#thishurts

“Until death do us part” is the most beautiful horror story we ever invented.

It doesn’t mean “we will always be happy.”

It means:

I will watch time change you.

Or

you will watch it change me.

We treat “forever” like a fairytale.

But forever means staying long enough to witness the unraveling.

The hands that once held flowers will someday tremble.

The face you memorized in perfect light will become unfamiliar in slow motion.

And if you are lucky

really lucky

you will still love them anyway.

That’s the terrifying part.

Not the wedding.

Not the vows.

The aftermath.

The years after the photographs stop looking current.

The nights spent holding someone together while their body slowly negotiates with time.

The moment you realize the person who once carried you upstairs now needs help standing up.

People think love is finding someone perfect.

It isn’t.

It’s choosing to remain when the version you fell in love with starts disappearing.

And maybe that’s what “forever” actually means.

Not eternal happiness.

Just two people agreeing to witness each other’s slow transformation

Hades is such a hypocrite. He got impatient and came early for Persephone. (BYE BYE SUMMER) Alike to how Orpheus’ own doubts and worries made him impatient and scared so he turned. AND WOW HE LOST EURYDICE AND HADES YOUR MARRIAGE IS FAILING- LIKE COME ON MAN!! AND THE FATES BEING SO IRONIC THE IRONY OF IT ALL AND THE MELDY LIKE HE STOPPED SINGING THE SONG NEAR THE END AS HE WAS ALMOST BLOODY FRICKIN THERE—

I even knew the ending beforehand like. IT STILL MADE ME CRY. I EXPECTED IT AND BRACED MYSELF BUT HERE I AM STILL FRICKIN SAD. THIS DAMN TRAGEDY

-MVGr3y

I want a hug, but I also need to distance myself from you

I want your attention, but I know I wont get it easily

I want you to pick me up and spin me with each hug

But I dont want the heartache after we depart

I want to say I love you, but it hurts too much to say it

Admitting that I love you is as scary as admitting that I like you

These mixed feelings tear me apart

Knowing you probably don’t feel the same way

For now i’ll sink back into the wall

Hoping I disappear

Long enough to the point you miss my presence

Although you ask where I am

Every time i’m not there

I might sound crazy

If I am, call me crazy

I know I get too attached

I already know

When I think about you, my love

I think of your lovely baby giggles

I think of your toddler belly laugh 

I think of you mimicking me going “Hahaha” 

I think of rocking you to sleep every night I had you

How softly your eyes would close while we rocked back and forth

How tightly you held onto my shirt for the first 4 months of your life

As if you were scared if you didn’t hold on

Then I might slip away 

I remember the first time you gave me a slobbery baby kiss

It made my sing a million songs

When I think of you

655 days ago

I was the one hurting more than you

You had no idea that you would never see me again

You were only 13 months old

You were going to a good home

A stable home 

All day Every Day 

Not just when you were with me half the month

I knew these people are good

They adopted you

I am forever grateful to these complete strangers 

For taking care of you when your parents didn’t care enough to

But our story has come and gone

Within 393 days

 Of you being born

So when I think of you

I think of the galaxies in your blue eyes 

At the end of this ep, Cas basically said in simpler terms “You don’t care about me. I lost Jack, the person I thought of as my son. You and Sam have each other, and I don’t have anyone. I don’t matter to you, Dean, and I know there’s no point in me staying here any longer. I need to move on.”

Okay, now, this scene was absolutely heart wrenching, and as a full on Dean girl who loves Dean to death; I am pissed at him. He fucked up. He pushed Cas hard enough that he finally broke, and laid out all his feelings after years of bottling them up. Was this painful as all hell? Yes. But it was so necessary.

We’ve seen so far this season that there is a lot of unspoken things between Cas and Dean- hell there’s been unspoken things between them for years. Cas and Dean need to have this fight. Cas needed to finally make it know just how useless, and uncared for the Winchesters really made Cas feel, and Dean needed to realize that he can’t keep making Cas feel like shit and expect him to stick around for it. All the feelings have been laid bare, and they can’t ignore it anymore.

We’ve seen Cas take off before, and he always came back, but this time felt far more permanent. (Trust me Dean felt that too) Cas isn’t going to come back and ask for Dean’s forgiveness. (unless the writers are really, painfully stupid) Dean has to be the one to apologize for once. And it can’t a simple, short “I’m sorry” either. If Dean truly wants Cas back, he’s going to have to grovel. He’s going to have get on is hands and knees and beg for Cas’s forgiveness. Dean is going to have to stop shoving all those feelings for Cas down, because if he wants Cas back he’s going to have to admitt them. Because the only way Cas is going to believe Dean really cares about him is if Dean says it aloud how much he needs and loves Cas.