#softsad

But at night? It’s just you. No expectations. No noise.

You think about old conversations, people you almost became, futures that almost happened.

"If found, it is mud. If lost, it is gold."

We are incapable of valuing the present while we’re inside it.

When you have it

the house, the person, the ordinary morning

it feels heavy.

Messy.

Repetitive.

Something to get through.

But the moment it’s gone

it changes.

The same Tuesday you once rushed through becomes something you would beg for.

The noise becomes warmth. The routine becomes comfort. The “nothing special” becomes everything.

And suddenly

you would give anything to stand in that mud again.

We spend our lives standing on something valuable

calling it ordinary.

By the time we realize it was gold

and then... a friend casually goes, “yeah you’re pretty, maybe a 9/14 in class, and like a 6.8/10 overall.” i laughed it off, but that comment? it stuck.

i know i’ve always struggled with self-confidence. i’ve always felt kinda average, not someone who turns heads — and i was okay with that. but today, something about hearing that rating just made me spiral. like damn. maybe i really am ugly.

There’s a specific kind of grief for the person you were supposed to be.

The one who didn’t have to learn survival like a second language. The one who stayed soft because the world never asked them to harden.

I think about her sometimes.

Not as a memory but as a possibility that never got the chance to exist.

Sometimes it feels like she’s walking beside me, quiet, untouched

Ayer hablando con mi mamá le decía que en un momento del día hasta tuve envidia de las celadoras o las señoras de servicio por que Mka estaban ahí y eran felices

Y me daba rabia no con ellas si no conmigo como hpta tanto esfuerzo para que al final me cueste tanto ser feliz

For the late-night overthinkers, the ones who almost said something, the ones who still replay old conversations in their head.

🎶 Tracklist: 1️⃣ I Love You, I’m Sorry – Gracie Abrams 2️⃣ Risk – Gracie Abrams 3️⃣ Hardest Part – Olivia Dean 4️⃣ Just for Me – PinkPantheress 5️⃣ Right Now – Gracie Abrams 6️⃣ Call It Fate, Call It Karma – The Strokes 7️⃣ Invisible String – Taylor Swift 8️⃣ Falling Behind – Laufey 9️⃣ Ghostin’ – Ariana Grande 🔟 The Night We Met – Lord Huron