I am in love. Like a love that I cannot explain, I just want to ride for him. Be with him. Eventually, I an see myself being his Mrs. He knows it. I just cant tell him. He is weird with affection so I try not to smother him. I love him. I dont know what to do. A part of me doesnt want to love him. See, I knew him since I was 7, infatuated since I was 9 had him when I was 12 lost him and got him back at 16. I am 23 and all I want is him. Is it weird. Am I strange? I really want to live day by day and not get my hopes up, because he isnt my boyfriend but little does he know, I am his girlfriend, yet I am single. That sucks, where is the mutality. I am not sure but my heart and mind tell me otherwise. He is intoxicating, I lose all my inhibitions. I am me when I am with him but even through his weirdness, I know he loves me.I know he wants me. But he is like any other typical man and is afraid of what this can do to him. I promise it wont hurt him. I dont know how to do anything but love him. Ive loved him since I was 9, its already a habit. Back like he never left and I am just trying to make sure that he never leaves again. So I pray for guidance and for patience because I know with him, I will need it. I cant afford any wrong turns. Is this unhealthy? Call the doctor quick. Dont kill me, dont hurt me, dont revive me, just be on standby.
Like, I love you. Dont you get it, I will move across country if you asked me. I want to be where you are at all times and you worried about if we are compatible? I dont want to rush, I cant afford to fall. Ill play by your game, Ill take it one day at a time. I will do it all because you asked me to.
