#spenture

Another rush of information. No, you're not a Mica person, though you do like and own some Agate and Smokey Quartz. There's a couple of game-related figurines lying around, disturbed by your recent attempt to pick everything up at once. Skimbleshanks died a few months ago, but you recently adopted a new kitten whom you haven't yet picked a name for. You really should get onto that.

You started taking to mask-wearing on your streams after an incident last year. It's digitally-generated and edits-out your snaggletooth canine and turns your eyes from olive to a crimson, which you reckon is pretty cool. You're certainly are more on-edge and withdrawn about your online doings since then. You also have a few real masks, but they're part of a collection so you don't touch them that often.

You can't afford airwovens (they're overpriced crap anyhow) but you did one better by using Irn Bru and Wham wrappers, latticed together in a makeshift decoupage over your volleys.

Behold... the Irn-Shu.

Yeah, you don't really wear them that much.

INPUT STATUS: PROCESSED

REMAINING UNSET VALUES NON-ESSENTIAL: CREATION POINTS UNSPENT: 30

EXITING CREATION, RE-SYNCHRONISING FOR TIME DILATION...COMPLETE.

AWAITING GAME ACTIVATION. PROCESS ETA - 8 HOURS

PRESS [START] WHEN READY.

(HELP MENU UNLOCKED - 'META' TAB DEACTIVATED.)

BB-8008: What the goddamn just happened? VerdeVertigo: is everything okay? the stream seemed messed-up for a bit and you are shaking pretty bad BB-8008: I think so, I felt like something just shocked me in the head. I really don't need this right now. VerdeVertigo: you can end the stream early if you want, hellblade looked really cool earlier and it was great seeing you play something other than that korean game BB-8008: You mean League of Legends? Please don't remind me of that already. BB-8008: Plus it's not Korean, just really, really popular with the Scene there. VerdeVertigo: ok VerdeVertigo: btw I ordered a copy like you wanted but you have to help me VerdeVertigo: I know nothing about mmos except runescape

MODIFIERS APPLIED: SLEUTH +1

SKILLS ADDED: DISGUISE +1, GEOLOGY, COMPUTING, MAKEUP, WIELD (GLOVE/CULINARY/KNIFE)

QUIRKS ADDED: ‘PROPERLY PARANOID’, 'POWERED BY PRODUCT'

INPUT ERROR IDENTIFIED: AUTOCORRECTING… LOCATION CONFIRMED:  55°58' N  3°10'W EST. FIDELITY: LOW

17.9

17

AGE CONFIRMED: 6533

ADDITIONAL STATISTICS GENERATED.

The program spits out a bunch of numbers. Whatever mysterious data collection ability it has, its level of accuracy continues to unnerve you, to the extent that you’re increasingly perturbed by having it all streamed to your audience – even if it’s currently of 6-7 people, all of whom you kind of know. It originally spat out some strange spelling mistakes, but yes you do indeed live in Leith, a suburb of Edinburgh on the FrathFirth of Forth. It seems to register you as ‘British’, much to your dismay and disgust. Your parents left the chad world of chavs over a decade ago and you’re rather happy here, well, most of the time. There’s even a decent LGBT scene, even if you really aren’t interested in exploring that side of things for another year or so. That’s a whole different agender (teeheehee).

Speaking of waiting, you’re graduating from S6 next week; you could’ve dropped-out sooner, but you decided to stick around for the extra two years in the hopes of getting into University. You’re not sure why it’s displaying your age like that, but it probably makes sense? It got everything else more or less right. Even if you wish it didn’t!

Gaming is very much your main jam, it’s fun to extract salt from losers though you’re a pretty competitive person and can get a pretty tilted when people mess things up. You also enjoy cooking and work part-time at a Chippy. While you certainly don’t feel fat, the local cuisine has rubbed onto you a bit lately! You want to work somewhere more refined, but it’ll be hard to wean yourself off pakora, festy cock and rumbledethumps.

You are HEAT-SENSITIVE, which you aren’t sure is because of living here so long, or an actual thing of yours – either way it’s one of the reasons you love Scotland.

MODIFIERS APPLIED: IMAGINATION +1, FITNESS  -1

SKILLS ADDED: COOKING+2, GAMING+2

QUIRK ADDED: ‘LORD OF THE FRIES’

ALIGNMENT SET TO ‘NONE’.

You try a few joke combinations,based on audience suggestions, along with a few of your own.

'Actual McRealname'

INPUT VERIFICATION: REJECTED. PLEASE INPUT NAME.

'big boy' REJECTED 'Huh. Any other ideas?'

Ponkrat N. Cheesehammer

REJECTED

Beef Stronkanoff

REJECTED 'What'

ExpanDong

REJECTED 'In'

Mistanphonol of Frath

REJECTED 'The'

HELPIMTRAPPEDINACHARACTERSHEETFACTORY

REJECTED 'GODDAMN'

No matter what you try, it throws a fit. This is beyond weird. How does it know they’re fake?

Why would it care?

>Bella

>Thistle

>Barrison

INPUT VERIFICATION: ACCEPTED. WELCOME, 'Bella Thistle Barrison'. AUTOMATED SYSTEMS CALIBRATED. UPLOADING VALUES TO DATABASE.

You're starting to regret waking up today.

EXTRACTING VALUES. AGE INACCURACY DETECTED. EXPECTED RANGE 14-18.

GIS MATRIX OFFLINE. MANUAL LOCATION ID REQUIRED.

SPECIALITY IDENTIFIED: GAMING.

SECONDARY SPECIALITY IDENTIFIED. INPUT CONFIRMATION REQUESTED

N

You consider making something up but you figure there’s one option that’ll be the most fun. While you were assigned female at birth, you’ve never really taken to the whole concept of gender roles. Who needs them. In fact, who even needs shitty genders in the first place?

Your character’s gender is No.

INPUT VERIFICATION: APPROVED

Your phone lights up; two of your fans have sent you messages. Oh! You almost forgot to activate your stream! With the mysterious ‘OS’ refusing to work in a Virtual Machine, you had to pull out your old capture card and configure thing the old-fashioned way. Hopefully it works.

>S

You move back towards your bed. Agh, why is it taking so long? Shitty games are generally tiny, but this thing seems to have an ungodly amount of compression. Whatever it is, it's a lot bigger than you expected. Signing, you sorta lie down and stare at the ceiling for a bit.

>Sleep

VERB IDENTIFIED: SLEEP

Yeah, you suppose you would, if you could. But you're been having a really bad time trying to sleep. It's half the reason you've been messing around with this bootleg game. Well, you assume it's a bootleg.

>Plugh

YOU ARE NOT PREPARED TO INVOKE THE POWERS OF PLUGH. (-1)

(Monday, January 15th, 2018, 04:36 am)Reyweld Wrote:  >Go [n]orth, [t]ake everything on the desk!

You cannot reach your DESK while resting on your bed! You stand up and move back over and attempt to carry everything at once. With a DEX of [ERROR: UNDEFINED] you fail miserably. Your things are now spread all over the place but luckily, nothing seems particularly damaged, except your ego.

The computer makes a strange 'ding' sound. Looks like it's finally ready.

>Commence Character Creation.

>STATUS!

Woah, That's a lot of question marks.

Esc

HELP CLOSED: MENU LOCKED

Returning to normal service, you hear a small 'ding' in your head. Whatever it was that just happened, it seems to have increased your score. Yay?

You proceed to go back to what you were doing.

>look

VERB IDENTIFIED: [L]OOK

You observe your BEDROOM. The window to the [E]ast lets in a light breeze; it's rather late in the evening and your parents are probably asleep. Or would be. They're away for the weekend, a fact you're taking advantage of tomorrow.

To the [W]est is a large wardrobe crammed full of CLOTHING, as well as your SCHOOLBAG, BOOKS and most of your CDs and DVDs.

Your BED is to the [S]outh; it's rather comfortable and warm and the sheets are a rather bright shade of green. There's a half-empty bottle of Iced Tea, with a few of its friends' carcasses littering the floor underneath. You should probably clean those up in case they start an uprising (or before mum complains again).

To the [N]orth lies your DESK and the rest of your personal belongings. Strewn across your desk are a variety of items; you may need to SEARCH through the mess to find most of your stuff. Your HEADPHONES seem obnoxiously large, though you wouldn't ever think of using anything smaller. Gotta have that open can soundstage! Other than your MONITORS, PC and FILE CABINET, it has your PHONE, KEYS, WALLET, PENCIL CASE as well as the box and manual you found earlier. An array of COMPUTER PARTS sits in a box on the rather slippery wooden floor. It got a good waxing just over a week ago, which is both a bit of a hazard and and a nuisance when the sun bounces off it into your eyes.

One of the monitors is blinking. The installation process is at 90%.

>take me

VERB IDENTIFIED:  [T]AKE

Unable to see it, you search your desk successfully.

I have on my hard drive thousands of words - alongside the pages upon pages of written notes I have compiled for over half a year now, framing the greatest work of fiction that has ever crawled itself out of the lump of grey matter between my ears. And yet, it's been sitting there, with a minimal amount of attention for a few months now; forlorn and neglected, despite it burrowing into my skull like a voracious flesh-eating worm.

It is hard to convey a vision in my mind onto paper; it is like trying to discuss a colour as a flavour, or a scent as a sensation. The task is of an enormity that I try to find every possible way to avoid working on it until I can find someone I can trust with its transcribing it into a visual medium.