A new synesthetic color flash....

A literal golden streak

The manor house-the grounds-the cabin rooms-the event-the inspection-friends from school-trying to find a room

The texture was a lot smoother than the other ones that normally accompany flares, there also wasn't a flare in the last couple of days that meets the pattern I've been experiencing with the KP index being at 4 around an M-class flare (Yes, I know that pattern is weirdly specific)

So this does somewhat make sense

Also I have been actively avoiding online algorithmic patterns during my recovery to avoid over stimulation, so any content of the dream would be more related to my own daily life rather than anything out in the world

* * * * * * * * * * *

Online algorithms have their own textures to me, which might be why I can discern the similarities between some of them, I don't know how else to describe the feeling of how code moves when I'm interacting with it which I would attribute to Kinesthetic Synesthesia symptoms (it's the best description I can find that matches what I'm experiencing)

I have noticed differences in the types of movement between different online platforms using different types of code, although since the gas leak was repaired and my senses have calmed down I am becoming less sensitive to it

I'm currently procrastinating finishing my coding lesson, but I have found that when these pondering thought process occur I am better off leaving it to it's completion so it doesn't sit there recurring in the back of my mind

it's possibly why I never found meditation useful because to me it just seemed like people wanted to quiet the mind rather than allow it to perform it's natural analysis function and come to a reasonable conclusion (there's likely a touch of the hyper-focus-tism in that response having a "noisy brain", it simply works differently)

Anyway,..........(keep in mind these ponderings are the result of my own subjective experience)

The colour dot flashes seem to have stopped reproducing after I suggested to myself that they may not have a useful day to day function is they became too numerous. Everything has a useful threshold mathematically, and there's a point where these signal could also have become a dangerous distraction rather than possess a usefulness The total has come to 5; two are coloured blue and orange respectively on the left and right of my field of vision, the others are all white as well as being smaller but take up different positions, above and below, to indicate their meaning They still do occur regularly in respect to the context of the subject that I am contemplating

It gets me wondering about the self-directed aspect of some evolutionary traits

Given that this synesthetic development is a response to poison in my home environment (natural gas) and my subconcious creating a way to communicate with my conscious mind, it stands to reason it prioritised the blue (left) and orange (right) I would assign the white dots as less urgent and a direct support response to my recovery since However, due to its nature of being ingrained into my psychological responses, I do believe there would be the prospect of it responding to my choices, and therefore suggestions I make to myself This makes sense to me given that it's creation is an internal communication response designed to attempt to ensure safe communication between my subconcious and subconcious mind, I was able to observe my subconscious actually being in charge and could tell by it's intentions it was attempting to continue useful function, but things would occur out of order with my subconcious being far ahead and there clearly being a delay in the conscious follow up Sort of like having a bunch of invisible servants setting things up for you before you do something but never seeing them actually do it, (makes you wonder about some of those types of fairy stories doesn't it?) but I was also able to recall the act of having done so and would have to wait until it became more apparent as to why I had done it

The human subconcious is doing far more calculating than any person could possibly be aware of

Technically speaking, I have been able to observe the development of a new individual evolutionary trait that the human brain is capable of producing due to my unique genes, and environmental factors, which is pretty fucking neat really

Now this trait will not be passed onto anyone, due to the fact that I will not be having anymore children due to my individual circumstances and lack of a supportive partner

So this unique evolutionary trait begins and ends with me

(For reference: Spatial sequence, Personality/colour, Personailty/smell, vision/smell, sound/taste, kinesthetic, Sound/texture, I'm not sure what to label the colour dots as but perhaps....Psych/colour? Likely there are also aspects of AuDHD able to be applied but it may also be the result of the sensory overlaps from Synesthesia. Makes me ponder whether the entire spectrum would be able to be relabelled as aspects of Synesthesia?)

It makes me wonder how many of these types of traits have developed only to be extinguished by these types of circumstances?

And also the element of the fact that my own conclusion to the usefulness of this trait is what either reinforced it or caused it to cease developing further?

How much of our evolution is actually a self-directed response to our individual choices?

You have to acknowledge the likelihood that most of these people had some flavour of neuro-spicy

But they were talking about Ramanujan.......that man had Synesthesia

Apparently to him numbers had personalities, given his penchant for numbers and mathematics I would imagine he may have also had spatial sequence as it's common for synesthetes to have more than one flavour in their sundae

Apparently some things would come to him in dreams from a Goddess.....this is of course based around the subjective experience of his belief system growing up in Hinduism

But a lot of what they described about his experiences was VERY familiar to me, and I will admit I had a moment in the garden with Darwin

My focus as a child was not numbers like him, it was words and shapes

Free will lies somewhere between randomness and determinism which seem to be at the opposite extremes in reality. It's clear that neither pure randomness or pure determinism would leave any room for free will. If the world is completely random, then by definition we have no control over what will happen, and if the world is completely deterministic, we also similarly have no control over what will happen as it would all be prescripted. So you are stuck between a rock and a hard place.

But are randomness and determinism actually opposite extremes when it comes to defining reality? Are they mutually exclusive, Meaning that they cannot both exist within the same framework? Our latest model of Physics, Quantum theory, suggests that there is a way of combining the two. Every quantum event is fundamentally random, yet we find that large objects behave deterministically. How can this be?

The answer is that sometimes when we combine many random things, a more predictable outcome can emerge. This may seem paradoxical at first (shouldn't lots of random things give you something even more random?) But this is not necessarily the case."

'Decoding Reality: The Universe as Quantum Information'

- Vladko Vedral

This is the thing that my pattern seeking brain does. It surveys and analyzes a whole bunch of information, some of it seemingly unrelated, but due to the nature of algorithms the topics I encounter are usually interlinked in some way.

If I am using a particular social media account that is trained towards specific algorithmic information, I am more likely able to be able to make some type of prediction about events yet to come.

The thing is, I'm not always completely conscious of this process, which can make Algorithmic based social media sites a little hazardous. You also have to keep in mind that these sites are specifically designed to do precisely this with much of the safety advice ignored by people seeking to sell you an idea

Here is a contextual example of a set of seemingly random events coalescing in an unpredicted outcome.:

The entire purpose of trying to control the information that feeds these types of algorithms, is an attempt to sway the outcome, especially if the process has been automated and is using things like AI chatbots and AI generated articles, based on both the information that is fed to the audience and also generated from their reaction

If you are unable to control the information being fed to the audience, and unable to control the reaction, your endeavor will be unsuccessful

It gets slightly worse when the audience becomes aware of the manipulation

Using things like fandoms as test markets for this type of automated lazy media management is unwise.but it would also explain why certain companies who invested heavily in these types of technologies, and then lost a significant sum of money from having done so because of its failure, would be so invested in making sure that it worked

I did also figure out how to make it blank to shut it up using a memorised visual image as a mental trigger hack because it can get noisy

How normal is it for people to be able to listen to full songs in their heads like there's a radio playing in the background and they're doing other things?

While I've been scrolling Pinterest I've been 'listening' to Guns n' Roses in my head while also planning my grocery shopping list and doing my budget

I can also switch songs like a playlist on my phone

When people talk about multitasking, does this also count?

When its a bunch of different things being managed at the same time inside your head as opposed to doing multiple things at once like if you were cooking a meal and your monitoring different parts of the meal to serve together?

Are there any other Synesthetes or Neurodivergents that do this?