Hey! Iām gay, itās Christmas, Iām writing gay Christmas fic. Working on cranking out a fic for Happiest Season that was going to be a long oneshot, then a nice little 2 chapter, and has settled on becoming an 8 chapter fic.
If you enjoy a little slow burn, a lot of emotional processing, and were interested in the possibility of a story you thought was about a couple trying to survive one terrible Christmas actually being the story of how a different couple falls together well, perhaps I can interest you in my lil fic.Ā Ā
Read the fic here on AO3!
Summary:
A: It really was maybe the only redeeming point, getting to kick it with you. Thanks for helping me out.
A: I would like to point out though that we are in fact...talking right now. Oh shit, the wonders of technology! We donāt actually have to miss talking to each other if we don't feel like it, do we?ā
Right away, she gets a response message agreeing: No, we donāt.
//
Abby walks out on Christmas Eve and rides with John back to Pittsburgh, but the things that happened this wild past handful of days don't disappear. If anything, they stay with her weeks, months, a year and more later. But they soften, grow, change shape; they shift her life in more ways than she could have anticipated.
Texts from Riley are waiting on her phone when she and John walk back into her and Harper's apartment. She texts Riley back and then they just never stop texting.
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|| One overthinking gayās remix of the best queer spy vs spy romance on film, if bits of Season 1 were smushed with bits of Season 2 and it all started with a meetcute in a grocery aisle.
Chapter 04: Shapeless butt jiggling
|| Villanelle is nosy, judgmental, and incapable of ever just catching a break.
Click here or on the header above to give it a read!
Hello from me, the writer:
[Spoiler warning: come back here after youāve read the chap, Iām gonna talk about it]
This chapter ended up being my longest so far. I hope you enjoyed it! I donāt expect the word count to keep growing higher and higher every chapter. I kind of try to keep them on the shorter side really, so I know Iāve given the chapter a point, but I plan to just kind of feel out what seems right on a case by case basis. This chapter had a lot of beats, a lot of things I wanted to accomplish, and then they all expanded as I fleshed things out with the actual writing.
I donāt really know if Iād say the writing in this fic is ~my writing style~Ā because Iām comfortable writing so many different things - a million papers in college for my English degree, cover letters for jobs, internships, projects, instructional writing on a hundred completely different types of industries for work, editing anything other people write, working on my and my partnerās original stories.Ā
But this is my first time writing any fanfiction at all. And this is how it started out, and this is the cadence, tone, stacks on stacks of clauses, etc that Iām just rolling with I guess. I hope itās working for you.
In this chapter, weāre back in Villanelleās head. Iām still exploring what my characterization of her will be like, but Iām trying for some balance so far. Itās so strange to me writing an AU for Killing Eve. Itās done so much good in canon, thereās so much there, that it seems almost a waste, almost silly, to drag these two to an alternate universe. When I try to do it, I mean. I read and enjoy lots of Killing Eve AUs, but can get self conscious about mine.
Itās an interesting exercise trying to build the connection, the dynamic between these two up from scratch. I selectively work a lot from canon into A6R, but I shift it, stick it under a different lens, prod at it withĀ āwell, what if this timeā¦ā Thereās not that excellent, incredibly rich established trajectory for me to build from. I have to earn it some other way, which Iām still figuring it out.Ā
Itās fun though, moving them along steps at a time. This chapter tries to move us several steps on several different tracts at once and hopefully future me will make good on it lol. Thereās a lot at play. Villanelle is focused on herself still, but Eve sort of interests her. But this Eve doesnāt know her, isnāt heading a task force just to seek out her. She didnāt see Eve in a bathroom and ruin her life over it.
Theyāve gone straight to co-habiting, without any of the obsession, pain, conviction, doubt, chase we love them for. So weāre along for their little adventure of learning each other, watching them each be surprisingly correct and incredibly wrong about the other. While also doing dumb domestic shit like eating bad eggs. If you want good scrambled eggs by the way, try Gordon Ramseyās technique; itās on Youtube.
If you read these behind-the-scenes rambles of mine, youāre the real star here. Thank you and Queer Jesus bless you. Please talk to me, love me some talkin bout stuff. And if you like the fic, share it with a buddy :]
I feel likeā¦.someoneās watching me.
Eve looks up from the two flimsy boxes in her hands (microwave stroganoff and frozen gluten-free shepherdās pie) to see that someone was indeed looking intensely her way. A woman stands a few feet away, cart halted, staring right at her. Young, sickly pale, hair in disarray, clung sweaty to her forehead.
Eve figures she should probably address this situation.
|| One overthinking gayās remix of the best queer spy vs spy romance on film, if bits of Season 1 were smushed with bits of Season 2 and it all started with a meetcute in a grocery aisle.
Chapter 03: More of a tectonic movement
|| Be patient when getting to know someone new: sometimes people wonāt be so comfortable sharing certain things with you until youāve earned their trust.
Click here or on the header above to give it a read!
Hello from me, the writer:
[Spoiler warning: come back here after youāve read the chap, Iām gonna talk about it]
Find it kinda weird but fun writing interactions where nobody fully knows what anybody elseās deal is and youāre always stuck trying to figure it out through one characterās lens at a time.Thereās what Villanelle knows about herself (which we donāt know all of yet). Thereās what Eve knows about herselfĀ (which we donāt know all of yet either). Thereās what Villanelle knows about Eve (little) and what Eve knows about Villanelle (even less). Who even knows whatās going on here.
Hope youāre looking forward to seeing two little curious clever reckless punks try to be roommates, and also they will constantly be eating because food is all I care about on this earth.Ā
I feel likeā¦.someoneās watching me.
Eve looks up from the two flimsy boxes in her hands (microwave stroganoff and frozen gluten-free shepherdās pie) to see that someone was indeed looking intensely her way. A woman stands a few feet away, cart halted, staring right at her. Young, sickly pale, hair in disarray, clung sweaty to her forehead.
Eve figures she should probably address this situation.
|| One overthinking gayās remix of the best queer spy vs spy romance on film, if bits of Season 1 were smushed with bits of Season 2 and it all started with a meetcute in a grocery aisle.
Chapter 02: Carefully practiced vulnerability
|| Tips for making a new friend: try having a light conversation to get to know each other over a shared snack.
Click here or on the header above to give it a read!
Hello from me, the writer:
Hellooo who else is gay and horny for weird?? [Spoiler warning: come back here after youāve read the chap, Iām gonna talk about it]
Eve Polastri understands you, because sheās thirsty for a strangerās stab hole. And Villanelle also understands you because is thirsty for Eve being thirsty for stabs. Their brain cell truly is away on holiday.
I enjoyed writing this chapter a lot since these Eve, V, and all the rest of us get to chill for one second and a indulge in some conversation. Also I like switching around the POV between two unreliable narrators. Iām always interested in what characterization you can pick up on through someoneās narrative perspective.Ā
Lasagna-for-one man from the grocery aisle is Julian, yeah. Oksana and Eveās ships in the night moment in Nice and Neat was a perfect beautiful gut-punch. I wouldnāt trade away that so-tired lingering stare at Eve striding savior-like, fucking near godly, fucking dream-esque slow-motion towards the hell house Oksana just escaped, just ONE moment too late for them to be together again. In that moment at least she knows clever, determined, mutually obsessed Eve came for her after all.
But yea Iām not beholden to writing whatās good for the show so fuck it! This one episode and this one moment are what I latched onto and what made me decide to exploreĀ āhey, what if it wasnāt Julian who Villanelle saw in that store, what if it was Eve? What if it was Eve, who she saw for the first time in that aisle?ā Iām not even close to above daydreaming about Eve and V getting to hang out domestically in Eveās house, not even a little. Iām so gay for domesticity and slice-of-life and my being yearns for it.
Had kind of a dickens of a time trying to problem solve the issue of Vās false backstory here. She told Eve she couldnāt involve authorities, she showed up with an obvious wound, she doesnāt have friends or anyone around to turn to. Maybe the lies she gives here still wouldnāt convince someone with a better sense of self-preservation, but weāll see how Eve feels about it. Hopefully you all find her made up story acceptable for the fic at least.
