#shitty words

Abel was thinking again.

It...it was often he started thinking about stuff like this, about stuff happening in his life. He thought about saving the Tiberius’ fighter, thought about how Praxis wouldn’t help him find any info on Cain, thought about...well, his relationship with the fighter.

He couldn’t help but think about what happened to his previous fighters. He couldn’t help but hope to whatever god was out there that Cain was serious about loving him. No...of course Cain wasn’t serious. He got a new navigator every month. Cain couldn’t be serious, he couldn’t-!

And then, it struck him.

His previous navigators...did...they all do that with Cain? Did they all let him fuck them? Were they…

Were they all desperate as he was to sleep with someone?

No. Abel doubted that...he doubted that anyone was as desperate as him. He...indeed, was desperate, he was desperate to sleep with anyone, really, he just wanted to know what it was like-!

But, now he was regretting his decisions.

The nightmares of Cain betraying him and leaving him were only becoming more and more present, sometimes waking him from his sleep. When they did...Cain would (usually) be awake, ask what was wrong, and would awkwardly ask if he wanted to talk about it.

Abel would always smile at Cain’s efforts to be kinder. To be better.

Cain would often make Abel sleep with him, quite literally. Cain, despite how he acted, did tend to be a cuddler (after sex, of course). That was the other thing, though...did...Cain only care about Abel for sex? That seemed reasonable, actually...Cain always was up for sex, even if Abel was the one who wanted it…

Abel suddenly felt sad.

Abel suddenly wanted to get a new fighter, someone actually trustworthy…

Abel suddenly felt like leaving, going somewhere open, yet alone.

Then Cain walked in, sitting beside Abel and ruffling the blonde hair with the green strands in it. Cain pushed it to the side, kissing Abel’s forehead gently, eyebrows drawn together. Abel flinched a bit, getting up and putting on his smile. He...didn’t want to look weak, now did he?

“A-Ah, Cain!! I was just...leaving, actually…”

“Where?”

“That’s none of your business!”

“Abel….”

“I-I just have to shower, jeez!”

“I can tell you’re lying to me, Abel.”

Abel cursed Cain under his breath, looking away and shaking his head. He...couldn’t let Cain know. Couldn’t let Cain know that he actually was worried...worried about the fighter.

“Am not! You just are seeing things, you overgrown dog. Now, if you excuse me-”

“No.”

Abel let out a silent gasp, dropping onto the bed, Cain sitting on Abel’s hips to keep him down. Abel already knew thrashing about would make him more suspicious, so he stayed still, trying his best to look pissed instead of scared. He frowned, Cain looking at him with a neutral expression, studying Abel’s face.

“Hey! Get off, Cain!”

“...You usually get flustered about this.”

“I’m not in th- get off!”

Abel growled, shoving Cain off of him and getting up quickly, Cain looking...what, surprised? Oh god...he...nono, it wasn’t hurt!

Abel quickly left, whispering a sorry. Praxis walked in after, glaring at Cain, Cain glaring right back. He wasn’t in the mood for Praxis’ bullshit, but here eyepatch was, and by the look on his face...he wasn’t leaving. He let the door shut, leaning against the wall and sighing deeply.

“Get out of my sleeping quarters, eyepatch.”

“Actually, it’s your room and Abel’s quarters.”

“Shut it. Just get out.”

“What did you do?”

“I don’t know! He just fucking left, how the hell am I supposed to know?!”

“I knew he deserved a better fighter than you…”

“Shut up, fucking prick! I will drag you out myself if you don-”

“I know why he’s sad. Will you listen or not?”

“...Why the fuck would you help me?”

“He’s stuck with you. Might as well help you to understand him.”

Praxis was looking down at the pissed off Cain, who after an internal struggle, finally agreed. He nodded, still glaring at Praxis, who sat on the opposite side of Cain.

“Don’t think this makes us friends. I still hate you.”

“I don’t want to be a brute’s “friend”. We see how Abel is handling that.”

Praxis tossed what seemed like a paper notebook (Which, really, were pretty rare in those times) at Cain, sighing deeply. Cain caught it easily, flipping open a page, confused. Praxis could tell the wheels were trying to turn in Cain’s brain, and he decided to save Cain’s energy.

“It’s a journal or something. I...found it.”

“You stole it from him. He did mention missing something personal.”

“Shut up. He lost it, and I just...made sure it was his. Anyways, just listen. He writes a lot about you in there. Turns out your ‘little slut’ is starting to get cold feet about sex with you.”

Oh.

Now it made sense why Abel left quickly.

He...didn’t like quite a few things Cain did in bed, and in general. He could tell that by flipping through the journal.

“I helped you. I don’t expect you to owe me. I don’t want that.”

“Hey, Praxis.”

“Yes?”

“...Nothing. See you.”

Praxis huffed a sigh out, getting up and leaving. He then spotted Abel walking back, looking pretty gloomy. He resisted the urge to hug the navigator. He only whispered a “sorry” before he kept walking, Abel walking into the room, Cain getting up and hugging the blond boy. He felt the way Abel tensed, trying to back up.

“A-Ah, Cain...uhm, I-I still have to shower, so...sorry for snapping at you, I-I’m jus-”

“Don’t lie to me, Abel. If you don’t like how we have sex, then we’ll change it. If you don’t like it at all, we won’t do it. I’ll...suppress the urges around you, at least.”

“H-Huh…? N-No, no...it’s not that I...don’t want it! I-It’s just...u-uhm…”

“Don’t worry about sex with me. Just worry about doing your job, smartass.”

Cain grinned, Abel feeling a small smile worm it’s way on his face.

Sure, he was still worried about the other navigators Cain had...but that could wait for another day. Right now, he was snugged up to Cain, enjoying the other’s heartbeat and the almost calm silence between them.