#stusbunker

Dean was gone when I woke up. Being in charge of the camp meant he had a lot of responsibilities.  Keeping everyone fed and safe from Croats was a full-time job.

We had both changed in the time we had been here. Dean was a much harder man than before the Apocalypse. This world had forced him to be. He looked like he bore the weight of the world on his shoulders. He rarely smiled anymore. I sometimes missed that cocky grin of his.

I owed my life to him. He had kept me alive and safe after the Croatoan virus had decimated the population, turning everyone into mindless zombies. I was barely keeping it together after losing Sam, and the endless struggle for survival wore me down. I felt like I had nothing left to live for so I was stupid and reckless, taking unnecessary chances, hoping a Croat would get me and end it all.

Once we returned to camp after a particularly stupid mistake, Dean yanked me out of the truck and practically dragged me to his cabin. As soon as the door was shut he whirled on me. “What the fuck was that? If Cass wasn’t there that Croat would have bitten you.  Then what??”

I shrugged.  Then this misery would be over and I would be free.

He got right in my face, his green eyes blazing with fury. “You don’t even care if you live or die anymore, do you. Y/N?”

I ducked my head, ashamed that he had figured out my secret. He grabbed my chin and yanked my face up, forcing my tear-filled eyes to meet his. “Well, I care. I can’t lose you too.”

And then he leaned down and kissed me until I was dizzy and proceeded to leave the cabin before my astonished brain had a chance to catch up.

The next night I was in his bed, and by the next week, I had moved into his cabin. I would never forget Sam, but it was time for me to move on. I worked hard and trained and became one of Dean’s best and most-trusted soldiers.

______________________

Everyone had been called together for an important meeting. After years of searching, Dean had finally found the Colt, the gun that could supposedly kill the devil. And he was ready to use it.  When he dumped it on the table we all stared at it in fascination.  It looked just like a regular gun.

“We have the Colt, and we know where the big man is going to be tomorrow,” Dean said grimly.

“And you’re sure that thing will kill him?” Risa said doubtfully. “And we just happen to know where he is?  Seems a little too convenient for me.”

He shot her an annoyed look. “The demon we got the info from was one of his inner circle. Believe me, he wasn’t lying.” 

Cass looked over at Risa. “Our fearless leader is all too skilled at the art of obtaining information.”

I didn’t like who Dean became when he tortured people for Intel.  I knew he was doing it for the right reason, but he scared me, so I stayed out of it.

He slapped his hand on the map that was spread out on the table.  “He is going to be right here.”

I looked at the map. “That’s right in the middle of a hot zone, Dean! It’s…..”

“Yep, it’s gonna be crawling with Croats.” he finished.

“It’s suicide,” Risa muttered, shaking her head.

“Look, people! We have the Colt, and we know where he is going to be, and when! We may never get another chance like this! We don’t have a choice!” he said harshly.

Everyone began talking at once, complaining and grumbling.

“Enough!” He said loudly, then he looked over at me. “Do you trust me, Y/N? Are you in?"

I held his gaze for a long moment before answering with a sigh. “I’m in.”

“Me too,” Cass commented. “I’ll attempt to rally the troops," he said over his shoulder as he walked from the room.

“Are you going to be okay with this?” Dean asked me after everyone had left.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” I responded before leaving him alone to plan the attack.

Later that evening, Dean tried to tell me he didn’t want me to go on this mission, that seeing Lucifer wasn’t good for me, but I assured him that I was fine and there was no way I was staying behind.

________________________

The street was as quiet as a tomb. Not a single Croat or demon engaged us as we slipped through the chain-link fence that separated the hot zone or as we ran up the street towards the abandoned sanitarium where Dean said Lucifer was.

We hid in some brush outside the building's perimeter while Dean told us the plan. He pointed to a second-floor window. “He’s up there. That’s where we go in. Locked and loaded everyone.” With looks of grim determination on their faces, they began to prepare.

I pulled him aside. "Dean, This doesn’t feel right. This street should be crawling with Croats, Where is everybody? It’s like they know we are coming. I think it’s a trap.”

“Keep your voice down!” he demanded.

I gestured towards the window. “If we go in that way, we’ll be sitting ducks.”

He ignored me. “Okay everyone, move out!”

The team took off running. As I prepared to leave, he grabbed my arm. “We aren’t going in that way. We’re going in the back.”

I stared at him incredulously. “You're using them as a diversion? Cass, Risa? You're sending them to their deaths!” I couldn’t believe Dean would do this to our friends.

“I promised them that I would kill the devil and save the world, and that’s what I am going to do.” He said firmly.

“Well then, let’s do it,” I said resolutely, holding up my gun. “Let’s make their deaths count for something.”

“Nope. I’m doing this on my own. Lucifer may be wearing Sam to the prom, but I don’t know what effect seeing you will have.  You need to stay here.”

“The hell I do!” I snapped indignantly. “I’m going and you can’t stop me!”

“I love you, Y/N,” Dean said sadly as his fist connected with my jaw and I fell to the ground in a heap.

____________________________

When I came to, I could hear shouting and lots of gunfire. My head was still spinning from Dean clocking me, but I grabbed my weapon and headed to the back of the building. The sight that greeted me stopped me in my tracks.

There was a beautiful rose garden behind the building. Since no one had been tending it, it had become overgrown and wild.  There stood Sam, dressed in white from head to toe. Except it wasn’t Sam.  I could tell by the way he carried himself.  Dean was on the ground, and Sam’s shiny white shoe was pressing on Dean’s neck.

“Sam, no!” I shouted as I ran over to them. “Let him go, Please!”

Lucifer looked faintly amused as he saw me, gun pointed at him. “Hello, Y/N,  I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“This wasn’t how it was supposed to be! She shouldn’t be here!” Dean bellowed angrily.

Lucifer cocked his head, considering me, his face giving nothing away. I dropped my gun on the ground and held my hands up. “Please, Sam. I know you’re still in there. Please let him go. For me. I’m begging you.”

Dean’s eyes met mine, and I could see the fury in them. “No, Y/N! Don’t do this!”

“Come closer,” Lucifer commanded. I inched closer.

“I know how much Sam loves you, how much he misses you. How much he longs for you still. I’ve seen all his memories.” Lucifer says conversationally.

“You bastard!” Dean snarls, and struggles, but Lucifer keeps him in place with just a small increase of pressure on his neck.

“Take me instead.”

“Both Lucifer and Dean look surprised. I repeat myself. “Take me and let Dean live.  I will go with you.”

“No!!!!” Dean cries out, an almost inhuman howl.

Lucifer holds out his hand to me. I hesitate. “Let me say goodbye to him first,” I say quietly.

He removes his foot from Dean’s neck, and Dean scrambles up towards me, pulling me into his arms.  “You are not doing this!” he says angrily.

I pull his head down and give him a passionate kiss, then I whisper in his ear. “I have to. You are the only one who can kill Lucifer, Dean. You can’t die.”

With a deep sigh, I pull away from him and take a step towards Lucifer. He smiles at me, and for a second, he looks just like my Sam. “ I love you, Dean,” I whisper turning back to him for one last look.

Lucifer gives Dean a triumphant smirk. “This is exactly how it is supposed to be, Dean. No matter what you do, no matter what choice you make, you always end up here, and she always ends up with me,” he says with a note of satisfaction.

“I love you Y/N,” Dean whispers, as Lucifer reaches out for my hand and we both vanish, and Dean falls to his knees, alone in the garden.