#skiloose

Drinking still water

Rocking back and forth

Screaming to the sky

Feeling like a corpse

Want to talk to God

Can’t go in the church

So you lay your head

On its cold stone porch

I could sing you a lullaby

Did your mom sing one to you?

I won’t get all the lyrics right

But I can still try and find the tune

You can barely crawl

Even still you try

From six feet away

They all pass you by

Leaving you to seize

Leaving you to die

Absent from their prayers

May you stay alive

I could sing you a lullaby

Did your dad hum this same one

As he tucked you in at night

watching bugs slam into streetlights

reaching for something beyond them

do they think of that light as a friend?

is the sunrise a curse or a godsend?

i wake up at three in the morning

or maybe “wake up” isn’t quite the right word

i look at the red blinking stoplight

and then back to my pillow i try to return

maybe bugs are all destined for space

maybe if they go high enough they become stars

but we made these distractions

which snuff out the moonlight

I am a sapling

And you say you’re Mother Earth;

The sun, rain, and soil

Nourished by your hands

Beneath my shade, gently hold

My delicate trunk

Chipping away bark

Carving initials in me

Defaced and engraved

Keys, your implement

(You left your blade in the car)

My cambium, scarred

The forest is vast

So nobody will notice

Push me on the swing

See the day moon keeping watch

She should be asleep

it’s all a game

unassuming kind eyes

and soft hands

and a gentle smile

urine samples and blood tests

and a juice box to help with the nausea

massage my arm to find a vein

questions i can’t or won’t answer

gasp back to life

apologize to my cat