Caleb Xia and the possessive boyfriend trope
Some of you guys might already know this but it surprises me still that Caleb is my main while I was never attracted to a Caleb-type irl. So naturally I did some soul searching to understand why. What I'll talk about today is not the entirety of that "why", but possibly the most important part.
As the title suggests, it's about his possessiveness. Now, in real life I'm sure many LADies would agree that this isn't attractive and would probably label it as a red flag. However, it's so appealing in fiction. Why do we feel this way? A quick google search and you'll come across some interesting article discussing this phenomenon though not about Caleb specifically. I want to bring forth some of my own ideas and tie that to Caleb as a "morally grey" love interest.
In a nutshell, it's about PROTECTION and ACCEPTANCE.
1-The need for protection
Unfortunately, women overall are not protected under the structure we're living in. It doesn't have to be overt like someone coming at you with a knife. It could be covert like someone making weird comments about your body, crossing boundaries, and you have no safe space to talk about it.
With this, you live in a state of constant anxiety. Most of the time it's not dramatic but it runs quietly in the background. You're not really in danger but you're constantly prepared for it. You're hyper vigilant. You might not even be aware of it but it takes up a lot of mental energy.
One thing about protection that people often fail to understand is it's not always about making sure danger never happens, but it's also about IF it does, there will be repercussion. Justice, if you will. In reality, not a lot of women get to experience justice and protection in this way.
2-Outsourcing vigilance
So now Caleb comes in, and we know his possessiveness toward MC stems from his intense desire to protect her from harm. Can you see? He wants to eradicate danger before it even gets a chance to form itself. If anything were to happen, which it did, we saw how Caleb exacted revenge on those who harmed MC.
He scans the room, he notices the danger, he runs to shield you before you even realize what's going on. Now you get to rest. People misunderstand that for him wanting to "own" MC but that's not it. Caleb is not looking to overpower her or restrict her freedom, he's doing this to make sure she's safe.
His methods can be extreme, but we as the player know the motive behind it, which is to provide MC with protection no matter what. It's not hard to see why many players find this dynamic to be cathartic. With Caleb, you know that you'll never have to justify your fear. Caleb is already holding space for you.
3-The containment of "danger"
Hiding her away, faking her d3ath so no one could find her and harm her. Is that extreme? Yes, but we as the player know that Caleb is this way due to layers upon layers of trauma AND he knows this AND he's trying to get better. So whatever morally grey fantasy has been created, there's an unspoken certainty that boundaries won't be crossed.
If there's any real danger from Caleb, it's targeted toward the people who want to harm MC. Caleb is outwardly aggressive when it comes to these threats but in his personal moments with MC, he's very controlled. So even he himself is aware of this containment.
You know he won't ever hurt you. It's in the text. You know he's incapable of actually putting you in danger. When he's being possessive, within context, you know it's not coming from a place of harm. Sometimes it the outward expression of neediness and his fear of abandonment, rather than an actual desire to dominate you.
4-It's all about you
If you have ever felt like you're constantly overlooked, never chosen, never heard or seen, the possessive boyfriend trope could be very appealing to you. You might have even internalized this being your fault, that there's something wrong with you (there isn't). The fantasy of having someone being this obsessed over you and not for any other reason than you being you is comforting, healing even.
Out of all the LIs, Caleb (in this timeline) grew up with MC. He's been with her for the longest. He knows everything about her, flaws and all. And he loves all of her. This is why their relationship is so interesting to me because in his last solo Indulgent Scheme, this theme also comes up but in reverse. He's always loved every part of her but now it's her turn to express that she loves every part of him. My heart ecstatically flutters
Closing
Let me end this by saying this is just my opinions based on my own experiences so I'm not saying everyone who mains Caleb feels this way. If you do and you resonate with what I wrote here, thanks for reading I know I always do the most when it comes to these things so I appreciate you stick around till the end.
Disclaimer: 1. Everything is my own personal opinions based on how I understand and interpret the character(s). 2. My analysis is meant for entertainment purposes only. 3. Do not repost without credit, thank you!
Love, Celine














