#sinpachi

Shinpachi’s cold anger is mostly due to the fact that he is angry at himself. He feels like the whole “moping” (or, y’know, grieving)  and not coping well with Gintoki’s disappearance would disappoint Gintoki, and that he is not strong enough without him. 

Shinpachi and Gintoki never told anybody that they were dating. Basically everyone knew it anyway, but Shinpachi thinks that its his secret and feels twice as alone, as he has no one to fully share his grief with. And of course everyone is very considerate and stuff and they don’t let Shinpachi know that they knew about the two of them, so Shinpachi suffers alone. 

When Gintoki comes to future and sees Shinpachi he feels so guilty - because this is more or less everything he feared when they started their relationship. Shinpachi is a mess, and there is seemingly very little left of this warm, optimistic Shinpachi, who wore his heart on his sleeve, he’s alone and that’s Gintoki’s fault. (He ignores of course  the fact that even if they weren’t in a relationship, his disappearance would take its toll on Shinpachi) 

On the other hand Gintoki felt strange, completly inappropriate pang of joy at Shinpachi’s misery - for him  it meant Shinpachi really loved him. Gintoki always doubted that it was real love on Shinpachi’s side; not that he ever doubted that Shinpachi thought it was love, but it could have been a crush, admiration etc. and one day Shinpachi would meet someone and realize that THIS was his real love, not Gintoki. But Gintoki was long gone from the picture and Shinpachi was still heartbroken. So, not a crush. In other news, Gintoki hates himself now even more than before.