#speakendo

Speak Endo.

I’ve seen this tag popping up all over my tumblr feed today, and it’s been hard.  I was diagnosed with Stage 4 endometriosis at the age of 26 after undergoing a laparoscopic surgery to remove a large ovarian cyst.  At that time I had suffered for years.

For me the pain began with my very first period and because of this I always thought it was normal.  I remember watching commercials for Midol where women laid in bed with a heating pad, and hearing others complain about their cramps and I always thought they meant the same thing I was feeling.  How was I supposed to know periods weren’t supposed to be like that?

I now know that bleeding for 14 days and going through 10 pads a day and passing huge clots isn’t normal.  

I know that cramps shouldn’t mean feeling like someone is shredding your uterus from the inside out

I know that being in so much pain that you literally cannot get out of bed isn’t what they mean when they suggest Midol will help.  No, I needed huge doses of Naproxen.  

I know exactly how it feels to have an ovarian cyst rupture and I know what it’s like to have endometriosis affecting not just your reproductive organs, but also your bladder and bowels.  

But mostly, today... at the age of 35, I know how it feels to deliver a uterus, cervix and fallopian tubes so badly damaged they would never have served their purpose in creating and carrying a child.  The only thing I will ever deliver...

3 weeks ago today.