#spnfami

Are you still on the dusty road, tripping over the stones you created?

Does the stranger give you more comfort than you gave him?

Perhaps the stray mutt walking in your shadow, give you a

sense of belonging ?

Do you take the odd jobs, hold up the cardboard signs at the stop signs?

Does anyone even slow down for you?

Do you watch us go by, ignoring you as you did us?

Snap those fingers again for us!

Play us a tune upon the broken guitar you found.

Try to find your way back into our good graces,

The cabin was small, but warm. In a way, it reminded them of the bunker. A side was for Sam and his family, when they came. 

The other side was for Dean and Miracle. Doors opened to fields full of dragonflies and butterflies. Or other dogs, ready to romp. 

Donna often thought of Dean and Sam, as did Jody and the girls. They both remembered the day that Sam told them about Dean. How he tried to keep it together but it just was not possible. They waited to release their own grief. He had alway said that was the way he wanted to go. All he knew him thought he would alway beat the odds. He was only a call away. Donna was not even aware that she had given Deans old number. She just thought it might be good for Sam to hunt. 

Gar would pass along old hunting stories that grew with each telling. Each teller added their own take on the past lives. 

Dean would sometimes gently put his hand in the smooth flowing stream  behind the home, letting the peace of the water flow back to those troubled souls he left behind. And then, they would think of a silly thing and laugh for a moment.

The boys got the invite within the hour, not sure of how the time frame was. You were never late, even if you wanted to be. Nothing started till  you or your party was there. 

I used to like that day.

Excited to yell and holler 

at the flat screen that never answered back.

I would give them directions on what to do next?

Dean, Tell him for Christs sake?

Can I say that?

Cas, just give him a quick peck on the check,

maybe even pick up a pie?

I have never seen you cook!

Sam, who is the woman in the background?

Did you adopt Dean, I never saw her in the background.

What of the dog? 

He wasn’t a pup, was he a senior?

So many questions,

no answers

anymore.

He watched Cas get ready to leave.

Leaving him alone while he went with Jack,

He never says why,

“It would be like breaking confidentiality ,like a Doctor”

He ruffles Dean’s bed head into a somewhat neater shape.

Dean sighs and throws himself back onto rumpled sheets.

“It’s not fair! You have wings! Why can’t I? Dean swigs down his

version of morning breakfast.

“Because your just dead. Your not an angel! Cas explains for the 

umpenth time.

“Dean sits up , spread arms wide, “So make me one!”

Cas shakes head again, afraid if he keeps this up, it will fall off.

“Only God can make an angel, Cas sits down and strokes Deans

slumping shoulders.

“Ask him, Dean looks down as he says it. He knows Jack has already

done a lot but when Cas leaves, if only for a minute, he is alone. 

True he has friends but they have their own afterlife. Even Sam,

there with his family.

Cas shakes his head no. He lifts up the chin to kiss him on the 

sunburned nose. “You ask him” He smiles and is gone.

Do we pray in Heaven? Dean wondered. Also Jack said he wouldn’t

interfere with those , well he did say on earth really. Nothing about Heaven.

Dean gets off the bed and onto the rug. He clasps his hands together,

closing his eyes, he begins a prayer. It was only for one thing, He 

needed it to be with Cas.  He knows he shouldn’t. He can feel that even as he starts, like a warning.  But, he just feels so alone. Even with every day, perfect you do need something, just to let you know how good those days are.

Dean feels the tingle between his shoulder, then a blazing feeling, It was not really painful, just sort of like if you spilled some hot glue on your fingers. As if something was being put on him. “Wings! I am getting wings! Knew they wouldn’t let me down!”

Dean ran out into the yard, He ripped off his shirt and unfurled his new wings. They were paper thin and bright butterfly wings. He sighed. “Should have been specific.” 

They were nice he admitted. He inspected them as they dried in the morning sun. Stronger then they look. He thought about would they remain out all the time or could he fold them in? 

Now they were dry, a soft wind circled around him. The warm air playing with him, He thought of flying and he was, The orange and black monarch wings flapping loud as he climbed faster and circled the pond to really get a look at them. O.K.  So what, he had wings, but no one else had these.

I would have liked to seen the other Cas,

maybe all of them.

Was one a woman?

Maybe a squirrel?

Did he stand before Dean in golden armour?

Why this Cas?

Of all the worlds, all the universe,

was the block broken in this one?

Do the others have over coats?

Was there a Cas with the other brothers from the other dimension?

They never really said anything about him.

Was there only a few of them,

To help the plot line?

Was that Dean raised up from the bowels of Hell?

I watched you, in the hall.

The knife pressed to your chest.

Why did you not tell them?

Did you feel that you would show them 

your fear of your weakness

and your strength?

Your heart, dear lad.

I would have been in that hall

besides you.

The spacer, those who slip in 

between the spaces of the written words.

The break between the pace of the show that

makes no sense.

And what would we have asked you,

To make you think?

They are trying to wear you down, to nibble at your reserve.

But I might have been able to help by asking some questions?

Who had the power to fix the ring?

Was it aimed at you?

Why, when coming clean of your guilty secrets, did you not mention

Vamps snuggled in their nest. Dreaming of blood banks, all dressed in their best. Demons  were scattered around. Hoping to nab reindeers when they landed on the ground. In the bunker, Crowley placed hot burning coals in the stocking with care. It was something his mother, Rowena had dared. Jack and Cas were up late, trying to decorate a tree. Doing such a bad job, it filled Lucifer with glee! Dean and Sam were in the kitchen, making a dinner. Roasting  wild turkey and a fat boar, in the oven covered with spices. By just the smell, you knew it was nice. The door opened in marched, Jody and Donna, pies in hand. The rest of the group followed after, singing to beat the band. Gar and Bes brought the pups and to everyone’s delight, she thought another one may be in sight

She promised to name this one Dean.

Oh how he did beam.

I watched an angel smile last night.

Wings outspread as his lips finally

gave voice to his heart’s song.

I breathed softly, knowing a declaration of love

would end in tragedy.

I cried the rippling  tears that Dean tried to hide.

Wondering if he had only a moment more,

he would have given an answer