#softtrade

I think a lot of us remember that time in our identity formation and recall how much it uhhh sucked tho. There’s only so many times you can be told yr entire social and gendered identity is based on supporting yr partner (while suffering infidelity and financial, physical, and emotional abuse) before you try to expand what that identity means.

yeah I mean I agree w that personally. Tho I guess usually when people are talking abt these are when they are in aggregates (so like, including mastectomies w vaginoplasties) that basically is an umbrella of 'medical and medical-adjacent things trans people do to their bodies'

When I was an escort I always had the futile hope that w my cd clients I would at least be able to talk abt clothes and fashion but like... there's something abt it being a fetish that really messes w their aesthetic approach I feel like

^^^ "oh wow I just happened to call someone best of both worlds tee hee i have some knowledge of porn but I had *never* considered it before" is like classic chaser approach. It's always a fluke lol

yeaaahhh, definitely. I was, fwiw, only joking about her being ‘okay’ and ‘misunderstood’ - she’s obviously a transmisogynist & likely a chaser, I just thought it was funny how she spoke to me, which was like, yknow, overly intense cis lesbian or w/e lol. It was kinda endearing yknow. But also like, she probably acted like that with me because I’m a tw, like it didn’t really matter that I was mad at her, she could just talk abt her insecurities literally in the middle of an argument & expect me to make her feel better abt it, yknow. (She also kept asking if I was trans until I answered)

I think the combination of that plus the publish or perish attitude that privileges writing nonsense over like actually being a good teacher, leads to the large amount of frankly unnecessary and unnecessarily specialized literature

Ace scores are used within trauma epidemiology for the “adverse childhood experiences” series of questions. Basically there’s a positive correlation between a ton of negative health incomes (as well as IPV perpetration and other criminal behavior) and childhood trauma. Like I’m just a bit suspect of using a study from a fuckin DAs office where they threatened to use pseudoscience (polygraph is not scientifically supported) against incarcerated people as like “evidence” for a variety of reasons

thanks for filling that in! <3

the guy who writes WDHDT definitely seems to have plenty of sympathy with the ‘justice’ system as it stands and I should be conscious of that i guess

While I think it has its merits, I feel like WDHDT isn’t a systemically focused book. Like the ace score relationship to interpersonal violence perpetration is pretty clear