#ssm15d22

“Morning Sasuke-kun!” Sakura greeted him cheerfully. She was stirring a boiling bowl of something that smelled delicious while a kettle whistled merrily in the background. Her smile faded as she took in the wild panic in his eyes and Kusanagi in his grasp. “What’s wrong?”

The foreign chakra moved closer as Sakura did, and, reluctantly, Sasuke deactivated his sharingan. A delicate hand brushed away the sheen of sweat that had appeared on his brow while she stared up at him worriedly. Although he was still feeling uneasy, the sense of an imminent threat had passed, and he forced himself to take a calming breath. For her sake.

“No, I just—I thought I sensed foreign chakra heading this way,” Sasuke explained, cupping the hand on his face with his own. “Sorry for worrying you, it was probably nothing.”

“Oh!” The worried furrow disappeared from between her brows and her sunny smile returned. “Probably just a faraway ninja who flickered within your sensing range for a second.”

“Probably,” he agreed. He forced a half-smile onto his face so as not to worry her.

Except it wasn’t an errant ninja. He did sense a close, foreign chakra; he still sensed the foreign chakra. It was in this campground, and it was somehow attached to Sakura.

Why? Why was it different? Had she eaten something? Had she gotten sick? Had someone poisoned her? Sasuke sat down and continued to run through possible explanations as Sakura served him some of the porridge she’d been cooking.

When Sakura leaned down to give him a bowl and cup of green tea, the answer hit with so fast—and so hard—that he nearly dropped his bowl.

Sakura was pregnant.

The chakra wasn’t a flicker because someone was suppressing it; it was a clicker because that’s all it was—a flicker. A tiny flicker of a human being only barely coming into existence. In hindsight, it seemed so obvious. Even though he’d never encountered the chakra before, he felt familiar with it. There was the tight control that Sakura possessed, and there was his overwhelming reservoir of strength.

Their child would be a force to reckon with, Sasuke could already tell.

Their child.

Numbly, Sasuke shoveled spoonful after spoonful of porridge into his mouth. They were going to have a child. He nearly choked and coughed several times before he could swallow it correctly. Sakura had chosen to sit on the log across the campfire—whether because she could tell he needed space or the log had just looked comfortable, Sasuke couldn’t tell—and sent him several worried glances as she ate her own breakfast.

How can she be so carefree and collected when we’re having a baby? Sasuke wondered, forcing down the last remnants of the porridge with a swig of tea. The porridge was having no problems down her throat—she was on her second bowl. And she was still humming and smiling! How long had she known?

Did she even know?

Sasuke’s spoon froze on his way to his mouth. That had to be it. The little spark of chakra was so tiny and new, Sakura probably hadn’t even had time to notice it. It was too early for her body to be showing any of the signs that might have tipped her off—morning sickness, for example. Hints like sore breasts could be explained away by other…common activities.

Should he tell her?

Unaware of Sasuke’s piercing gaze on her, Sakura began to clean up the campground. Sunlight filtered through the trees and illuminated her petal pink hair in a soft glow. Her expression was tranquil, peaceful in a way Sasuke still had a hard time believing was linked to his presence. But for the better part of a year—for the better part of his life, really—she’d been assuring him it did.

Watching how calm and happy Sakura was took the edge off his panic and allowed him to focus more clearly. He took a deep breath, gathered his breakfast dishes, and joined Sakura in packing up. Her mint green eyes flickered across his face and posture as he approached her, searching for signs that he had conquered whatever was plaguing him. Apparently finding what she was looking for, she beamed up at him as he took up his place at his side.

It was ridiculous to think that her happiness was so linked with his.

But he kissed her forehead nonetheless.

---x---

As they neared their lodgings for the next couple of days, Sasuke began to feel decidedly more agitated. He had made peace with the fact that they were expecting a baby. Perhaps peace wasn’t the best description. Sasuke’s muscles tensed as if prepping to run every time he thought about his family growing, but his chest and limbs felt lighter at the same time. When Sakura smiled at him, which was often, Sasuke couldn’t answer with anything but a full grin—even his trademark half-smirk felt out of place.

He was excited. Excited for the baby. Excited to have a family. Excited to start a new life with Sakura.

But he was not looking forward to telling her.

For a while, Sasuke actually contemplated letting her find out on her own. She was a capable medic, after all. It probably wouldn’t take too long—a week at most.

It took half a day for Sasuke to decide that wouldn’t be possible. As they walked to the village, Sakrua chattered beside him. About the weather. About the village they were going to. About their friends back home. About the medicinal herbs that grew in the area.

But not about their baby.

Which, Sasuke discovered, was what he really wanted to be talking about.

Would they raise their child as a ninja? Did Sakura want to have the baby in Konoha or did she want to keep journeying? When did she want to go back to Konoha?—before the birth or immediately after? Or a couple years after? Did she think the child should take her name instead of his?

His mind was buzzing with about a thousand questions, and Sasuke decided he couldn’t go through this alone for much longer. It was a testament to his character growth, really.

Still, it brought back the problem of how he was going to tell her.

“Are you okay, Sasuke-kun?” Sakura finally inquired. They had just paid for their room and were putting away their supplies. “You’re acting a little—faraway. Is something on your mind?”

The fact that she asked meant she was worried and had been worried for a while now. In the past it would not have been unheard of for Sasuke to lock himself up in his mind and brood over whatever was bothering him. Things were better these days, and Sasuke talked his problems over with Sakura more often than not. If he did start to brood, Sakura had no issue giving him some space to work it out. After all, her patience seemed to be infinite when it came to him,

When the mood continued, however, Sakura had taken to asking if he was okay. Her inquisition both alerted him to the fact that he was brooding and gave him a couple of options. He could either use her question as a starting place for a conversation, or he could decide to take a little more time to think over it by himself.

This time Sasuke chose the latter option.

“I just need to take a walk and clear my head,” Sasuke declared, grabbing his bag. As this journey was still partially dedicated to his path to redemption, such a conclusion was not odd. “You should take a bath and relax. I’ll be back in time for dinner.”

“I’m not going to turn that offer down,” Sakura agreed, stretching languorously out on their bed. It wasn’t much. The sheets were worn but clean, and the pillows seemed flat. Still, anything was luxurious compared to a camping roll. “We should go out to eat though. I hear this place has great sukiyaki.”

“Deal.” It would be a perfect time to tell her.

Now, he just had to figure out how.

---x---

There’s was only a half an hour until Sakura expected him for dinner, and Sasuke was nowhere near prepared.

He had quickly decided simply telling her was not an option. Sasuke didn’t trust himself to stumble over the words. Generally, Sasuke was decent at articulating his thoughts. The moment he entered an emotional situation, though, all bets were off. That lesson had been adequately learned after his proposal. Sasuke winced at the memory.

So, this time, Sasuke wanted to do it right. It definitely needed to be romantic, and maybe a little bit creative.

How did women do this?

After wandering around the village for hours in hopes that something might pique his interest, Sasuke walked into the local bookstore for ideas. The pregnancy section did advertise creative ways to tell your husband the good news, but no matter how hard he looked, he couldn’t instructions for a husband looking to inform his wife.

He supposed his situation was slightly unusual, but he had thought more shinobi would be able to sense the difference in their wives’ chakra. Apparently not.

Eventually, Sasuke purchased several medical texts on pregnancy and the interaction of pregnancy and chakra. The clerk had wrapped each book in shiny, white paper and sent him off with a heart “Congratulations!” Sasuke had smiled and nodded, but the dissatisfaction with his gift persisted.

As a medic, Sakura would definitely enjoy her gifts. Yet, something about presenting his wife with books to tell her she was pregnant felt—clinical. Detached.

With fifteen minutes until dinner, however, Sasuke was out of options. The books weighed heavily on Sasuke as he reluctantly walked towards their inn. Well, it was still going to be better than his choppy proposal. Although Sakura insisted to this day that it was sweet, absolutely nothing had gone according to his plan.

Just before Sasuke rounded the corner to their inn, something caught his eye in the window of the shop he was passing.

Tiny shoes off all varieties were lined up behind the glass. Miniature running shoes, sparkly shoes, dress shoes, sandals—they were all there. But, right in the center, was the pair that had caught his eye.

They were pale pink, a couple shades lighter than Sakura’s hair, and reminded Sasuke of a ballet flat. A strap ending in a buckle secured the shoe in place just after the ankle. The black buckle matched the black sole of the tiny shoe, making the only two items on the shoe that weren’t pink. What sealed the deal, though, were the miniscule flowers decorating the top of the shoe. They didn’t represent any real type of flowers. They were a simple five petal flower attached to the shoe by a darker pink gemstone.

Innocent and cute.

Suddenly, Sasuke knew exactly how he wanted to tell Sakura the news.

---x---

As it turned out, the restaurant with the best sukiyaki was extremely formal. His wife had done both her research and her shopping, however, and Sasuke was greeted with a new, black umanori hakama and white kimono laying out on their bed. The kataginu had been neglected, for which he was thankful. The evening was shaping up to warm one.

The bathroom door opened, and a faint floral scent floated out of it. A silver hairclip was in Sakura’s mouth and her hands were up in her hair as Sakura peaked out the doorway. The clip made speech impossible, but the grin behind it said “welcome home” just as clearly.

Obviously, Sakura was nearly ready. Rose eyeshadow served to highlight her eyes and a light blush and cerise lipstick had been applied. Sakura had already donned her white kimono; it went well with her new grey and on hakama with raspberry silhouettes of flowers decorating the bottom. Seeing the designs, Sasuke couldn’t help but grin as he thought of the small shoes he had wrapped in his bag.

“Welcome back, Anata,” Sakura greeted him once she had swept her hair up with the pin, “I got you some clothes to wear to The Charming Dragon.”

“I didn’t realize it was going to be a formal occasion,” Sasuke commented, examining the silk hakama with the pads of his fingers. Sakura had put a lot of time and effort into picking out this effort. Concealing his gift was going to be difficult, now, though. The ensemble didn’t have pockets, and he had a feeling that his worn, over-the-shoulder bag wasn’t going to be welcome at The Charming Dragon.

“Neither did I, but I walked by the restaurant when I was exploring the town, and I’ve really been craving sukiyaki lately so I didn’t want to leave without trying some,” Sakura explained with a shrug.

Still pondering where to hide his gift—secured in his sleeve somehow?—Sasuke flinched at Sakura’s oblivious demonstration of another sign of her pregnancy. Would it be better just to give it to her now?

“I was going to give this to you at dinner,” Sasuke began, digging in his bag for the shoes, “But I think it would be uncomfortable trying to smuggle it in in these clothes.”

One of Sakura’s eyebrows arched in confusion as she accepted the small, silver bag Sasuke presented her with. He waited patiently as she removed the white tissue paper, and reached into the bag to retrieve her gift. Even though he was the one who had bought the gift, which meant he knew what it was, he was equally excited for Sakura to finish unwrapping her present.

She froze once the shoes had risen far enough out of the bag for her to make out what they were. The small flowers were still partially obscured by the bag, but Sakura seemed to understand the significance of the gift immediately. Slowly and carefully, as if she might damage them by moving them too fast, Sakura withdrew the shoes completely and examined them by the lamp. Awe shining in her eyes, Sakura looked up to Sasuke for conformation.

“Congratulations.”

He had a hard time choking out the word, which made him extremely thankful he hadn’t planned out a speech to go with this moment.

With a gleeful laugh, Sakura ran and threw herself into his arms. He caught her easily, and buried his head in her hair. Sasuke wanted to memorize this moment and cherish it forever. Sakura’s almost-too-tight hold on his neck, the smoothness of Sakura’s silk hakama against his arm, his unsteady breath, the tears threatening to spill down his cheeks—all of it. He never wanted it to end.

As always, it was over too soon.

Sakura wiggled from his tight hold, and placed the shoes in his hand with a quick order to “hold this” before disappearing into the bathroom once more. He could hear her rummaging around, and it wasn’t long before she returned with a navy blue box in her grasp.

“Trade,” she declared, taking back the pink little shoes and replacing them with her own gift.

Quirking his eyebrow much like she had done, Sasuke flicked open the corners of the neatly wrapped present with his thumb and parted the wrapping until the box beneath it was visible. From there it was easy to open the cardboard clasp, and Sasuke’s breath faltered as the cardboard flaps parted to reveal his gift.

Tiny, navy blue ninja sandals—much like the ones he had word as a genin—rested at the bottom of the box.

Sasuke didn’t say anything, just held the tiny shoes and marveled at the way they barely covered the length of his fingers. He might have been content to hold them all night had Sakura not thrown herself at him once more. It seemed another hug was in order.

“So how long have you known?” Sakura asked, finally peaking up from his chest. Her forehead hit his chin, and he readjusted so his nose pressed against his forehead.

“This morning,” he rumbled against her hair, “You?”

“Just this afternoon.”

Only a couple of hours difference, then. Sasuke grinned against her forehead, enjoying the feeling of success—he had known first.

“We might have to save your pink shoes for the next baby, though, Sasuke-kun,” Sakura teased from under his arm, “I have a feeling about this one.”

“Perhaps,” Sasuke allowed with a shrug. He didn’t think so, though. Something about the way those pink little shoes had stuck out to him in the window told him he was right.

His heart tumbles at the words.

“I... I never thought I'd be capable of such thing,” she continues, lying her head back down on the pillow. “I used to think about having children when I was a little girl. You know, when I played with dolls and all. It's every girl's dream – but it's not every kunoichi's dream. When I became a genin and we had our first missions – that's when I began to truly realize what being a shinobi was. I realized that, being a shinobi, I could not aspire to normal things, such as becoming a mother one day.”

Sasuke remains silent, but he is thinking that he was vey similar to her in that aspect. He never thought he would become a father, mainly because he never thought he would live long enough. Maybe all shinobi are like that. At a young age, they realize they are nothing but weapons – trained to face death, to use death. Their lives are so fragile; they can die at any moment. They do not have enough hope to see having a family as nothing but a wild dream.

“At seventeen,” Sakura says, “I had already been so close to death. I was willing to be that close to death. I didn't think about the distant future anymore. Even though I was in love with you, and wanted to be with you, and wanted to be your family, Sasuke-kun... I just never really thought I would have children. Perhaps I didn't find myself fit nor worthy for it. I don't know why.”

He knows why. She saw her hands stained in her enemies' blood, like he did. How could a murderer create something as small, pure, and harmless as a baby? That's what he's been wondering ever since she told him those three words, nine months ago.

“Yet,” she murmurs, her smile growing and a tear sliding down her cheek, “here I am; here she is.”

He looks down at Sarada. She is already so wonderful, even if she's only been alive for a few hours. He touches the fine hairs on top of her head. He touches her small nose and her eyelashes. He touches her chubby cheeks and her soft ears. He touches the pink onesie she is wearing. He touches her tiny fingers – five in each hand. She is so, so, so small... so vulnerable... so completely his... so loved.

She is his daughter. Their daughter. They are parents now.

“Maybe,” he says thoughtfully, “none of that matters anymore. Maybe... all that matters now is her.”

His wife looks up at him with slight surprise. Then, she lets out a sob and nods. She shifts closer to their baby, pressing her nose to her head, crying quietly, happily.

Uchiha Sakura looked at her husband of thirty years: his coal hair, now flecked with ashes, and his muscles, now swathed in wrinkled flesh.

The emotionless beeping of the machine and the tubes, cold against his pale skin, are an excess, a reminder.

“I’ll call her.”

“Don’t.”

“You’ve got to fix things, Sasuke. She has to – ”

“I cannot blame her.”

“But it was never your fault.”

“That will never change the fact that I left her, you.”

She shook her head furiously. “You’re still her father, Sasuke-kun. And you’re ... you’re...”

Sasuke slowly raised his hand, touching his fingers to her forehead.  She met his smile then, placing his hand lovingly against her cheek, giving a firm nod despite her tears spilling. “I’ll see you.”

-

Sarada hesitantly walked to where he was lying, her steps, clinical: a match to the unerring beep, beep of the machine.  A branch was softly rapping against the window, and she turned to see the raindrops running down gently, a lone leaf swaying in place, then – a drumming, leaf snapping.

A final intake of breath:

“Mother told me to come.”

There was a smile behind his eyes when he opened them.

“Sarada.”

She stood there ill at ease, feeling the familiar surge of anger.

“Sarada...” he breathed, his voice strained yet full of warmth.

“Don’t be so familiar with me.”

With an enormous effort, he reached for something on the table – a quick shuffle then a resounding heap on the floor.

Sarada instinctively picked up the package wrapped in time-stained paper, giving it to him. Sasuke held her hands in place.

“Open it, Sarada.”

She had looked at her father for a brief haunting moment before doing as she was told.

She let out a choked sob, tears rising in her eyes, the object dissolving into her hand.

“I bought them from a store in a village,” his weak voice, thunderous to her ears, “For your first birthday. But I never made it back in time, did I?”

“Pa...pa,” her wavering voice, echoing elsewhere, filled and hollowed at the same time.

“Please forgive me, Sarada.”

“Papa.”

Through tears, she saw him smile with effort, his face, falling.

In the next breath, there was the final beep, the baby shoes on the floor.

...

Sakura goes to the left, so Sasuke decides to move right so that they can cover more ground, well shoes. He passes ones with lace, frills, and flowers all in different colors and he grabs the ones which he thinks Sakura may go for. He could easily buy every pair in the store, but he knows the shoes will have more meaning if both he and Sakura pick them out together. He wants the first shoes his daughter wears to have feeling and love behind them.

Sasuke reaches the end of the baby shoe aisle with six pairs, and happy with his selection, he starts walking back towards Sakura. Even though he already examined his half of the aisle, Sasuke keeps his eyes on the shelves in case he finds a pair he missed. Sometimes one doesn't always see everything the first time, and Sasuke is not going to let his unborn daughter's dream shoes not be discovered because he only looked at the shelves once.

Sasuke does spot one pair of shoes he likes that he doesn't remember seeing before, and after giving them a full glance over, he adds them to his pile. They aren't his favorite pair, but they are cute enough that if Sakura wanted them, he would agree to buying them. The one pair he missed before is all that Sasuke grabs though by the time he reaches his wife who is back to her starting place with an arm full of shoes.

"I hope our daughter doesn't shop like you or we're going to be broke by retirement." Sasuke tells the joke believing Sakura will laugh, but instead he is shot a cold glare and he cringes as his wife waddles over to him.

"Funny man, huh? Maybe you should be a helpful man and carry some of these shoes for me." Sakura demands as she waddles her way over to a Sasuke who is trying to hold back his laughter by biting his bottom lip. Normally he would be a bit afraid of her and her anger, but his very pregnant wife looks more like an upset penguin when she walks enraged, so he finds her cute more than anything.

"Here, give me these." Sasuke utters to his wife as he takes half of her shoe pile away from her, easily making the glare from her face drop and a smile appear instead.

"Thanks, sweetie! So how are we going to decide on a pair?" Sakura inquires to her husband as she waddles over to a bench near by to rest. She sets the shoes next to her as Sasuke plops himself on the floor beside Sakura's feet and puts his on his left side.

"Process of elimination?" Sasuke offers as he holds up a pair of baby shoes he had taken from Sakura's pile.

"Okay, starting with those." Sakura offers with a wave of her hand. Sasuke nods and set the shoes to his right side where the discard pile will form.

"Next pair then." Sasuke says before Sakura holds up a pair from her pile.

"Too much lace." Sasuke states and Sakura tosses them into the discard pile in response.

"Next." Which leads Sasuke to hold up the third pair of shoes to be looked at, only to meet the same fate as the two before.

The processes continues as Sasuke and Sakura go back and forth with holding up a pair of baby shoes and deciding their fate. Many of the shoes are thrown in the discard pile, for various reasons. Sasuke usually deciding against the shoes for 'too much lace,' 'not cute enough,' or 'too many colors.' While Sakura vetoes shoes because they are 'too manly,' 'lacking foot support,' or 'ridiculous looking.' Due to the numerous reasons for deciding against pairs, no shoes make it to the acceptance pile; a few are thrown in a maybe pile though. However, after more consideration, Sasuke and Sakura put all those shoes into the discard pile as well.

Both Sasuke and Sakura slump as they look at the pile of shoes they had chosen against. Sasuke had counted 62 pairs of shoes, and he tries to calculate the odds of not liking one pair enough to buy. Sakura on the other hand, glares at the pile as if it is the shoes fault that she and her husband aren't buying one of them, which she believes.

"Should we go somewhere else?" Sakura offers as she starts to stand back up; Sasuke soon following suit.

"Sure. You can head out towards the front of the store while I put these shoes back on the shelves." Sasuke comments as he starts picking up pairs of shoes form the pile.

Sakura smiles at her sweet husband as she stands up, and as he is straightening up from picking up shoes, she plants a kiss on her cheek when he reaches her lips height.

"I picked the best guy, didn't I?" Sakura mutters as she pulls away from Sasuke and starts making her way to the front of the store. Sasuke just shakes his head at his wife as she walks away, but there is a smile on his face as he starts putting the shoes back on the shelves while thinking about what a great woman he chose.

Sasuke had thought he would arrive at the front of the store and maybe see his wife in a bad mood because she's now hungry and needs food immediately. He even wondered if he would find her at the front of the store. However, he did not expect to find his wife yelling at some other pregnant lady while holding onto one shoe and pulling it her way.

Stunned by what his wife is doing, Sasuke just stares at Sakura. Sakura on the other hand notices his appearance and brings him out of his dumbfounded state as she starts yelling at him.

"Sasuke! These are the shoes!" Sasuke instantly grasps what Sakura is vocalizing, and at the recognition of such, he sighs.

Comprehending the situation much better now, Sasuke walks over to the two pregnant women and pulls the shoes out of both of their hands. Both woman are now stunned by him, and he takes the few seconds of silence to look over the shoes. They are mostly white, but they have a green lace bow on the top of the toes and a fake crystal in the center of the bow. The strap that goes across the middle of the foot is also green, and after seeing his evaluation, Sasuke agrees with Sakura. Both of the women have found their voices again, and just as they both go to speak, Sasuke interrupts them.

"We're buying this pair, Sakura." Sakura lets out a squeal of delight and rushes over to hug her husband as the other woman crosses her arms and glares at both Sasuke and Sakura.

"No! That's the only pair and I had them first!" The woman argues as she walks to stand right in front of Sasuke and Sakura. The woman glares at both of them, but she mainly focuses on Sakura; blaming her for the whole fiasco.

"Actually, you're wrong." Sasuke states matter of factly as he points at the sign on the table the shoes had come from. The woman drops her glare and turns her head slowly to look at the sign.

"This is just a display table of the shoes. It clearly states if you find a pair you like on this table, you take the shoes to the counter and they will grab a pair you can buy. " Sasuke says sassily to the woman as he turns around, grabs Sakura's hand, and pulls her along towards the counter so they can buy the shoes.

Sasuke doesn't look back at the woman, but he hears her mutter 'pinky was right' and smirks knowing his wife had noticed the sign.

Sakura and Sasuke buy the shoes with no problem, and as they walk out of the store with their new purchase, Sakura gives Sasuke a squeeze on his arm.

"Sarada's going to look so cute in these!" Sakura exclaims as she swings the bag with her free hand and pictures her unborn daughter in the shoes.

"Definitely." Sasuke responds back to his wife as he too pictures his unborn daughter in the baby shoes they had just bought. Shoes which they had chosen after going through 62 other pairs and Sakura getting into a fight with another woman. He smirks as he imagines being able to tell his daughter the story in the future.

Not really a plot, but I wanted to write about Sasuke and Sakura buying baby shoes for little Sarada!

Happy summer!

~S-cherry-Blossem