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𓆩⟡𓆪 His sassyness popped up and I found a need to do a headcanon of him.
Summary: Safe and NSFW Headcannons.
TW// NSFW Themes.
𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫: 𝐄𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝐙𝐮𝐫𝐠
“If you want something turned evil, turn it evil yourself. That's what Nana Zurg always used to say to me, and she was plenty evil.” - Evil Emperor Zurg.
𝐑𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜/𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜:
Oh, this rouge monarch of evil. So full of spite for that Buzz Lightyear, but for you? He can allow such accommodations. If nought to put the blame on you with his own failures, but also doesn’t throw you out the nearest window… So, you’re doing better than being his Grubs and Brain Pods. You even get your own room! Though, it’s stuck on Planet Z. He’s not trusting of you just yet, and to have you close might prove your loyalty… Among other things.
I believe he would get into sass battles with you, but he has to win. You won once with him and he was… impressed, but didn’t want to ruin his own ego and shooed you away with his ever demanding, sassed self. (Locked you away in time-out.) Yet he will recall on the moment as if amused before making improvements to be ready for another sass battle.
Dark Humor can get his evil mind going. You say something out of pocket? Grumbling under your breath about how if one person donates an organ? People love you. You donate more than 5? Suddenly Star Command is upon you. Safe to say he was amused with your way of thinking, but now he’s dangerously curious… Perhaps you might get a peculiar praise outta that one.
I can see him liking someone to talk to that’s not his minions or a robot. He likes to explain in detail (gruesome or not) what he plans to do but also leaves a sum out of the plan to keep you questioning. Sometimes, I think he doesn’t even realize it and that’s how he’s been… thwarted over a thousand times by Lightyear. Other than that? He’s rather… charming with his mental creations he speaks rather highly of. I mean, they are his ideas. Why shouldn’t he? Loner lol.
He may like talking but he doesn’t like touching. No touchy! Do not touch your Emperor unless he says to do so! He will cut off a hand or many to keep his image up, but it’s not all for his evil reputation. It is generally that he doesn’t like to be touched… or at least isn’t used to it. So it is very wise to ask first before approaching.
Back to blaming, he will find a way to blame you for his failures. A bit of a red flag but at least you’re not his Grubs. You get treated better than them by an extent. After all? He is an “Equal opportunist.” You won’t get to slide under his radar to easily.
Speaking of radar? Once you have his attention? You’re stuck on that radar, never to leave it. An obsession some say, others say for security as he does the same with Buzz. Though, he isn’t a creep about it. Never really following in on every single move you make. He gave you enough trust to be by his side… He can reward you with this freedom… Still stuck on Planet Z or any other planet he has conquered though.
Will conquer your world just because you’re sided with him. Have any family? They get a loosened leash but they are still working for him now. No higher or equal rank to you. They gotta earn it. This can also be combined with the way he likes to watch them struggle and adapt. It just hits his scientific, evil nerves just right.
If you’re truly someone loyal to him? You get to be close to him as long as he wishes. You get more… privileges and freedom by another extent. It’s honestly not easy to gain his trust, but if you did? Be rather proud of yourself. It’s not an easy feat, and it may seem like it, but remember. He’s good a being evil: manipulative, scheming… etc.
More an his obsessive side? I can definitely see him being so with how much he talks about Lightyear or a kin to. Or perhaps how he’s gets angry if someone compares or even talks about the accursed Buzz Lightyear. So, if you earned his friendship/interest? He will defend you, but probably not to an obsessive extent. Unless you’re his mate/spouse/lover.
𝐒𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥/𝐒𝐦𝐮𝐭:
Alright, NSFW time. I can see him displaying his power as if it’s some mating call to you. “Oh Darling!~ Come and see what I did to this ugly plant!” Cut to you who gets to see it in 3D and him obliterate a planet through the safety of his ship. He actually multitasked on this one. He didn’t like this planet, and he gets to sway you with his evilness? Very proud Emperor Zurg! That is if you accepted the invitation to mating…
Oooo, you could try and sway him and praise him, (and he’s melting on the inside) but he’s rather a tough one to crack; especially in public. He’ll keep you close in public and stay stoic for his reputation, but as soon as those doors close to privacy? Consider him yours to take or his to take. He doesn’t mind being a switch.
Switch, he’s a switch. He likes to top. To see how good only he can make you feel, and to breed properly. For being a bottom? He likes to watch you struggle to take him. To grasp your hands as you go up and down on him, and to observe your nude beauty. Can be a little shit when bottom though, and hold you in place to watch you loose your strength to take more of him before rolling over and taking you just how you like it.
Evil thing, as always. Always has a trick up his sleeve even in heated times. He doesn’t need toys and doesn’t like not touching you. Ironic, no? Anyways, no toys. He will do just enough to have you craving him. A bit manipulative with your body language as he does what he pleases to his mate/spouse/lover.
He gets jealous when he doesn’t have your attention, sees someone flirting with what is his, and somehow when you’re away from him too long. Though, you maybe doing that on purpose to grind his gears, but he actually likes the play. Likes it when you give him the attention immediately when he comes close to shield you from many preying eyes. (Ones that he was laser out of their skulls later.) He finds it rather thrilling, but he also likes how you melt underneath him when he takes you. Whispering filthy nothings into your ears.
He can be such a flirt, and get down a dirty. He is not ashamed of it. Especially in public, but do just be careful of what you choose to say back. Don’t want him to get flustered now, don’t we? We don’t wanna somehow end up in his nest/bed with you on top/bottom, hmm?
Thrills himself on the thought on having a heir. It’s to continue his legacy! His rein of power! So, don’t be too surprised if he just snatches you up and keeps you in his chambers for a couple of weeks. When you are seen afterwards? You’re a mess! But hey, you’re well fed and you slept soundlessly. So win for you?
For some reason, he gives me bug vibes. Don’t question me on it. I don’t know, but he do. But? Pheromones. He uses that hidden scent of his to pull you consciously in by your own will. It greatly amuses him when you snuggle up to him like he didn’t just lead you into his clutches when he plans to take you into his chambers that is full of his scent, making you a little woozy and keen into him with a small whimper.
More bug thoughts. If he does oviposition? You’re in for a surprise because he won’t tell you about it. One: he doesn’t think much of it, and two? He’s evil, remember? He likes watching you struggle to take him and his clutch. Though, for regular? He still like to watch you struggle with his size, but he does live for the moments where you grasp at him, pulling him close as if he’s your lifeline.
Can be quite vanilla, but there are some kinks he absolutely doesn’t mind like: shower/bath sex, marking, fighting/training before sexin it out, overstimulation, worship, mating hunts… etc. He’s rather open to figure out new kinks as well! Don’t be shy when taking what you want from him. He’ll gladly provide it, he’s gotta be a good mate, no?
MIGHT AS WELL POST THIS TOO (This did numbers in insta :D
for my few buzzwarp lovers out there
(Also notice the sparkle in their eyes fade MWEHEEHEHEHE
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Quotable Disney Round 2 Group A Bracket 1 Poll 1/8
***Please vote on the content of the quote not the format of the picture***
Which quote is more memorable?
"Dishonor! Dishonor on your whole family!..."
"Target the planet of widows and orphans!"
Voting ended onJan 24, 2025
Mushu:
It's just so quotable and funny. One of the best line delivery's in the movie. It's a classic that can be used in so many different situations to show your disappointment My siblings and I quote it at each other constantly! It's very fun!
Emperor Zurg:
the delivery, followed by Buzz's "YOU FIEND" is peak comedy to me, and my brother and I still quote it to emphasoze any time a villain in a show is being over-the-top capital-E Evil
All Our Polls
Full Quotes Below:
"Dishonor! Dishonor on your whole family! Make note of this. Dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow,"
~Mushu, Mulan (1998)
"Target the planet of widows and orphans"
~Emperor Zurg, Buzz Lightyear of Star Command: The Adventure Begins (2000) [which also serves as the first 3 pilot episodes of the show]