#spsk

AITC for attacking my human? Dear Tumblr, I am called Mikeko (young, cat, male) and my girlfriend* (young, human, male) recently locked me out of OUR room after I tried to destroy his.. what I like to call "hunting whiskers." You see, he constructs them every morning before roaring into a mirror and leaving for a hunt. He then usually deconstructs them once he returns, where he will then proceed to shower me with affection and eventually prepare my dinner! Sometimes he brings his hunting responsibilities back home though and has the audacity to ignore me for stacks of what he calls "papers." On these days he typically forgets to deconstruct his whiskers so I figure maybe that's the problem! I try to be helpful and dismantle them myself with a precision strike from behind -- their blind spot! -- but I think their control over him is too strong some days and he gets angry instead of appreciating my gesture to free him of these responsibilities (and pet me more.) I feel like he's being unreasonable for not devoting his full attention to me after being out all day. AITC?

*This is a title he has given me, and the dog that has been visiting on occasion with one of my human's friends tells me that for humans these affectionate titles go both ways. She offered me alternative titles her previous human would call their close human when he wasn't around, but they didn't seem as endearing... So I too shall call my human "girlfriend" as that is the title he has blessed me with. I hope I am honouring this tradition correctly.

Make a wish on our sorry little hearts Have a smoke, pour a drink, steal a kiss in the dark Fingernails on my skin like the teeth of a shark I'm intoxicated by the lie