“I’m not gonna fight you, you’re my brother.” “You sued me for taking your phone.” “I sat down with a lawyer to discuss my options!”

“You got me a new circular saw!” “And bandages... Aw, you remembered I’m clumsy.”

“I didn’t go there for you, I came there to talk about my feelings!” “You have feelings?” “Yeah, they started coming in a year ago.”

“I was told you’re the hero who save the family.” “Oh. Wow, I guess I am a hero. I mean I’ve been heroic a few other times. But only in dreams. One time I stopped a group of guys from robbing a bank full of girls I liked.”

“We’re so together this year we’re even doing a Christmas card. Take the photo Kenneth?” “Seems like a lot more work having to photoshop me in later, but ok.”