stan and lovely Cara Richie!”

Sebastian motions for me to go first, and I jump out into the bright lights. Even though I’ve been on a few shows by now, it never gets old. Granted, I’ve only had one successful blockbuster. Maybe I won’t feel the same once that number starts to climb. 

 I greet Graham before settling down on the couch beside Billie Eilish, the musical guest of the day. I’ve met Billie before, we actually became fast friends. I was invited to a music awards show (I found out that actors are often invited to them for some reason), and we decided to ditch the after party and settle for pizza and a movie instead. 

 “It’s been so long since I’ve seen you, glad to know you’re still alive.” Billie mumbles. 

 “Barely,” I whisper back. Sebastian sits down on the other side of me, waving to a few people in the audience. There are a group of girls near the front row that scream even louder when I look their way, and I smile at them. Sebastian sure does have an affect on people.

“Well, well. Glad to see you’ve made it. Didn’t you two just fly in this morning?” Sebastian jumps in to answer. I appreciate him taking the lead, he definitely has a lot more experience than me. 

 “Sure did. I think you’re trying to kill us, Graham.” Graham gasps, every bit the entertaining host. 

 “Now, Cara,” I smile at the man, hopefully masking my exhaustion. I’m a huge fan of him, and I want to leave a good impression. “This is your second major film. How are you feeling with all of the attention you’ve received? Because really, you came out of nowhere.”

I nod, reminding myself not to depend on Sebastian. “That’s true, I kind of did. It’s been amazing though. I think they sent me off to the middle of nowhere so it wouldn’t go to my head.” Graham laughs, the audience joining in. I sit up a little straighter because of it. 

 “That’s probably smart on their part. Really, from what I’ve seen of the previews for this film, it’s called ‘Young Rising’, correct?” We nod. “Right. It looks quite intense. But you two, you two are lovers in this.”

 I shoot Sebastian a look that tells him we are anything but. “Yeah,” I draw out the word. “You could say that.”

“I really don’t know what they were thinking, putting the two of us together.”

“You mean to say that you don’t like each other at all?” Graham asks, feigning concern.

I shake my head. “I loathe him. But he won’t leave me alone, can you believe it?”

Graham nods. “Actually, I can. After all, you were recently named among the ‘most wanted’ stars in the world.”

I look at Billie completely surprised. “I was?” I ask her. She nods, shrugging her shoulders. 

 “Most wanted? That makes me sound like a criminal!”

“Isn’t that the point?” Sebastian taunts. 

 We continue bickering for a while. “I had no idea, but really I have no clue what’s happened over the past three months.”

Graham hums, shuffling through his papers before coming upon what he was looking for. “Really? Well I find that quite interesting, because something happened just last week on this show.” Suddenly the girls up front start screaming again, hardly able to contain themselves. 

I look at Sebastian. “What did you do?” I whisper. He shakes his head at me, mouthing ‘nothing’. 

 “Alright, calm down you three. I haven’t even gotten the chance to tell her yet, you’re going to spoil the surprise!” WIth great effort the girls pipe down. Graham swivels back to me, a mischievous smile on his face. 

“Oh no, what surprise?” I groan. 

Billie pats my knee. “I know what this is about, it’s been all over twitter. This is what I’m thinking of, right?” Billie asks, shooting me a close-lipped smile. 

“All over twitter? I haven’t had a chance to check twitter.” To be honest, I was putting off checking the hot mess that is social media. Three months of peace and quiet have been so nice, I’m clinging to it before I have to dive back in. 

“Last week, we had a very special musical guest. You’re a fan of BTS, aren’t you?”I nod, furrowing my eyebrows. Where is he going with any of this? 

“Yeah, I love them. We were just listening to them in the car, actually.” I gesture between Sebastian and I. Graham studies us like a textbook, nodding along. 

“That’s perfect! They came on the show last week, it was amazing. Wasn’t it?” The audience cheers and claps in response. “We got to have a little chat before they performed. A nice little heart to heart if you will. Somehow, I have no idea how, we got onto the topic of their love lives.”

We all give him a complimentary laugh, knowing full well how they got onto that topic. Any successful interviewer knows their way around questions to make even the most composed celebrity fidget in their seat until they slip up. 

“Oh did you?” Sebastian prompts Graham on. I know him well enough that he’s just wanting to move on at this point. We’re here to talk about our movie, not BTS. Heaven knows they’re famous enough already.

“Yes. You’ve heard of Suga?” I nod. I know who each of the members are, I really do like them a lot. “Well, he said something quite interesting, er, about you.”

My eyebrows flit up. “About me? He knows who I am?”The audience laughs, the girls in the front are practically causing an earthquake with how much jumping around they’re doing. 

“He most certainly does. In fact, when I asked the boys if there was anyone they had their eye on, they all immediately turned to him! It was difficult to get it out of him, to say the least, but I found out that he’s a big fan of yours. And not just from a professional standpoint, if you know what I mean.” Graham winks at me even as my mouth falls open.

Me?

“You’ll have to watch the clip,” Billie says, nudging me. “It’s been all anyone can talk about all week. It’s been so annoying, I see your name everywhere now.” She laughs, and I pull myself together enough to laugh along with her. I look around, reminding myself that I’m on international television, and word will get around quick if I look like a high schooler that just got asked to the prom by her long-time crush.

Even though that’s exactly what I feel like.

The rest of the interview passes in a blur, Graham even going to far as to show me a couple of tweets with the hashtag, #CaraBTS. I’m just relieved there isn’t some weird couple name trending...yet. 

“Oh, look at this one! You’ll love it.” Graham holds his paper up to the light, reading off of it. “‘This is not a drill, I repeat, this is not a drill. Cara and Yoongi are finally happening. I’ve been pushing for this since I found out she went to school in Seoul!’ It would appear this has been a long time coming for some fans. There are others that aren’t quite as excited though, as you can imagine.” 

Shuffling his papers he pulls out another tweet. “Here we are, ‘I’m telling you if Cara Richie lays a single finger on my lil meow meow I’m suing.’ Well isn’t that lovely?”

We finally move on, Sebastian telling a funny story from our time filming in the Congo. I add in whatever tidbits I can, but I remain so focused on looking normal and unbothered by this new information that I nearly miss Billie getting up to sing. It’s during her performance, when the lights are down low and our mics are turned off that Sebastian nudges me, whispering something under his breath. 

He makes it look like he’s pointing something out on stage, “Hey, you alright?”

I nod along, looking for all the world like we’re chatting about the lighting. It’s true that it looks striking, the dark greens and blues cut across the stage, highlighting Billie’s haunting voice. 

“I think I will be. Is this going to be a disaster? Now all anybody will want to talk about is my love life.”

“Which we both know is nonexistent.”

“Exact-hey!” I shove my friend before turning my attention back to the performance. I still can’t quite relax, but I feel a little better. At least I have Sebastian by my side. He certainly knows how to remain low-key when it comes to the press. 

Once the interview ends the three girls at the front squeal until I look at Sebastian who gives me a shrug.

“I don’t think it’s for me,” he gestures to them. “Look at their sign.”

Sneaking a glance over there my eyes widen and I struggle to keep my mouth from hanging open. One of the girls holds up a little poster that I didn’t see before. She probably wasn’t allowed to hold it up during the show because she would block other people’s view. 

There, written in big bold miss that only a blind man could miss it reads:

                Cara x Yoongi nation

Graham notices my attention from where he’s saying goodbye to Billie and makes his way over to me. He gives me a pat on the back. 

“That,” he points out the sign that is now burned into my eyelids. “Is only the beginning, love.”

🌙

By the time Sebastian and I make it back to the hotel where the rest of the cast and director/producers are staying, I want to lock my door and throw something. 

Sebastian told me not to check twitter, but I ignored him. Curiosity did kill the cat, folks. News flash. 

If I wasn’t known before, I certainly am now. Twitter is a mess of supportive fans, those fans who are heartbroken but happy for Suga, and the fans that are out for blood. Like, real blood. I’ve read the words “better watch out” so many times that I can’t help but look over my shoulder every few minutes. 

I do appreciate the fans that claim that only true ARMY will support the boys’ decisions. Nevertheless, I decide to hold off any kind of presence on social media until further notice. A glance at the official BTS twitter shows them doing the same thing, apparently. I’m not sure whether I should be relieved or worried about that.

“I told you not to,” Sebastian chides once we enter the hotel. “Now you’re all depressed.”

“I’m not depressed,” I defend myself. “Just nervous. I’m not sure what this means for my whole acting career. I don’t like knowing that I have no control over it.”

Sebastian wraps an arm around my shoulders as we enter the elevator. “Not to worry, I’m sure the PR team is on it. Stacey is good with these kinds of things. Trust me, I’ve put her through enough near disasters that this will be a piece of cake.”

Sebastian and I share managers, PR reps, and many more things. We’re strange friends, thrown together through a series of random events, but I’m so grateful for him. I would be so lost without all the resources he’s provided me with. 

I give a dry laugh, slumping against my friend as the thought of being so close to a bed only serves to make me more tired. “She’s probably glad that it’s not you for a change.”

“Yeah, probably.”Sebastian bids me goodnight, heading down to his room on the other end of the hall. I can hear our director and a couple of the producers talking, but it’s too muffled to make out much more than their voices. I’m too tired anyways, so I opt to head straight to my room and get into bed before anyone can ask me any questions. I barely make it into my pajamas before I hit the mattress, sighing as I sink into the covers. 

“Ah, finally. Goodnight world,” I mumble, turning to flip my phone on silent. The moment I go to grab my phone, it lights up with a notification. Groaning, I pick it up, squinting at the light. 

“He...he what now?”

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What do you guys think Yoongi did?? 

Fumbling hands push against the window until I manage to find the latch, a near-silent whimper escaping me as the cool London air floods the stuffy room. It doesn’t take long until I’m down on the floor, arms and legs pulled into my core head buried along with the rest of my mental capacity. 

I can’t decide which is worse. Closing my eyes and falling into that black abyss, or rocketing back up to the window, drinking in the air even as my eyes take in the city before me, reminding me of just how small and helpless I am.  

Everything, everything I have become and worked for scooped up in the palm of some man I’ve never met. There I am, right there. Falling from his hands like sand and he doesn’t even realize all that he’s holding.

The only hope I have left is that Min Yoongi has decided to create a castle with the remnants of me in his hands, and isn’t planning to wreck my tiny fortress with a well-timed stomp of his foot like some child on a playground. He must know, right? That while this may seem like some sort of trivial recess drama, it could end me? He will survive, because he’s loved the world over.

The world doesn’t know me well enough yet to even ascertain whether or not it loves me, but depending on what this stranger says about me will surely make up the world’s mind.

Like coming out of a deep sleep I begin to hear the constant vibrations of my phone on my bed. Someone is trying to call me. I don’t want to answer.

Moreover, I’m not sure I can answer. 

Eventually the sounds fade out again. Laying there on the ground before the window, I stare up at the ceiling. Naturally my eyes drift to the smoke detector, its small blue light holding me hostage even as I cling to that unspoken beacon of reality. It’s something so starkly normal; so completely common that I find my airways begin to open up bit by bit.

 The world is still spinning. 

I am still breathing.

The sun will rise. 

And Min Yoongi will have hell to pay.

🌙

What started as a gentle tap against my door quickly turns into an attempted breakin from the sounds of it. I jump up, forgetting where I am for a moment before I finally settle back down with a groan. 

I would personally not recommend the Waldorf to anyone purely based on the quality of their floors on my back.  

“Who is it?” I manage to croak out. The state of my throat serves as a reminder of my panic attack the night before. I wince, flipping around onto my stomach so I can stretch. 

“It’s Sebastian you ungrateful little weirdo, now open up this door before I-”

 I yank the door open, coming face to face with a red in the face Sebastian Stan. If I wasn’t currently fearing for my life I would have chuckled at the picture before me: Sebastian raging while doing his best to not crush the muffin he extends to me. He isn’t completely successful; there are imprints of his fingers on the base of my muffin, but I don’t mention it. 

“Did you just call me an ‘ungrateful little weirdo’? T-that’s not very nice.” I curse myself for my stutter, but I can’t help it as the weight that dragged me down last night comes crashing into me all over again. 

Sebastian closes the door behind him, looking around my hotel room like a bloodhound on a hunt. He lets out a triumphant shout when he comes across what he was looking for.

“This is quite the contraption. It allows people to communicate with you. All you have to do is press accept and then they can talk to you at all hours of the day and night.” Snatching my phone up from where I left it abandoned on the bed he hoists it up in the air. “Did you seriously ignore my calls all night? And everyone else’s?” 

He takes a look at my lock screen, eyebrows furrowing when he sees that I haven’t even opened my phone since the night before. Slowly, he takes in the bed which is only a little wrinkled from where I laid on it. I hadn’t even had time to get beneath the covers before I shot out of my bed like a bolt of lightning. I can see the gears shifting in Sebastian’s head. It’s clear that I didn’t sleep in my bed last night. But if I didn’t sleep there then... 

“Did you go somewhere last night?” His voice is quiet now, although I find that I prefer the yelling than I do the quiet. 

“No.”

“No? Then why is your bed still made?” He looks at me, but I make myself busy by shoving the muffin into my mouth. I know my face probably is red and blotchy from the stress tears I shed the night before. Setting the muffin down on the table, I make my way to the bathroom. Maybe if I can wash my face, he won’t notice. 

Sebastian follows me wordlessly. Quickly I reach for some facial scrub, turning the faucet on. 

Sebastian turns it off. I glare, but remain with my eyes downward. I turn it back on. 

He turns it off. 

“This is fun,” I growl out, going to turn the faucet back on but finding his hand planted firmly atop it. “But I don’t quite get the point of this game.” 

“Look at me.”

Sometimes, I really hate the fact that Sebastian has gotten to know me so well. I blame the crew of “Young Rising”, they were the ones who decided to cart us off to the middle of nowhere with no one to talk to except for each other and a few other actors or crew members that popped in and out.

 Sebastian’s tone has lost its edge when he speaks again, and I can tell that he’s starting to regret his temper tantrum from earlier. “Cara, look at me.”

Too exhausted to play this little game any further, I raise my head. I stare at my reflection in the mirror, eyes still red and puffy, dried tear-tracks sticking to my cheeks. I look like a complete mess. 

When I deem enough time has passed I reach for the faucet and throw it on, ripping open my facial bar. Sebastian stands there silent, connecting the dots. 

“Happy?” I bite out, eyes shut tight against the suds. My friend doesn’t say anything. When I finally finish up, he hands me a towel. 

Peaking my eyes open I find my friend leaning up against the counter with a faraway look in his eyes. When he notices my stare he comes back to life, silently opening his arms. I finish drying my face before tossing the towel aside and inching forward until Sebastian pulls me into his embrace. 

There’s a part of me that thinks that now would probably be a good time to cry again, but I can’t find the tears. Instead I just rest my head against his chest, feeling like a crumbling husk. 

“I didn’t realize, Car. That was uncalled for, my anger. I shouldn’t have called you, I- I should have just come over here-”

I shush him before he can get too far in his head. “Don’t worry about it,” I mumble against his chest.

“But, wait.” He moves so he can see my face. “Where did you sleep?”

I bite my lip, ignoring the way his eyes drift down to watch the action with more focus than required. “I’ll tell you one thing: these floors suck.”

Sebastian’s rolling laugh manages to bring a small smile to my face, although it serves as the final nail in my coffin when it suddenly stops, something dawning on his face.

“Oh yeah, Rhea wants to meet with us. Hurry and get ready.” I nod, already sure that our director will no doubt want to discuss the current situation. It doesn’t take long for me to throw some decent clothes on, Sebastian waiting outside my room. 

“Ready?” He asks, significantly more chipper than just a few minutes ago. 

“Yeah, ready.” Sebastian looks me over, smirking. “What?”

“You don’t have your phone, do you?” 

I groan, heading back inside as Sebastian chuckles. “Do I really need it?” I already know the answer, though. Wincing as I assess the damage, that being twenty-six missed calls from several different people and double the amount of texts, I head back out. 

“Ok, now let’s go.”

🌙

The small conference room on the second floor of the Waldorf is already filled to the brim with noise by the time I enter, Sebastian close behind me. All it takes is one look at me and the worried expression I masked a heartbeat too late for it to die down. 

“How are you doing, sweetie?” Rhea, the director and evil genius behind “Young Rising” comes up to me and gives me a warm smile. I nod, trying my best to return the smile but failing greatly in the “warmth” division.

Sebastian pulls out a seat, plopping down beside me once I’ve taken my seat. The room is still too quiet, a stark construct in comparison with previous meetings where the volume level was at a near constant high. 

“Alright everyone, let’s get started!” Rhea takes the lead, looking down at one of her many binders. “We’ve successfully finished shooting ‘Young Rising’, and now we are on to the next stage. Promotions.”

A groan goes around the table, the veterans in show business knowing full well what a nightmare that can be. I remain silent, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Everyone here clearly knows what’s going on, right?

“Sebastian and Cara did a great job on the ‘Graham Norton Show’ last night, let’s give them a hand.” A scattered round of applause echoes around the room, pink blooming on my cheeks. “Last we checked, which was about fifteen minutes ago, one of your clips from the show on Youtube has already reached four million views. People are curious to know who you guys are.”

I look up at Rhea to see her already smiling at me. We both know why people are curious. 

“Which clip was it?” Sebastian asks. I refrain from punching him. Rhea sighs, looking down at her notes. 

“It was the clip where Cara was informed of her new fan.” People chuckle in the room even as I sink further down into my seat. “That’s mainly what I wanted to talk about in this meeting today. Stephen is going to talk to us a bit more about how we should handle promotions moving forward with this newfound knowledge and the possible advantages and disadvantages we’ll be facing.” 

Stephen stands up, fixing his glasses. “Right, so just like Rhea said, I think that we really need to focus on the advantages we’ve just been given. So first, shoutout to Cara for being so likeable.” If I wasn’t trying to disappear before, I definitely am now. Sebastian notices and flicks my elbow. I glare at him, sitting up again. “Now more people that originally wouldn’t have given ‘Young Rising’ the time of day are becoming interested in the film. What their intentions are is uncertain, but we do know that we can use this attention to explain from a higher platform why we think this film is worth seeing.”

Stephen chatters on, going on and on about different techniques we can use to steer interview questions away from our love lives and tie our answers into the film. At some point he passes out an outline, which I’m grateful for. There’s no way I’m going to remember this when it’s finished.

 “Now, we should address possible pitfalls as well as instructions for how we should carry ourselves during these promotions. Obviously, this is especially applicable for Cara and Sebastian.” Reaching below the table, Stephen comes up with a handful of envelopes of different shapes and sizes. “Just over the course of the past night, the hotel has delivered over twenty letters to us. They are almost all addressed to Cara. We haven’t read them, but I have a sneaking suspicion that they have something to do with Min Yoongi.” I can’t help but agree when I see one decked out with BTS themed stickers. 

“So what are we going to do about all of this?” Sebastian asks. 

“Well, there’s not a whole lot we can do except handle it with grace. People are unsure of whether or not they’re Cara’s fans now. That’s difficult to hear, but it’s true. They’re waiting to see how she reacts. While that’s entirely up to your discretion, I would advise you to talk with either me or your personal PR rep before showing your face on social media or in public. You need to be prepared for whatever comes your way. However, from a promotional standpoint, I’d say we should run with this. Use the people’s curiosity to drive them to the movie theater.”

I find myself nodding numbly along with the other people, mind finally quiet. It makes sense, and if we’re being honest, this really is a great opportunity. Yet, I can’t help but feel like nobody else sees this as I do. 

Like I’m looking at a door that either opens to another world or that just clanged shut and I’m on the wrong side, forever trapped. 

“I’m assuming you’ve heard the latest news, Cara?” Stephen shakes me from my thoughts, and I nod. Of course I have. It’s been all I can think about since that first notification popped up on my phone last night. 

“Yeah, are we actually going to do that?” Sebastian asks, a hint of disbelief in his voice.

“I see no reason not to. I think it would be worse to turn down the invitation. And Cara speaks the language, which is an added bonus. We just wanted to clear it with you two first, but we’ve already spoken with a few people from Seoul. They’re more than happy to accomodate us, if we do decide to extend our promotional route. What do you two think?”

If I close my eyes the tweet from last night is still there, glaring up at me. 

“‘Young Rising’ cast invited to film festival in Seoul - and BTS’ Suga already RSVPd”

You could hear a pin drop, it’s so quiet. Without opening my eyes I can already tell everyone is looking at me; awaiting my decision. I want to scream at them, tell them that I don’t know. I just wanted to act, I just wanted to be successful. And now that desire has twisted into some sick reality as I face the possibility that I will have to act through every social interaction for the foreseeable future. 

Taking a shaky breath I gather my thoughts, reminding myself that if all else fails I can just give Min Yoongi a piece of my mind and then move to the mountains for the rest of my life, far enough that nobody can ever find me. 

“I think we should go.”

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taglist is open! Lemme know! Also, these first few chapters are meant to set up who Cara is and what this entire crazy situation is. (I know that seems obvious but just if you’re wondering where the heck Yoongs is, I promise he’s coming.)