#split day

I could see a single crack begin;

His eyes fluttering, unsure if being blind would be

The better option than staring at the smoke before him,

Slipping through his hands.

No. What are you talking about?

The crack widened and I could see the knife go in

Gutting him and placing every memory on the table

Bloodied and torn and ruined.

No. Please. P-Please don’t. Ryan-

I twisted the knife and his face paled

The perfect marble of an indestructible deity

Crumbling by my very doing;

I was playing God when I was only a flawed fool.

G-get out. I said get out! Out!

He yanked the knife out of his chest

Blood coming from his eyes

And falling onto his lonely hands.

Get away from me!

He lunged forward and found the perfect spot

Right between my ribs.

He hesitated, but I leaned into it.

We met halfway. Finally.

My footsteps no longer had a leader

As I ran from the crime,

Blood on my hands and covering my face.

The blood stained deeper than skin,

Never washing out

But not tracking on the shirts of the knife-less backs

I gripped tightly for one last impossible moment.

It was daylight.

We all stood under one sun like mortals.

We were already weak and on borrowed time,

Sucked dry from the fruitful universe

But somehow the days I spent by the phone

Aged me more than ever.

The same six words, tracing the wound left by him.

Our spot. Find me. I’ll be there.

Silence said more than enough,

But I never did.

I listened far too much.

To me, to them, but never him.

Except when those tiny suns were up in the sky

And I was up in my room,

Solitude always my partner in bed

And blood covering my sheets.

It was my lover, and my God, so was he.

He spoke to me.

He spoke to everyone.

Just lay in the atmosphere

If my sickening lover would ever leave me,

Drowning in my crimson guilt, I would.

Lie among the tiny suns of varying consequences

Who turned themselves to shine down on him

Worship him.

Love him.