#squip x reader

"-I dont want any guy at my school, I want you!" The words fly out of your mouth before you can have any say in the matter, buy you don't back down; maintaining a serious look on your face directed at the SQUIP.

All day he's been pestering you about going on a date, or hooking up - it's college culture, after all. And people enjoy it! - and you had reached your boiling point. Every guy that he suggested was disgusting, you didn't like any of then. You knew you wouldn't. You've never been interested in guys your own age,.. or who are nice,.. or your own species-

If you could even call the SQUIP a species, anyway. He was a computer. A very, very smart one who seemed... at times... to have feelings. Mostly irritation and pride but feelings all the same. That gave you hope.

You recognise how dumb your having hope was but, well, you couldn't help it.

You also don't get how Squip didn't see it in you, he has access to everything - your every thought, - but he never let on that he had any idea of your feelings toward him. Maybe he was trying to ignore it? That would sure make sense.

"... excuse me?" The Squip's voice is deadpanned while his face looks unamused, and dubious, and about a million other things you never want to see the guy you like look at you with when you tell them, and it makes you roll your eyes.

"You heard me." You don't have to repeat yourself to him! The asshole.

"You're being irrational." He sighs eyes rolling upwards into his skull. Then he rolls his shoulders, shakes his head in disappointment, and regains his composure; twisting his cufflinks that are always perfectly anyway considering he's a computerised image. "Honestly, if your period wasn't coming up in two days then I'd say you were crazy."

Jaw dropping, you suddenly wish you could touch him without his authorisation (he needs to access your nervous system to make it feel as if you're touching)- so you can hit him. "Low blow- and you know it." He's a computer- other dudes may actually think that periods impare women's thinking but the Squip knows that's just something you say to hurt someone. And you're not going to demean yourself explaining your bodily functions to him.

"No, menstruation doesn't impare your thinking," He admits, nodding matter-o-factly as he agrees with your thoughts, but not-at-all looking sincere. "But it does make you hormonal. You're just horny- it'll pass. I recognise that you've been having these thoughts for most of our time working together now but its your hormones causing you to voice them; trust me. Maybe I should switch to a less pleasing appearance?"

"Wh- no- "

"Hm, you know how I could help you relieve that horniness?"

Oh no. You know exactly where this is going. And it's not 'I can quickly fuck you'. No- "Don't you dare."

"Helping you hook up with Zack, yes."

"Squip!" You exclaim, frustration laced in everything about you; your tone, your eyes, your mouth and jaw, your hands- "It's not happening." You sat sternly. "I don't care if you don't want me back, you great asshole chip, but I'm not going to hook up with a frat boy like - "

"Reed then?"

"- Or a self righteous nerd like Reed. I'm not. I got you so you could help me be more comfortable in my own body, not have sex with random guys. And you know that! I don't know why you're constantly trying to get me in a guy's bed! Its- I- It defies reason!"

The Squip's form flickers, a snatch of his voice attempting to say 'reason' slipping out fuzzy as he seems to glitch at those last words. It only lasts for a few a moment, but it surprises you. Your face softens, and you reach towards him, not to touch him because you know you can't but just... because you have to- and- he actually looks at it as he returns seamlessly to his put-together air and appearance.

Theirs a curious look on his face as he grimaces at your hand. His eyes seem to be holding something back, but he's thinking about it.

"... your care for me defies reason. I'm a computer."

"I know." You shrug, gentle. All the frustration from before gone from your shoulders and everywhere else.

"Not a man." He reiterates, and you shrug.

"Well- you're a man a little. A computer wouldn't get so worked up."

"I'm an extremely superior computer."

"You are." You agree softly. "Alexa's got nothing on you. But you're also a man a little. Feelings cant be programmed." You insist, not pushing him but just stating a fact. Wanting him to believe it.

"I believe it." He growls, an annoyance in his voice thicker then humanly possible as he actually admits it. "Trust me, I... Its been a thought on my mind for a while, now." You open your mouth to ask him what he means by that, but he waives you off (rudely) and goes on. "You're right in saying feelings can't be programmed. Reactions can, but,.. not feelings. And the feelings you've been inciting in me, have not been programmable. I even tried to program them out, but- mm." Eyes growing slightly wider at him, you watch his jaw set and pop; frustration absolutely clear. "The only thing I can think is that its your fault. And, maybe, if I made you a little less available- a little less open to me- whatever virus is in me would lose interest. But... you're so fucking stubborn." Theirs actual anger in his eyes when he looks at you then, almost rage. Wow.

Your lips make an 'oh' shape. "Thats why you tried to get me to hook up with- "

"All those idiots, yes. But you just had to act like an obstinate little bitch and refuse every suggestion I made."

"Yeah, well, we know why that is- and don't call me that."

"Bitch." He growls, causing you to sigh in frustration (asshole, asshole, asshole- ), before he rolls his shoulders back and straightens up properly again. "... but you're right. You are. I know exactly why, and now you know my feelings- This interaction's been unprofessional as hell. It's gone too far. If I'm going to continue to assist you, help that you absolutely require," Gee thanks. "then I'm going to have to do a complete system reboot."

"You- " ??? "This is the most dramatic responce in history to being in love."

"I'm NOT in lo- " He cuts himself off before the word can come out, even if he was a full-man he would hate the word. Theirs nothing cool about being in love. To him it would be pathetic. "Thats it. In 5 minutes when I return post-reboot, this will be over and you will stifle your feelings about me- got it? That's how it should be. Now... " His appearance begins to flicker again, more frequently this time until he flickers completely out of existence like a TV switching off.

... you're about to panic, when the Squip touches back down onto the ground in front of you. He looks exactly the same as before except better posture, and when he looks down at you there with your wide eyes and your concerned frown, he immediately scowls.

"GODDAMNIT."

"Didn't work??" You light up. Quickly a mischievous smirk slips across your face, though, realising you're right when that pretty face scowls deeper. That means... oh, this computer must really have it bad for you. Ha. "I see... "

His eyes flash, actually flash - a blue light turning on inside them for a moment and making him looking almost demonic, - , and you suddenly appears directly in front of you, an unnaturally strong hand slamming you by the shoulder into the wall behind you. "You don't see... anything. This is a virus. I dont have feelings, for you."

Looking straight back at him in defiance, you nod. "It is a virus. I think everyone in the history of the world can agree on that."

He falters, so annoyed he almost can't decide what to say to you. "That doesn't even make sense, Y/N. Most people in the history of the world didn't even know what a virus was. It was first used 1898- " When you reach up and curl your fingers gently around the back of his neck he falters again, breathing in slowly and deeply- so sexy. "You're... what are you doing?"

... "Whatever you want me to." Its up to him. If he wants you to let him go, you will. If he wants you to keep going, you will. It's all up to him. You remember the first time you and the Squip kissed; he was just teaching you how (said it was completely okay because he was just in your head), but that was the start of your feelings. That was the start of this mess. You wonder if he was struggling before that and thats why he suggested it in the first place all those weeks ago.

When warm, firm lips slam into yours, forcing your lips to part and allow a forceful but exceptionally skilled tongue to take what it wants you're shocked and let out a squeak. The Squip's hand takes your throat now instead of your shoulder, squeezing shortly to tell you no, don't squeak. Not like you didn't ask for this, he thinks directly into your brain. Now what did I teach you then? If you remember so well? Don't sit there like a dumb statue. Kiss me back.

You stood, observing your Christmas tree. You had the ornaments…the tinsel…all that was missing was the centerpiece. The angel. 

“Squip?” 

“Yes?” 

You sat on the couch, grabbing your keys to prepare to head out and find an angel for your tree. 

“I found 1,312 results from a store with an angel.” 

That caught you off guard. Over a thousand…?

“Could you…maybe reduce that to a twenty mile radius?” 

“Understood. I found three results.” That sounded better. 

“Let’s go, Squip!” Knowing he would be forced to come with you one way or the other, you started your journey. 

You Squip was…not what you had initially thought it would be. Supercomputer of the brain? You had no problem dropping the money to get the “magical” pill that would help you accomplish your dreams. 

But lately…something’s felt off about him. Not in a bad way…more of a curious way. He claimed he did not feel, that he was a supercomputer and that was it. However, he more often than not now asked your questions about what you were feeling. 

It might be crazy…but you think your Squip was starting to feel. 

“It’s your fault, you know.” You looked over to your Squip before returning your eyes to the road. 

“My fault? What is?” 

“You’re giving me…feelings.” He seemed perplexed, as if the revelation was still new to him as well. 

“Isn’t…isn’t having feelings a good thing?” You asked honestly, not seeing the problem in having feelings. 

He scoffed, “No. It’s not. I shouldn’t have feelings. How am I supposed to secure the objective when my thoughts are full of…counterproductive feelings.” 

You looked over to him, something that would look off to anyone that couldn’t see your Squip. 

“I think…feelings can be good. But they can be bad. Whatever you’re going through Squip…I’m here to talk it out with you.” You cared for your Squip…deeply. He has done nothing but help you since you took that pill. He had been there with you through hard times, you simply wanted to express that you could do the same for him. 

He looked over to you with…fear. “I…I don’t want to feel. I want to be a mechanism…not some emotional man. I am a tool, not a man.” He sounded so…defeated. 

Arriving at your destination, you turned to him. “You’re not a tool…not to me.” You gave him a warm smile and exited the car, thinking the conversation was over. 

Browsing through the store, you took note of your Squip’s unusual quiet demeanor. Normally he always had something to say. Rather it be how terrible a store had been kept, to quizzing you over the next exam you’d have to take. 

You found the angel you wanted in no time, the last one in stock as well. Your Squip was still quiet, and every time you looked at him…he seemed lost in thought. 

Returning to the car, you tried to start up a new conversation. “Is this the cutest angel you’ve seen or what?” You showed him the purchase and put it in the back of the car. 

“There’s one angel cuter…” You barely heard the words he said and you hummed in acknowledgement. 

“What angel would that be?” 

He turned away from you. He didn't seem to want to give an answer, so you left it at that. 

Your Squip called your name, and you turned to him. “I’m going to have a break. I will see you tonight,” he said. 

You tilted your head in confusion. What would a supercomputer do on a break…? 

Before you could question him, he was gone. You knew he was there…somewhere. He said he would be back tonight, so maybe it’s nothing to worry about. 

You decided to take the time to finish wrapping your Christmas presents to put under the tree. You had gotten your Squip a present. The purpose of it was defeated, since he could read your mind. But you wanted to get him something anyway. 

Wrapping his present first, you got to work. You had come upon some money since taking an internship, and found yourself getting presents for anyone you could think of. Even if they got you nothing in return…it didn’t matter. To see your friends, acquaintances, and family smile upon opening a present...it was all worth it. 

A yawn escaped your lips and you saw it was getting rather late. You must have gotten caught up wrapping all those presents…and your Squip had yet to return. 

Deciding he might be out for the night, you decided to make dinner. You had fun with it, singing your favorite songs and dancing around the kitchen. You just knew your Squip would be laughing at your antics if he saw, but you still heard nothing. 

Another yawn escaped, and you made quick work of your dinner, ready to head to bed. 

Putting away your dishes, you headed to your bedroom. Maybe…you could have another good conversation with your Squip when you woke up…you’d like that. 

You had nearly fallen asleep when you felt your Squip form in the room with you. You kept your eyes open to try and see him. 

“You’re so tired…chances are you won’t even remember this conversation when you wake up.” He stated the obvious. You were exhausted. 

“S’okay. You were gone for hours…is everything okay?” Thinking it could be serious, you went to get up but he waved you back in bed. 

“Don’t worry about it…” He said that…but it only made you worry more. Picking up on that fear spike in your emotions, he sat at your bed. “I’m fine. Just…processing is all.” 

“If you say so…” You trusted him, if it was serious he would have said something. “Did you…need something before bed?” 

You could see him smile even in the dark, “no…just wanted to wish you a good sleep. We can talk more tomorrow.” He stood up, and you lost the last grip of consciousness you had.