#spiderofthedepression

Part One: The Tortures

The only marker of time for the demi-god was the tortures, they would allow him an hour of rest in the dark room before dragging him out to continuing the never ending tortures. Emrys didn't even have the energy to lift his head as the dragged him along a corridor, his mind barely registering which rooms they were passing.

'Freezing...burns...knives...animals....' He lifted his head slightly as they stopped. 'So it's drowning today....' His chin collided with his chest again, unable to keep his head up any longer. 'Maybe today I'll stop coming back.'

The men holding Emrys up dropped him to open the door, knowing that he was to weak to run away, and he hit the ground with a grunt. A hollow laugh left his lips, he didn't even have enough energy left to stop the pain from the short drop. The men picked him up and all but threw him into a the room where two new men grabbed his arms and pulled him to a water tank, chaining him to a chair. The demi-gods green eyes watched tiredly as they began to poor ice into the tank before they flick up to the ceiling and watching the reflection of the water dance. His mind went back to the last time he was with Peter, they were in the cave laying on the couch Emrys had managed to get. Peter had fallen asleep on Emrys chest and Emrys had his arms around the hero. Emrys shook his head to get rid of the memory, it hurt to think about his boyfriend. He couldn't understand why no one had come for him yet, why Peter or his family hadn't found him and freed him yet. Emrys was starting to think that maybe he'd imagined them all because if these people really cared for him like he thought someone would have found him already.

He looked back to the men as the forced him to his feet and pulled him over to the tank, chaining his wrists to the chain that would lower him into the icy water, and cutting off his shirt and pants. So he was to feel every bit of pain that this was going to give him. Emrys breath quicken as he was lifted above the tank, he was afraid of the pain that came with this particular torture. The demi-god began to fight against the bonds that held him, he wanted out, he had to get away before the cold water hit his skin, but all it did was rip open the skin of his wrist and send warm blood streaming down his arms. The men laughed and dropped Emrys into the water. If he could have screamed, Emrys would have, the feeling of the freezing water stabbing into his body, into his very soul, was more than Emrys could take. He tried to breath in the water, tried to end it quicker but the survival instinct was to strong, he couldn't force his body to take the water into his lungs. Soon the pressure in his head started and he began to see spots of color, it felt as if someone was squeezing his head in a vice. There was black in the corner of his vision, almost done, almost gone. Emrys kept thinking those words as he fought against the chains, trying to keep his body moving to keep the warmth there. Finally his body couldn't fight it any longer and he breathed in the water, his body shuddered as the cold water entered his lungs and then slumped as the darkness took Emrys mind.

There was...peace in the darkness. No pain, no cold or water, just quiet. Emrys closed his eyes and smiles slightly, maybe this time he'd be allowed to stay here. Maybe he'd wouldn't be forced back into the world where the only marking of time was pain. But no, there it was, the pull that meant he was coming back to life.

'No. Not again. Please Allfather, let this end. Please.'

Emrys rolled over, coughing up water as his body shook. He was still in his boxers, still soaking wet, and still held captive. The men were laughing at him and then suddenly they went silent, Emrys looks up to see an older man walking up to him. He couldn't stop shaking and as the man reached for him he flinched back, he couldn't help himself, for so long the only hands extended to him had caused him pain.

'He is too weak, give him a little fire, we don't want him dead just yet.'

The man walked away and a few of the men light a few candles, placing them far from Emrys and leaving the room. The demi-god waits until he hears the click of the lock before pulling himself over to the closest candle with shaking arms. This was pathetic, the son of Loki, feeding of the energy of a candle, but he couldn't stop shaking he needed the energy, the warmth. All to soon warm tears feel down Emrys cheeks as he curls around the candle, trying to get as warm as he could.

Part Two: The Calm Of After

Emrys screamed, he'd never screamed louder in his life but this pain was to much. His body thrashed with the arcs of electricity that flowed through him and then the screaming stopped as blood pooled into his mouth. He sags as the current stops, choking on his own blood until the men thrust a open flame in front of him and he gets the strength to heal the ripped flesh of his inner throat.

'Why don't you just kill me...w-why prolong this...' The men laugh and one of them punches Emrys across the face but none answer him. 'P-Please...just kill me.'

The laughter echoes around the room as the current is back on and Emrys screams again, his body thrashing and pulling against the restraints that held him to the metal chair.

It was an hour later that Emrys was thrown into his dark cell, groaning at the pain from the burns that covered his body. He lays on the floor, watching his hand jerk and convulse for a moment before he starts to pull himself to the cot in the corner of the cell. It takes him a few tries to get his shaking arms to cooperate and the effort of pulling himself up onto the cot left the demi-god gasping in pain. He curls into a ball, trying to ignore the pain from his back. A choked sob pushes its way past Emrys lips, and soon tears start to fall down the phoenixes cheeks, it was to much. There was to much pain to much darkness and cold and Emrys couldn't take it for much longer. He knew his sanity was slipping, he knew that only a few more days of this and the person who he was would be gone forever.

'Peter. Think about Peter.' Even though thinking about his boyfriend hurt, Emrys knew that is where is sanity was. 'Second date, we went to the pizza place. Had pepperoni pizza. Think about the way his eyes lit up when he talked about his tracers.'

Emrys squeezed his eyes shut tightly, trying to picture the hero, trying to picture the way he talked, moved, smiled. Trying to remember the feel of Peters hand in his own, his arms around the hero's shoulders as they walk. The sound of his laugh, the feel of his lips when Peter kissed him. Everything that Emrys loved about Peter Parker he tried to remember though his pain, and even though it hurt Emrys felt an overwhelming feeling of peace. His body relaxed against the coarse blanket as his arms slowly stopped shaking, but the tears still fell.

Part Three:  The Rescue

 Darkness, peace, quiet, Emrys had been in the dark place that he went to when he died for so long now that he was beginning to think he'd finally died his final death. They had been torturing his for what felt like a week with no breaks at all and the final torture was burning, the last thing the demi-god remembered was the white hot pain of fire eating away at his flesh.

'Death isn't so bad, it's quiet here and it doesn't hurt anymore.' Emrys looked around the darkness, a slight smile on his face. 'And they can't get to me here, I'm finally safe from them.' He laughed before quickly stopping surprised. It had been so long since he laughed. 'I'm free...I'm free!' The phoenix burst into gales of laughter before stopping suddenly, he heard something, a voice. 'No...please no. Please let me stay.'

'Emrys!'

The teen turned suddenly at the name, his name, but it wasn't the sound of his name being called that made him turn, it was the voice that called it.

'P-Peter...?' Emrys waited a moment straining his eyes against the darkness, looking for his boyfriend. 'Peter!?'

There was no answer, no voice that filled Emrys with the feeling of safety and hope.

'I-I must have imagined it...'

'Oh god, Emrys.'

That time Emrys was sure, it was Peter Parker, his boyfriend, he'd come for him.

'Peter! Peter I'm here! I'm here...'

The demi-god looked around trying to find something to boost his strength so that he could come back.

'Emrys, don't do this, come on...come back...please come back'

He could feel something pressing against his chest, and then something against his mouth.

'CPR...He's doing CPR. Peter I'm here, I'm right here. Just keep helping me fight.'

Emrys drops down into the lotus position and closes his eyes, searching the deepest corners of his mind for just the smallest amount of energy.

'You. Are. Not. Leaving. Me.'

The darkness was slowly turning into gray, it was working, Peter was bringing him back.

'Just a little more, come on Little Earthling, bring me back.' Emrys dived into the cage that held Match, stealing the needed energy from his weakened madness. It wasn't much, barely enough to keep his heart beating for a few minutes, but it would do. And then, Emrys felt it, the pull that meant he was coming back to life. 'Yes! Yes...I'm coming Peter, I'm coming.'

Suddenly everything was bright and Emrys was cold, and it hurt and he was gasping for breath, but there was Peter, above him. He blinked once before pulling Emrys into a tight hug, burring his face into the demi-gods shoulder.

'Thank god. Thank god...'

Emrys weak, skinny, shaking arms slowly lift to try and return the hug, using Peters body heat to give him strength, but it wasn't really enough and he could barely keep his eyes open.

'You found me...You came for me...You came...'

Those were the last words Emrys managed to say before he fell unconscious, sagging in the teen hero's arms.

A simple steady beat, that was the first thing that Emrys registered. Beep, beep, beep, beep. And then darkness took him again.

Warmth, he was warm, not yet at his normal temperature but it was better than the cells.

'This is nice...'

When Emrys came half way back to consciousness for the third time he could hear people talking, he couldn't tell who most of them were but one. One was Peter. Then the demi-god slipped back into unconsciousness.

This time was different, this time Emrys knew he was really truly waking up. He could feel the blankets over him, the pillow under his head, and someone holding his hand. It took the phoenix a moment to get his eyes to open and he found himself in a simple room, it wasn't a hospital but it was obviously a part of some sort of medical center. He almost panicked, thinking that maybe this was a new torture, before he turned his head and saw Peter. He had pulled a chair to the bed side and fallen asleep on the edge of the bed, his head resting on his arm and his hand holding Emrys' hand. Emrys watched the teen hero sleep for a moment before noticing something, Peter seemed a little run down.

'What happened to him...' Emrys lifted his other arm, staring at it for a moment because it was so skinny, before reaching across himself to place his hand on top of Peters head. 'You're really here...You saved me...'

Emrys pulls his hand away as Peter groans slightly, starting to wake up. The teen raises his head and blinks for a moment as he sees Emrys staring back at him.

'You're awake.' Emrys nods slightly, a slight smile crossing his face for a moment. 'Are...Are you alright?' Another nod. 'Then why aren't you saying anything? D-Did they...'

Worry sparked to life in Peters eyes as he lets his sentence fade

'I...' Emrys cleared his throat, it'd been so long since he last said anything and his voice was slightly raspy. 'I finally figured out how to shut up.'

Peter lets out a shaky laugh at Emrys joke.

'You sure you're alright Emrys?'

'I...I'm a little thirsty, kinda cold, and half sure this is a dream...But I don't care.' Emrys reaches over to Peter and strokes the heros cheek. 'If this is a dream, I like it.'

Peter smiles slightly and places his hand over Emrys before reaching for a water pitcher on the bedside table and pouring the demi-god a glass of water.

'It's not a dream Emrys, this is real. I promise.'

'That's just what a dream would say.'

Emrys takes the glass from Peter, and quickly drinks the liquid. It was cold but it felt so good against Emrys dry throat that he sighs slightly

'Good?'

Emrys nods once.

'Yeah, now...if I could just warm up a bit...'

Peter smiles slightly before climbing onto the bed next to Emrys and wrapping his arms around the demi-god.

'Will this help?'

'Yeah, that...really...helps...'

And with that Emrys drifts off to sleep, feeling perfectly safe for the first time in he didn't know how long.

Part Four: The After Affects.

Emrys was lying in Peters arms, both awake and neither teen saying anything. They had quickly found out that Emrys was having horrible nightmares from his time being tortured, and even though he was allowed to go home the nightmares didn't stop. And soon the couple had found out that the only way to calm Emrys down after the nightmares was for Peter to be there with him, to convince him that he was safe, so Peter had spent the next two days convincing his fathers to let him stay with Emrys.

Emrys takes a deep breath, inhaling the hero's scent as he closes his eyes and tries to forget the newest nightmare. Peters hand moved slightly, gently rubbing Emrys arm in an attempt to make him feel safe, and it worked slightly.

'Do you wanna talk about it?'

Emrys shakes his head slightly.

'I...I can't. I never wanted you to see me this weak.'

Emrys voice was soft and quiet, the way it had been since he woke up. He was almost scared that if he spoke to loudly then he'd wake himself up and find out it was a dream. Peter smiles slightly at Emrys admission, the demi-god was weak from his three months of torture but still he wanted to be strong.

'Hey, I brought you back to life, I think I can stand to hear about your nightmares.' He chuckles slightly, stopping when Emrys pulls himself closer him. 'Hey, I don't care about any of that. I just want to know what's getting to you, after all how can I help if I don't know the problem?'

Emrys looks up at his boyfriend, the fear of what plagued his sleeping hours clear in his eyes.

'I-I...' The demi-god sighs and rolls onto his back, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his chin on them. 'I was dreaming about when they'd drown me...The put ice in the water so it'd hurt more when I finally took the water in but they didn't know, or at least I think they didn't know that the cold felt like someone was holding white hot flames to my body.' Emrys' body shook slightly at the memory and Peter quickly sat up, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend. But before he could say anything Emrys continued. 'And each minute felt like an hour, an hour of feeling that burn and that pain and I couldn't make myself breath in the water to end it. I tried, I did, but the survival instinct was to strong and I...I...'

Emrys trailed off as tears start to roll down his cheeks, something that made Peter frown. Emrys was always so strong, mentally and physically, but now the demi-god was broken and even though Peter was doing his best to keep his boyfriend together the smallest thing shattered him again. The teen hero tightens his arms around Emrys, pulling him closer to him and laying back down on the bed.

'You're safe Emrys, they can't get you here. I promise.' Emrys almost clings to Peter, still crying and still afraid, though he didn't say anything just nodded his head. Peter strokes Emrys hair lightly, murmuring words of comfort to the demi-god as he pulls the blankets back over the two of them. 'It will be alright, I promise. Just go back to sleep, I'm right here.'

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It wasn't until three weeks later that Emrys was able to go a full night with out one nightmare and by that time he had convinced himself that he really had been saved. He woke up to the feeling of Peters arms around him and the sound of the hero's heart beating steadily, and for the first time since he had been rescued the demi-god felt safe. He didn't know why though until Peter woke up, groaning softly.

'Hey, you're up.' Emrys smiles slightly and nods, still trying to figure out why he felt so rested. 'You didn't have any nightmares last night.'

'I didn't?'

Emrys sits up slightly, he only ever remembered his nightmares right after they happened.

'Yep, no nightmares, not screaming out or crying.' Peter smiles slightly at the look of happiness that filled Emrys eyes. 'Looks like you're cured, and I can go back to sleeping in my own bed.'

Emrys frowns slightly at that.

'I'd give it a few more weeks before saying I'm cured, maybe even a few months.' The demi-god lays back down against Peter, draping his arm across his boyfriend's chest. 'After all, it could just be a freak occurrence.'

'You just want to keep using me for a pillow, don't you Lokison?'

Peter chuckled as Emrys laughs, glad that Emrys was starting to sound like his old self again.

'Whatever would give you that idea?' He snuggles closer the Peter, nuzzling his head into Peters chest. 'I just want to make sure the night-terrors are really gone.'

'Of course, that's all you want.'